The grumpy thread

[dollywobbler]

There was a reason I refused to live in Peterborough when I worked there. Several actually!

[dugong]

There was a reason I refused to live in Peterborough when I worked there. Several actually!

 

The constant, half-arsed littering is getting on my tits as well.

[Cavcraft]

They (cyclists) do it to other cyclists too. I actually like it when they ride towards me on my side of the bike path and expect me to move, they can go and FLIP themselves, yo.

My favourite ever was some old duffer and his wife riding right at me and him shouting to her 'don't move, don't move out of his way' but she lost the game of chicken. As her husband drew level I suggested he may well like to copulate off and hoped for some form of reaction so I could turn round and boot him off, but he just rode away sheepishly.

 

 

Anyhow, to counter all the bleeding moaning, I saw a really rusty 2004 Mk4 Golf today.

[Station]

What's the deal with station sounding like Jerry Seinfeld's stand up?

 

 

I nearly went to see him in Birmingham in 2012, I think he's very funny but not sure about his stand up, haha.

[Lord Sterling]

Well, looks like my dream of a 3.5 V6 barge isn't going to happen. The car in question was a Renault Vel Satis, turns out the things needs a new transmission.

 

Yeah, I know R9UkE is selling one but I don't want a Dr_Weasel.

 

I'll do up and sell the fucking the Coupe, sell it and walk from now on

 

Also, dole_dossing_cousin seems to be doing alright for himself, certainly better than me. He's just bought a 54-plate 1.6 Zafira (which are shit, I know....) thats in a nice clean condition. He paid £1600, which is more than doubke what I've ever paid for any car I've ever had.

[retrogeezer]

Not much chance of the rozzers doing anything about it Jon, some wanker nearly knocked me over riding around a blind corner at speed a while back. There was a copper on the path a few feet behind me that saw it all and did nothing as guess what? He was on a bike too! 

[HH-R]

I hope all this OUTRAGE!!111eleven about a sabotaged baked alaska has blown over by tomorrow, it was seriously tedious listening on the radio every five minutes.

[UmBongo]

They (cyclists) do it to other cyclists too. I actually like it when they ride towards me on my side of the bike path and expect me to move, they can go and FLIP themselves, yo.

My favourite ever was some old duffer and his wife riding right at me and him shouting to her 'don't move, don't move out of his way' but she lost the game of chicken. As her husband drew level I suggested he may well like to copulate off and hoped for some form of reaction so I could turn round and boot him off, but he just rode away sheepishly.

 

 

 

Probably the first time he's been on a bike since the age of twelve.

 

Dopey old twonker.

[UmBongo]

Cyclists who ride the wrong way down the one way street outside my place of work.

 

In the dark...without lights...without helmet...wearing high heeled shoes...stupid boot.

[UmBongo]

Fat foghorn at my work who stated without any trace of irony that she throws litter from her car window because 'it gives the council something to do'.

 

So when one of your massive brood of rugrats falls on to a used needle in the park and contracts HIV, don't blame the fooking council.

[UmBongo]

What's the deal with station sounding like Jerry Seinfeld's stand up?

 

 

Station's much funnier than this twat, with his overbite and 1990's coloured blazer.

[Cheggers]

Blimey Bongo, got the painters in??

 

 

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[vulgalour]

This could lead to a serious diminution in global tat levels...

 

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-28970130

 

Seems somehow appropriate that the woman in the photograph looks like she's trying to find somewhere to vomit discretely.

[UmBongo]

Fatties who park too close to my car and then squeeze their bulk out while their door rests against my car's trim.

[UmBongo]

Most of my favourite authors are dead.

 

They'll never write again!

[UmBongo]

Indians called James and Angus who tell me that my PC has a virus and they can fix it.

 

''But I don't have a PC, James.''

 

''Yes you do, Mr UmBongo.''

 

''No. I don't.''

 

''You must have one.''

 

ETC ETC...

 

Also, that dopey bint who always leaves interminable messages on my phone about a house insulation grant or summat.

[UmBongo]

A well known actor like Gary Busey doing CBB with all the Z listers and hermaphrodites desperate for media attention.

 

Does he really need the money that badly?

[UmBongo]

Blimey Bongo, got the painters in??

 

 

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

 

Cheggers, watch out because Yewtree are desperate for more celeb scalps.

 

It is you isn't it, Cheggers?

 

One of the TV icons from my childhood and brother of Janice Long?

[maxpower]

Fkin teenage layabouts who threw eggs at missus car and scared the shit outta her.... do it when i'm driving you twunts and you will be wearing  a wheel brace as a fkin hat 

[Richard]

A well known actor like Gary Busey doing CBB with all the Z listers and hermaphrodites desperate for media attention.

 

 

Who? I've Googled him and I still don't know who he is.

[Cavcraft]

He's got a brother called Hiya who rides Suzukis and an uncle called Childa, who lives in Rotherham.

[Cheggers]

Cheggers, watch out because Yewtree are desperate for more celeb scalps.

 

It is you isn't it, Cheggers?

 

One of the TV icons from my childhood and brother of Janice Long?

I am me, but maybe not the me you think I am...I mean I am Cheggers, but not THE Cheggers. My only connection with Janice Long is a drunken night in Cleethorpes now lost in the mists of time. I recall she was a bit like a Korean car; surprisingly good, but you wouldn't want your mates to see you in it.

 

Anyways, I'm not him, but that doesn't stop me shitting myself about Yewtree.

 

 

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[UmBongo]

This could lead to a serious diminution in global tat levels...

 

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-28970130

 

 

Granta is the Russki word for shite.

 

óрðýтð

[Lankytim]

Youve fucked Janice Long? She lives opposite my dad in Birmingham, want me to say hi?

[Cheggers]

You could ask if she's still got one of my socks...

 

 

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[RobT]

A well known actor like Gary Busey doing CBB with all the Z listers and hermaphrodites desperate for media attention.

 

Does he really need the money that badly?

 

His royalties from Under Siege probably not enough to keep him going...

[Parky]

Three interviews for a company where I used to work and have a good reputation for a job I could do blindfolded and they give it to someone with a fraction of my experience. That's very, very annoying.

 

However receiving an email from the MD, and then a separate one from the compliance officer ten minutes later reminds me of how senior management didn't communicate with the staff and there was a definite arse and elbow disconnect. So perhaps it's not all bad but it would have been a nice easy transition for all concerned.

 

Hey ho, back to pretending to be intelligent, charming, diligent, and competent in front of strangers. Hooray!

[NorfolkNWeigh]

The Mayor of Milton Keynes and two other councillors have resigned after it turns out the Mayor pleaded for a 6 time convicted sex offender and rapist to be given a cab licence . Turns out we've got 6 other convicted sex offenders with licenses too. So much for CRB or Disclosure checks or whatever I have to pay for every 3 years.

Mrs N who works in the council Social Services says everyone's shitting themselves and no one under 18 is being sent in a Taxi by the council un chaperoned , looks like Rotherham could be having a widespread effect.

Although anyone involved in the Hackney or Private Hire trade anywhere in the country probably won't be that amazed.

[Richard]

Don't you have to have a CRB check before you're allowed to carry schoolkids anyway? They brought that in here when I was driving taxis 20 years ago.

[cms206]

Don't you have to have a CRB check before you're allowed to carry schoolkids anyway? They brought that in here when I was driving taxis 20 years ago.

We've got to go through a PVG check every three years for school buses with the PTE, used to be an enhanced disclosure but they swem to have done away with that now.