Car features you don't like

[New POD]

Just now, AnnoyingPentium said:

That poor wee Astra.

It was the 3rd mk3 Astra I wrote off in 9 years. 

[grogee]

1 minute ago, New POD said:

Yes.  The airbag is the reason I walked away with only a small burn (From the airbag) from a self inflicted crash into a lamp post. 

Good one. All Voxalls etc. How fast were you going? Looks pretty bent

[New POD]

35 mph. Cut the corner driving into the services at the A50 A38 Toyota junction. Turned out there was a central reservation and the lamp post was in the middle of it, and not on the side of the road. In my defence.....6:35 am after driving for 1.5 hours and it was just going light and I was looking into the rising Sun... 

In the lamp posts defence I was driving too fast on an unfamiliar road. 

[PhilA]

Of the two vehicles I have here (both moderns) the Chrysler product outdoes the Nissan.

Q60. The heating controls are usefully on buttons down either side of the lower screen, but depending on the screen mode the result of pressing a button might appear on the bottom screen. It might appear on the top. Quite random. Also starts up on Menu each time, not where you left it (radio). Pushing CLIMATE duplicates all the buttons on the screen but adds STEERING HEATER which I'm assuming is for when the steering rack is cold.

Little BMW style dial does just the map. Switch changes the amount of schizophrenia the gearbox has at any one moment in time.

Lights are on the end of the indicator stalk (left side, twist. Has resulted in lights off on the dark when going to switch the wipers on), wipers on the right stalk. Auto wipers get a 2/10 (max speed for light drizzle, then switch off until screen is obscured by raindrops) but auto lights 8/10.

Dashboard illumination switch sets only the gauges. The top and bottom center screens are set individually in a sub-sub-sub-menu and range from slightly-too-bright all the way up to Picadilly Circus.

Ashtray is only available when in gear. In Park you cannot get your fingers around to get into it (used only for storing rattling coins and old sweet wrappers).

Ram. Heating controls down the side of the screen (which is bigger than my first TV set, wtf) and while the menu system is sane and well thought out, it still suffers from touchscreen trouble. ie driving along a road that's not smooth (every damn road in this country it seems) you have to hold your finger steady at arm's length and then prod the screen to activate the "button", which usually results in your arm being shaken and poking the wrong part of the screen. Being able to locate the switch by tactile feel, then apply a pressure to operate it is much nicer, however there are so many options the dash would end up looking like something Lancia designed in the 70's.

The 4 lovely clicky piano keys at the bottom disable safety features (front/rear sensors, tow/haul, traction control) and are seldom used. Those could have been on a menu.

Lights are in the American standard location on the dash first switch in (Pontiac is the same, 70 years older), indicators are on the left (and only) stalk, twist operates the wipers. One poke of the end button gives a single wipe, push and hold for screen wash. Auto wipers get a 9/10 rating. Auto high beam got 0/10 and was disabled ("I want my godforsaken bright lights on you piece of shit, stop thinking you know what the hell I want!" type moments led to that being disabled after nearly running into things on a dark and wet road).

Pulling the stalk flashes the headlights but only for the exact duration it's pulled for (previous ones would use the instruction to put the lights on for a half second then off, regardless of how short the operation of the stalk was. Horn too, which was annoying. You couldn't do the chattering cat style honk-hnn-hnn-hnn-hnn hoooonk to get someone's attention with added subtelty).

Gearshift dial. Well. Took a while to get used to. Still mostly annoying. Pushbutton would have been better. Regular shifter lever better still. Oh well.

 

All modernz are shit

[Noel Tidybeard]

10 hours ago, Barry Cade said:

Me.Right Traaaaaaaansit, ya bastard, tak me tae Tillicoutry.

Van.I'm sorry, I didn't understand that...

Us Scots all have a telephone voice.. now I need a Ford voice.. there is a whole new language I need to learn in my Focus' handbook.

Self driving cars are going to be fun..

