Grotty old Bentley Eight - should I?

[motorpunk]

I stumbled across this, dumped on a grubby industrial estate near where I live. I suspect it’s an MOT fail from a little garage nearby who have a habit of parking/dumping shite around the place. No history on the plate and it looks like it has been there years and years. Doesn’t look damp inside, no obvious major grot, suspension looks wonky but it’s parked on lots of rubbish which doesn’t help. Doesn’t look damp inside (hard to tell), wood looks crap and seats tired. 

I have three cars already and am stuck in self-isolation for 2 weeks. I have no skills, no money and no brain. The only possible use I have for this is as cheap runaround for my daughter who only has 1 years NCB and lives in a rough part of Nottingham with no parking. Or I could just waft around like a predatory ‘70s DJ. Or do a trackday in it. Or ship it to the US to do Lemons (on my bucket list). Or fuck knows what.

I’ll go and see what the story is. Before I do, any suggestions, tips, ideas?

[Amishtat]

Personally I wouldn't even entertain the idea. This isn't a criticism of you, I don't have any money or skills either but you'll soon find you've even less of one if you end up with that. It all depends on the price in the end but I reckon it's possibly worth more as a breaker than a car. 

Edited March 18, 2020 by Amishtat

[Stanky]

Paging @xtriple, @xtriple to the front desk please.

[Kiltox]

GIFB

[DavidB]

That’s like Jimmy Saville offering you £20000 but he has his cock torn through the middle of the wad.

[C1am]

How long would it survive in your daughter's area?

[Zelandeth]

No money...then no.  Run away.

An overhaul of the front brakes alone can run into four figures...never mind anything else.

They are biblically expensive to sort, and let's not forget that they enjoy rusting too.

There's inevitably a reason it was parked up in the first place too.

[Asimo]

I have bought things just for the fun of taking them to pieces. And then binning the remains / keeping the useful bits. Not as a "breaker", just for fun.

But I wouldn't bother to buy this to breaker money unless it is extremely cheap. There are so many of these old barges in the same state, and so few people running  them, that there can be little market left for parts.

And if you want one to drive, buy one that works. (It will break tomorrow. Probably.)

[vulgalour]

Cheap luxury cars are always very expensive to own.

[Tamworthbay]

11 minutes ago, Zelandeth said:

No money...then no.  Run away.

An overhaul of the front brakes alone can run into four figures...never mind anything else.

They are biblically expensive to sort, and let's not forget that they enjoy rusting too.

There's inevitably a reason it was parked up in the first place too.

Didn’t Xtriple end up paying hundreds just to have the discs skimmed? I am sure it was something crazy like £2k for a new of discs and pads.

[ETCHY]

Just take the quick route, instead of buying the Bentley, pile any money you have up & burn it ?. 

You cannot run any Bentley cheap & a shagged one will just be a total money pit.

[Kiltox]

52 minutes ago, Amishtat said:

GIFB

 

43 minutes ago, DavidB said:

GIFB

 

35 minutes ago, C1am said:

GIFB

 

32 minutes ago, Zelandeth said:

GIFB

 

22 minutes ago, Asimo said:

GIFB

 

20 minutes ago, vulgalour said:

GIFB

 

20 minutes ago, Tamworthbay said:

GIFB

 

10 minutes ago, ETCHY said:

GIFB

Looks pretty unanimous to me 

[motorpunk]

Bloody hell. I didn’t expect such sensible responses! 

I was thinking hooky MOT and spend not a single penny on anything other than petrol and the essentials of making it go. Flog a few mag features to make it pay for itself, then fly-tip it somewhere. Or summat. I dunno, inspire me.

[motorpunk]

39 minutes ago, C1am said:

How long would it survive in your daughter's area?

St Annes in Nottingham? Seconds.

[NorthernMonkey]

8 minutes ago, motorpunk said:

Bloody hell. I didn’t expect such sensible responses! 

I was thinking hooky MOT and spend not a single penny on anything other than petrol and the essentials of making it go. Flog a few mag features to make it pay for itself, then fly-tip it somewhere. Or summat. I dunno, inspire me.

Excellent plan. 
 

I’ll send you the postcode of my yard for fly tipping purposes ?

[BorniteIdentity]

34 minutes ago, motorpunk said:

Bloody hell. I didn’t expect such sensible responses! 

I was thinking hooky MOT and spend not a single penny on anything other than petrol and the essentials of making it go. Flog a few mag features to make it pay for itself, then fly-tip it somewhere. Or summat. I dunno, inspire me.

