The grumpy thread

[320touring]

This is my 9th day of trying to buy a pushbike that's 3/4 mile from my house.

Day 10 should see you invoke the ghost of Fagan

[dugong]

I've just moved to Chester and can't sell my pushbike.

 

REALLY ANNOYED.

[Cavcraft]

LOLZ

[oldcars]

So this happened yesterday. Pulling left into a parking space in Tescos, a silly cow decided to undertake me and subsequently stuff her VW UP! into the side of my works Crafter.

 

Problem is, I'm working up in SVMland and need to drive myself, a member of staff and most of the event equipment back that afternoon. Seems in the shunt the wheel took the brunt of the impact, so a bent track rod, strut, and rather clunky steering rack means that the van ends up being recovered and I have to hire a van to get back. My van is needed in three days for another event, and it seems it's still in Scotland. Fucksticks. 

 

 

photo 1.JPGphoto 4.JPGphoto 3.JPGphoto 2.JPG

Up driver to go to prison, even if its only for that shite plate.

[Mr_Bo11ox]

Agree, the plate alone is enough to tell you all you need to know about the dozy old boot

[cort16]

Seeds in grapes. What's the point unless I want to grow a vinyard, which I don't?. Science defeated the seeded grape years ago so why sell them? I  nearly choked on the flippin seeds as I gleefully wolfed down what I think is a seedless grape in the safe grape zone category.

[UmBongo]

Illegal plate equals retard alert!

[barefoot]

Fucking postman.

I am convinced the bloke waits for the very moment I nip out for milk or similar and then promptly arrives, fails to be able to get it through the letter box and unlike every other delivery outfit on the planet, cant leave it with any of the countless elderly, retired folk in the street, cant leave it in my garage and lock it up behind him but insists on taking it back to the post office where I cant collect it for 24 hours.

If he's not doing this, he stuffs a card through to tell me I wasn't in when I was.

I'm a nice bloke, I get on with most folk. Most of the posties will leave it somewhere for me, but not Bob the parcel.

My question is; how can I persuade him to leave it somewhere helpful?

Or, how can I irritate the cock until he wants to smash everything of mine into a million bits?

Or something constructive

[bub2006]

Bonnet release cable snapped on punto. Could I hell as like get to bolts holding catch down and cable had snapped bonnet side not near catch. Resorted in using a crow bar to pry up leading edge of bonnet. Now have a creased bonnet and a bit of cable hanging down to pop it open. A journey to Albert looms beckons.

[Cavcraft]

Bonnet release cable snapped on punto. Could I hell as like get to bolts holding catch down and cable had snapped bonnet side not near catch. Resorted in using a crow bar to pry up leading edge of bonnet. Now have a creased bonnet and a bit of cable hanging down to pop it open. A journey to Albert looms beckons.

 

 

It'd be cheaper to pay £4 and (potentially) win a complete car.

[Noel Tidybeard]

It'd be cheaper to pay £4 and (potentially) win a donor car.

FIFY

[bub2006]

To be honest I am tempted but also very broke. The bonus is though cav is your car is a 5 door so I could strip it and put sunroof,bonnet etc on my motor and weigh in the rest

[AlabamaShrimp]

Arse! What again started out as a small hole below the indicator turned into this with a little poking. Didn't help I kicked the bottom of the wing sitting down and it's all popped away from the front panel.

 

[cms206]

I bloody hate funerals.

[vulgalour]

Funerals are shit, that's why there's alcohol at the wake.

[Cavcraft]

I had to go on something called a 'bus' today. Is it the law that of the other passengers one has to smell of piss, three look like the kind of people who'd stab you to death with a blunt elastic band and about 53% of them have snivelling colds and coughs? Also ONE POUND AND NINETY PENCE to go a couple of miles.

[PhilA]

Fanbelt $5.19

 

Shipping $5.39

[jakebullet]

The road round the back of the house is single track. I drop the Ma off at the wider bit, and then I have to reverse to get into my parking bit. My idiot neighbours think it's a top idea to drive to 1/2 inch from my rear bumper and lean on the horn. So I stick it in reverse and wait for them to move out of my way so I can park. Dozy bint doesn't move a bastard inch, just starts leaning on the horn more in a don't squash my kia shitbox sort of way. Fine. I move forwards and as close to the edge as I can. They then play squeeze down the side, windscreen full of conifers because it's not wide enough for 2 cars. More horn, more evil eye. Stupid bitches.

 

TL DR:

Kia picantos are driven by fuckwits. (my sister has 1 too. QED).

[beko1987]

Was playing with the slop in the accelerator pedal stuck in traffic on the Bypass earlier and managed to pop the clip off...