 

 

 

grandad: the car is ignorring me!

me: what are you saying?

gd: "wireless on"

me: it doesn't know what a wireless is- ask for "radio on"

gd: "radio on"

car: "radio on"... and radio 2 starts playing merrily away!

🤣

true story! 😁

[Dyslexic Viking]

1 hour ago, grogee said:

Fortunately I've never experienced an airbag in action (although I've witnessed a few tests). Have any shiters felt the kiss of an airbag during a Traffic Incident?

I drove a Kangoo van into a Hiace van at 70 km/ h I do not remember much of the airbag but it was at least better than being run over by a Corsa when I got out of the Kangoo.

[Noel Tidybeard]

1 hour ago, AnnoyingPentium said:

Yes. Try being in a lower car when some twit in a new Rav4 has their high beam LEDs on.

this is where the "silly spoiler" on a spaceship comes into its own

[Asimo]

39 minutes ago, New POD said:

35 mph. Cut the corner driving into the services at the A50 A38 Toyota junction. Turned out there was a central reservation and the lamp post was in the middle of it, and not on the side of the road. In my defence.....6:35 am after driving for 1.5 hours and it was just going light and I was looking into the rising Sun... 

In the lamp posts defence I was driving too fast on an unfamiliar road. 

34 mph Astra into a post.

 

[garethj]

6 hours ago, Spurious said:

With all the crash resistance of a biscuit tin.

I love my old Audi.  I am aware, dispite it's protec-ten or whatever the crash system in it, it's not going to be half as safe a car as a modern thing with airbags, ebd, abs and superb brakes.

Working as a Paramedic has made me reconsider how cars respond to crashes.  Yes, a wagon will still squish you, can't escape physics.  But I've seen moderns roll off the A road and drivers walk away. Stuff that would have killed you 30 years ago has people walking away these days.

True, although I’d like to make 2 points.

First, if everyone who worried about crash worthiness took a few road safety courses, things would look very different.  Safety is important unless it means putting some effort in (general statement, not directed at you)

Second, in 20 years time we’ll look back on cars from 2022 as if it were like riding a motorbike with a lit stick of dynamite in the tank.  Yet we feel perfectly safe in modern cars.

[MrBiscuits]

Mr Toyota - why don't you use a nice round knob to recline the seat like everyone else? I don't want to pull a lever, push against the spring and rock back and forth like a loon to try and find the right angle.

While you're at it  can I have a turny knob to set the stereo volume instead of farting about with a touchscreen or pressing a button on the steering wheel 27 times...

[AnnoyingPentium]

7 minutes ago, MrBiscuits said:

Mr Toyota - why don't you use a nice round knob to recline the seat like everyone else? I don't want to pull a lever, push against the spring and rock back and forth like a loon to try and find the right angle.

Our Auris had this. As does my Mum's Duster. My Fabia has the knob (fnarr) but it's in that tiny gap between the pillar and the seat so my fat hands canny get using it without agonising pain. Lol.

[Quintus]

2 hours ago, SteersWithThrottle said:

Headlights on moderns that leave a fucking x-ray of your skull on your headlining as you pass them.

LEDs were bad enough but now they are using actual fucking lasers FFS. Since the main/dip is all computer controlled these days, WCPGW?

I find these really annoying. In at least 50% of cases they also make it difficult to see the indicators too.

 

[Missy Charm]

1 hour ago, MrBiscuits said:

Mr Toyota - why don't you use a nice round knob to recline the seat like everyone else? I don't want to pull a lever, push against the spring and rock back and forth like a loon to try and find the right angle.

While you're at it  can I have a turny knob to set the stereo volume instead of farting about with a touchscreen or pressing a button on the steering wheel 27 times...

The manual seats in BMWs are like that too, except worse because they also have side mounted levers to adjust the fore and aft position and, I think, angle of the seat squab.  

[SteersWithThrottle]

1 hour ago, Quintus said:

I find these really annoying. In at least 50% of cases they also make it difficult to see the indicators too.

