The grumpy thread

[somewhatfoolish]

Useless or bent estate agents;

 

1. phone agent about property 1, arrange viewing, go to see it, be underwhelmed but still interested if the price is right, phone agent next day to explain this and that if there's a price reduction ~10% I'd be all over it like a cheap suit. No further contact and because I don't check asking prices on a daily basis I didn't notice the price drop; the fucking thing sold a month later for 20% less.

 

2. phone agent about gopping 'project' flat in sufficiently bad state it's not mortgageable, so straight away there's a limited pool of buyers and I make it clear I can buy without finance. They don't have any keys, which is odd as they've been advertising it for a month. I say I'll look round the outside in the mean time and can they tell me when they get keys in order to arrange a viewing. A week later it pops up on their website that it has sold.

[Alfamale]

We had that with our gaff. Mysteriously our offer at asking price wasn't passed to the seller but the one from the branch managers son £20k under was. Only found out as I went back round day after to agree a deal in person.

 

Agents refunded their fees after an almighty complaint and sellers gave us half of the saving. Everyone was happy in the end, until I found out the boiler was borked.

[Doctormop]

Dirk Diggler, on 03 Oct 2017 - 5:51 PM, said:

Pedant, sorry

No, seriously I'm glad you pointed it out, just about every Ford I've ever had used the 100k reset function but I was convinced that one read 217.000, Starting to wonder what else I've convinced myself of that can't be true, But that's a grump for another time

[castros_bro]

Useless or bent estate agents;

 

1. phone agent about property 1, arrange viewing, go to see it, be underwhelmed but still interested if the price is right, phone agent next day to explain this and that if there's a price reduction ~10% I'd be all over it like a cheap suit. No further contact and because I don't check asking prices on a daily basis I didn't notice the price drop; the fucking thing sold a month later for 20% less.

 

2. phone agent about gopping 'project' flat in sufficiently bad state it's not mortgageable, so straight away there's a limited pool of buyers and I make it clear I can buy without finance. They don't have any keys, which is odd as they've been advertising it for a month. I say I'll look round the outside in the mean time and can they tell me when they get keys in order to arrange a viewing. A week later it pops up on their website that it has sold.

 

If you have 10 minutes spare then flit over to their Farsebook page and using your real* name post the truth on public view without any identifying bits like house address.   We were dicked about by an estate agent and posted so on Farsebook to then discover others started posting about being dicked and their page turned into a winge from dissatisfied for everyone to see.

[Pillock]

The Ka that had the knackered tyres which was dumped outside my house has gone.

CCTV shows a mobile tyre fitter turned up and fitted two new front tyres - which I assume equalled the value of a 57 plate Ka on 130k with a rusty fuel filler.

[Cavcraft]

Have worked in the same department as some completely useless fat balloon of a bloke for about 11 years now. I still haven't figured out what the custard bollocked two bob knob weasel actually does, and I strongly suspect I never will.

[Cheggers]

"Custard bollocked two Bob knob weasel"

 

*nods appreciatively

 

Sent from my SM-A310F using Tapatalk

[richardmorris]

I took #1 son Matt Thestag out on the M4 - M25 and coached him all the way. Not in a backseat driving sort of way but more ..

 

"see that cnut in lane3? they are probably about to sweep across 3 lanes"

"that trucker with funny looking number plates that you are about to overtake? he is LHD and cannot see you"

 

etc etc

Yep- assume everyone else is a homicidal lunatic out to get you. Whenever I've gone out my mum always said "lookout for the idiots" - and she doesn't even drive.

[chaseracer]

Chase_Giffer gave similar advice to me: "Assume they're all out to get you, and you won't be far wrong!"

[Cheggers]

I got both my daughters to drive on the M4 on they days they passed their tests, both are now very comfortable at motorway speeds (and then some in the case of my younger one...)

 

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[Guest Hooli]

When I started my last job my new supervisor took me to the canteen to go through the induction process. A portly, ruddy-cheeked gentleman came in to use the vending machine. When he left again I asked the supervisor who he was.

 

"That's Jim, he's...er...he's...he has a position within the company."

 

I never did find out what his job was.

 

We have an office imbecile, who's only function appears to be to make the rest of the staff look good. He's also rather annoying, but that does mean I'll never have to work in the same office as him because I told the boss next time he annoyed me I'd just knock the cunt out.

[Guest Hooli]

I got both my daughters to drive on the M4 on they days they passed their tests, both are now very comfortable at motorway speeds (and then some in the case of my younger one...)

 

Sent from my SM-A310F using Tapatalk

 

I've never understood why people claim motorways are so different to normal roads. It's easier than a dual cabbageway due to no tractors/pushbikes etc

[MrDuke]

Yep- assume everyone else is a homicidal lunatic out to get you. Whenever I've gone out my mum always said "lookout for the idiots" - and she doesn't even drive.

