One Banana Two Banana

[quicksilver]

An interesting topic that's got me thinking. I've concluded that Autoshite is really its own culture and a very broad one at that. We've got people who will happily invest huge amounts of time, effort and money completely restoring cars that would never be financially worthwhile, but on the other hand there are those who live by the bangernomics philosophy of buying something cheap and running it for minimum outlay, and everything in between. The one thing everyone has in common is the love of an alternative non-conformist lifestyle and the satisfaction of doing things differently even if other people don't understand why they do it.

 

Looking at what we've got on the drive now, nothing could really be considered mainstream and I guess that's the point.

Zafira: yes it was a modern that cost a substantial sum when we bought it but that was 15 years ago and it's paid for itself now. Ostensibly it's just a worthless old banger but it's worth more to us as a known quantity than its minuscule financial value. Not really bangernomics as it's a been a long-term keeper so with this one it's really a case of preservation.

Maxi: nice enough to hold its own at shows but not so shiny we're scared to use it as a car. Some people would have gone to town giving it a full restoration and yes a lot of work has been done but it's all really tinkering: making sensible upgrades, replacing things that were past their best because better ones are available and leaving the good bits alone. I guess I'd describe what's happened here as enhancement.

Renault: an interesting one I'd describe as a revival or maybe a Renaultvation It's getting all the work it needs to make it roadworthy but we have no plans to do much more than that and the dents and brush paint will remain intact. There are people who would see a car like this as a complete restoration project and strip it right down but although salvageable it's so far removed from original condition it just isn't worth the effort to return it to factory finish.

 

That's a bit of a ramble, but in short - what is Autoshite? It's just, well, Autoshite, a car-centric way of life that makes its followers happy but others might not understand.

[Parky]

Reverend, in an emergency wet braking situation I would wager you'll have a better chance than a three year old 1 series on Ling Longs but with minty rear arches.

 

More importantly the errant pedestrian you miss isn't gonna give a crap about your cosmetic rust.

[Bren]

Keeping someyhing going for as little as possible but doing it as well as possible.

 

Unfortunately it is getting more difficult. The cockroach cars - cavalier, corolla have no modern equivalent. Modern cars are delicate by comparison, they depreciate like all old cars but parts are still expensive and labour will always be expensive.

 

I predict running a 2017 focus / bmw in nine or ten years will be something of a challenge.

[sierraman]

Not sure if will. People said to me in about 2000 ish forget running a Mondeo on a shoestring what with its fuel injection and £600 clutch changes.

[Dick Cheeseburger]

For me, it's always ignoring the good ones, and automatically taking on the sad looking underdog, with the aim of getting it back to being a good one again.

It's an expensive character flaw.

[Bren]

Keeping someyhing going for as little as possible but doing it as well as possible.

Unfortunately it is getting more difficult. The cockroach cars - cavalier, corolla have no modern equivalent. Modern cars are delicate by comparison, they depreciate like all old cars but parts are still expensive and labour will always be expensive.

I predict running a 2017 focus / bmw in nine or ten years will be something of a challenge.

Also, you have to consider lots of workshops are not interested in getting bogged down with involved jobs on moderns.

[Parky]

I have just been trawling through spares or repairs on Ebay. Near me I have found a nice looking Alfa 156 which has had a lot of work but is now losing water. Could probably sort that but the terrible ad puts me off. If you can't spell Cambelt....or valves

 

Some spares or repairs Fiestas with crusty arches but otherwise OK for silly money. Like a meal for two in London kind of money. And lots of Scenics, Clios and Puntos which all look as if they have life in them.

 

Does anyone else do this? Look for potential projects to think about doing up? And do people do this with other things like Fridges or Tumble Dryers (excepting Beko and hoovers)?

 

As I said before, we seem to be wired differently. I notice a lot of us have Pets, is it some kind of nurturing instinct to save inanimate chod?

[Timewaster]

Staving off the inevitable hiab for as long and for as little as possible.

[uk_senator]

I see myself as a shite whisperer.. A preserver of shite that few people want any more, & I like being the odd one out.

It is a constant headache, 90% of the time its a literal battle, but its worth it for that 10% of the time that you can drive it & reminisce. Or even just look at one & think "I saved that from being turned into a Kia 5 years ago, & its running as well as it ever did".

The older I get, the less time/room/money/health I have to do proper full blown resto`s, so I just do it a bit at a time, when I can & improve things as much as I can.

