The most useless feature of a car?

[sierraman]

The accelerator pedal on a Corsa 1.0. Pressing it down made zero difference to its actual progress, it just made more noise.

[GR8 PL8 M8]

  On 10/03/2023 at 22:27, S2000 said:

Come to think of it what’s the feckin point of lowering my windows with the remote?

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I used to have a Polo that could do that, it was brilliant on a hot day. Lower the windows from inside ten minutes before you leave and come out to an aired out car. I probably used it more for putting the windows back up after I realised that I'd left them down after shutting the door though...

[AnnoyingPentium]

  On 15/03/2023 at 07:54, GregZX said:

Low screen wash sensor. Sounds like a good idea but in my skoda it’s triggered at half left. And then it goes off and on again when you turn the corner. Just another unnecessary dash light, like the one that goes off at 4 degrees temperature, usually accompanied by me shouting “what the fucks wrong with you now!!!!”

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The chimes/bongs of doom. I lock up in some sort of PTSD spec thing whenever the temperature drops and I hear the beep that symbolises every time something has went wrong on the ungrateful fucker. I feel like this is an accurate representation of my stare of dread when I need to look at the dash to see why it beeped.

[Metal Guru]

  On 15/03/2023 at 21:18, AnnoyingPentium said:

The chimes/bongs of doom. I lock up in some sort of PTSD spec thing whenever the temperature drops and I hear the beep that symbolises every time something has went wrong on the ungrateful fucker. I feel like this is an accurate representation of my stare of dread when I need to look at the dash to see why it beeped.

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Good job Samsung don’t make cars. ( Anyone with a Samsung washing machine knows what I mean).

[808 Estate]

  On 15/03/2023 at 12:28, sierraman said:

The accelerator pedal on a Corsa 1.0. Pressing it down made zero difference to its actual progress, it just made more noise.

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My A series truck was exactly the same. Whoever thought a 3 litre V6 petrol engine would be a good idea in a 5 1/2 tonner.

[martc]

  On 16/03/2023 at 00:40, Metal Guru said:

Good job Samsung don’t make cars. ( Anyone with a Samsung washing machine knows what I mean).

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*Cough* Samsung do make cars *Cough*.

No idea if they go 'bong', but they are owned by Renault so the chances of an occasional bong are higher than the norm.

https://www.renaultkoream.com/new/main/main.jsp

The little remembered Renault Koleos (the one from 2009 ish) was a rebadged Samsung.

[RoverFolkUs]

  On 13/03/2023 at 13:32, PhilA said:

Automatics that lock out P electrically have a manual release for if the battery is dead, usually under the trim. Read The Manual, it'll tell you.

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Can't remember what models exactly but the only way on a certain generation of BMW is to jack the car up, undo the million 8mm screws to remove one of the million undertrays and then there's a pull cord on the transmission itself. ☹️ That's the only way of getting it out of park in the instance of an electrical malfunction... 

[PhilA]

  On 18/03/2023 at 19:44, RoverFolkUs said:

Can't remember what models exactly but the only way on a certain generation of BMW is to jack the car up, undo the million 8mm screws to remove one of the million undertrays and then there's a pull cord on the transmission itself. ☹️ That's the only way of getting it out of park in the instance of an electrical malfunction... 

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In two feet of snow, great design.

[RoverFolkUs]

  On 15/03/2023 at 21:18, AnnoyingPentium said:

The chimes/bongs of doom. I lock up in some sort of PTSD spec thing whenever the temperature drops and I hear the beep that symbolises every time something has went wrong on the ungrateful fucker. I feel like this is an accurate representation of my stare of dread when I need to look at the dash to see why it beeped.

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*Beep* washer fluid low

*Beep* ambient temperature low

*Beep* "don't mean to alarm you, but you have no oil pressure" 

🤣🤣

[Shortos]

  On 13/03/2023 at 13:13, sierraman said:

Am I the only one that just prefers manual heating. 

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Yes! 3 dials please. Fan Speed, direction and Temp. 

