The grumpy thread

[pogweasel]

Pompei - probably best you don't watch the video to Eminem's Stan then, where that's exactly what happens to Dido...

If only someone would do it for real. That would be a day for celebration.

[Guest]

Pompei - probably best you don't watch the video to Eminem's Stan then, where that's exactly what happens to Dido...

If only someone would do it for real. That would be a day for celebration.

 

'My tea's gone cold I'm wondering why.....'

 

Because you're at the bottom of the Mersey, my love. Don't hurry back.

[Cavcraft]

You know what if I could get the boot to open on the Passat I'd be tempted to re-enact that scene complete with a gaffer taped up missus. Mind you I wouldn't need to drive in to the river Gowy as she'd drown in the footwells of the hopeless heap of junk anyhow.

 

I'd like to see Eminem sing about a mental woman found drowned on the floor of a knackered VW.

[Guest]

 

I'd like to see Eminem sing about a mental woman found drowned on the floor of a knackered VW.

 

I'd crash the bastard into a dehumidifier factory just to make absolutely sure. Perhaps you can start a new Dub modifying trend - 'OMG THANK YOU DEATH OEM +' - look.

[Cavcraft]

 

I'd like to see Eminem sing about a mental woman found drowned on the floor of a knackered VW.

 

I'd crash the bastard into a dehumidifier factory just to make absolutely sure. Perhaps you can start a new Dub modifying trend - 'OMG THANK YOU DEATH OEM +' - look.

 

[eddyramrod]

I'm detecting a mysogynistic turn here, and as a heterosexual man who likes the scary creatures with the bumps in front, I think it's likely to add to, if not grump, then certainly my niggle-at-life factor.

 

And yeah, I've seen Get Carter, shame about that Sunbeam...

[Cavcraft]

I'm not a mysogynist*, I married a woman.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

*In fact to further prove this point I bought her two Chrimbo pressies. I got her a pair of slippers and a vibrator. Thus if she doesn't like the slippers she can go and f*ck herself.

[eddyramrod]

I'm not a mysogynist*, I married a woman.

 

That proves nothing, you could have done it for spite...

[Cavcraft]

I'm not a mysogynist*, I married a woman.

 

That proves nothing, you could have done it for spite...

 

One of us did and it wasn't me.

 

 

 

Back to grumpy the cost of diesel is a rip-off. £1.35 per litre at the one of the local extortionists. Time for a trip to Aldi/Lidl/whichever mingebag's paradise sells the cheapest cooking oil methinks

[dollywobbler]

I am increasingly bored of people phoning, calling round and emailing to "see if anything's happened" or "are you in labour yet?".

 

Some pramshite. How about getting one of these?

 

 

Hint of 2CV about those swoopy lines?

 

That's brilliant. Sadly, Ms 2CV has not been on the airwaves for over a day now, so she might miss this. Perhaps it's happened!

[trigger]

My Bora failed it's mot today Fortunately it's just two front tires so it's not to bad, They never noticed the noisy front wheel bearing, Knocking top suspension mount or split CV boots!, I'm still getting it all repaired though whilst it's at the garage.

[messerschmitt owner]

 

 

Back to grumpy the cost of diesel is a rip-off. £1.35 per litre at the one of the local extortionists. Time for a trip to Aldi/Lidl/whichever mingebag's paradise sells the cheapest cooking oil methinks

ha ha ha ha

 

Cooking oil is more expensive than diesel just now - grump, grump, grump!

[wuvvum]

Tesco's veg oil is £1.04 for a litre bottle at the moment. Oddly, the three-litre bottles are £3.94.

[Guest Leonard Hatred]

Waste vegetable oil FTW.

[Lord Sterling]

Life man, life is just 5h1t at the moment. No car, trying to find any available work without success, no money, I feel like I'm gonna go off the wall.

 

Speaking of off the wall, towel rail has decided to take leave off the wall today.

[warren t claim]

I managed to be a prick and hurt my back jumping off the back of a trailer.

[autofive]

Tesco's veg oil is £1.04 for a litre bottle at the moment. Oddly, the three-litre bottles are £3.94.

 

i noticed this too when looking for oil for the frying pan, i assumed it was old stock, but one litre i bought had a 1212 use by date

[scaryoldcortina]

Tescos and Asda are GR7 for stupid pricing. I was in tesco buying handwash this afternoon, pump dispenser with 500ml of antibacterial handwash, 55p. Next to it, refills which are the same thing without the pump bit... 70p. I wonder how many refills they sell?

[Richard]

Cooking oil prices are index-linked to diesel prices.

[Guest Leonard Hatred]

Aye. It happened the last time fossil fuels were at this price level.

[chaseracer]

On the subject of bundling a woman in the boot, one of the most chilling moments in cinema is in Get Carter where the car with the girl in the boot is pushed into the Tyne ...