 

She probably wasn't referring solely to driving - sounds like pretty good general life advice.

 

 

In other grumps, Ph****ucket ex-links. Moderately annoying when browsing through threads for amusement, seriously irritating when reading a specific thread which contains important pictorial information. Right-click to view the original image, and they politely demand that I turn off my adblocker. Looking at the icon, I see that the block counter is currently at 23. Er, yeah....

[Cheggers]

Yup, safest roads you'll ever drive on...nobody coming the other way (hopefully)

 

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[anonymous user]

When I started my last job my new supervisor took me to the canteen to go through the induction process. A portly, ruddy-cheeked gentleman came in to use the vending machine. When he left again I asked the supervisor who he was.

 

"That's Jim, he's...er...he's...he has a position within the company."

 

I never did find out what his job was.

In a former place of employment we had the corridor warrior, a chap who was always seen walking briskly whilst carrying a clipboard or piece of paper. Never actually saw him land anywhere.

[Guest Hooli]

In a former place of employment we had the corridor warrior, a chap who was always seen walking briskly whilst carrying a clipboard or piece of paper. Never actually saw him land anywhere.

 

Which reminds me of another idiot at work who is only ever missing from his desk & no-one knows where he goes. He's known as the littlest hobo & seems to dislike the theme being played when he does occasionally come back to his own office.

[richardmorris]

The first place I worked at in Llandudno there was a guy who bragged that he'd worked in every department - yes because he kept being pushed on to the next gullible manager once it was realised what he was like.

There's one in every big company- knows exactly how little to do, and what benefits and rights to claim.

[mercrocker]

In a former place of employment we had the corridor warrior, a chap who was always seen walking briskly whilst carrying a clipboard or piece of paper. Never actually saw him land anywhere.

 

At my last place that was known as "Frazer-ing" after a bloke who was past master at it.   He actually told me once that as long as you were carrying a document folder, clip-board or A4 notepad and looked like you were on a mission nobody would ever question it.    

 

He used to just fuck off for an afternoon - but when he did so he always made sure he bought a packet of biscuits which he would offer selected members of staff who could then be relied upon to say "Oh yeah, Frazer was definitely here today - he bought the biscuits...."    

 

Last heard of running a branch office in some African back-water if I recall....

[Guest Hooli]

There's one in every big company- knows exactly how little to do, and what benefits and rights to claim.

 

Always a union member too in my experience, it's the only way they keep their job.

[richardmorris]

She probably wasn't referring solely to driving - sounds like pretty good general life advice.

 

 

In other grumps, Ph****ucket ex-links. Moderately annoying when browsing through threads for amusement, seriously irritating when reading a specific thread which contains important pictorial information. Right-click to view the original image, and they politely demand that I turn off my adblocker. Looking at the icon, I see that the block counter is currently at 23. Er, yeah....

 

 

Probably- mostly came from being a radiographer in casualty- a particularly nasty biker crash had me promise to never ride a motorbike ( lorry jackknifed and the biker went under the middle and smashed the top of his helmet off- still alive on arrival though).

[beko1987]

Lots of the above describes me...

 

Luckily I do work though, as well as being the office clown/twat/longest member

[richardmorris]

Always a union member too in my experience, it's the only way they keep their job.

[MarvinsMom]

There's one in every big company- knows exactly how little to do, and what benefits and rights to claim.

good old Opie...

 

 

i aspire to be as good at my job as he is at his,,,,

[Cavcraft]

There's one in every big company- knows exactly how little to do, and what benefits and rights to claim.

 

Evening, boss.

[chaseracer]

Always a union member too in my experience, it's the only way they keep their job.

 

Your ignorance and prejudice is showing again...

[Guest Hooli]

Your ignorance and prejudice is showing again...

 

Nope, that's my experience.

 

Just because you don't want to hear it, doesn't mean that isn't what I've experienced.

[richardmorris]

Evening, boss.

 

It's why I work in a micro company. No where to hide!

The second place I worked, in Mostyn, didn't have many shirkers apart from, apparently, the woman I was covering for maternity leave. The labs were happier without her they said. The husband of one colleague there was restoring an escort Mexico I remember.

[richardmorris]

This one wasn't a union member, in fact he ended up buying half the company.

Not mutually exclusive.

 

Anyway, have you been watching the apprentice? The Marxist revolution can't come soon enough for these so called business people.

[Kiltox]

HSBC business banking - fuck sake. You have a fancy online application process which does all sorts of electronic verification of a company and its directors which is rather nice, no trips to a branch for me

 

WHY THE FUCK THEN did you need to ring me a week later to ask me most of the same questions again followed by another week and counting of NOTHING

 

I'm not asking for a £1m loan or anything, just a bank account. I don't believe for one minute a team of underwriters are checking my application in detail.

[rainagain]

There's a fantastic Japanese expression for these sorts of people: wet leaves

 

As in they lie around the place not doing anything and they're hard to remove