The grumpy thread

[ashmicro]

Lighter fluid - 'they did it in withnail & I!' Verdict: never, ever, ever, ever drink lighter fluid. It's not fun, and it really does make you puke.

I've never tried lighter fluid but I drank petrol once by accident. That makes you puke too and the steady flow of fumes rising from my stomach was less than pleasant.

My mate drank a load of petrol when we were kids, and went apeshit, running round and round and round the garden. Eventually, he collapsed i a heap, not moving. I asked his big brother "Is he dead?". "Naah" says his big bro "He's just run out of petrol"

[Rusty Pelican]

Got a load of petrol in my ear once ( dont ask ) Cleared out the ear wax a treat , hearing has never been so good , wouldnt recommend it as a replacement for Otex though

[Minimad5]

haha !

I have to say, that story you just said Ash really made me PMSL !

[Lankytim]

Drugs, FWIW my opinion is they turn many people into mongs who can't function properly in society, e.g cant hold down a job for any amount of time. They can also be irritating bastards too.

 

Ive had a little weed in my time, not much- It just didnt agree with me. I was always of the opinion that it didnt do much harm and was just a bit of fun. Ive recently worked with heavy weed smokers and it just turns people into bleary eyed, monged out zombies. As has been said, moderation is the key I suppose.

 

I certainly won't touch it again after seeing the state of some users.

[dollywobbler]

Drugs, FWIW my opinion is they turn many people into mongs who can't function properly in society, e.g cant hold down a job for any amount of time. They can also be irritating bastards too.

Seen alcohol do exactly the same!

 

Barrett's write up is spot on really. A bad trip I had once is one of the worst experiences of my life and I was lucky to come out of it alive (spent a lot of time burning the back of my hand with cigarettes because the burning ashes were pretty and it felt peculiar). A good trip is absolutely superb - though being high on acid the night Diana died was VERY confusing! (one of our mates left the party early and we became convinced that it was because of him). I can't watch Wayne's World 2 anymore.

 

But I haven't touched drugs in about ten years. Do I miss it? Not very much actually. As long as you can say 'that was fun, now I'll get on with my life' I think you're ok. If you miss that step, you can be in trouble, just as if you find you need to drink ten pints before you can function.

[Mr H Sceptre]

 

But I haven't touched drugs in about ten years. Do I miss it? Not very much actually. As long as you can say 'that was fun, now I'll get on with my life' I think you're ok. If you miss that step, you can be in trouble, just as if you find you need to drink ten pints before you can function.

Spot on the DW. I'm a fairly liberal bloke & its all horses for courses, but I'm glad I can take or leave stuff - mainly leave at that. I think when you're younger you're more inclined to experiment as you don't have the stresses of everyday life, but as you get older everthing's just to much of a ball-ache.

 

Right, anyone for a lovely cup of tea?

[Guest]

Set of hippies!

[Mr H Sceptre]

My grump today is a continuation of a previous grump. I think I documented a few weks ago that I fell over quite forcebly whilst clearing a garden & landed on the base of my back/top of my arse. Well, this still hurts a bit, particularly after I've been in bed.

 

Added to that, I played cricket down the park on Saturday evening for a couple of hours, & as usual, was convinced I can bowl quite superb leg-breaks. My shoulder now aches quite badly.

 

Oh, & to compound that, I stubbed my barfooted toe against the hoover this morning.

 

So, with my various aches & pains, I now feel like I'm 60. I'm 38.

 

[warren t claim]

Some support for all you rehab heads out there.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4LnA-xCz5U8

 

 

And lets not forget this classic.....

 

[maxpower]

collect car after cambelt change and full service..... take old bint's cat to vets to be put to sleep (20yrs old).. had to park in main road outside vets. so leave hazards on as its parking for loading and unloading... deed with cat done.. jump in car and turn key... NOTHING surely battery cant have gone flat in 20mins?.. go to boot for jump leads... Grrrrrr they are in boot of other car!!!

call bro-in-law for jump start he comes 10mins later.. in a renault megane...feckin battery is under the drivers seat????

so he is parked sideways on the barking road in rush hour traffic because its only way to get leads to reach battery to battery... starts with 1st turn of the key... dunno if it was garage feck up.... cat cursing me... or just another shitty day to be chalked off as the norm

[Pete-M]

Is sayin' fuck all.

[warren t claim]

Is sayin' fuck all.

Go on, do tell!

[Pete-M]

Pervitin, a.k.a. Piko.

