The joys of advertising a shitter to the idiot public

[Father Ted]

Cars I seem to have been reasonably lucky about, all have been either ebayed and sold off ebay a day or two before the auction closed (its better than autotrader for reaching an audience) or traded in (and Im fairly realistic about what to expect as a trade in so dont piss about too much haggling).

Caravans on the other hand seem to attract every mad irishman and his horse.

I really hate selling caravans. Dont get me started on the grade A twats I have had round here when I sold my last van.

 

Anyway, Im off to photograph a razor and palmolive shaving stick in the snow....

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

They are looking at 500 quid cars because they're poor. They're poor because they're fucking idiots.

 

Thanks for that sweeping statement- some of us have been made redundant and need cheaper wheels. I am working on a crap wage as a van driver because its a job but cant afford £500 + Cars

 

Please accept my apologies - no offence intended Sir. I've been in that position myself, and no, it's not funny.

 

But I did put this in my first post to indemnify myself - "Sub £1000 and you are - with the exception of you fine Gents - dealing with vermin, the sweaty underpant gusset of the public".

 

Sensitivity is not my forte alas.

[dollywobbler]

Well, sure enough, despite telling anyone with feedback of less than 10 to email me before bidding, someone with zero feedback has bid on the CX. I've written to him telling him to send me a landline number or his bid will be quietly terminated. I do know what the previous bloke was bidding, so not all bad news!

[Rusty Pelican]

Fully understand the broke situation , Been in a position where £100 was all I could spend on a motor if I was going to insure it at the same time , Now I buy cheap motors coz I want too , I could , if pushed spend far more but choose to buy what I consider quality old tat , mainly German and not VW .

[pandamonium]

I buy cheap cars because the cars I like just so happen to be cheap!

[Pillock]

Well, I've had a lovely day of buying and selling. Cobbler's mate offered to buy the Golf, and then shock horror turned up and bought it within a couple of hours.

And I went and put a bit of a silly offer on the BMW and had my hand snapped off. Lovely.

[Pete-M]

My views on selling cars to the idiot public are pretty well versed.

 

Basically, I advertise on ebay and make it blindingly, glaringly, painfully obvious even to retards that I'm not going to do any deals at all with anybody who isn't standing in front of the car in question with a big wedge of cash.

 

More often than not I'll offer it to you lot and a few other forums, then chuck it on ebay with a very snottily worded ad.

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

More often than not I'll offer it to you lot

 

WTS UR LWST PRCE M8?

[RedSparrow]

I agree with pretty much all of what has been said here.

I have always sold to either friends/family/collegues who I know are reasonable people, even though I've often taken a hit on the price, but have always stated ALL the flaws with the vehicle and that I don't want to know if there is a problem after money has changed hands. Sold to Alexg on here too which was possibly the quickest and smoothest transaction ever.

Recently trying to sell 2001 Fiesta, a collegue was interested, but I did start to worry when she said she was going to get her boyfriend WHO CAN'T DRIVE to 'check the bodywork'.

Luckily my dad bought it from me to use as a courtesy car for his customers before this expert of automotive engineering got to kick the fucking tyres.

[Andrew353w]

I bought my current motor from a fellow Autoshiter for £200 and my £200 Citroen's still going strong! It IS the dog's bollocks, BUT the important differences are: 1/ I was dealing with a gentleman 2/ Had the car been crap that would have been down to me, and 3/ I know enough about cars to know when I've bought a minter, and this car IS a minter!

 

From past experience might I make the following suggestions to the Autoshite community when selling motors:

 

1/Pop into your local corner shop & buy a SIM card & use this and an old mobile to do the deal; once the deal's done, burn the SIM!

2/Get them to sign a receipt accepting the car and hang onto it. Of course, if they can't read or write, have a mate witness that they have taken it in good faith.

3/ You can tell over the phone who really IS interested vs. who is just on the try on. Appointments aren't worth much when getting rid of a £500 car, so don't be surprised if they don't turn up. Only make appointments that don't put you out.

 

Or, just offer it to the friendly community of Autoshite; with advice, technical help, "A" frame towing offers and a whole host of other assistance this IS the place to be sure of an honest deal for your "previously owner" desirable family car!

[M'coli]

1/Pop into your local corner shop & buy a SIM card & use this and an old mobile to do the deal; once the deal's done, burn the SIM!

When I was trying to sell my Mum's car last year, I learned this lesson when Jack Killian phoned just as I was getting to sleep, and didn't seem to understand what "after 9 am" meant.

[ProgRocker]

Just never thought anyone here would really be wanting an L reg escort 1.3 - the most underpowered motor in existance!

 

Probably not as grim as a Mk5 Escort 1.8LD

 

Here is my old 1.8 LD in it's grimness:

0-60 in....a long time!

 

Reading some of the tales on this thread made me glad that I traded this abomination in for my Almera.