I`ve got 11 at the moment, plus 3 waiting for me to collect them, plus about 8 more I can get at any time within reason (typically I've got nowhere to put them, or most of the ones I`ve already got), so I`ve really not learned the lesson, & I probably never will, which is why I stay single!

I need to win the lottery & buy a multi-storey.

[Sloth in a bowl]

 

 

That's a bit of a ramble, but in short - what is Autoshite? It's just, well, Autoshite, a car-centric way of life that makes its followers happy but others might not understand.

 

That is as good a summing up of Autoshite as I will likely ever see.

[sierraman]

This thread ought to be ‘You know when your Autoshite when...’

 

For me you know your shite when you have exhausts welded up.

[Faker]

The majority of my autoshite collection is far from being shit or shite. Couple of what i would describe as being minty classic rally cars, a couple of older moderns, some minty classic motorbikes, then a couple of junkers just for knocking about... like felicity the felicia. Served me very well over the last 18 months! Bought for £190, two tyres and a full exhaust in that time. Exhaust cost £44... Full system posted to my door in norn iron.... from Poland!!!!

 

What is autoshite for me?

 

Like minded car enthusiasts blogging and blabbing about our cars. Good and bad. Fancy and crappy.

[John F]

sierraman, on 28 Nov 2017 - 7:34 PM, said:

This thread ought to be ‘You know when your Autoshite when...’

 

For me you know your shite when you have exhausts welded up.

 

Ahhh, I can't resist it... it's the perfect opportunity. Soz mate, but...

 

"Grammar - the difference between knowing your shite and knowing you're shite"

 

[mat_the_cat]

Not sure if will. People said to me in about 2000 ish forget running a Mondeo on a shoestring what with its fuel injection and £600 clutch changes.

 

I think you're right - current technology may well seem incredibly simple in 15 years time. I remember people saying the same about these new-fangled automatic chokes!

[clayts450]

You may laugh but when I viewed the Streetshite I had to check myself from saying 'where's the choke'. As for ABS, PAS, aircon, 5 gears and electric windows it was like the fucking Jetsons to me....

[Captain Furious]

For me it’s mostly about having the chance to own some of the cars I either couldn’t afford to buy, couldn’t afford to insure or just missed out on owning back when they were current. Meeting hero’s that should really be left un-met and the inevitable disappointment that goes with that territory, but occasionally a bit of fun along the way.

 

There aren’t many advantages to getting older, but cheap insurance is one of them, especially classic policies which make it possible to have 2 or 3 cars on the road fairly cheaply. I’d change much more often but I hate selling them. Or, more accurately, I hate dealing with buyers.

[sheffcortinacentre]

I'm starting to realize why I've been pissed of with my fleet (nothing's been getting done past maintenance for about 5 years) & it's what's being said here.

 

I hate bodywork can do it ok but not mint/invisible repair & cant/won't pay what it would cost to achieve as im afraid to use them due to the cost of further scratch /chip repair.

 

But I've allways enjoyed the welding,mechanical,modding side & the driving.

This came apparent to me last week while transplanting a non ford turbo engine/box into a fiesta (sorry can't elaborate on pain of death by owner) far as I know this combination has never been done before has required no body mods & will be a great sleeper.

It was the most fun I'd had in ages.

 

But I digress, I've realised that I've been side tracked by worrying about that my cars won't look mint at shows/meets etc & that people will be gossiping snipping about them.

 

So I need to get back to getting them safe & enjoyable & driveing the arse of them like I used to & bollocks to wether the archescare a bit ripley or the paint is a bit orangepeely.

[Shep Shepherd]

I'd say what I do with my old cars is rolling preservation, especially in the case of The Volvo

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

Not sure if will. People said to me in about 2000 ish forget running a Mondeo on a shoestring what with its £600 clutch changes.

 

 

That's why they've all gone.  Not just that but they vanished quickly as well.

[MorrisItalSLX]

In my eyes, we are here to love the otherwise unloved of the motoring world.

[MikeR]

I have shown my son how to run a car on a budget ........

[Captain Furious]

I'm not sure why people seem to fear 'moderns' because, if anything, the complexity has made it far easier to fix them.  Sure, when the technology was first released and the diagnostic kit cost thousands of pounds they were quite daunting, now its a free download off the internet and a few quid for a lead.

