320touring's Elgrand.. tyred and Hired (not really, just on loan) 15/05/23

[320touring]

33 minutes ago, Supernaut said:

SKEEERRRRAP

At least I only own 1/4 of the scrap on show😂

[hairnet]

for now

[320touring]

As the week has progressed, the novelty of cruising about in dog scented, belt squealing van has worn somewhat thin..

To whit, an attempt to rectify a fair few issues was made yesterday.

Thanks to @jaypee @Supernaut and @captain_70s for their assistance at various points!

 

The first thing that we found was:

THAT FUCKING SQUEAK was an easy fix!

@jaypee had found a forum post online saying that a sqeal from the alternator was usually due to a belt being too loose. 

The previous owner had just fitted new belts...

@Supernaut found the tensioner bolt

The belt was able to be turned to 90degrees initially, so we tightened it until it could only twist 45/50 degrees..

Result? No squeak and a full 14v at idle as soon as it starts.

An additional fix was done to the negative connection on the battery so it clamps properly.

 

The second thing we found out was that I am a time served panel beater...

As it initially was

After application of a hammer and dolly* (block of wood). @captain_70s stopped it popping open as I caressed it.

Removed for further fettling

Refitted and tweaked by hand 

It's not @GingerNuttz quality but it is fucking miles better, and worth at least 1mpg due to less drag🤣

I also went round some of the rust blebs, knocking them back then coating them with vactan before some primer.

they need done properly but hopefully this will stop any further deterioration until I can complete them.

@Supernaut also took a pass at the plastic headlamp lenses with polish.

Before

after

[320touring]

The interior was also attended to.

The front mats were removed and the cabin hoovered

plenty work there for the hoover, but they came up really well!

I also gave the driver and passenger seat an initial hoover, scrub and wet vac - still some work to do but significantly less mank

The mats needed a stiff brush to remover the white dog hair, then hoovering before a scrub and second hoover to dry them out.

Before

After (laid out to dry in the sun)

They look great back in!

 

The back passenger compartment got pretty much the same treatment - mats out/brushed and hoovered and the carpet all swept and hoovered. The seats were all hoovered too

If you look closely you can see the plastic discs that slide beneath the seat rails to locate the mats, and the poppers that let the two rear sections securely connect. 

They are belters of mats - @Jim Bell would barely be able to control himself if he were to see them in the flesh.

 

there was plenty of detritus to be removed from the rear.

 

after all that, the interior was a significantly more pleasant place to be - here we see @Supernaut enjoying* it

[loserone]

He looks to be enjoying the luxurious environment 

[320touring]

13 minutes ago, loserone said:

He looks to be enjoying the luxurious environment 

It was pretty cool sitting in comfort eating my sausage supper at dinner time😁

[Jim Bell]

Those floor mats give me a wet end. 

[320touring]

Just now, Jim Bell said:

Those floor mats give me a wet end. 

Come up and see them IN REEL LYFE

[loserone]

I'm surprised you've not moved into the van already 

[320touring]

Just now, loserone said:

I'm surprised you've not moved into the van already 

Surprisingly, the burd doesn't mind it, so I am still allowed in the hoose🤣

[barefoot]

Those Ozoku Crew stickers are causing me much worry, this is the first pic that showed up in a search;

[loserone]

Pretty sure that's who he bought it off 🤣

[320touring]

Yep that looks like the couple. Nice folks, his n her's Silvias ..

Can afford shoes too🤪

[loserone]

1 minute ago, 320touring said:

Can afford shoes too🤪

Bet they don't even name their cars

[motorpunk]

Nice! Dog stink... you'll never shift that. I fucking hate dog stink. Good luck.

[320touring]

15 minutes ago, motorpunk said:

Nice! Dog stink... you'll never shift that. I fucking hate dog stink. Good luck.

It's come up pretty well. May go for a pass with a rug doctor (fnar) at a later date...

[vulgalour]

Dog stink is easy to get rid of you just drive with the windows open all the time or get a dog of your own so you can't smell dog stink any more.

[AnnoyingPentium]

13 minutes ago, vulgalour said:

Dog stink is easy to get rid of you just drive with the windows open all the time or get a dog of your own so you can't smell dog stink any more.

Happy to provide a 9 y/o Springer Spaniel for such duties.

[320touring]

Just now, AnnoyingPentium said:

Happy to provide a 9 y/o Springer Spaniel for such duties.

Thanks but naw!

[320touring]

I am due to use this discrete and quiet automobile to turn up at a mates hoose in a posh part of Edinburgh tomorrow..

