Dreaming of shite

[vulgalour]

Driving down a country road I thought there was something wrong with my car.  There was, it wasn't the car I was expecting but an Austin A90.  The car was blue, but a dark metallic, and all the cream dash trim inside was made of white chocolate.  Further, while I was in the car it had a roof but once I got out the roof was gone.  I got back in and the car was making a weird noise so I pulled over and got out to see it had no wheels and was hovering.  I was going to get back in and hover off but the dream was interrupted by someone knocking on the door in the real world.

[purplebargeken]

Bastards, it's catching.

 

The PBK family were on holiday in NZ on the North island. PBK son had gone to the shops and volcano's on the island were erupting and spewing lava all over the place. We were driving round the island in Mrs PBK's red Micra so I took it to look for son. I found him but had to detour loads because of the bastard lava. We then drove to the South island still in the Micra. This may just be a gentle introduction to the weird dream world of Autoshite. I fear for my soul.

[NorfolkNWeigh]

Some weird shit is happening. First I dreamt that I was having a head on crash in something with a walnut dash , maybe a M2 Jag, it was happening in slow motion and I was either really small or the car was twice its normal size. I woke up shouting out in pain according to Mrs N.

The weird part is that twice today I've met things head on and had to brake hard, first a twat in a black Galaxy coming the wrong way up a slip road at Heathrow. Anyone near London knows this isn't exactly rare with United Nations of AddisonLee drivers. But then a courier in a VW Transporter almost got me ,going the wrong way round a roundabout about 200 yds from home! I'm not leaving the house again today ,apart from walking to the pub.

[ShiteRider]

I dreamt about Junkman last night, someone i've never met in real life, for some reason he had a selection of p6's and i wanted an almond one but got a orangey red one instead........i'm pretty sure he was the devil as well, but had the face of nigel mansell.

[michael t]

I dreamt about road testing a brown MK4 Escort last night dressed in Chris Goffey attire on top of a multi-storey carpark in Liverpool, I was pleasantly surprised by its smooth running and excellent turning circle, which was pretty much all I could test up there 

[Guest Breadvan72]

I have had several recent dreams that feature the 1986 Beemer I owned from 1989 to 1993.

[Station]

Had a dream the other night I was going into my mum's house and heard a roaring sound coming up the road. Looked behind me and saw a three wheeler Reliant Robin speeding past with a youth driving it.

The thing is, I think this might have actually happened and I wasn't dreaming as it was late and I was tired.

[CreepingJesus]

Recently, I dreamt I found a Jag XJ in a barn, reg number M119ABE. I sold the plate to Robert Mugabe for fifty grand, so he could put it on the C90, of his pizza shop in Perth.

I reckon that one speaks of skint desperation. ..

[Jikovron]

I virtually never dream of anything, however I do remember the one highlight from about age 13 of attempting to fire up a Suffolk punch mower however it would only run without the cylinder head fitted however I decided it was better with the head fitted for safety reasons so tried to bolt it back on while it was idling just in case it wouldn't restart after fitment  at which point it suddenly transformed became a Suffolk punch powered Norton and side car combination. 

 

I've never been able to subconsciously beat that since unfortunately, they've all been far too mundane there after i.e. just jumbled up replays of the day prior 

[brickwall]

A while back I dreamt my Range Rover was somehow connect to the ground by some strange gravity and it simply would not move. Some special power was keeping it in place. Bizarre.

[quicksilver]

I had a weird dream last night. I started off in this strange early-90s shopping centre and after looking around the shops for a while and not finding anything of interest I decided to go spotting in the nearby housing estate. It must have actually been the early 90s as there was chod everywhere (I remember a blue VW Jetta with big alloys and a Honda Ballade) but I had a smartphone so I was happily snapping away at everything in sight. Then for some reason I had to visit this reclusive old man to check he was looking after himself. I expected him to be a hoarder but he turned out not to have any cars at all so I was really disappointed, and then I woke up. What does it all mean? 

[cms206]

No recent shite dreams but last night I dreamed I had a white male cat and a black female cat who could talk but only to me. In the style of the voiceovers you used to get in films like Homeward Bound. I think I need to start drinking.

[ProgRocker]

Quite a few times I have dreamt that I chopped in the Almera for something 80s-tastic and basic.

 

I have a FlickR account and quite a few times I have gone to take a photo of a rare car but for some reason I was unable to take the photo. Happened for real a few weeks ago when a mark 2 Granada Ghia drove past me - had my camera on me but I didn't react fast enough.

[PhilA]

Had a fairly strange dream the other evening, involved a bit of modern shite.

