The grumpy thread

[chaseracer]

Same thing at our school, where we weren't allowed to play football because "it was a poof's game" and had to do rugby all winter.. Of course there is nothing homoerotic about putting your hands up another boy's shorts then rolling around with him in the mud is there?

 

Apparently, there is if you're watching.  And blowing a whistle.  Which may - or may not - be a euphemism...

[DodgeRover]

Same thing at our school, where we weren't allowed to play football because "it was a poof's game" and had to do rugby all winter.. Of course there is nothing homoerotic about putting your hands up another boy's shorts then rolling around with him in the mud is there?

Good Lord that wasn't the version we had at our school, did you go to a public school?

[Snipes]

My PE teachers were alright.

[meshking]

My PE teachers were alright.

Same here. One of the teachers was a lesbian, which some of my friends thought was hilarious. I couldn't see the amusement, still don't.

 

I just wish we had done stuff that was less competitive and more about improving general fitness.

[LostnotFound]

I loved PE as well. One of the few subjects where most of it was fun. Given my size I was never one to be picked 1st but sports are just games.

 

Playing games appealed far more than learning French to a last kid such as myself.

 

Sod cross country tho, where I used to work there was a school opposite and their route included a really steep hill which was also the route into town. There are few things that make me feel I have any connection with the yoof of today but the looks on the face of the kids near the back of the pack show there is some humanity amongst them.

[Lord Sterling]

High Wycombe and it's needlessly complicated road system. Also, Travelodge, High Wycombe. You've got £71 of my money. Can't you at least provide free parking?

 

On the PE thing. I never really took part in it myself, I often came in with a note, sone times 'forged'. I honestly couldn't be bothered. Shame as I was a good goal keeper and not bad at football/running. It just never interested me.

[beko1987]

Mo, are you in wycombe! I'll be there in 3 hours (well, driving past...)

[myglaren]

I hated PE - games and sports of any description.

Never did it.  Used to slope off to a maths or science class and tell them the PE teacher had sent me.

After a while I wasn't missed anymore.

[dollywobbler]

Same here. One of the teachers was a lesbian, which some of my friends thought was hilarious. I couldn't see the amusement, still don't.

 

I just wish we had done stuff that was less competitive and more about improving general fitness.

 

I thought all female PE teaches were lesbians? Seemed to be what the collective intelligence* of my school chums reckoned anyway.

 

Our school majored on rugby, which I hated. I love to watch it though. I tried watching women's rugby recently, but it just isn't the same. Mind you, it appears to be filmed by work experience kids with a camcorder, which doesn't help.

 

So yeah, sorry. I like watching some sport. Not football though. It's an absolute joke of a sport.

[robinmasters]

I thought all female PE teaches were lesbians? Seemed to be what the collective intelligence* of my school chums reckoned anyway.

Only the unattractive ones. The pretty ones were sleeping with the young male PE teacher/half the sixth form/someone's dad.

 

How grumpy is it reasonable to be when Bernie & Leepu enter one of their structurally-hilarious lash-ups into a race for road-going cars? I'm fairly cross about it.

[Negative Creep]

Good Lord that wasn't the version we had at our school, did you go to a public school?

 

 

Grammar school, and they did indeed tell us to put out hand inside the shorts to get a better grip in the scrum. I soon worked out a technique of standing just in front of the person with the ball, so I'd be offside and thus unable to receive the ball, but it would appear that I was actually trying.

 

The only other thing we got to do in the winter months was cross country, with a circular route that involved going through a patch of woods (complete with a burnt out Escort). So the general technique was to do 2-3 laps, stand around in the woods for a bit, then jog slowly to the finish line and say you'd completed the required number. By that point they'd lost interest and probably couldn't count that high anyway, so they'd just tell you to go and get changed.

[Bobthebeard]

I went to a comprehensive school (whatever that was or is) and hated PE and sports. The PE teacher was a sadist called Les. Not that it matters what he was called. His idea of involving reluctant kids in sport was to humiliate them into joining in, then humiliate them some more when they were useless at whatever sport it was. I was made to play rugby, which I quite liked until Les encouraged someone to tackle me hard and badly. I sustained a neck injury that still bothers me 40 odd years later.

[mercrocker]

We had an ex Army PTI boyo.  I was crap at games, both physically and in the mental sense of not actually giving a fuck about any kind of game that involved a ball or a team.   I used to use my asthma to cop out of most things which worked until I got caught smoking in the copse instead of making sure everybody went round the Cross-Country course like they were supposed to.    

 

After that he kind of gave up and actually banned me from his class.   Like I gave a stuff.    

 

A few years later I met him in my job at the ferry port - he was trying to book his holiday and had been given a massive run-around on the phone.   I sorted it out for him and he recognised me, shook my hand and said "You didn't like games very much, did you?"   Nice bloke really, not the height-restricted shouting bully he had been at school....

[AlabamaShrimp]

Well it sounds like I had pretty much the same experience as everyone else with PE at school as well as strongly suspecting that the teacher was a pedo as he'd line all the new kids up in the shower and get them to say their name.

 

Twat was also head of year for the 4th and 5th form and as he didn't like me decided that I should change class for two years meaning I just about fucked everything up

 

Ah well years ago now and hopefully he's either dead or in a lot of pain

[Craig the Princess]

Mowed the lawn for the first time this year on Tuesday. Noticed the grass was smoking in one spot but ignored it and carried on. A bit later the exhaust fell off, at this point I worked out it was the first bolt faking off which caused the smoke. Can I find the fucker now? Hi chance.

 

So I need to mow again today (only took the worst of it off) so am almost guaranteed to mow the bolt to destruction.

