What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[hairnet]

wanted to go to a gig (been to same in worcester not long ago but shit has changed) so wasnt sure if up to it

but no band this time so stuff will be different 

and there was no local apart from selby which was sold out

didnt want to do scotland as atm HOW FUCKING FAR!!!!

and im not scared of a few miles (was only at menin gate two weeks ago ffs)

the sctsch were new galloway (been castle douglas for summat else)

dunkeld

or forres

i love the aberdeenshire/moray coast but dont fancy it from here in the car (proclaimers) and fly was more than @beko1987s tabs bill

and ive not been on a long trip like that for 12 months (irish shit doesnt count)

so dont wanna bike it

so rang selby as their site said no internet please ring (cos y'know - maybe)

no but we'll put ya on the list

that was at lunch time and thought feck it they might ring next week

so started planning for new galloway but avoiding the m6 (still with me - cool )

here to scouse boat to the titanic builders then do the stuff i missed in the maps down there (yeah i know but)

then stop then boat to cairnryan the next morning fart about and be at the gig in the evening then home the next day

but they rang me up at half 6 and said we have a ticket do ya...............

i said yes please before hed finished his sentence

oh and why do this?

the plain to abz was nearly 300 inverness not far off

the train was 150 quid and not even first class

even the train to dumfries is 80 and youre still 30 miles from the place with no transport - on a sunday yeah good luck with that

the ferry to scouse then scotland was 111 euros

oh and mileage? - to galloway 180 plus pottering each way

via ireland less than 100

dunkeld was 240 each way have done perth previous anyway and the place i wanted to stay wasnt available

thank you for listening

[DavieW]

14 hours ago, DavieW said:

Wife's work colleague occasionally gets some words wrong/mixed up and therefore comes out with some crackers. 

Yesterdays one: they have 5 new staff starting over the next month or so and she came out with "I didn't know the new starts were so intimate". My wife corrected her and told her the word she meant was "imminent". 

Another from a couple of weeks ago. 

"My mother-in-law is so erotic".  That surprised my wife for a bit until she realised she meant "neurotic".

[Metal Guru]

1 hour ago, DavieW said:

Another from a couple of weeks ago. 

"My mother-in-law is so erotic".  That surprised my wife for a bit until she realised she meant "neurotic".

No, that’s called a Freudian slip.

[myglaren]

 

[hairnet]

for anyone going on a collection this weekend

can i be jealous of your poo count

ta

[hairnet]

12 miles from x to an town

only the last small bit into the town has a limit so 15 mins?

cant use a train as it just doesnt

bus takes...............(not including the 20 mins to walk to the bus stop)

1 hour 24

the actual?

 

[beko1987]

1 hour ago, hairnet said:

for anyone going on a collection this weekend

can i be jealous of your poo count

ta

Treat yourself to a nice vindaloo 👌

[Remspoor]

5 minutes ago, beko1987 said:

Treat yourself to a nice vindaloo 👌

this.

[hairnet]

8 minutes ago, beko1987 said:

Treat yourself to a nice vindaloo 👌

im not that desperate/awash with money

its not a constipation issue - if i wanted to shit myself id find a small hole or a room with no lights

[hairnet]

RELIABLE HONDA ENGINE

 

[andy18s]

Must have been an AstraMax. . 

[320touring]

The Zoe has grown a pair...

[EyesWeldedShut]

Googling to find an old mate’s house and found this in one of their fields. Rich* farmers eh?

Less amusing is that my old school now has an athletics arena named in memory of their late Head of PE. He was a pupil there too - same class as me. He died aged 59. 
Carpe diem and all that.

 

[808 Estate]

[hairnet]

pointless celebrities

yes apart from claire balding and ross and christina trevanion 

no idea

but balding and friend on 147 after two goes

the question?

medal winning nations at 2022 world athletics

what can she cover sometimes?

athletics

called out on tv lmao

[hairnet]

commitments bbc2 in a bit

'

• Jimmy Rabbitte, Sr.: Is this the band then? Betcha U2 are shittin' themselves.

🤣

[hairnet]

grosse sex wee

15:47 and 19:46 

that beemer is the sex

[DavieW]

1 hour ago, hairnet said:

pointless celebrities

yes apart from claire balding and ross and christina trevanion 

no idea

but balding and friend on 147 after two goes

the question?

medal winning nations at 2022 world athletics

what can she cover sometimes?

athletics

called out on tv lmao

I always laugh when I see Pointless Celebrities on the TV listing - sums 99% of them up perfectly.

[Metal Guru]

3 hours ago, hairnet said:

pointless celebrities

yes apart from claire balding and ross and christina trevanion 

no idea

but balding and friend on 147 after two goes

the question?

medal winning nations at 2022 world athletics

what can she cover sometimes?

athletics

called out on tv lmao

3/8 “celebrities” you’ve heard of, is about normal for Pointless celebrities. Similar percentage for most celeb editions of normal shows.

[wuvvum]

Trundling down the A47 this morning, I was overtaken by a Volvo 164.

[DavieW]

When the sun's out, it's a bank holiday, it would be rude not to get the roof down and go for a wee breakfast run. 

 

[hairnet]

 

lol at the fire engine extending its ladder and theres a chap standing videoing or taking a photo and hes stood right in the not inconsiderate clag

[Quintus]

[myglaren]

[auntiemaryscanary]

Grim or grump... Out with the wife and kids down Newark riverside. They'd left me as I was faffing about with my film camera.

It's a slightly weird mix of expensive homes & restaurants interspersed with run down bits on one side and a boatyard on the other which gets increasingly rough

T' other side 

I'd crossed this bridge 

and was off the right trying to get arty shots of a weir and the footbridge. I'd just had a quick waz keeping my camera out of the splash zone and as I exit the bush a young bloke appears.

Feeling slightly embarrassed I mutters a "how do". "Not bad" replies he "I'm not dead".

I did a double take then thought well you might be dead soon. Slung across both shoulders and nearly touching the ground were 2 newly liberated public charging EV cables complete with charging plugs!

[808 Estate]

[myglaren]

 

[High Jetter]

2 hours ago, 808 Estate said:

If that's real, it's brilliant.

[hairnet]

'im in love with a german film star orange tatra....'

also lol at it being photobombed by the white petrol truck

 

 

[hairnet]

snowplow of clag

and thats just the intro lol