[ETCHY]

  On 19/03/2023 at 08:21, Shortos said:

Yes! 3 dials please. Fan Speed, direction and Temp. 

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Saw a recent test of cheapest new cars & the thing they were raving about on  Picanto was how easy & simple it was to adjust controls even when going round a corner & not have to go through menu's

Something has gone very wrong with car design imho.  So much is form over function.

[Asimo]

  On 18/03/2023 at 19:15, 808 Estate said:

Whoever thought a 3 litre V6 petrol engine would be a good idea in a 5 1/2 tonner.

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Someone who had driven an A series with the York Diesel engine?

[Low ontime]

  On 18/03/2023 at 20:46, PhilA said:

In two feet of snow, great design.

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German engineering innit… (rolls eyes) 

[Low ontime]

  On 19/03/2023 at 09:18, ETCHY said:

 

Saw a recent test of cheapest new cars & the thing they were raving about on  Picanto was how easy & simple it was to adjust controls even when going round a corner & not have to go through menu's

Something has gone very wrong with car design imho.  So much is form over function.

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Very much so.

why try to reinvent the wheel? 

[cobblers]

  On 19/03/2023 at 11:35, Low ontime said:

Very much so.

why try to reinvent the wheel? 

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touchscreens and capacitive buttons are now cheaper to design and manufacture than switches, knobs and buttons, and unfortunately the car buying public are easily wowed by (to quote techmoan/sir anal sugar) "A mugs eyeful" and when they see a touchscreen vs actual usable controls, they will by and large prefer to buy the car with a touchscreen despite it being much less pleasant to use in real life, because it looks more modern and premium.

A car manufacturer would be silly not to include a touchscreen system, they make the car cheaper to make and more attractive to buy. Hopefully there will be some legislative pushback on this because public opinion is slow to change.

 

Just like super low profile tyres on massive alloy wheels on family hatchbacks, car manufacturers are forced to make cars objectively worse in order to sell more of them.

[MikeR]

Nitrogen in the tyres ......

obviously at a inflated price ...

gets coat

[Low ontime]

  On 19/03/2023 at 11:42, cobblers said:

touchscreens and capacitive buttons are now cheaper to design and manufacture than switches, knobs and buttons, and unfortunately the car buying public are easily wowed by (to quote techmoan/sir anal sugar) "A mugs eyeful" and when they see a touchscreen vs actual usable controls, they will by and large prefer to buy the car with a touchscreen despite it being much less pleasant to use in real life, because it looks more modern and premium.

A car manufacturer would be silly not to include a touchscreen system, they make the car cheaper to make and more attractive to buy. Hopefully there will be some legislative pushback on this because public opinion is slow to change.

 

Just like super low profile tyres on massive alloy wheels on family hatchbacks, car manufacturers are forced to make cars objectively worse in order to sell more of them.

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It’s too fussy, no one really wants to know if it’s  23 degrees C, most folk are full bore hot or freezing cold. It’s distracting and takes your eye of the road when setting  in my view. 

[Metal Guru]

  On 19/03/2023 at 11:47, MikeR said:

Nitrogen in the tyres ......

obviously at a inflated price ...

gets coat

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Preys on the ignorance of the general population who can recite Xfactor / Strictly / I’m a celebrity winners ad nauseam, but haven’t a clue that air is 80% Nitrogen  anyway. I’m surprised it hasn’t backfired on the tyre dealers with people not wanting a poisonous gas in their tyres.

Would  be unnecessary ( more unnecessary ) if they actually maintained airlines properly so they weren’t full of water.

[MikeR]

  On 19/03/2023 at 11:53, Metal Guru said:

Preys on the ignorance of the general population who can recite Xfactor / Strictly / I’m a celebrity winners ad nauseam, but haven’t a clue that air is 80% Nitrogen  anyway. I’m surprised it hasn’t backfired on the tyre dealers with people not wanting a poisonous gas in their tyres.

Would  be unnecessary ( more unnecessary ) if they actually maintained airlines properly so they weren’t full of water.

