The grumpy thread

[Milford Cubicle]

Thanks for all your money England, I'm going to use it to buy heroin, battered Mars bars and invest the rest in a factory producing shortbread biscuit boxes with a tartan edge framing a photo of a West Highland terrier.

[Cavcraft]

Thanks for all your money England, I'm going to use it to buy heroin, battered Mars bars and invest the rest in a factory producing shortbread biscuit boxes with a tartan edge framing a photo of a West Highland terrier.

[Mr Lobster]

I'd quite like to try a battered Mars bar actually.Anyway, grumpiness - this morning I went and dropped my van off for MOT. Rather than getting Mrs_L to pick me up I thought it'd be easier to stick my seldom used mountain bike in the back and ride the three miles back home along the canal.This was a mistake.Some 8 hours later my arse still hurts from the vicious battering it received from the seat. I have also realised that I really should try and improve my general level of fitness as I was utterly knackered when I got home.

[Pillock]

Here is a photo-montage illustrating my grump today:

 

 

 

 

[Father Ted]

Foreign motors dont get booked?

[Mr Lobster]

You were driving something on foreign plates, got pulled by an unmarked plod and given a fixed penalty for something?

[Cavcraft]

You parked your car up, a German chav blocked you in so you KIKD IZ ED IN. An ambulance turned up for him, you blocked the ambulance in and got an ASBO and an on the spot fine of thirty quid?

[Pillock]

Lobster wins the prize although extra points are being awarded for use of imagination :)Note I'm not flying off the handle about it, I'm just grumpy with myself for knowing I'd get pulled one day, yet never putting some proper plates on. The policemen were strict yet fair, life goes on.....

[Station]

England's World Cup efforts:"We should get the priviledge of hosting the World Cup as England is extremely passionate about football."That's a unique position as I can't think of any other country in the world that is passionate about football. Well done England!

[whitevanman]

Scotland wouldn't last 2 minutes without all the money England pours into it every year. You'd think they'd keep their mouths shut but they continue to bite the hand that feeds.

Not quite accurate, but I do feel the same way about it all

[Station]

Haven't paid any attention to the Scottish government thing, but I am getting the feeling they want to be a separate entity, yet still get all the funding from the rest of the kingdom. Is that how it is? Seems a li'l cheeky if so.

[Tayne]

.

[FredTransit]

Haven't paid any attention to the Scottish government thing, but I am getting the feeling they want to be a separate entity, yet still get all the funding from the rest of the kingdom. Is that how it is? Seems a li'l cheeky if so.

Also, how come they get to vote in our election, but want their own parliament?

[CortinaDave]

Hmm.. a lot of Scotland hating going on here at the mo.. we're not all bad you know! The labour/lib dem mob we had in Holyrood before were worse than useless, and for my money Eck and co have got rid of the bridge tolls, frozen the council tax and given us free prescriptions from next year.. so I'm happy enough!I cant be arsed with all the braveheart crap, but compared to dumb and dumber who were in before, its definitely suiting me better!

[whitevanman]

Haven't paid any attention to the Scottish government thing, but I am getting the feeling they want to be a separate entity, yet still get all the funding from the rest of the kingdom. Is that how it is? Seems a li'l cheeky if so.

Not far off what they are after.....the imbiciles

[whitevanman]

Haven't paid any attention to the Scottish government thing, but I am getting the feeling they want to be a separate entity, yet still get all the funding from the rest of the kingdom. Is that how it is? Seems a li'l cheeky if so.

Also, how come they get to vote in our election, but want their own parliament?

The same reason England votes on what Scotland does.....our "parliment" can only deal with divolved matters, the rest is still done by the UK goverment and we are as much a part of that as you guys are Personally I'd have either the one Parliment for all things, like it used to be OR 4 parliments that deal with each counties domestic issues and then get together on national issues....mind that will cost even more money than before or lets just have less of the idle fuckers in the first place

[Richard]

Hmm.. a lot of Scotland hating going on here at the mo.. we're not all bad you know! The labour/lib dem mob we had in Holyrood before were worse than useless, and for my money Eck and co have got rid of the bridge tolls, frozen the council tax and given us free prescriptions from next year.. so I'm happy enough!I cant be arsed with all the braveheart crap, but compared to dumb and dumber who were in before, its definitely suiting me better!

He's given us free eye tests and abolished parking charges at all but three hospitals too. I can't think of a single improvement Lib/Lab made to my life.

[Guest]

Cyclists! If you're on a 60mph single carriageway riding three abreast at about 10mph, don't act entirely surprised when I have to floor it close past you and cut in. And don't shake your fist at me in the rear view mirror, it only serves to highlight how much of a bell-end you are. It's not the Tour de France.

[retrogeezer]

From here:

 

http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/travelandtr ... /dg_069837

 

 

66

You should

 

•keep both hands on the handlebars except when signalling or changing gear

•keep both feet on the pedals

•never ride more than two abreast, and ride in single file on narrow or busy roads and when riding round bends

[M'coli]

Haven't paid any attention to the Scottish government thing, but I am getting the feeling they want to be a separate entity, yet still get all the funding from the rest of the kingdom.