[NorfolkNWeigh]

Just dropped off my V70 at the Main Dealer, to try to shut up the stupid warning that the handbrake isn't releasing properly. Apparently none of the people I use want to touch it.

Anyway, I was walking home feeling pissed off and feeling sorry for myself when I got a call. A good client and someone I now realise was a friend was killed in an accident yesterday, to make matters worse so was his wife.

Just thinking about their kids and how no matter how much money you have it just isn't important in the grand scheme of things.

So when my own family piss me off or I bemoan not having a yacht, mansion or Bentley, I'll take a second and thank whatever entity is responsible for this sort of shit ( that I don't believe in) that they've chosen to let me carry on.

[HMC]

One of our PE teachers whilst I was at secondary school (91-96) was this bloke...

 

By then white haired we had no idea he was former manager of Blackburn rovers/ Newcastle united in the 70s

[Craig the Princess]

What engine does the mower have? I likely cchave a spare bolt to suit if its some variant of Briggs & Stratton

 

Oooh. It is a Briggs and Stratton 35 classic. The other bolt looks like this...

[beko1987]

It's fupping pay day and bonus month, and my debit card seems to not be working now... it did before lunch! I just want to buy stuff!!! On hold now whilst Brian from bangalore has a chat to the relevant department...

[beko1987]

It's fupping pay day and bonus month, and my debit card seems to not be working now... it did before lunch! I just want to buy stuff!!! On hold now whilst Brian from bangalore has a chat to the relevant department...

All fixed! Brian passed me over to Shiela from Barnsley, we had a laugh going through the 22 paypal transactions from today and all is well again!

[Craig the Princess]

Yeah, PM me your address and I'll post you one this weekend.

This place etc... ðŸ˜

[Craig the Princess]

 

Anyway, I was walking home feeling pissed off and feeling sorry for myself when I got a call. A good client and someone I now realise was a friend was killed in an accident yesterday, to make matters worse so was his wife.

Just thinking about their kids and how no matter how much money you have it just isn't important in the grand scheme of things.

 

Sorry to hear that NNW, that is a terrible thing.

[scaryoldcortina]

All fixed! Brian passed me over to Shiela from Barnsley, we had a laugh going through the 22 paypal transactions from today and all is well again!

 

 

That's quite a few raffle tickets...

[robinmasters]

That ebay advert where the recruitment consultant called Tristan or something equally Tristan-y tells us how to prepare for an MOT. 'So when I prep for an not I check that my tyre depths are correct, my windscreen isn't cracked, my wet blades work, all the light bulbs work on the car, check there's plenty of fuel and oil, and you're good to go'. Bellend. That's all there is to an MOT; ad's how many over-filling incidents has the 'plenty' of oil comment caused. I'm not even going to mention his starting a sentence with 'So,'. That.

 

He also appears in another advert for them. 'My brake light keeps going. You can't change the bulb, so take out the old unit, pop in a new one, job done.'. No checking why it 'keeps' failing. I suppose it means he had to keep buying replacements from eBay as he hasn't bothered to find the cause.

 

It's not so much the content, is presenting people as experts when there clearly not. 'We asked this scientician...'.

 

EDIT: Oh, and the man fitting LED headlights to his Mini. His bulbs might be legal, but 99% of the ones sold on eBay aren't.

[DodgeRover]

And the musical air horn? MOT fail there unless fitted with another horn or not working properly - likely with ebay

[adw1977]

check there's plenty of fuel

I've taken cars for MOT in the past with the minimum possible amount of fuel, so if it fails spectacularly then it doesn't go to the scrapyard with a full tank!

[richardmorris]

That ebay advert where the recruitment consultant called Tristan or something equally Tristan-y tells us how to prepare for an MOT. 'So when I prep for an not I check that my tyre depths are correct, my windscreen isn't cracked, my wet blades work, all the light bulbs work on the car, check there's plenty of fuel and oil, and you're good to go'. Bellend. That's all there is to an MOT; ad's how many over-filling incidents has the 'plenty' of oil comment caused. I'm not even going to mention his starting a sentence with 'So,'. That.He also appears in another advert for them. 'My brake light keeps going. You can't change the bulb, so take out the old unit, pop in a new one, job done.'. No checking why it 'keeps' failing. I suppose it means he had to keep buying replacements from eBay as he hasn't bothered to find the cause.It's not so much the content, is presenting people as experts when there clearly not. 'We asked this scientician...'.EDIT: Oh, and the man fitting LED headlights to his Mini. His bulbs might be legal, but 99% of the ones sold on eBay aren't.

 

It depends on the age of the car too. Whether your car is homologated with specific bulb requirements etc. I think pre 1986 is ok.

 

Also the eBay ad person with the new rad in his Range Rover. You only need a viscous coupling spanner if you have a viscous fan. Cheap ads.

[anonymous user]

Does anyone know how to disable the invisibility cloak on a Land Rover 90? I didn't realise it was fitted and there must be a hidden switch, I'm getting fed up with people trying to kill me. It's not just the ones who pull out in front, or the pedestrians who step out in front, but now includes the ones who cut in front ( almost taking the wing off) and the ones who try to drive into the side coming up slip roads. I experienced a new version today when I was part way around a roundabout and a bright green something just drove straight onto the roundabout, my only option to avoid the collision was to yank the wheel sharply an continue back around the roundabout. I thought I was going to tip over and I'm convinced I had wheels off the ground. This was the closest it's been and I literally felt sick afterwards, I think I have pulled a muscle as my arm and chest are still painful. I'm not sure whether to get a florescent green wrap for the Land Rover, or to go for a bull-bar.

[dollywobbler]

Ah, perhaps this explains the One Lifers. Be safe. Be seen! Chequer plate is reflective.

[sheffcortinacentre]

Bull bar.