 

Luckily the traffic was crawling anyway so I carried on with tick over aiming for the layby further up. Traffic started moving...

 

Bumped up onto the verge, got out, round to the passenger side, laid over the seats and clipped it back in. Then I took several months off the front tyres by doing 0 to 45 in about 3 seconds to rejoin, once joined the traffic stopped again.

[Tayne]

 

 

 

Oh dear, there you were minding your own business in your van when Bang Bang, the Dark Lady drove into you.

One By One, you counted the broken components and realised you were a Prisoner up here in SVM land.

If I Could Turn Back Time I'd have stopped this happening.

Hopefully the hire van will be a Dead Ringer (for your van) as you have Many Rivers To Cross to get home but be wary of leaving your van.

A band of Gypsies, Tramps & Thieves might strip your van for parts, Just Like Jesse James.

[alf892]

The road round the back of the house is single track. I drop the Ma off at the wider bit, and then I have to reverse to get into my parking bit. My idiot neighbours think it's a top idea to drive to 1/2 inch from my rear bumper and lean on the horn. So I stick it in reverse and wait for them to move out of my way so I can park. Dozy bint doesn't move a bastard inch, just starts leaning on the horn more in a don't squash my kia shitbox sort of way. Fine. I move forwards and as close to the edge as I can. They then play squeeze down the side, windscreen full of conifers because it's not wide enough for 2 cars. More horn, more evil eye. Stupid bitches.

 

TL DR:

Kia picantos are driven by fuckwits. (my sister has 1 too. QED).

Solution:

Switch off car,get out and lock it. Slowly.

Ask impatient twat to give you a shout when they are feeling more reasonable

Retire to your house.

[EssDeeWon]

Road tested the 75 yesterday, its running at about 102*C and no life from the cooling fan which should have kicked in by then....Having it linked up to a T4 diagnostics on Friday but i'm fairly certain I know what the outcome will be. Front of the car off and new fan please.

 

On the plus side once this is done that is one of the more common 75 faults ticked off and sorted.

[andy18s]

Solution:

Switch off car,get out and lock it. Slowly.

Ask impatient twat to give you a shout when they are feeling more reasonable

Retire to your house.

^^ This,just make sure to leave the car "Just so" so no-one can get past

[richardmorris]

GO HOME IONA

Dozy womble with an illegal number plate.

[richardmorris]

I had to go on something called a 'bus' today. Is it the law that of the other passengers one has to smell of piss, three look like the kind of people who'd stab you to death with a blunt elastic band and about 53% of them have snivelling colds and coughs? Also ONE POUND AND NINETY PENCE to go a couple of miles.

My parents like the new Wrexham to Chester buses- large comfortable seats, free wifi and usb chargers and they can have a glass of wine with lunch without needing to drive home. The bus stop is outside their house too and it's free for them.

 

I have to say though, Easter Saturday when I drove them and my godmother to Chester for dinner was a revelation. I didn't know people got drunk at 7pm to wander the streets in high heels ( not the men; they were too busy looking hard in t-shirts ) in Chester.

[Junkman]

I'm sick and tired of people referring to stuff from the 90s as "vintage".

It isn't "vintage". It's newfangled tosh!

[HillmanImp]

The cutting discs I got the other day from Screwfix are proper wank. They will only last about a foot or so before they are fucked. 

 

Going to get some more tomorrow but does anyone have any particular recommendations for some that are actually made of stronger stuff than the metal I am cutting. It was Ebaur 125 x 2.5 x 22.2 which have been fine in the past but they were sodding awful this time.

[purplebargeken]

Hmm, ADHD and Aspergers assessments round my neck of the woods takes about 3 weeks on average to arrange. 

 

No idea what mental health services are like round your way but here once assessed and told you have Aspergers there is feck all that is offered after that. You might be lucky and have a social services team but don't hold your breath. You might be best getting in touch with the Aspergers Society in the interim. 

[cobblers]

The cutting discs I got the other day from Screwfix are proper wank. They will only last about a foot or so before they are fucked. 

 

Going to get some more tomorrow but does anyone have any particular recommendations for some that are actually made of stronger stuff than the metal I am cutting. It was Ebaur 125 x 2.5 x 22.2 which have been fine in the past but they were sodding awful this time.

I always bought bluespot/klingspor when I was using a couple of dozen a month, they seemed to last as well as each other, and a lot better than silverline etc.

 

Oh, in the end I started buying Dronco as well, they seemed slightly better.

[messerschmitt owner]

re cutting discs - i have come to the conclusion that a reciprocating saw is probaby better than an angle grinder for big 2mm panels!