 

I was in my parents back yard which turned into the rugby field at my old school which then turned into one of the favorite bits of woodland I used to go walking up in. Parked in a clearing, amongst the trees was the little red Kia Soul one of my work colleagues drives.

There were police cars and ambulances with their lights flashing. She was upset because she'd been driving it at freeway speed and it came to an instant halt. Somebody had then crashed into the back of it.

I took a look at the car, the back end was crushed and had a hole in, plus it had caught fire. Then the back of the car fell off to reveal there was nothing wrong with the car after all.

It wouldn't start, so I climbed inside and took a look at the fuel injection computer, which was a circuit board the size of a pizza box (looked remarkably like some of the electronics I work with in a day to day basis) so I took it apart some more because it was built from several circuit boards stacked together.

There was a flashing red light on the bottom board which stopped flashing whenever I called someone to take a look at it. I reassembled the fuel computer and then tried to bump start the car in first gear down the hill but the clutch wouldn't let and kept slipping. I tried second but ran out of hill to try it. The dashboard was flashing allsorts of red and orange symbols at me that I didn't understand because they were in Korean. I tried to start the car and it ran, went to drive it up the hill and got stuck in mud.

 

At that point I woke up. Apparently I'd been waving my arms about and talking gibberish in my sleep and it woke the wife up...

 

Phil

[Shep Shepherd]

Had a dream last night that I was driving around Shoeburyness in The Volvo and every other car on the road was a mark 2 Cavalier of some type

[vulgalour]

Dad and I were visiting my late gran and on our way back we spotted a dark grey Vauxhall Cava-senator in the car park with siliconed windscreen seal.  We got in, drove it around and took it home so we could sell it.  When asked if we were allowed to just take it Dad said it was fine because the tax and insurance documents were in the car.  We put it on eBay and then I went home to find my car was beeping it's horn for no reason.  Went to investigate and found the woman from the hairdressers next door kept going in my faded blue Maxi and taking boxes of hair stuff out of it, when challenged she just laughed and said she was allowed.  I had to turn my other Maxi around to face the other way to stop her at which point the hairdressers shop became our actual neighbour's house and my two Maxis were now two indeterminate white 90s Fords that looked a bit like Mk2 Astras.

 

When I woke up my brain was adamant I had a Maxi on the drive even though it was the most random and disjointed series of events and couldn't possibly have been true.

[cms206]

Been a bizarre weekend. Been laid up ill, dreams have included;

 

- Bedford Astramax rta nightmare

- talking cats

- Phil and Peggy Mitchell fighting in my kitchen about the merits of the Ford Sierra over the U11 Bluebird. Phil preferred the Bluebird.

- Cloning bendibuses in an abandoned airfield. For reasons I don't quite know Quentin Wilson was involved.

 

I think I need to visit the doctors.

[Junkman]

I dreamt about Junkman last night, someone i've never met in real life, for some reason he had a selection of p6's and i wanted an almond one but got a orangey red one instead........i'm pretty sure he was the devil as well, but had the face of nigel mansell.

 

You have a serious problem and should urgently start working on it with a therapist. Or meet me in real life.

[Mr Livered]

I haven't dreamt about Junkman but I did dream about Reggie Ritmo not so long ago (might have been last night). Anyone know what happened to him?

[NorfolkNWeigh]

I dreamt last night that I was shagging a woman that was at a New Years Eve Masked Ball I went to in real life. She is everything I don't like in women Loud, coarse,chavvy with fake tan and tits and to make it worse we were in an Audi TT which I think was mine! I hate Audi TT's as much as any right minded person, what the hell is wrong with me?

[Hertz]

Last night I had a dream I won the lottery and went to purchase my dream car. I have never thought about the subject much but it was one of these and I think in reality it was a cracking choice! Roll on 5 and 2 stars tomorrow night....

 

[mercrocker]

I blame you lot on here but last night I dreamt I had a blue MkV Cortina.  I was painstakingly removing all the outer panels and uploading a thread about the rust I found underneath them (and the screen rubbers).   Worse still, I kept comparing the car to a white Cortina which I also never owned in reality.   When I woke up I did remember that I once had a beige Mk IV which actually is much more in keeping with this forum but about which I had almost completely forgotten.... Shame I woke up really, I was quite getting to like that blue one....

[dugong]

Right, that quattro formaggio pizza mangled my brain last night. 

I dreamed I was driving KITT, exactly the same as the programme except that its voice was Warren T Claim. 

 

SAMPLE DIALOGUE:

Me: What's the point of this mission?

WARREN T KITT: Christ knows. Did I tell you about that time I watched Escape To Victory on acid?