 

Indeed, or even the corners of the car it's attached to. I fail to understand how safety can be improved by blinding drivers in oncoming traffic.

[PhilA]

7 minutes ago, SteersWithThrottle said:

Indeed, or even the corners of the car it's attached to. I fail to understand how safety can be improved by blinding drivers in oncoming traffic.

Ah, they overcame that on the daily.

They fitted the landing lights from Heathrow to the front of the car.

They make overhead gantry signs flash orange on the interstate at night. You can see the amount of lens flare they make above, and that's (dreary raining) daylight.

 

Phil

[garethj]

11 minutes ago, PhilA said:

Ah, they overcame that on the daily.

They fitted the landing lights from Heathrow to the front of the car.

They make overhead gantry signs flash orange on the interstate at night. You can see the amount of lens flare they make above, and that's (dreary raining) daylight.

 

Phil

Definitely fixed the problem of “sorry mate, I didn’t see you” and turned it into “sorry mate, I couldn’t see anything”

Personally I’d much prefer to see vulnerable road users like pedestrians rather than being dazzled by the ones who are already well protected in a steel cage.  

[Rustybullethole]

Electric windows. 
I very rarely have drivers window closed. I like it a particular level of overt and the next second the weather, speed wind direction (from outside or in) may change and the overtness needs attention. This is easy in my transit with its winder. In her car it’s up down fuckaround arghhhh.

Warning beepers. Don’t get me started..

[PhilA]

44 minutes ago, garethj said:

Definitely fixed the problem of “sorry mate, I didn’t see you” and turned it into “sorry mate, I couldn’t see anything”

Personally I’d much prefer to see vulnerable road users like pedestrians rather than being dazzled by the ones who are already well protected in a steel cage.  

Yeah. The lights self-level and have the typical modern black/white cutoff to the vertical. Driving along they're acceptable, only modestly bright points of light. Crest a hill and you need sunglasses.

I find the lights on the Pontiac perfectly acceptable for everyday driving- all 35 Watts of them. Not sure why vehicle lighting turned into a race to the brightest.

Super bright headlights are just as terrible as old Fed-spec ones on wet asphalt, just less light gets bounced up forwards towards oncoming traffic with the less intense ones.

[Metal Guru]

6 hours ago, grogee said:

+1. We all moan about airbag lights and nannying seat belt reminders but EuroNCAP (for it is mostly them) have made motoring a lot safer than it was. 

We all think we'll never need them but it only takes a lorry next to you to have a puncture on the motorway and suddenly you're the business end of a pile up. 

Fortunately I've never experienced an airbag in action (although I've witnessed a few tests). Have any shiters felt the kiss of an airbag during a Traffic Incident?

The scariest think with air bags is the burning smell. My first thought was the car is on fire.

[Barry Cade]

13 minutes ago, Metal Guru said:

The scariest think with air bags is the burning smell. My first thought was the car is on fire.

I got a Fiat Brava airbag in the face after I was t boned by a Fiesta.. my glasses got blasted away somewhere, after putting a gash across my nose..

Getting out of a crumpled Fiat, ears ringing, blood all down my face,  not being able to get a breath and blurred vision gave me an idea what it was like to be in Vietnam in 1968.. 

Stumbling around on a busy roundabout , not being able to see what had just happened was just plain scary.  

Thing was I was hit from the side- wing/A pillar. No side airbags.. I still get neck problems today . Nobody will ever know if the airbag lessened or worsened that. All I do know is I never want to be in that position again!

[fraser.innes.3]

We've got those Alexa things in the house for playing music...
Me: Alexa, play Something Good by Utah Saints
Alexa: I couldn't find anything good by utah saints, here is some other music.
Me: Och Alexa, hawd yer wheesht.
Alexa: switches off
Me: fine then.
Now that's enough O/T lol.

