Roffle Range Rover Roffel - It's All Over Now! Caution: Victim established!

[anonymous user]

Oh bugger, I take it from that small scratch that someone, somewhere is missing the greater part of their granite boundary wall

[barefoot]

Gaffer tape FTW?

[3VOM]

Write off!

[hairnet]

is that why theres a sinkhole in royton

[robinmasters]

Some arsehole clipped the wing mirror.

 

They confused yours with the one pictured earlier in the thread:

 

 

 

 

With a step to your left and a flick to the right you catch that mirror way out west

[EssDeeWon]

Age related mark, innit.

[Junkman]

Oh bugger, I take it from that small scratch that someone, somewhere is missing the greater part of their granite boundary wall

 

Au contraire.

This is the result of an impact at less than 0.0001 OMHMPH.

Those bumbers are made from bloody chinaware!

[Guest Hooli]

Perfect excuse for massive metal winch bumpers

[Junkman]

Yeah, needs MOAR diamond plate. I'm such a closet OLLI...

[Jim Bell]

These machines are built to take abuse.

 

Last great can built in Brittain.

[Captain Furious]

13, 35 and 48 please

[Junkman]

These machines are built to take abuse.

 

Last great can built in Brittain.

 

Oh yeah?

The head of a bloody cyclist would be able to withstand more abuse than the bumper of this last great can built in Britten.

[Jim Bell]

Thats the joke.

[Junkman]

I know.

I'll swap it for something foreign and solid in Spring.

[eddyramrod]

Or a 75....

[vulgalour]

That's what he just said, Eddy.

[Junkman]

Nah. Not one of those Laura Ashley sofas on wheels, please.

[Ghosty]

We have Laura Ashley sofas. 

Not really as comfy as a 75.

[DeeJay]

Junkman has fell for a modern vehicle with fuel injection and leather seats.

He'll be driving a 3 year old X5 on finance by next Christmas.

 

No need to guess 

[billyboy406v6]

Mercedes are rather fine motor cars you know !

[Junkman]

Nah, I'd have noticed that.

[Junkman]

Following the Granadaland Greenhouse Gassers' impeccable performance to properly disable the Junkmanish P6

and the 405 puking its bettermary today, subject Range Rover is currently the only motive device available to the Junkman Clan.

 

It has hitherto provided sterling service, much in contrast to the prevalent doom gloom pub gossip, as expected.

Also, fuel consumption is far from the commonly circulated single digit figures, in fact, it is a whopping 15.9 OMGMPG overall,

despite an average speed of a dismal 29 OMGMPH over the entire distance I drove it so far.

I may be repeating myself, but it's the latter figure that clearly proves how woeful the infrastructure in this country really is and

that the 'speed kills' horseshit is mere propaganda to justify the desire of one Englishman endorsing the licence of another

Englishman for fuck all reason whatsoever except to make his life miserable.

[Six-cylinder]

Following the Granadaland Greenhouse Gassers' impeccable performance to properly disable the Junkmanish P6

and the 405 puking its bettermary today, subject Range Rover is currently the only motive device available to the Junkman Clan.

 

If you want to drive your Range Rover, just drive drive it, you don't have to break your other cars to justify it!

[Junkman]

I broke only one car and that I didn't on my own.

The other car decided to not require my assistance to break.

[Junkman]

Would anyone here be interested in my Rangey?

 

£1,800 for the right shiter.

There's nothing wrong with that bloody car.

 

No?

 

Thought so.

[Skizzer]

I might well have bitten on that but I've gone and got an Alfa now

 

(Don't ask me to explain why they are close substitutes in my head, that's just how my head is.)

[Junkman]

That 2000 Berlina by any chance?

[AMC Rebel]

Ha ha! Two weeks after I buy er....a Range Rover.  Buses, etc. 

[chaseracer]

Would anyone here be interested in my Rangey?

 

£1,800 for the right shiter.

There's nothing wrong with that bloody car.

 

No?

 

Thought so.

First year's accounts back for signature.  Company in profit AND a tax rebate due.  This cannot end well, shitewise... 

Shit.

[Dave_Q]

For any prospective purchasers, I can confirm that this vehicle is nicer inside than my actual house.

 

It's a bit like what I imagine a high-class opium den might have been like. 

 

It's also better on fuel than my house - I suspect it would take more than a gallon to move my house 15.9 miles.