[vivapower]

i once sold a nissan micra for £30 only to be hounded by car recovery companies because the new 'owner' had a fake address and ragged the arse off the car and dumped it. obviously i told the recovery company to politly chuff off!.

 

im selling a vauxhall viva estate project car on ebay and get questions from some cheeky sods.

someone was asking for more pics because he wanted to know how to repair the wings he had and how the fixed to the body. (no intention to buy)

another was advertising his recovery company and how he was fully insured and all that crap (no intention to buy)

and some others i went to the trouble to reply to and then they dont bid.

at least there not really pissing me about on the phone and in person if i were to advertise in the local bargain paper.

[Negative Creep]

Although I've had idiots buying I think I've been lucky as I never had any sort of aftersales comeback. No "you never told me this was wrong, my mate's a lawyer/copper blah blah blah". Did have a close call after taking a Paypal payment for a car, which was promptly withdrawn by Paypal themselves a few days later after it turned out he didn't have enough money. Thankfully he turned out to be honest and sent me the full payment although I could very easily have been screwed over. Lesson learnt there.

 

Never bought a car off anyone here though (almost bought an Accord off Alexg which conked out just as I was leaving to collect) but that's just because I never have the cash/space or it's too far away

[Cavcraft]

It's actually the sub-£150 shitters that often cause the most grief because the buyers are often smackheads and n'er-do-wells who want something 'legal looking' to burn round in until they get pulled. False name and address or blazzing off instead of stopping then you as the seller cop the shit for it.

Luckily for me despite having had this done to me by a couple of dodgy buyers* I always made them leave me a receipt with their details on. Never had any qualms about telling the authorities who had bought the cars as anyone who bought one was always told I didn't want to hear back from them or about the car ever again.

 

* I didn't know they were dodgy at the time.

[autofive]

It's actually the sub-£150 shitters that often cause the most grief because the buyers are often smackheads and n'er-do-wells who want something 'legal looking' to burn round in until they get pulled. False name and address or blazzing off instead of stopping then you as the seller cop the shit for it.

Luckily for me despite having had this done to me by a couple of dodgy buyers* I always made them leave me a receipt with their details on. Never had any qualms about telling the authorities who had bought the cars as anyone who bought one was always told I didn't want to hear back from them or about the car ever again.

 

* I didn't know they were dodgy at the time.

 

i used to find asking for them to pose for a photo with their new purchase stopped most of the smackheads - they dont like having their photo taken

 

mate of mine who lives near Glasgow sold a festa last year and was arrested at his workplace a couple of weeks later - he sold it to a bunch of 'neds' ( i understand this is a local phrase ) who used it as a getaway car after robbing a bookies. He didnt have the v5c; "the buyer offered to post it for me" and when chased by the politzi they had abandoned it with foil and brown spoons still inside - my mate nearly lost his job over the whole affair - he's learned his lesson now though

[mattblack]

Sold a MK5 Cortina for £100 once, back when the seller gave the V5 to the buyer to send off. About a week later the phone rang just as I was leaving for work in the morning... local coppers asking if I was the owner of FOG 57V. It had been used in a robbery.

 

Bit later I sold a lilac(!) MK1 Cavalier, a week later someone at work asked me when I had smashed my car up... sure enough it was on the verge by a main road in Leicester, with the front stoved in. A few days later I got a summons for dangerous driving through the post. After the Cortina incident I had made a note of the buyers name and address...

[Guest]

I had made a note of the buyers name and address...

 

Do what I do - photocopy the logbook before you send it off. I have done this for years and twice it has saved me from being in the shit.

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

Sold a MK5 Cortina for £100 once, back when the seller gave the V5 to the buyer to send off. About a week later the phone rang just as I was leaving for work in the morning... local coppers asking if I was the owner of FOG 57V. It had been used in a robbery.

 

 

Ditto. In 1989 I sold a Cortina IV (VGN655R) through Witney Car Auctions. Got a visit from the Feds a fortnight later - apparently the scum who bought it had done an armed robbery at Jewsons in Swindon.

[Tayne]

.

[chaseracer]

 

Ditto. In 1989 I sold a Cortina IV (VGN655R) through Witney Car Auctions. Got a visit from the Feds a fortnight later - apparently the scum who bought it had done an armed robbery at Jewsons in Swindon.

 

I can't imagine Jewsons being a cash business, even back then.

Morons.

Urgent DIY requirements?

 

[mk2_craig]

I agree with pretty much all of what has been said here.

I have always sold to either friends/family/collegues who I know are reasonable people, even though I've often taken a hit on the price, but have always stated ALL the flaws with the vehicle and that I don't want to know if there is a problem after money has changed hands.