[Jim Bergerac]

For some reason I had a shite dream double-header last night.

 

First one involved the knackered Audi V8 posted the other day on the ebay thread. I can't fathom why but in this dream I had somehow became certain it was parked on a driveway local to me and I was searching the town looking for it. Whilst doing this I was purchasing a Ford Fiesta Van from ebay on my phone for £395 (in the real world, I don't even have a smartphone, FFS). I think the best dream interpreter going would struggle to fathom that one out.

 

Number two, involved me staying with a mate. Another mate was picking us up to go for a drink and came along in a late sixties Chevrolet Chevelle Convertible (this is odd for two reasons, one he would never have such a thing and two I am not particularly into American cars). I get into this car (which was RHD) and kept on having to adjust the seat as I couldn't get comfortable in it (my head was pressed to the roof and no matter how I adjusted it couldn't get more headroom). When I woke up, completely confused I found I had my head right up against the headboard.

[quicksilver]

The bus shite thread must have influenced last night's dream. It started supposedly about 20 years ago when I was in a yard full of derelict buses that were coming up for auction. They were all totally knackered and at least one had been under a low bridge and had its roof ripped off, so I had a look round them, then went home and thought no more about it. Fast forward to the present day and I received a letter from the council telling me to pay a huge amount of rent I owed and move my buses from the yard or they would scrap them. It turned out I had placed a bid that was way over the odds and won the auction, but no one ever told me I now owned the buses so I never went back and they were still there 20 years later! I hope this isn't telling me I bought something stupid a long time ago and forgot about it, but the weirdest thing is that I'm only 28 so that means I would have bought those buses when I was 8 years old!

[purplebargeken]

I have a cold which might be responsible for weird shite dreams.

 

I was in France for the day (had to be a dream), I was driving a 2003 metallic blue MINI and had parked in a multi-storey carpark. I went and bought some food and drink to bring home, lobbed it in the car and tried to start it. Nothing happening apart from it struggling to turn over. Then smoke started pouring out of the engine bay. I managed to get the bonnet open and found every available space crammed with packs of food and drink that Mrs. PBK's stupid bitch of a cousin had lobbed in there. She'd done it to save her having to carry it back through customs.

 

The engine was knackered and everything was burned to a crisp and the police started to arrive with the Pompiers. My mobile phone battery was on it's last legs and I had of course forgotten to bring the in-car charger, so I couldn't even phone Mrs. PBK for help. I managed to leg it before the cops got wind of who I was and I woke up very, very annoyed with the cousin still. I quite liked the MINI to be honest. It was quite nippy.

 

I may take some Paracetamol before going to bed tonight, just in case. 

[warren t claim]

Right, that quattro formaggio pizza mangled my brain last night. 

 

I dreamed I was driving KITT, exactly the same as the programme except that its voice was Warren T Claim. 

 

SAMPLE DIALOGUE:

 

Me: What's the point of this mission?

 

WARREN T KITT: Christ knows. Did I tell you about that time I watched Escape To Victory on acid?

That policeman who helped me home when he found me crying on the steps of the police station was very helpful!

 

Anyway, a bumper shitefest in my subconscious last night that started by me dreaming of going on a Land Rover parts safari. Highlights included a drop snoot Firenza undergoing a resto, a Carlton style Opel Record, a very rusty Mk1 Escort 4 door, a very early Commer van, a couple of unrestored Y plate Cortinas and a beige Hillman Hunter. On top of that the scrappy owner showed me the part of his yard that he never frags due to the cars being GRP and I wandered around numerous early Reliants and Matra-Simcas.

[Sloth in a bowl]

I few days ago I dreamt I was driving a Ford Bronco (late 80's version). It was tatty and missing bits of bodywork and trim but also had jacked up suspension and was great off road. When I finally steered it onto the tarmac then I got stopped by the police for speeding despite not having gone fast enough to speed. Then 200 yards down the road another policeman stopped me for speeding.

 

This dream tells me two things.

1. I should stop watching youtubes of american offroading

2. It's better to be done for speeding in a dream than reality

[CreepingJesus]

Maybe cos I'm missing my copy of J G Ballard's 'Crash', I dreamt about crashing a silver Maser. I drove it the wrong way up a slip road and all, just to see what would happen.

Except I crashed into the Scotoshite default carvery, right in the front door as far as the fruit machine. Which, when toppled, spilled its' load of small green Asda charity tokens.

I ate dinner then passed out from severe blood loss.

[Junkman]

I actually did dream of an Avocado green P6 with a Mango interior before such an example actually got listed for sale on CCFS.

I also dreamt about my 405 self-combusting in my back garden and burning to the ground.