What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[Cavcraft]

Sod the eBay thread, this is far too good for that...

 

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/LE-MANS-CARLS ... 5517939771

 

[Guest]

Sod the eBay thread, this is far too good for that...

 

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/LE-MANS-CARLS ... 5517939771

 

 

[eddyramrod]

If you look up "abortion" in the dictionary, there'll be a snap of that... But, somebody must have liked it, to build it in the first place. No accounting for taste...

[CreepingJesus]

Actually that Carlsberg-libra does make me grin. There's a bit of me (which presumably feeds on self-loathing) which would.

There's two problems with it: 1)That hood's hellish, and 2)It'll be the better part of 2 tons, so the inevitable traffic light GP's won't work out well. Even against an Aixam.

[Negative Creep]

NOT, BUGATTI, FARARI,PORSCHE,LOTUS,ZONDA, ASTON MARTIN

 

Thanks for clearing that one up.

[Cavcraft]

'If Carlsberg made cars... they'd have had to have drunk 97 gallons of their piss weak lager to even think this would look good'

[Cheggers]

Mmmmm...bikes

 

my trusty steed:

 

[cort16]

Sod the eBay thread, this is far too good for that...

 

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/LE-MANS-CARLS ... 5517939771

 

 

 

 

That it so horrific I was hoping for some a hint of irony somewhere in the ebay advert. I didn't find any.

[messerschmitt owner]

calibra convertible +

= world a better place

[Guest]

The world would be a slightly better place if the pikeys were still sat in that Transit when it was crushed

[CIH]

NOT, BUGATTI, FARARI,PORSCHE,LOTUS,ZONDA, ASTON MARTIN

 

 

YOU. DON'T. SAY.

[Guest]

Get Rory to set fire to it for me

[Angrydicky]

I'm grinning because I'm up in Wuvvum's n

eck of the woods and the whole area is a serious tatfest! Within 5 minutes of here I've found a Trabant, rusty 2cv and an early minimetro going rusty in a front garden. There are also a whole load of giffer owned 1980's saloons in the area.

 

(Also my first post on Autoshite via a phone ~ it's really hard work!)

[loserone]

SWMBO has finally decided that there are enough coats of paint on our £12 Chef, and it's in use making cakes!

 

Probably best of all is that the slight smell has vanished after a few minutes use. The motor wasn't a pleasant job to clean out!

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

Ooh, metal Kenwood Chef? Was recently given a 90s one for free, the whole top part is plastic. Cleaned up nice enough though.

 

Keeping to the Applianceshite theme, I got my coffee machine working. Replacement flow meter and a violent descaling did the trick.

[eddyramrod]

Thought I'd "listen live" to Radio 2 this morning instead of crappy local station. Lo and behold, Blondie performing live on Ken Bruce's show! I picked the right day!

[Cavcraft]

Ken Bruce=R2's finest listening imho. Got 21 'virtual' points on Pop Master today too.

[cms206]

This might only be funny if you're from north of the border.

 

 

 

Excellent - I was saddened to see this had disappeared, but I've now downloaded to make sure it'll make me chortle for some time to come...

[Pete-M]

Never Say Never Again car chase.

[warren t claim]

Never Say Never Again car chase.

 

This one contains better Frog chod.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TUOaAQQE ... re=related

[garethj]

Reading this made me grin

 

 

the bEEb turned down my idea on 'Total Wipeout'. I was calling it 'Total Wankout' and the events included:

 

Pringle Tube Volcano

 

I'm not in love, and you'll need a lot more than 10cc to fill a Pringle tube up with junk-juice...but that's the contest: You have to wank into an empty tube of Pringles for as many times as it takes to fill it up and then ram your fist as hard and deep as you can in to the tube. This will cause the spaff to shoot out...and the winner is the person who gets theirs the furthest.

 

Bukake Duck Shoot

 

The contestant has to dress up like a duck with a target on their belly. They then hide behind a wall and jump up every...oooh I dunno....15 minutes. On the other side of the wall are the players of Stevenage Borough Football club all rubbing one out. The winning duck is the one who is covered in the least amount of ball-butter.

 

"Shutupp a ya face"

 

For this one, all the contestants have to kneel down in a circle with their mouths open. Pornographic film actors then lower their flesh anchors into the mouths of the contestants, and taped to the stomachs of these actors is a scene from popular Police drama, Juliet Bravo. The contestants are then all given roles to read and the first person to miss their cue is out...and so on until they've all either mucked up or got muck down their throat. When they leave, it's to Joe Dolce's classic ditty.

 

15 to bum

 

Like the daytime quiz show but with a twist: each contestant is bent over a stool and asked a general knowledge quiz question. If they get it wrong, they get it up the wrong 'un. If they don't shout 'wank' in time, they get inserted. You lose when you either get voted off or you get full up of gonad-goo.

 

The final challenge

 

By this stage, we should be down to 3. The final challenge involves getting the three left into a pair of tight fitting y-fronts. They then have to sit on a bumpy bus journey, a tube ride from Ealing Broadway to Edgeware road and (if they make it this far) a camel as it competes in the 110m hurdle. The one who goes the longest without creaming his briefs wins.

[Cavcraft]

/\

 

That post was bought to you by Cooking Sherry.

[outlaw118]

Cheers, there has just been a breakfast/screen interface.

You will receive your invoice shortly.

[Cavcraft]

PHEW!

 

Just took my ace mechanic neighbour down to the MOT place to check out why the Frontender was overheating. Turned out to be a fubard inline fuse for the electric fan. Fuse binned, water topped up and all is well. Fan kicks in/goes out as it should do so we'll see what happens later.

[Rod/b]

Finding out that me and a large group of mates will be arriving in Brasov at the end of a banger rally, smack in the middle of the annual 4 day Oktoberfest.

[Cavcraft]

Are you driving an Omega with a carboard tank turret glued to the roof and some 'whacky' name stencilled down the sides?

[Rod/b]

No, a Saab 900 Turbo that is currently blue, white and flames. But won't be in August.

[face]

The Lonely Island

[John F]

Swapped a Calibra power steering rack in 6 hours on Sat afternoon / Sunday, after the MoT garage owner told me it would take at least 15 hours and I'd be lucky to get it done that weekend. It made me smile calling him first thing Monday morning for the re-test.

[Negative Creep]

A very nice, and vitally needed, tax rebate has arrived on my doorstep this morning. Plus the BMW now has an MOT so I can plan on selling it