The Great Roof Race (TM)

[Jim Bell]

Before anyone asks, the answer is yes.

 

Yes I have nothing better to do on Christmas Day.

 

 

But what could BE better?!

 

Everyone loves a race, so let's squint a twist on it.

 

It's winter. Have you got a cabriolet?

 

It's cold. How fast can YOU get your hinges flexing and your top off and then back on.

 

Well let's literally find out.

 

Rules are explained below by a fat lad that's gets puffed out tiptoeing round a tiny car.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Current leaderboard:

 

1.Scaryoldcortina* - 18 seconds.

(MGTF manual, with hoodie up)

 

2.Brown Nova - 30 seconds.

(MX5 manual. With hat)

 

3.Fordperv - 49 seconds.

(Mk5 Escort electric, with LOVELY GIFT hat.)

 

4. WilsonShitpeas - 1:09

(SLK Electric. With Hat.)

 

5. Angle - 1:18

(Condemned Saab 900 Electric. With last minute hat.)

 

6. Jazoli - 1:20

(Peugeot 307 electric. With hat. Walking pace.

 

7. GM - 2:08

(MX5 MK1 HARD TOP manually laboured on and off. With hat and soundtrack).

 

8.

 

9.

 

10. Ohdearme - 1:33.

(Manual AND Electric. No roof, no hat, windows only.)

[Jim Bell]

The first contestant enters the arena. Steed is an SLK.

 

 

 

Let's see how it goes.

 

 

 

 

 

I make that 1:09 as the time to beat.

[Jim Bell]

Aftermath. The more astute of you may have noticed me attempting mid race repairs.

 

 

[Tickman]

What a genius game.

 

I don't have a convertible

[somewhatfoolish]

Have the neighbours called the white coated ones with the big butterfly nets yet?

[John F]

Difficult, but not impossible, to masturbate to...

[Jim Bell]

Well you'll not make it onto the forthcoming leaderboard with an attitude like that cheif.

[Jim Bell]

Difficult, but not impossible, to masturbate to...

If I'd known you were gonna try I would have taken my hat off near the end.

[John F]

TBF I'd need an angle grinder & a long extension to even participate.

[Jim Bell]

TBF I'd need an angle grinder & a long extension to even participate.

To masturbate?!

[somewhatfoolish]

To masturbate?!

It could be a thing.

 

[John F]

To masturbate?!

 

Don't judge me.

[Cavcraft]

Judge you? He's probably got a prize in his boot for you. You'll have to bend over to retrieve it, mind.

[John F]

Hehe!

[dome]

I'm overstocked in roofless cars

 

I've just sold one (black MR2), one smokes worse than a beagle in a lab( red MR2) and one is sorned and I'm not that fecking brave(Locost)

[Eddie Honda]

I'd phone a friend to do this on my behalf, but as the driver's windae is knackered, it's probably not a good idea.

[gadgetgricey]

I just hope there was a kid on th car park asking "Mum, why has that man just run round his car".

"Oh, he's a member of autoshite dear".

 

 

If ever there was an incentive for me to get the Saab back on the road, this is it.....

[Jim Bell]

 

one smokes worse than a beagle in a lab( red MR2)

I bet the roof doesn't smoke.

 

Or are you just Chicken, McFly?

[Jim Bell]

 

 

If ever there was an incentive for me to get the Saab back on the road, this is it.....

It doesn't even have to be on the road! That's one of the benefits and perculiarities of roof racing; you can do it in a garage.

(As long as you're nimble and can still complete a circuit of the vehicle via the bonnet).

[Pillock]

If I still had the MGF I'd batter 1:09 into a hatted cock.

I reckon sub 20s with only mild dislocation of shoulder.

[Jim Bell]

If I still had the MGF I'd batter 1:09 into a hatted cock.

I reckon sub 20s with only mild dislocation of shoulder.

In the Roof Race community we call this kind of empty boast a 'Hartop Charlie Wet Fart'.

[LightBulbFun]

in b4 someone with a 2CV shows up

 

(or an invacar with all the roof bolts pre removed  )

[Pillock]

In the Roof Race community we call this kind of empty boast a 'Hartop Charlie Wet Fart'.

I don't know who Charlie is but I doubt he's had as many sprouts as me.

[mercrocker]

I cannot compete.....My cars are all tin ceiling.   I did consider submitting a late 190E sunroof entry but remembered the bastard stuck halfway last time I used it.   

[tooSavvy]

To masturbate?!

.... whizzing back my 'MoonRoof' qualifies as 'leaping off at Gateshead, not travelling into the Toon'.. ??

[loserone]

I don't know who Charlie is but I doubt he's had as many sprouts as me.

Quite right, but he had a lot of beans yesterday and he hasn't had a go in Jim's Merc yet.

[DVee8]

I don't have a floppy,but i do have a large sunroof does that count?

[Jim Bell]

I don't have a floppy,but i do have a large sunroof does that count?

 

 

Maybe in the third division.  Not in the PREMIERSHIP.

[Skizzer]

I’m game but I’m currently about 900 miles away from my only floppy top. You’ll have to wait a couple of days, possibly more by the time I’ve got the powered roof motor greased and stuff. (Most likely quicker unpowered.)

 

All-round leccy windows is borderline cheating, by the way.

[spike60]

I dunno how much slower I would be but the Z3 leccy roof quick enough to do at the traffic lights. Bit matterless at the mo as it's 2 miles away with a hardtop bolted on.