What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[Sloth in a bowl]

Proper belly laugh today at work. My new gaffer in doing odds and sods and Decker Dave Fowler in tinkering with the SVM Command Centre.

 

Gaffer: "How you getting on with the railway?"

DF2K: "Not too bad, drove a train for a bit on a live line today."

Gaffer: "Ach you'll be fine. At least you can't deroof a train".

 

Spat juice all over the yard. DF2K didn't find it so funny.

 

 

Try driving a full size train through the tunnel to Hastings.

[cms206]

Try driving a full size train through the tunnel to Hastings.

He tried to drive a Leyland Titan through a twelve foot bridge.

 

Well, I say try... he did get most of it through.

[Pillock]

Apparently if you send a full size train down the branch from Llanelli, you can indeed have a good go at deroofing them.

 

 

They modified a fleet of class 08 shunters to take about 6" out of the roof so they fit. That one above was sent to rescue a stricken low-roof one and nobody thought to check.....

[Sloth in a bowl]

He tried to drive a Leyland Titan through a twelve foot bridge.

 

Well, I say try... he did get most of it through.

 

 

This is what I think of when I hear Leyland Titan

 

 

 

 

 

Though I have traveled on one of these as even in the mid 80's Southdowns had one as a 'feck, everything else is broken' bus

 

[cms206]

This is what I think of when I hear Leyland Titan

 

 

 

 

 

Though I have traveled on one of these as even in the mid 80's Southdowns had one as a 'feck, everything else is broken' bus

 

This 'un is closer to the mark... this actual one in fact.

[Inspector Morose]

This is what I think of when I hear Leyland Titan

 

 

 

 

That's an ex Doncaster trolleybus body, that is.

 

Sorry, I can't help it.

[Slappy]

Moaned previously about restructures and whatnot. Well a neighbouring organisation is advertising some positions including something that is right street so much I may as well have surveyed, designed and built the cul-de-sac myself! With a substantial wage rise too no less (between 25 and 50% higher!).

 

It would be awesome if I get this of course, would nicely turn around a couple of "wasted" years with exes and whatnot, and I might finally be able to afford to get a project car!

[hairnet]

train to edinburgh next friday 36 quid return

 

train to stockton next friday 55 quid return

 

wtf??

[steve_earwig]

My bro has an ageing* Zafira (2006 CDTi) he wants to get rid of. It was originally our dad's but he couldn't get on with its hard suspension and rubber band tyres. My sis-in-law never got on with all its blind spots and now she has a Honda Jism as it's kinder to her back. My bro now has a (hoik, spit) Puss hat, so the Zaff is surplus. Thing is, it's been in the family since new and low miles but he's looked up the value and it's almost worthless.

 

My cousin's had a bad time of it, starting with his wife going all soap opera on him, kicking him out and making off with their kids. He's not got a pot to piss in and for work he has to drive about 150 miles a day in an old XM (2.1 ATE I think, not seen the bugger in years) so my brother's offered him the Zaff.

 

Guess what he said, go on

[Parky]

Did he say "yes please, they are a paragon of reliability and quality with driving pleasure unmatched in Stuttgart or Modena"?

[twosmoke300]

You can have the xm? Or he'd rather have the xm than a zafira

[steve_earwig]

What would my brother do with an XM? Nah, my cousin told him to poke the Zafira. I guess he's too honest to say "thank you very much" and then flog it for veg money.

[steve_earwig]

ai least 25p? Wow! I've also been offered said vehicle but I don't want to pay more than the car's worth to import it and still have the steering wheel on the wrong side.

[catsinthewelder]

That reminds me, I was tinkering with the Cherry the other day when a nobhead neighbour pulls up in his Picasso. He couldn't wait to tell me

that he was getting a new C3 so would I like to buy the Picasso?

 

He wasn't too impressed with the response of "not even for free".

[D Spares & Tyres]

Was it a blue 02 plate by any chance? Fat bloke?

[alf892]

Great day.........got stuff done on truck. Thread update to follow

 

Now beer.........and special treat from wench............pot of fresh anchovies. Noms......

[outlaw118]

Night out last night with Mr & Mrs Inconsistant & my (t)rusty sidekick Blind Trevor to "An Evening with Devin Townsend".

 

Awesome gig, GR9 company.

 

Something about gay beards happened.

[NorfolkNWeigh]

Great day.........got stuff done on truck. Thread update to follow

Now beer.........and special treat from wench............pot of fresh anchovies. Noms......

Is that some sort of euphemism ?

[alf892]

No......had a fuck earlier. Didn't like to mention it

[Pillock]

Seems some enterprising soul has taken a pair of Mk1 and Mk2 Escort shells into China, had them measured up, and now there's a factory popping out replicas.

 

http://www.turbosport.co.uk/showthread.php?t=155462is a thread from 2010 planning it all out

http://www.turbosport.co.uk/showthread.php?t=825965is this year......

 

Responses seem to be everything from "Wow, yeah, I'll have one" to "no, this is a terrible idea". Guess which camp the folk who have bought a battered £15k Mk2 fall in to?

[fred]

**BREAKING NEWS****

 

 

Odd Bloke Has Vulgalours ''Cursed one'' Trailered up ready for the pain!!!! - He loves it!!

 

 

 

BL World Rejoiced - Allegros leaped for joy!

[Station]

Seems some enterprising soul has taken a pair of Mk1 and Mk2 Escort shells into China, had them measured up, and now there's a factory popping out replicas.

 

http://www.turbosport.co.uk/showthread.php?t=155462is a thread from 2010 planning it all out

http://www.turbosport.co.uk/showthread.php?t=825965is this year......

 

Responses seem to be everything from "Wow, yeah, I'll have one" to "no, this is a terrible idea". Guess which camp the folk who have bought a battered £15k Mk2 fall in to?

 

 

That wouldn't surprise me, and is a good idea. It sounds fishy though.

[Pillock]

Apparently, they're real and there's photos of them being delivered to Ireland.

5 years is a long time to keep a joke running too. But there's some proper rivet sniffers on that site complaining that there's too many differences between different years of Mk2s..... and then they go and mention that Ford themselves used to supply "service shells" that were just an average of all the different shells, used to reshell cars when it was a current model.

[catsinthewelder]

Was it a blue 02 plate by any chance? Fat bloke?

 

No a maroon 54 plate with a skinny guy that also has a Harley Davidson,  Glyn or Glen or summut like that.

[inconsistant]

Awesome gig, GR9 company.

 

+1

 

[anonymous user]

Well at least those new escort shells will finally see a use for all those vin plates that turn up on eBay. Are they doing van ones?

[purplebargeken]

Wish they'd do Dolomite shells

[NorfolkNWeigh]

Been looking on eBay for some Merc wheels and I've discovered there are many,many ways to spell the simple word kerbed.

Curbed

Kurbed

Cerbed

Kerbd

Kurd ( seriously)

Cirbed

Kirbed.

As for staggered ,well I'm completely Stagared.

[chaseracer]

^ Only gud for spears & repears, m8.

[vulgalour]

Yay, OKK still looks as terrible as ever!  Jealous at the suspension level there.