Naughty MOTs are one thing, but ignoring all faults is another thing entirely. It would bug the shit out of me being surrounded by all that potential but being burdened by years of minimal investment and mingebag ownership.

It’s most probable that people who can ignore faults enjoy life more than I do. But I couldn’t do it. 

 

[outlaw118]

I've had similar thought, and I've done some pretty stupid things in my life, but not this.

Whilst getting a hooky MoT may be a plan, I'd recommend breakdown cover as the next big expense - that is if it'll move under it's own power at all.

 

If you manage to get it for silly money and spend your 2 weeks of isolation stripping the good bits off, I'm sure a banger racer will have the shell.

[motorpunk]

11 minutes ago, BorniteIdentity said:

Naughty MOTs are one thing, but ignoring all faults is another thing entirely. It would bug the shit out of me being surrounded by all that potential but being burdened by years of minimal investment and mingebag ownership.

It’s most probable that people who can ignore faults enjoy life more than I do. But I couldn’t do it. 

 

Yeah, I understand your logic. I’ve learned to embrace the ‘managed retreat’ technique of owning shite; doing the minimum, treating it as ‘just a car’, enjoying the shiteness. It’s hard if/when you get attached, my old Fiat 500 is becoming a bit of a garage queen..

[Amishtat]

2 minutes ago, outlaw118 said:

I've had similar thought, and I've done some pretty stupid things in my life, but not this.

Whilst getting a hooky MoT may be a plan, I'd recommend breakdown cover as the next big expense - that is if it'll move under it's own power at all.

 

If you manage to get it for silly money and spend your 2 weeks of isolation stripping the good bits off, I'm sure a banger racer will have the shell.

This. Don't forget to take the engine too, that'll end up with a 2.8 in. Sorry to sound negative, it's your decision in the end. 

[lesapandre]

I had one. The rear suspension is a hydraulic system - the brakes use a servo-ed high pressure system too. Malfunction in either makes the cars undrivable. The brakes lock on and the rear end, as in this, sags. They are big and heavy and need care.

They run hydraulic tappets which can stick with disuse. If it needs engine work it really is unviable unless you have the skills.

If you have a big workshop and you are in no hurry its something to tinker with but parts are £££. They aren't really cheap and cheerful ever.

[motorpunk]

Aw, man

[ETCHY]

On the other hand if you're self isolating, it  does have leather & picnic tables - potential self isolation holiday home at the end of the drive !??

[lesapandre]

Yes as a funky garden shed would be useful.

[sierraman]

Get it bought. Cash in whatever funds you have, if necessary get a pay day loan, just get it bought. 

[motorpunk]

Just for the sake of debate, now, you (mostly) sensible people; how much work would it be to bin off the hydrosnot fancy suspension and stick it on cheapo coils? And same for brakes, about which I know very little, admittedly, could one not just stuff originality and put a servo, pipes, discs and pads from some other hefty machine instead? Can someone plausible please lie to me about how this would be £250 and a days work, please?

[lesapandre]

That's like having Concord and putting prop engines on it - both were developed in the 50-60's. 

You are describing the Rolls Silver Cloud - now one of those is worth a punt - chassis built and less complex. They for that reason are a better bet...but they retain their value more.

[HMC]

As we know all too well presently; life is short.

Why not?? I must however insist that the dreadful “VIP” plate is ditched, it has no place on that. It’s not a wannabe / try hard mode of transport, a shabby roller/ bentley is more I Couldn't give a fuck, to my mind at least.

Being disheveled behind the wheel should be mandatory; I hope you can manage that. I could without much effort at all.

 

[Macscrooge]

Run fast, run far. So I expect you’ll buy it then...

[panhard65]

I don't bother posting here any more but what a load of bollocks. That will sell for a grand plus all day long no matter what is wrong with it. The brakes are not some amazing mystical thing just citroen inspired and really not hard. Just fix them properly and forget fitting other parts these fuckers weigh 2 and a half ton and have 4 calipers on the front alone.  The list on the rear is likely to be rear trailing arms rotting through which you can get repair parts for. They do have the ability to suck up large amounts of cash if you have to pay "specialists" Try the Aussie RR clubs as they have lists for alternative cheaper parts that just tends not to be available in the uk. They are lovely old things and well worth owning one just once. Ignore all the idiots grow some balls and get it bought

[sutty2006]

Buy it. 
 

 

chuck a 6BT in it and crack on.