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so the lesser gasses leak out because thats what Nitrogen does not do ( according to the blub ) leaving just nitrogen in the tyre ???

gets footpump out and offers to sell 78% Nitogen to mugs

[RayMK]

I parked next to a bloated Tesla SUV thing in the bank car park the other day.  As I stood up getting out of my car, my head was at its window level.  The sun was shining across its featureless dashboard - well, almost featureless - all I could see was a large dashboard panel absolutely plastered with fingerprints.  It looked like the counter in a fish and chip shop.  Ghastly!  

[martc]

  On 19/03/2023 at 11:53, Metal Guru said:

 I’m surprised it hasn’t backfired on the tyre dealers with people not wanting a poisonous gas in their tyres.

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Nitrogen is not poisonous. As alluded to above you are breathing in 78% nitrogen each time you take a breath.  100% nitrogen will asphyxiate you, very rapidly, but that's because there's no oxygen in it not because it's poisonous.

(In fact nitrogen is very inert, the amount of energy required to get it to do anything is astronomical).

[loserone]

I think that was his point 

[Metal Guru]

  On 20/03/2023 at 12:32, martc said:

Nitrogen is not poisonous. As alluded to above you are breathing in 78% nitrogen each time you take a breath.  100% nitrogen will asphyxiate you, very rapidly, but that's because there's no oxygen in it not because it's poisonous.

(In fact nitrogen is very inert, the amount of energy required to get it to do anything is astronomical).

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Thanks for that. I was being facetious / sarcastic. I have a degree in Chemistry.

[Barry Cade]

  On 18/03/2023 at 19:44, RoverFolkUs said:

Can't remember what models exactly but the only way on a certain generation of BMW is to jack the car up, undo the million 8mm screws to remove one of the million undertrays and then there's a pull cord on the transmission itself. ☹️ That's the only way of getting it out of park in the instance of an electrical malfunction... 

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It's not a pull cord.. it's another screw.  Then the car won't lock...

[martc]

  On 21/03/2023 at 02:51, Metal Guru said:

Thanks for that. I was being facetious / sarcastic. I have a degree in Chemistry.

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Snap!

I'm not very good at spotting facetiousness or sarcasm....! Perhaps we should adopt the 'sarcmark'.

https://sarcmark.com/

(smiley face wink)

[Asimo]

  On 04/03/2023 at 09:40, juular said:

Sunroofs. I've never seen anyone open one.

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I completely agree that they are to be avoided. However, this one was always useful for buying timber and the like.

 

[uk_senator]

  On 19/03/2023 at 11:42, cobblers said:

touchscreens and capacitive buttons are now cheaper to design and manufacture than switches, knobs and buttons.

A car manufacturer would be silly not to include a touchscreen system, they make the car cheaper to make and more attractive to buy. Hopefully there will be some legislative pushback on this because public opinion is slow to change.

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Its illegal to piss about with your mobile when driving, & understandably so, so, how is it legal to have to plough through 3 menus on a touch screen in the middle of the dash to do a basic function that a simple button would do with ease? Maybe if they routinely did voice control combined with touch screens (as a few already do) it would make more sense, & still be cheaper than the buttons & knobs they`re trying to avoid designing & making.

On Fifth Gear Recharged yesterday, Vicky B-H was testing a new "Genesis" which had a screen in the middle of the dash (literally) which displayed a real time video monitor of the view ahead with the satnav overlaid onto it.. sounds great in theory, but, she found mega distracting & found herself repeatedly looking at the screen to see what was happening ahead, rather than looking out the actual windscreen, which I can well believe.... So, I`ll expect to find loads of front ended Genesis's at Copart once they take off.. 

[AnnoyingPentium]

  On 22/03/2023 at 15:06, uk_senator said:

voice control

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As someone from the middle of nowhere in Scotland, I can tell you why this wouldn't work...

[MrGTI6]

  On 22/03/2023 at 16:05, AnnoyingPentium said:

As someone from the middle of nowhere in Scotland, I can tell you why this wouldn't work...

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Sorry. Please try again.

[DavieW]

  On 22/03/2023 at 18:50, MrGTI6 said:

Sorry. Please try again.

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