I had to change the stupid bint's name. My son is called Alex, and every time I said his name she would start asking questions.
I renamed he "bitch" after my wife left. You get a certain satisfaction saying - Bitch play........

Sent from my JNY-LX1 using Tapatalk

[AnnoyingPentium]

2 minutes ago, fraser.innes.3 said:

I had to change the stupid bint's name. My son is called Alex, and every time I said his name she would start asking questions.
I renamed he "bitch" after my wife left. You get a certain satisfaction saying - Bitch play........

Sent from my JNY-LX1 using Tapatalk
 

I want to know how you do this!

[fraser.innes.3]

I want to know how you do this!

https://www.wikihow.com/Change-Alexa%27s-Name#:~:text=How%20Do%20I%20Change%20the%20name%20of%20Alexa,select%20a%20word.%207%20Tap%20Save.%20See%20More.

Looks like they've stopped you being able to use any word now


Sent from my JNY-LX1 using Tapatalk

[Jerzy Woking]

My 4 year old bottom of the range Doblo has rotary controls for the heating, and two buttons for aircon and recirc.

The radio has knobs for tuning and volume and largish preset buttons, and no steering wheel buttons. 

Rear windows only open a couple of inches by flicking a catch. Not even keep fit winders.

Normal handbrake lever and cable, but has a hill start function built in, which works well.

The thing that bugs me beyond the pale is that the "lights on" switch is on the wiper and high beam stalk. The number of times I've pulled the stalk back from high beam to find I have switched the lights off, is innumerable.

But for a "modern" it is remarkably simple and well laid out.

[AnnoyingPentium]

1 hour ago, fraser.innes.3 said:

https://www.wikihow.com/Change-Alexa%27s-Name#:~:text=How%20Do%20I%20Change%20the%20name%20of%20Alexa,select%20a%20word.%207%20Tap%20Save.%20See%20More.

Looks like they've stopped you being able to use any word now


Sent from my JNY-LX1 using Tapatalk

 

Fuck. Okay. I wanted to change them all to Bob before my Mum comes home from her work.

[crad]

the wierd lever instead of a wheel in the clio to adjust my seat is not that annoying since i'm the only one who drives it. the ashtray that keeps closing itself on the other hand when i just want to put me fag out...

[Timewaster]

23 hours ago, Timewaster said:

We almost had a standard in the 90s when manufacturers used the 3 rotary switches system. 

Peugeot, Citroen, Vauxhall, Ford plus several others. 

Fallen by the wayside now though. 

My mitsubishi has proper buttons with a digital display. 

When you alter the controls, the digital display is replicated on the main screen. 

Except the layout is not the bloody same. The screen demist symbol is in a totally different place.  

Annoys the hell out of me.  The two displays are 3" apart. 

Here it is:

[ProgRocker]

On 01/02/2022 at 21:49, AnnoyingPentium said:

I don't like the placement of the electric window switches in my Granda's Dacia Sandero. They're below the heater controls (non auto as well) which I dislike compared to my Fabia which has them on the doors. I get it, it's cheaper, but it's bloody annoying.

The electric windows in MY 1999 SEAT Ibiza were in that location. It was the first car I owned with them (fronts only) . I quite liked having the window switches in that position but only because I'm left handed. 😁

In answer to the OP question, off the top of my head, I'll say the flat nondescript buttons on the dash for the heating & climate control on my 2003 Nissan Almera. Very distracting when driving when trying to work out if the right button is pressed. Perhaps not quite as bad a premium spec Alfa 164. 

[AnnoyingPentium]

8 minutes ago, ProgRocker said:

I'm left handed. 😁

Snap. Same here. I'm always a passenger in the Sandero so the window switches are a pain as a result. 😆

[SteersWithThrottle]

On 2/1/2022 at 10:30 PM, DSdriver said:

 

Electric seat warming that burns through the material and then set light to your trousers when you are travelling on a motorway.

 

This sounds very much like there is an hilarious* anecdote just waiting to be told...