The tax people in Scotland pay - income, vat, fuel duty i.e. every tax leveled by national government - goes to the chancellor of the exchequer's office, and then it's doled back out everywhere. That's why the First Minister has to ask for more money - it's not entirely impossible that all the money they're after is the money they paid into it in the first placed. Holyrood may have the power to tax the Scottish population at a higher rate than the rest of the UK (IIRC), but they can't lower it.

 

There are some decisions that the Scottish parliament has made that really are common sense (free hospital parking - can you imagine that working in England? I can't, it's bad enough parking in Harrogate's hospital as it is without non-sick people using it to park in when they're at work because it's free).

 

So I'd say stop bitching about Scotland, especially if you've not lived/worked there. If Scotland became independant, it would be a proud, skint, little nation, but it would be England that had the real headache, because it'll have nowhere to base its entire fleet of nuclear subs. They might get built in Barrow, but most of the coastline isn't suitable to berth such a fleet.

[Cavcraft]

Thanks to the fat bastard in the Picasso who tried to stop me filtering past slow traffic on my scooter this morning.Not my fault you were stuck in traffic is it, you fucking balloon?

[Father Ted]

Parking By Braille - NFTW

 

 

Paintwork isnt a problem - lamp though - totally fucked if I can get the bastard out. Must be a nut or something I cant see.

[Polystratus]

Parking By Braille - NFTW Paintwork isnt a problem - lamp though - totally fucked if I can get the bastard out. Must be a nut or something I cant see.

http://www.cavweb-forums.co.uk/showthre ... afira-B-07

[Claypole]

"hi mate just seen your ad on web.u do p/x with civic 53 plate 2door mot tax with service history, tint wind,alloy.look sport.many thanks," I'm ringing "We Buy any Car for fxxx all" tomorrow...

[Guest]

The silly mare in the private plated Civic who decided to pull out on me from a country road as I was coming out of the Wilmslow tunnels under MANC_AIRPORT at a fair rate of knots.She wasn't close enough to make me lock up (I was in the Amazon) but I had to cadence brake like hell. I could tell from the tailpipes that the car wasn't warm as she barely acknowledged the 45 year old Volvo with its headlights suddenly ablaze on full beam (my horn is shashed). Either she was babying the car along waiting for it to come up to operating temperature or she was pig ignorant. I'll plump for (b thanks.Here's a tip darling - when you join a main road from an adjoining lane, YOU HAVE TO SPEED UP TO MORE THAN 25 MPH. Had I been in the C4, I would have dropped to third and gone round her. Bear in mind my bloody heart nearly stopped when she appeared (I was thinking along the lines of 'There she is, right, she can't possibly want to pull out...........FUCK!') in my path, and I had to correct quite hard because the Amazon has a tendency to slew to the right because of an intermittantly sticky caliper, I was actually fairly pumped up at this point (adrenaline).We [finally] reach the traffic lights, and to my abject DESPAIR I see her trundling on to the J6 on ramp. The lights have changed......and she's still doing 25 mph. I have to drop into fucking SECOND to keep a safe distance from her boot. We approach the junction exit at the heady speed of 30 mph (combined), at which point I'm pretty incensed. Fortunately the traffic was light at this particular time (12.30 am). I decided to indicate my displeasure by pulling into the middle lane (quite easy given the speeds involved), making damn sure she knew I was level with her wheeled Alessi food blender, flicking on my interior light and flashing her the inverted victory salute.Childish I know, but how bloody slow must you have to be going to hold up someone in a 45 year old car with a dying engine?Lordy, these night shifts are making me twitchy.

[mnde]

^^You know, sometimes I really wish my car was installed with a big fuck off ship's horn blaring out highly illegal decibel-age that would scare the bejeezus out of people who pull out on me like this... (then dawdle on oblivious)

[Parky]

I have always wanted a device which can display messages like "OI M8 U DRVNG IZ SHT on a front or rear screen so you can air your displeasure at other road users. GR8 4 ROAD RAGE BASED ASSAULTSAnd Insomnia making me v.grumpy. 3 hours kip on average each night nowadays, really starting to wear me out!

[Negative Creep]

Had about 5 hours sleep on Friday night, then worked 13 hours. Got about 3 hours sleep last night due to a rave at the warehouse behind me and was up for work at 7. I still have 3 hours of work left.I'm really struggling to stay awake

[whitevanman]

People, mainly women and teenagers.............WHY, WHY, WHY must you always either walk like fuckin drunks or stop at the narrowest point in the Supermarket, going through any doorway etc, etc....fucking think will you oh and dont complain when I walk into you because you stopped suddenly....I am almost always gonna be larger and heavier than you

[pogweasel]

I have always wanted a device which can display messages like "OI M8 U DRVNG IZ SHT on a front or rear screen so you can air your displeasure at other road users. GR8 4 ROAD RAGE BASED ASSAULTS

I am sure that there was a vehicle in the US that hd this facility, it had one of those scrolling led type things like you see in dentists waiting rooms.I think it was called a Ford Aerostar AFX, I saw it in a copy of "Motor" circa 1987. I would have it permanantly set to OI YOU IN THE *insert vehicle name*, YOU BLOW GOATS.