 

Pervitin Anadrex Methedrine Methylamphetamine Syndrox Desoxyn

 

I don't know anyone who's ever done this, but it's meant to be fuckin' immense.

 

Scarily enough, all the ingredients are available 'over the counter'.

 

It explains why a lot of Poles and Czechs never sleep.

 

Hitler used to inject it, regularly. Explains a lot.

[Mr H Sceptre]

Pervitin, a.k.a. Piko.

 

Pervitin Anadrex Methedrine Methylamphetamine Syndrox Desoxyn

 

I don't know anyone who's ever done this, but it's meant to be fuckin' immense.

 

Scarily enough, all the ingredients are available 'over the counter'.

 

It explains why a lot of Poles and Czechs never sleep.

 

Hitler used to inject it, regularly. Explains a lot.

Thats Crystal Meth, or hillbilly heroin (as its popular with American trailer park dwellers). Saw a Louis Theroux programme on it. Crazy shit. Makes your teeth fall out.

[Guest]

As mentioned by POG, long commutes. They do my head in.

 

Back in the old days when I was lucky enough to live and work in the same city, it was a round trip of just under 5 miles and took about 15 minutes each way. Since the office moved a few years back, it's about 25 miles a day and takes a touch under an hour (off-peak) - the majority of it on tedious 30mph town roads.

 

You can ease the sting of a dreary commute by going in a selection of mental cars (preferably with a good tape deck), altering your route to make it as interesting as possible, etc. But having to go on this ridiculous journey out every day can really drain you, I mainly dread going to work because of the ballache of being miles away from everything, rather than the tedium of what I actually do.

 

Before, I was doing pretty much the same tedious job, but only being down the road meant I thought nothing of it. Back then I was an ongoing temp and I wouldn't describe myself as an enthusiastic worker, but I just didn't feel like taking days off, I would take about 2-3 days leave a year tops. Sounds mental, but it just wasn't a big deal - I had my weekends, plus bank holidays, it was enough. I'd just collect up my annual leave entitlement and get a few weeks' pay out of nowhere around Christmas.

 

Nowadays my annual leave card is broken up into absolutely loads of individual days, most of which I can put down to just not being bothered enough to do a full week - I'm having Friday off, but I've not got loads on - I just can't be bothered going. There's slightly more pressure nowadays, but it's a pretty extreme difference to how I acted back when I was only down the road.

 

I'm sure a lot of people will have much longer commutes and will wonder what on earth I'm whinging about, to some people taking a couple of hours to work and a couple of hours back is the norm - I just don't see the point, that's all. I work in a city, there's jobs here, why should I have to go miles? There seems to be an expectation that everyone should have to go the distance for a job, but you've got to go there every day. Perhaps there should be some kind of incentive for employers to hire locals, then we wouldn't have as many people burning themselves out getting to/from their lousy job, passing hundreds of near-identical grief holes on the way.

 

Just a thought.

[RedSparrow]

Completely OT, but Hirst, how/where did you get that little picture of the Mazda that is in your signature?

[Guest]

I drew it on a computer.

[STUNO]

This is Jeremy calling, I'm doing a new series and need some really wrecked bods for the show. googled shite and came up with this site where no-one is sane PLEASE CALL

[Rocket88]

[

Added to that, I played cricket down the park on Saturday evening for a couple of hours, & as usual, was convinced I can bowl quite superb leg-breaks. My shoulder now aches quite badly.

 

Glad to see someone else here who plays the noble game. Bowling leggies when your out of practice is never a good idea............

[dollywobbler]

I do 50 miles a day on my commute. It's all twisty back roads, quiet village stretches with one small section of motorway. It's great fun, especially as each of my cars excels at a different bit of it. Sorry Hirst.

 

But we moved because I was faced with 70 miles a day on totally tedious roads. I considered that a bit too far but it's frankly scary how far some folk in my office travel. We're based in Peterborough yet we've got people commuting from Oxfordshire, Coventry and even London!

[Mr H Sceptre]

Glad to see someone else here who plays the noble game. Bowling leggies when your out of practice is never a good idea............

Bloody thing is keeping me awake at night now!

[Station]

The theory that keeps being bandied around that ants can lift 50 times their own body weight. This is bollocks, and I have known this as a child. An ant carrying some twice it's weight is like it carrying a piece of leaf that wouldn't even register on a set of scales. Even ten times it's weight is a fraction of a gram.

Right, assuming that an ant was the same size as a human, I deduce, an average ant length is 3-4mm, and it's scale factor to a human being is roughly 1:500.