 

In general I concur. I offloaded my Mondeo to a colleague's girlfriend, which I then instantly regretted as I became paranoid that the front wishbones that had been an MOT advisory for years/original 90k mile exhaust-clutch-battery-etc would come back and bite me on the arse - nearly 2yrs on and no feedback whatsoever though.

 

I recently found myself in the position of deciding to offload two 1988 Sierras, which were causing a fair bit of domestic grief. The first one was easy enough - donated to a friend who wanted it solely for the 205 Pinto block, and whose responsibility it was to get the car off my property which he eventually did via a flatbed despite turning up earlier that day expecting to drive it in the full knowledge that it had no radiator.

 

The second unfortunately was a very early Sapphire Cosworth that had been laid up for 5 years before I bought it six months earlier. Although standard looking it had received various engine modifications during the 1990s the precise detail of which had been lost in the mists of time. Having realised that it had the potential to be harder to get rid of than a time-served NPower doorstep saleswoman I lucked out when a chance comment by my parents to my sister's ex led to him snapping my arm off for it and taking it as far away as possible (Cumbria), even if I did have to get the sodding head gasket expensively changed a week before it was collected.

 

Thank f*ck I never got to the stage of advertising it locally and dealing with a never ending line of 19 year old test pilots - I think the stress of that could have eliminated what little sanity I had left at the time

[DCLane]

I've generally been OK

 

On eBay - sold about 6 cars, only one had the buyer complaining slightly afterwards. And that one was being sold for someone else.

 

Sold a couple through Retro Rides - all OK.

 

Also I still use Autotrader, but not as much.

 

Going to have SWMBO's Zafira up for sale in the new year (probably) and I'll use eBay as that's probably the best route for a sub-£1000 Zafira.

[Cavcraft]

You really can see why people weight stuff in can't you? Three enquiries about my Celica so far, everyone a fucking a waste of space.

[Polystratus]

You really can see why people weight stuff in can't you? Three enquiries about my Celica so far, everyone a fucking a waste of space.

 

Let me see - 'What's the least you'll sell it for', Would you swap for MK5 Escort', '£50 M8 collect tomorrow'

[gearoil]

apparently the scum who bought it had done an armed robbery at Jewsons in Swindon.

 

Right!! Everybody on the fucking floor!!

 

Wheres the 12mm ply... NOW!!

 

Clowns

[eddyramrod]

apparently the scum who bought it had done an armed robbery at Jewsons in Swindon.

 

Right!! Everybody on the fucking floor!!

 

Wheres the 12mm ply... NOW!!

 

Clowns

 

I might be able to stop laughing in a week or two, priceless!

[meggersdog]

has anyone else googled the phone number of prospective buyers.

[Cavcraft]

You really can see why people weight stuff in can't you? Three enquiries about my Celica so far, everyone a fucking a waste of space.

 

Let me see - 'What's the least you'll sell it for', Would you swap for MK5 Escort', '£50 M8 collect tomorrow'

 

Aye, along with the offer of a swap with a car in Norfolk as long as I deliver. Despite the fact I said 'collection only, I cannot deliver'

[richardthestag]

I have sold a few and generally go by the following rules to save pain.

• [*:2y3tlqor]Always be polite to their face, remember they know where you live!!!
  [*:2y3tlqor]On the phone if they can’t string a sentence together – sorry mon brave already sold
  [*:2y3tlqor]Never ever hold the car for anyone until a non refundable cash deposit is in my hands and make sure that the car is back on the market by a pre specified mutually agreed date if they subsequently no show. I’ve had the bastards say just nipping down the cash point and be back in 5 mins and no show. By which time you have told 5 other callers that it is sold.
  [*:2y3tlqor]When calling to org a viewing I always ask for the buyers phone number – refusal = hang up, wasted too many nights waiting for useless no show twats.
  [*:2y3tlqor]If they turn up with their extended family ready to crawl all over the car – lock it and walk away.
  [*:2y3tlqor]Offer a shadow of what the fuel in the tank is worth – lock it and walk away
  [*:2y3tlqor]Some call every 15 mins upping their offer by an aryton. – tell em it sold for the asking and hang up.
  [*:2y3tlqor]Even though I put no traders, shitehawks or other wankers in the ad – still get the “we have somebody who want to buy your car but you need to register with us first.†– tell them you are taking a dump and ask them to call back later – they rarely do. Or try and sell them your garden shed until they hang up.
  [*:2y3tlqor]Reply to essay requests via e-mail with your mobile / premium rate number and invite them to discuss over the phone. Most of them are complete time wasters if they are really interested they will show up.
  [*:2y3tlqor]Cash only, only take a draft if I go with them to the bank and see the cashier hand it to them (been bitten with this) and definitely no paypal...
  [*:2y3tlqor]Drivers licence and proof of insurance for any test drive and note details for any post sales shenanigans so I have some fall back. Test pilots and idiots may get the “free-ad for rusty Mk1 Golf, FREE - call any time night or day†treatment.