Autoshite 2028

[phil_lihp]

OK, it's 15 years in the future and it's time to trawel ebay for your next purchase.  What to choose?  Now that cars which were far too new and expensive in 2013 are worth £500 (or whatever the equivalent of £500 will be), what could you see yourself in?

 

I honestly can't stand the idea of owning another car laden with DMF, EGR, DPF, EBD and electronic handbrake but perhaps by then we'll be able to work around them.

 

Not many moderns appeal to me but I do rather like the look of these:

 

 

Not a fan of the regular 1-series, my girlfriend has one and while it's nice enough to drive they're way too expensive and the hatchback looks rather ugly to me.  Once they're dirt cheap, I reckon I could go for a coupe though, ideally in white or burnt orange.  Cars like my C'eed will probably make good cheap smokers by then as well if the rust prevention is as good as the rest of the car.

 

What could you see yourself in?

[Wilko220]

I'd quite like one of the last Saab 95s before the firm went kaput - I thought they were a great looking car and can see one maybe being an eventual replacement for my Rover 75.

[philibusmo]

2028 Ultimate Autoshite:

Alternative 2028 Autoshite also includes:

Datsun Tiida

Fiat Idea

Hyundai Grandeur

Chrysler Delta

Saab 95

Chrysler Sebring

Dodge Avenger

Perodua Myvi

Toyota Urban Cruiser

Proton Gen2 (Not available in J Reg)

I can think of plenty more obscure and already utterly misery inducing UK spec automobiles from the past few years but I shall spare you of them for the moment before you all die of boredom.

[Novanick1]

id quite like one of the last rovers, those facelift ones they bought out just before they went bust. probably a 45  

[Ghosty]

I'd like a Dacia Duster in black, (the new one obviously) with the steel wheels etc. They look great, and for some reason the chunky styling reminds me of a beginner car in some kind of computer game.

[srad34]

Any Rover, absolutely timeless shite.....

[Faker]

Audi A5 s.line. Fuking nom!!

[cms206]

KIA MAGENTIS WITH LUXURY DOGSKIN LEATHER AND POWER BY V6 KETTLE

[jmsguzzi]

I hope that the current Jag XJ is as cheap as the X300's are now in 15 years time. Especially the new XJR. Also like the new 4 door 6 series and would love to pick up a facelift Alfa 166 as they could become as rare as the Alfa 6 is now.

[Junkman]

I was thinking long and hard. My conclusion is - - nothing.

 

CUZ ALL NU CARZ R SHIT!

 

Interestingly, that's the only rule I know for which no exception exists.

[Cavcraft]

One of those Jag XF things would do me just nicely, thank you.

[sporty-shite]

Laguna coupe & Alfa Brera. Future sporty shite.

[RedSparrow]

Got to be an MG6. They will be worth about 5p in 15 years.

[chaseracer]

They're worth about 5p NOW...

 

[John F]

In 2028, the discerning shiter will spend 360 EuroCredits on a white 1.6 Peugeot 405 Style with a dent on the boot by the 405 badge and 20 old pence stuck down by the handbrake.

[Spiny Norman]

Good call on the Alfa Brera. Nissan Juke has to be a prime contender, as has the Cashcow, just judging by how many of the things there are about just now.

I can see a Cashcow in 15 years time, bashed and battered with crunched bumpers and scabby paint, grizzling its way from Matalan to Maccy Ds.

[Junkman]

I can't see any of the horrors mentioned so far in this thread being around in 15 years time. Thanks God this could actually be PHAKT based on the assumption that in the meantime some fuggin computer will have failed to properly calculate the amount of 3 specific carbohydrate molecules per milligram of exhaust gas during a MoT test and therefore those ugly heaps will thankfully no longer insult my aesthetic perception with their presence. They'll all be disposed off in an environmentally sound way, as BRIGIN is called in NUSP33K.

 

The way I see things progressing in the socioeconomic field, I can thank God on knees if in 15 years hence I'm still able to afford to do the odd few miles with the Piggy 405 and Over Pissix I own now. However, I'd rather push a pushbike, than buy any of this newfangled shit.

[phil_lihp]

OK...

 

Anyhoo, interesting set of choices, I do agree it'll probably as now be the expensive, complicated gas-guzzlers which hit rock bottom first.  Interesting to guess which ones will become rare by then - I can definitely see the C6 becoming the new Tagora in more ways than one.  Subarus have a habit of vanishing past a certain age, thus I reckon there won't be many B9 Tribecas around by 2028 given that they never sold many to begin with.  Some things don't change.

[inconsistant]

volvo c30, skoda yeti, honda jizz, vw up, mini clubman, peugeot rcz, vw scirocco

 

I reckon* the scientific* way to do this would be to look at the latest Which? to see which cars they're recommending their pre-giffer subscribership pootle down to the chemist in, and choose a shortlist from those.

[phil_lihp]

I'd reckon that the Hyundai i10 will be the new Austin Metro - in the next 20 years most of them will have vanished without trace but you'll see a regular trickle of one-giffer-owned, garage-found minters cropping up with 6000 miles on the clock.

[Junkman]

What about those Kia Souls? I'd say they can be had for a song in 15 years hence and I've even seen beige ones around.

Not that I would ever buy one, mind.

[DVee8]

I would like one of these

.

 

Merc E-class coupe

[Ghosty]

The Toyota GT86 (Subaru BRZ to some) will be GR9 4 DRIFTIN YO. It'd be a great car to have in its standard form, unless the same thing happens as has done to UK Nissan 180SX and 200SXs, in which case there won't be any left.

[chaseracer]

In 2028, the discerning shiter will spend 360 EuroCredits on a white 1.6 Peugeot 405 Style with a dent on the boot by the 405 badge and 20 old pence stuck down by the handbrake.

I'll be watching for that...

[Pillock]

Let's think about this. Today, we wet ourselves as an Autoshite collective over Citroens with spazzy suspension, anything that runs on weird fuel, and cars that have depreciated more than shares in your Egyptian desert tour business.

 

So futureshite will probably be the MG6 (depreciation tick - dealers are currently offering the car for free, and you get to have a go on the salesman's girlfriend once a week for a year as a bonus), something with a twin clutch auto box so say an Audi Q7 (that ticks the fearsome technology box, nobody else will touch them once they're out of warranty), and the weird fuel would have to be a Prius hooked up to some home-made charger and 45,000 AA batteries from Poundland.

[phil_lihp]

a Prius hooked up to some home-made charger and 45,000 AA batteries from Poundland.

 

That has made my evening and I can't wait for you to show it to us!  Although a trailer loaded with old car batteries bought for a fiver from the scrapyard would work just as well.

[phil_lihp]

Bingo: http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/toyota-prius-hybrid-/331004806991?pt=Automobiles_UK&hash=item4d116c874f

 

 

It's like looking into the future.

[Negative Creep]

Unless we abandon our shite and buy hybrids we'll have died of climate change long before 2028

[John F]

Ewwww.....! That thing has an utterly gopping dashboard. And what might be either a column gearshifter or a falafel-hook, I could believe anything from this mobile munting device.

[Pillock]

I'll have that bet with you. Five quid says I'm both alive, and not driving a hybrid in 15 years time.