Ant body weight = 70kg x(1/500)^3

= 5.6x10^-4 g

Lifting capacity = 2.8x10^-2 g

 

Strength increases approximately with square of body length, so amount a human sized ant could lift is:

 

2.8x10^-2 g x 500^2 = 7.0 x 10^3g

 

= a human sized ant could only lift 7 kilograms.

 

Weak!

[Cavcraft]

Tell you why I don't like drugs and it's actually been near impossible to type this as it still hurts to think about it.

 

A close relation (in-law) was a pot head. Lived on a rough estate, probably easier to score drugs than get a newspaper. He used to laugh at the smackheads and take the piss out of him.

One day, for whatever reason, he was feeling really pissed off, listened to some complete bastard who spun him the old 'won't get hooked/doesn't cost much/ignore what people tell you' shit and he was given some smack for free. This (free drugs) continued until he was a) hooked and in their debt.

 

Goes without saying he was an idiot to have taken it but he didn't have much in life and was at a low ebb. Again not good enough reason and he should have known better.

 

Fast forward a few months and he meets a bird, also hooked on this shit. One thing leads to another and in between trouble with the law his girlfriend has a baby.

 

We then find out that off his face on that shit one night and faced with a baby that kept dropping it's dummy in it's sleep his girlfriends mother suddenly wonered why everything was quiet. She goes in the room to find out why and said baby has it's dummy bandaged into it's mouth so it can't fall out.

 

It sickened me to the core to think of this when I heard (and ever since) and although the child was fine it makes you wonder what these selfish cunts do in the comfort of their own house.

 

Fast forward another couple of years and the relative dies in tragic circumstances. Not as a result of an overdose but drugs related non-the-less.

 

Mother of child moves to another area with child, goes shopping with her one day then just left her in a shop (aged about 4), fucked off and never came back.

 

Police/social services get involved, child goes to another family member and thankfully is loved and looked after.

The the mother returns, fucks the poor child about and now, aged less than 16 the child is developing a habit of it's own and is going off the rails. Tried to help, almost impossible and this lovely, sweet innocent child is now another fucked up mess wandering round with it's life ruined at a tender age.

 

Say what you like about drugs but the selfish, horrible fucking wankers who sell 'soft' drugs are quite likely to be the same cunts who peddle their stronger poison to kids knowing they'll get hooked and knowing they have them just where they want them.

 

I'm against the death penalty but I sometimes think the absolute scum of the earth who deal this shit should be strung up by the bollocks/tits and left to rot. If there really is any sort of karma in life I hope these selfish fucking bastards die the slowest, longest and most horrible death possible.

 

I will add that anyone who does dabble in this shit must be fucking crazy and are equally to blame but if their was no dealers and no drugs we wouldn't have this problem.

[Station]

I don't see anyone who wouldn't agree on drug dealers! Especially the ones who drive around in Range Rovers with a fairly big house in Cheshire free in the knowledge they'll never get caught. Qunts.

[Lankytim]

Amen to that Billy.

 

The thing is, the problem of drug dealers is easily solved- 15 years in prison minimum for dealing. Dont like it? Dont deal.

 

There is no place in this world for dealers. If our daughter ended was one day approached by a dealer id happily kick them to death. (the dealer)

[Mr_Bo11ox]

^^^ big punishments for drug dealers wont make the slightest difference!!! They could make it an instant death penalty - it doenst matter what the consequence is of being caught, to someone who is sufficiently confident that they wont get caught. This rule applies to most crimes in fact.

[Mr H Sceptre]

Fookin' hell Billy, thats heartbreaking.

 

Folk ought to just get into old cars rather than smack etc.

[Mr Lobster]

Unfortunately even very long sentences won't deter dealers as Bo11ox says. There is huge money for them to make and as often as not are very confident they won't get caught. The only way you would stop the dealers I suppose is remove their customers - the users.

[FredTransit]

Fookin' hell Billy, thats heartbreaking.

 

Folk ought to just get into old cars rather than smack etc.

Well that's what I did. in hindsight I think smack would have been cheaper.....

Seriously though I think the government are missing a trick. Make all drugs legal, and sell them through licensed chemists. Then they would be easy to get, not overpriced and the government would get the tax on them, to put into the national health, cos the junkies will need it. Mind you, if it's easier for them to get the drugs, they won't go nicking stuff and mugging to get it.....

Too sensible?

[Mr_Bo11ox]

DRUGS