 

Diagnosed an alarm fault on the Mk4 Mondeo the other night, been going off randomly, "Alarm Service Required" message on the dash, plugged in the laptop - BCM Module - Interior motion sensor fault.  Ordered a new* one off ebay and problem (hopefully) solved.  Could have been weeks of trial and error tracking it down without the electronic overlords.

 

When you see just how much info is monitored by the various modules, its really quite impressive.  I think when the current generation of cars are available for shite money it will be a Golden age of motoring.

[sierraman]

That's why they've all gone. Not just that but they vanished quickly as well.

Probably also because the Mk2 went out of production 17 years ago...

[Magnificent Rustbucket]

Festering rear arches on mine, but four matching Goodyears that were new last year. Couldn't give a shit about cosmetic rust now - I used to get so annoyed by it as well.

 

To me concours is a form of mental illness. Something really not right about it. A car is your servant.

 

I'd still like a nice newish daily and if the prices of damaged repairable ever come down from the current insane level I might have a go at one.

 

 

There is a world of difference in time, effort, money and detail between a beautifully shiny car with an excellent body, paint, mechanicals and interior and a full Concours car though.

 

I know you don't, but quite a lot of people use the term Concours quite loosely. Especially "virtually Concours" - which it almost never is. The time and effort needed to take an excellent car to Concours is probably equal to that of taking an average car to excellent condition. I agree with you though, genuine Concours seems to me to be a disproportionate effort for the gain. I like to see the results, though I would/could never do it myself.

[Magnificent Rustbucket]

I see myself as a shite whisperer.. A preserver of shite that few people want any more, & I like being the odd one out.

 

It is a constant headache, 90% of the time its a literal battle, but its worth it for that 10% of the time that you can drive it & reminisce. Or even just look at one & think "I saved that from being turned into a Kia 5 years ago, & its running as well as it ever did".

 

The older I get, the less time/room/money/health I have to do proper full blown resto`s, so I just do it a bit at a time, when I can & improve things as much as I can.

 

I`ve got 11 at the moment, plus 3 waiting for me to collect them, plus about 8 more I can get at any time within reason (typically I've got nowhere to put them, or most of the ones I`ve already got), so I`ve really not learned the lesson, & I probably never will, which is why I stay single!

 

I need to win the lottery & buy a multi-storey.

 

 

Do you still have an XJ40?

[danthecapriman]

Probably also because the Mk2 went out of production 17 years ago...

That and the fact the banger boys are chomping through them at quite a rate! The mk1 and 2 Mondy are going exactly the same way as the Cortina before it. Give it a few years for numbers to thin out even more and they'll start really getting noticed.

I notice them now when I see one as you rarely see them day to day now, mk1's especially. Now's the time to buy and get them stored away safe.

I'd love a mk1 myself, ideally with the blue interior!

 

 

 

 

The concourse things not for me either. Seems sad...

I'm shooting high with my Capri but it's not going to be concourse. It'll be a cold day in hell before you catch me parking it on a big mirror in some field. I like sound solid cars and I like pretty shiny ones but I'm not into concourse.

[Captain Furious]

I like a car to be in good condition, but when they're too good it becomes stressful to own.  My Mk2 Granada is just the right condition for me, from a distance it looks great and anyone seeing it for the first time would think (and often comments) "wow that's a really nice example"   But I know that under close scrutiny its far from perfect, the paint job isn't great if you catch it in the right light and there are odd dings and imperfections there already, so i'm never arsed about leaving it in car parks or getting stone-chips or scratches on it.

 

Plus I don't have to be all two-bucket wrongun about cleaning it.

[sierraman]

I’ve got one. Lovely car, prices are in their arse though, I gave £350 on it, there’s another locally for £400 for an ST24 with full test on it.

 

There used to be a bloke up my street, always polishing the car, every weekend was at it. Closer inspection showed a big fuck off rusty patch on sill and the cheapest shittest tyres. Shiny but a bag of shit underneath.

[danthecapriman]

Is it ok for me to admit that I like the US Contour version too...

 

 

My old boss used to have a dark blue L reg diesel saloon Mondy. He had it years and beat the living shit out of it but it always kept going and going, the mileage on it was insane too. Good cars.

[sierraman]

Saw a Mk2 Diesel other day looked really tidy. Fortunately the wife dissuaded me from asking the owner about it.