The grumpy thread

[chodweaver]

Why oh why do I only ever hurt myself when I am preparing something to do with health and safety? Split my finger open sticking up a sign about excessive noise... I mean... Ffs!

You are not alone. My last employer was large enough to have an H&S officer. And he made a vid for internal use warning about trip hazards from electrical cables.

 

He broke three ribs making the film.

 

His fall made the final cut though...

[GrumpiusMaximus]

Why oh why do I only ever hurt myself when I am preparing something to do with health and safety? Split my finger open sticking up a sign about excessive noise... I mean... Ffs!

 

 

I once cut myself on a first aid box.  Doing an inspection of the contents of first aid boxes.  I only noticed when my boss turned around and told me my thumb was bleeding quite badly...

[Crispian_J_Hotson]

It happens all the time. Pisses me off it does. I got a nail dragged through my skin off a piece of skirting that I was picking up to show people that the nails need to be bent over or took out. Paper cuts from all the filing, a stapler incident, and that fucking hole I slipped down putting up a barrier for... You guessed it... THE HOLE! 

 

You honestly couldn't write this shit sometimes.

[Lacquer Peel]

When did Norwich become so car unfriendly?

 

Last time I was there is was easy enough to navigate.

 

It's a fucking nightmare now.

 

The on street parking,when you can find it is a fucking rip off too.

 

Cunts whoever thought it was a good idea to do that to the city.

People forget that traders need access to Dixons.

[GrumpiusMaximus]

People forget that traders need access to Dixons.

 

 

'That was Big Yellow Taxi by Joni Mitchell, a song in which Joni complains they paved paradise to put up a parking lot, a measure which actually would have alleviated traffic congestion on the outskirts of paradise, something which Joni singularly fails to point out, perhaps because it doesn't quite fit in with her blinkered view of the World.'

 

'Nevertheless.  Nice song.'

[chaseracer]

Aha.

[Lord Sterling]

Aha.

Yeah, they were a pretty good group from the 80s. I particularly liked thier their song "Take on me"

[Snipes]

Dan!

[GrumpiusMaximus]

DAN!

[Snipes]

DAN! He can't hear me. DAN!

[MikeR]

It was only a guess. Don't know about the recent crash, just live in a town full of old buffers for whom driverless cars will be introduced too late.

 

because of the drivers in our town , I have just covered the front bonnet over the headlights in 6 inch wide yellow tape .....2 big yellow eyebrows !!

 

its made a few look twice so far !!

 

hopefully I dont have to use words like "f****** old f***w** etc   as much ...

[mercrocker]

Taping over the tops of headlamps was routine servicing on Anglias and Minors.....Fuckers still used to pull out, tho.

[Datsuncog]

Went out for a sandwich with colleagues at lunchtime before going to get a few groceries. Usually I have a cup soup or rice cakes at my desk, but I thought I'd push the boat out a little.

 

Came back with a sack of croissants, a massive tub of sweeties, some potatoes, a dozen back-issues of 2000AD and a hardback book about Ed Roth and the rise of pinstriping in the US custom car scene.

 

This is why I don't usually drink at lunchtime.

[The_Equalizer]

Went out for a sandwich with colleagues at lunchtime before going to get a few groceries. Usually I have a cup soup or rice cakes at my desk, but I thought I'd push the boat out a little.

 

Came back with a sack of croissants, a massive tub of sweeties, some potatoes, a dozen back-issues of 2000AD and a hardback book about Ed Roth and the rise of pinstriping in the US custom car scene.

 

This is why I don't usually drink at lunchtime.

 

Makes me wonder what happens when you have a drink of an evening?

[Datsuncog]

Heh, if it's not physically in front of me, it's not a problem... I'm afraid I've no hilarious 'drunk Ebay puchase' stories to relate!

 

But in an actual shop, following a mere pint of IPA, I become a bit of a gimme-pig... curious how such a low amount of alcohol can suppress my self-control by quite some amount.

 

 

Anyone want a book on pinstriping?

 

 

(I am a lightweight these days, I know)

[AMC Rebel]

, I become a bit of a gimme-pig.

 

 

Stealing that!

[Supernaut]

Filling in an application for an apprenticeship with the Forestry Commission.

 

Bloody hell, Civil Service application forms are something else. I've got to write about key competencies. There is a 40+ page guide on these and what you need to write about, and the exact wording you need to use etc. etc.

 

I'm struggling, however the closing date is early November, so plenty of time to get my head round it.

[GrumpiusMaximus]

Filling in an application for an apprenticeship with the Forestry Commission.