 

Question is,

do I guesstimate what fuel I'll need for the return journey (90ish miles) 

Or 

Go Billy big baws and fill the fucker (76L), so about £104 at current prices here?

 

If it does 400 miles (644km) to a tank that is about 24mpg..

Or £0.26 a mile..

 

What would you do?

[hairnet]

half fill it obvs

youse are nearer the oil fields - shud be cheaper no?

 

[hairnet]

5 hours ago, loserone said:

He looks to be enjoying the luxurious environment 

 

5 hours ago, 320touring said:

It was pretty cool sitting in comfort eating my sausage supper at dinner time😁

does look like hes seen a tarantula and is scared

 

[3VOM]

On 1/30/2023 at 9:40 PM, 320touring said:

Decided to have a swing at cleaning the front of this today..

To say it is manky is an understatement

The natty OEM overmats have seen a dug or twa..

 

Why do you have floor mats made from 90s VW upholstery?

Ozone generator might work on dog smell.

[320touring]

5 hours ago, 3VOM said:

Why do you have floor mats made from 90s VW upholstery?

Ozone generator might work on dog smell.

I think the answer to your question is #JDMYO..

 

I have no idea!

[320touring]

One cause of consternation on Wednesday was an inability to locate the fuse that controls the supply to the windscreen washer motors.

I get no noise when operating either the front or rear ones, and the bottle is tucked away in the inner wing. So before I pulled it apart, I wanted to check the fuse ..

 

The only info I have to go on is that the fuse should be on an internal fuse box - but the guide I have to read is too blurred for use on my phone..

Anyone any ideas? It's a 1998 e50 Elgrand thanks

[captain_70s]

The internal boxes have have fuse 3 down as "front wiper".

Can't see anything directly related to the washers...

[320touring]

47 minutes ago, captain_70s said:

The internal boxes have have fuse 3 down as "front wiper".

Can't see anything directly related to the washers...

Yeah I saw that - wipers work ok, so I assume that fuse is alright.. 

I'm going to have to get into the washer bottle to check, ain't I..

[320touring]

What's moar fear inducing than being in the same room as Priti Patel when she has not been fed an asylum seeker for 15 mins? 

That's right, filling the tank on a new car ..

This has been on fleet for precisely 8 days and 20hrs at the time of writing. So far it has all been splash n dash.

But not today. Today, I had the testicular fortitude to avail myself of all the lovely E10 that the ElGrand would swallow..

How much? £91 quid!!!

Now, a 3.3v6 coupled to a 1990s 4+ OD autobox and stuffed in a brick shithouse is never going to be a recipe for high MPG.

The aim of this (costly) experiment is to see if TOLERABLE economy can be achieved.

Off then to my mates in Edinburgh for a most convivial afternoon. Handily, it dropped no petrol whilst being filled or sitting at my mates.

There and back, 154km was covered (95.7miles)

No idea how much fuel has been used but the gauge has gone from touching the F (red line) to where it rests over 154km ( 95.7 miles). It appears that not kicking the hoor ae fuck oot it constantly has dramatically improved fuel consumption... Who would have guessed?!

 

I shall continue to pootle it aboot and see what number we land on..

If it did 25mpg on a run that wouldn't be the worst

[Rocket88]

5 minutes ago, 320touring said:

What's moar fear inducing than being in the same room as Priti Patel when she has not been fed an asylum seeker for 15 mins? 

That's right, filling the tank on a new car ..

This has been on fleet for precisely 8 days and 20hrs at the time of writing. So far it has all been splash n dash.

But not today. Today, I had the testicular fortitude to avail myself of all the lovely E10 that the ElGrand would swallow..

How much? £91 quid!!!

Now, a 3.3v6 coupled to a 1990s 4+ OD autobox and stuffed in a brick shithouse is never going to be a recipe for high MPG.

The aim of this (costly) experiment is to see if TOLERABLE economy can be achieved.

Off then to my mates in Edinburgh for a most convivial afternoon. Handily, it dropped no petrol whilst being filled or sitting at my mates.

There and back, 154km was covered (95.7miles)

No idea how much fuel has been used but the gauge has gone from touching the F (red line) to where it rests over 154km ( 95.7 miles). It appears that not kicking the hoor ae fuck oot it constantly has dramatically improved fuel consumption... Who would have guessed?!

 

I shall continue to pootle it aboot and see what number we land on..

If it did 25mpg on a run that wouldn't be the worst

Mine used to…. Around the doors it was dipsomaniacal 

[gm]

£1.40/litro isn't so bad, the best I've seen round here is £1.45