Jim Bell Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 Before anyone asks, the answer is yes. Yes I have nothing better to do on Christmas Day. But what could BE better?! Everyone loves a race, so let's squint a twist on it. It's winter. Have you got a cabriolet? It's cold. How fast can YOU get your hinges flexing and your top off and then back on. Well let's literally find out. Rules are explained below by a fat lad that's gets puffed out tiptoeing round a tiny car. Current leaderboard: 1.Scaryoldcortina* - 18 seconds. (MGTF manual, with hoodie up) 2.Brown Nova - 30 seconds. (MX5 manual. With hat) 3.Fordperv - 49 seconds. (Mk5 Escort electric, with LOVELY GIFT hat.) 4. WilsonShitpeas - 1:09 (SLK Electric. With Hat.) 5. Angle - 1:18(Condemned Saab 900 Electric. With last minute hat.) 6. Jazoli - 1:20(Peugeot 307 electric. With hat. Walking pace. 7. GM - 2:08(MX5 MK1 HARD TOP manually laboured on and off. With hat and soundtrack). 8. 9. 10. Ohdearme - 1:33.(Manual AND Electric. No roof, no hat, windows only.) loserone, DeeJay, mrbenn and 12 others 15 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Bell Posted December 25, 2018 Author Share Posted December 25, 2018 The first contestant enters the arena. Steed is an SLK. Let's see how it goes. I make that 1:09 as the time to beat. Dick Longbridge, Kringle, John F and 14 others 17 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Bell Posted December 25, 2018 Author Share Posted December 25, 2018 Aftermath. The more astute of you may have noticed me attempting mid race repairs. beko1987 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tickman Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 What a genius game. I don't have a convertible Talbot and Jim Bell 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
somewhatfoolish Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 Have the neighbours called the white coated ones with the big butterfly nets yet? Aston Martin, Lacquer Peel, UltraWomble and 3 others 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John F Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 Difficult, but not impossible, to masturbate to... Ohdearme, gadgetgricey, beko1987 and 18 others 21 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Bell Posted December 25, 2018 Author Share Posted December 25, 2018 Well you'll not make it onto the forthcoming leaderboard with an attitude like that cheif. DeeJay 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Bell Posted December 25, 2018 Author Share Posted December 25, 2018 Difficult, but not impossible, to masturbate to...If I'd known you were gonna try I would have taken my hat off near the end. Skizzer, Aston Martin, Cavcraft and 8 others 11 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John F Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 TBF I'd need an angle grinder & a long extension to even participate. Christine 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Bell Posted December 25, 2018 Author Share Posted December 25, 2018 TBF I'd need an angle grinder & a long extension to even participate.To masturbate?! John F, billy_bunter, Cavcraft and 4 others 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
somewhatfoolish Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 To masturbate?!It could be a thing. Ohdearme and DeeJay 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John F Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 To masturbate?! Don't judge me. beko1987 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cavcraft Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 Judge you? He's probably got a prize in his boot for you. You'll have to bend over to retrieve it, mind. Fumbler and Jim Bell 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John F Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 Hehe! Cavcraft 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dome Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 I'm overstocked in roofless cars I've just sold one (black MR2), one smokes worse than a beagle in a lab( red MR2) and one is sorned and I'm not that fecking brave(Locost) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eddie Honda Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 I'd phone a friend to do this on my behalf, but as the driver's windae is knackered, it's probably not a good idea. Jim Bell 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gadgetgricey Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 I just hope there was a kid on th car park asking "Mum, why has that man just run round his car"."Oh, he's a member of autoshite dear". If ever there was an incentive for me to get the Saab back on the road, this is it..... Cavcraft and Ohdearme 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Bell Posted December 25, 2018 Author Share Posted December 25, 2018 one smokes worse than a beagle in a lab( red MR2)I bet the roof doesn't smoke. Or are you just Chicken, McFly? Aston Martin, bangernomics, twosmoke300 and 2 others 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Bell Posted December 25, 2018 Author Share Posted December 25, 2018 If ever there was an incentive for me to get the Saab back on the road, this is it.....It doesn't even have to be on the road! That's one of the benefits and perculiarities of roof racing; you can do it in a garage. (As long as you're nimble and can still complete a circuit of the vehicle via the bonnet). Cavcraft 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pillock Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 If I still had the MGF I'd batter 1:09 into a hatted cock.I reckon sub 20s with only mild dislocation of shoulder. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Bell Posted December 25, 2018 Author Share Posted December 25, 2018 If I still had the MGF I'd batter 1:09 into a hatted cock.I reckon sub 20s with only mild dislocation of shoulder.In the Roof Race community we call this kind of empty boast a 'Hartop Charlie Wet Fart'. DeeJay, GrumpiusMaximus and Dave_Q 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LightBulbFun Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 in b4 someone with a 2CV shows up (or an invacar with all the roof bolts pre removed ) Jim Bell 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pillock Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 In the Roof Race community we call this kind of empty boast a 'Hartop Charlie Wet Fart'.I don't know who Charlie is but I doubt he's had as many sprouts as me. Jim Bell 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mercrocker Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 I cannot compete.....My cars are all tin ceiling. I did consider submitting a late 190E sunroof entry but remembered the bastard stuck halfway last time I used it. Jim Bell 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tooSavvy Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 To masturbate?!.... whizzing back my 'MoonRoof' qualifies as 'leaping off at Gateshead, not travelling into the Toon'.. ?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
loserone Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 I don't know who Charlie is but I doubt he's had as many sprouts as me.Quite right, but he had a lot of beans yesterday and he hasn't had a go in Jim's Merc yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DVee8 Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 I don't have a floppy,but i do have a large sunroof does that count? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Bell Posted December 25, 2018 Author Share Posted December 25, 2018 I don't have a floppy,but i do have a large sunroof does that count? Maybe in the third division. Not in the PREMIERSHIP. Dave_Q and DVee8 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skizzer Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 I’m game but I’m currently about 900 miles away from my only floppy top. You’ll have to wait a couple of days, possibly more by the time I’ve got the powered roof motor greased and stuff. (Most likely quicker unpowered.) All-round leccy windows is borderline cheating, by the way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spike60 Posted December 25, 2018 Share Posted December 25, 2018 I dunno how much slower I would be but the Z3 leccy roof quick enough to do at the traffic lights. Bit matterless at the mo as it's 2 miles away with a hardtop bolted on. Jim Bell 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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