 

Bloody hell, Civil Service application forms are something else. I've got to write about key competencies. There is a 40+ page guide on these and what you need to write about, and the exact wording you need to use etc. etc.

 

I'm struggling, however the closing date is early November, so plenty of time to get my head round it.

Have you got a degree mate? I’m only asking because there’s currently a £26,000 bursary to train as a Computer Science teacher.

 

Ask me how I know...

[xtriple]

Been to the park with the mutts, took Besse (the Colie pup) and her owner, Ron. I had forgotten just what a thoroughly irritating bloke he is! He says the same thing over and over again, takes forever to get in/out of the car, shouts at the dog constantly for moving around and bangs the door into the car parked beside us.

 

what a twat I am for agreeing to do this yet again.

[alcyonecorporation]

Been to the park with the mutts, took Besse (the Colie pup) and her owner, Ron. I had forgotten just what a thoroughly irritating bloke he is! He says the same thing over and over again, takes forever to get in/out of the car, shouts at the dog constantly for moving around and bangs the door into the car parked beside us.

 

what a twat I am for agreeing to do this yet again.

Please spend time with nicer people. I'm getting annoyed with the people you spend time with, and I'm not even you!

[Supernaut]

Have you got a degree mate? I’m only asking because there’s currently a £26,000 bursary to train as a Computer Science teacher.

 

Ask me how I know...

Yes, I have a degree.

 

However I'm trying to get out of IT!

[Guest Hooli]

Teachers never know anything about IT. You'll be well out if it!

[Fumbler]

House alarm decided it wanted to sound so the second keypad in the loft went into tamper condition. That had mother in a tizwoz for a nice amount of time. Thank goodness for memory recall.

[GrumpiusMaximus]

Yes, I have a degree.

 

However I'm trying to get out of IT!

True but in this case at least you won’t have to be the one walking 3/4 of a mile to plug a mouse in!

[cobblers]

Walking down the street just now I heard a screech noise in the distance and revving diesel engine - A flatbed transit with a load of smoke behind it coming up the road towards me.

 

As it gets closer I see that the front drivers side wheel is locked solid with sparks coming off it, and the dimwit is just carrying on.

 

Just as it drew level with me the tyre exploded, firing bits of rubber and shit all up the side of the mrs's car and making my ears ring.

 

Bloke just carries on driving.

[Guest Hooli]

I wouldn't argue with anyone doing that, they must be bloody strong to hold the wheel straight.

[anonymous user]

I am a terrible passenger, been in car today with someone I normally get on very well with, but his driving drove me up the wall. No looking ahead (I had to stamp on my imaginary brake as we accelerated towards a queue of stationary cars). Wrong gear (are we going to stay in fourth, when there are two more gears to go, can't you hear the engine screaming?) Making reasonable progress, but then catching something up and just sitting behind it, too close, for mile after mile, instead of passing. This was mainly on the M4, I have got home more knackered than if I had driven. And let's not forget not putting enough fuel in to get there and back, so two petrol stops.

[Guest Hooli]

I am a terrible passenger, been in car today with someone I normally get on very well with, but his driving drove me up the wall. No looking ahead (I had to stamp on my imaginary brake as we accelerated towards a queue of stationary cars). Wrong gear (are we going to stay in fourth, when there are two more gears to go, can't you hear the engine screaming?) Making reasonable progress, but then catching something up and just sitting behind it, too close, for mile after mile, instead of passing. This was mainly on the M4, I have got home more knackered than if I had driven. And let's not forget not putting enough fuel in to get there and back, so two petrol stops.

 

You sound like me with most other drivers, how do they manage to do something so easy so badly without realising?

[Christine]

Started my somewhat neglected vw T4 tonight , drove down the drive ,and there's a regular thwacking noise . Stop , rev the engine and the thwacking increases with revs .Instantly switch off... AS THE CAMBELT IS AT 90K AND 11 YEARS OLD !!     ....

I know that,   as it's written in tippex on the cover .I noticed it when i topped up the washer bottle  the other day    . Ooops I'll get that done I thought....

 

Upon further investigation ,not the cambelt , its the washing machine belt driving the alternator and then power steering pump .. shredded , and taken some sound proofing off too, flaying around . Got a knife and cut the bits off and it survived driving home 10 miles ..That's good,  as they're only a tenner or so ... Apart from minor cracking and fraying I pretended i didn't see , the cambelt is fine  for now !!!

[DVee8]

It's that time of year..The fireworks have started.

 

Give it a rest man..