 

A sad end to a decent looking Sunbeam Alpine as well; apparently the film crew had to remove the engine transmission and all potentially toxic parts before dumping it in the drink...

Which is odd, considering the state of the river back then - the Alpine probably dissolved within minutes

 

Even when I lived in the Toon 15 or so years after GC was made (place hadn't changed much...) the joke was that, if you fell in, you wouldn't last long enough to drown...

[Doctormop]

Wasn't there an olympic bid from Newcastle back in 1988; Winner of the swimming events was the furthest one up the Tyne without a stomach pump..

[The Moog]

Aye. It happened the last time fossil fuels were at this price level.

 

Current best I can find is Makro with KTC at 18 odd quid for 20 litres.

[trigger]

Having IVF treatment and wanking into a cup is making me grumpy this morning.

[wuvvum]

Cheers for that Trig. That'll teach me to read Autoshite whilst eating my lunch...

[warren t claim]

Having IVF treatment and wanking into a cup is making me grumpy this morning.

 

Couldn't Mrs_Trig give you a hand?

 

Best of luck with the treatment, I hope it's successfully.

[Angrydicky]

Good luck Trigster.

[trigger]

Cheers for that Trig. That'll teach me to read Autoshite whilst eating my lunch...

 

Sorry!.

 

Cheers Warren, Sadly Mrs Trig gets dragged into theater to have her eggs removed whilst i get sent into a room marked as private with a cup in hand to do the deed so she can't help, Thank god for smartphones with internet!.

 

It's the second attempt we have had now and the signs are looking for positive this time, better egg collection etc, It's not a very nice experance though, Mrs Trigger's constantly apologising for putting me though it all but it's one of those things, Pisses you off though when you see people with children who can't look after them or don't want them but that's life i guess.

 

The worse thing about it is that 20 minutes before you go into the "private" room for your wank you just know that the big fat bloke in the room next to you was in there knocking one out in that same chair!

[Pete-M]

Tradex = Wankers.

 

Renewed my insurance LAST JANUARY and I'm still waiting for the actual policy to arrive. Last time I had a cover note was September to go to Europeland, and even that was a disaster to get my hands on. Ended up getting them to email, fax, and post cover notes to me so I could still catch the ferry on time.

 

Now it's renewal time they've decided, all of a sudden, that the Jag is a sports car and they want extra money to cover it. They're also being a bit uppity about my job, which is insurance related so they're taking the piss a bit there as well. 99% of the work I do is for insurance companies, and without the likes of me they'd have a much harder time of it. Still, they reckon it's worth a premium hike. Cheeky bastards.

[myglaren]

Re: ^, my daughter insured through KwikFit and received her insurance certificate by email five minutes later.

 

Took my C5 in to the garage near work on Thursday, went to collect it at 16:30 on leaving work and it was still on the lift, no wheels on.

The handbrake cables they had bought turned out to be unsuitable.

I left the car there and went to take a bus home. Walked two miles to get to a suitable bus stop, realised I'd been looking for the wrong bus (W2 instead of M2/3).

Got home and as I approached the door realised my keys were in the car

Thought "never mind, I'll go to Annika's" Annika - my eldest daughter, lives 100 yards from me.

It was she who had bought the Civic last Sunday and was out in it, expected she would be home soon with her kids, wandered up the street and bought fish'n chips, wandered around some more eating them and passing my house to see if my son was up (works nights).

Annika arrived home at 20:50, sat down with a cup of very welcome tea after walking about 20 miles and got a message on the mobile that son was now awake. Got home at 21:30 more buggered than a buggered thing and with the prospect of having to take the bus again this morning while not being very bus-aware.

Would normally have got a lift from Bob but he smokes in his car so I can't get in it.

Bus worked OK. Bob arrived home at 7:10 and let me out, bus arrived at 7:22 and was in Birtley by 7:50. Jumped off and the bus, in contradiction to my expectations, turned right and towards work, so I could have had a four minute walk on my protesting feet and legs, instead of the ten minute one.

Couldn't get in to clock on as there were smokers congregated at every single entrance, so just never bothered with the clocking on bit.

10:40 and someone smoking in the toilets, smoke drifting into the factory so I scuttled out the back door but too late, spent half an hour coughing and trying to breathe, finally threw up all over myself, said Sod It and walked out. Called for the car but the new handbrake cables had only just arrived. Took another bus home after three failed to appear, went in the bath, fell asleep, woke at 15:30, chucked on some clothes and ran for the bus to get the car before they closed.

Alighted from the bus into a cloud of smoke in the bus shelter Just wonderful.

Car was ready-ish I discovered when I managed to speak to them through the coughing and wheezing but a caliper is apparently buggered so back next week for a new caliper.

Tried to drive off and the brake is seized on again Drove home doing 'emergency stops' where able to free the blasted thing off before the new pads are burned down to the backing plates.

Just taken the youngest daughter to her mates in it and she was drenched in perfume, had to drive with all the windows open and the blower on full.

TGIF.