The grumpy thread

[chaseracer]

I'm bored.

 

I'm the chairman of the bored...

 

[dugong]

A year to the day since I binned the Midget and nearly broke my neck / lost my left eye.

Looking at my scars a bit closer today.

[garbaldy]

You binned a midget?

[dugong]

You binned a midget?

This time last year, yes.

 

It wasn't mine - twas for work.

Needed 35 stitches to put my face back together.

[garbaldy]

Lucky to be alive then since no five star crash rating.

[ruffgeezer]

Blimeh it's gone quickly that.

 

They did a good job nailing you back together! Are you properly recovered now?

[Tamworthbay]

Those little people can be seriously narly when peed off.

[MrDuke]

Lesson: if you're going to do something unpleasant to a dwarf [/unPC] at least make sure he doesn't have access to a long pole and a cheese-grater.

[Bobthebeard]

^^ Eh?

Lost me there Mr D.

[bub2006]

Van threw its tensioner pulley again. Bolt snapped this time. At least its managed nearly 2k since it last went. Need to remove the whole mounting plate. 1 bolt rounded off. I've run out of electricity,daylight and patience

[Inspector Morose]

What you need........oh, never mind.

[bub2006]

Eh??!!

[Bren]

Warrington.

 

Want to double your journey time?

 

Head through this arsehole of a place. Widnes, St. Helens etc all got link roads and bypasses.

 

Not Warrington - you have to go in the centre of it to get anywhere.

 

And the wanted city status - bastard joke.

[nacho man]

 

Vosa inspection bay today.

[Tamworthbay]

Vosa inspection bay today.

looks like handbrake turn heaven, go on, you know it makes sense. After all vosa inspectors are famed for their sense of humour.

[anonymous user]

^ Not sure whether VOSA commiserations are required; I see all the cones set up outside, did you have to do an auto-test and if so how was your handbrake turn?

 

Edited to add, Beaten by Tamworthbay, so it's not just me who saw the cones and thought that

Edited January 28, 2016 by anonymous user

[nacho man]

Handbrake doesn't work very well at all. Luckily they didn't test it. Suckerz.

[nacho man]

Was ok. Overweight towing a water jetting pump with a vw crafter. Just had to abandon it there in scotlandshire. The yard is in Derby.

[anonymous user]

I have a little story about where I used to work and them towing a trailer jetter with a van.

 

The jetting crew were out with the kit, but failed to get up a steep hill with the Sherpa/LDV van and came to a stop. It was a horrible road which they didn't fancy trying to back down, the more senior of the two decided it would be best to unhitch the jetter and roll it back down the hill using its brake and jockey wheel. Some of you may see a flaw in this plan already, suffice to say the handbrake, designed to slow it down going forwards, was no match for the jetter and its full load of water. The lads had to let it go, after being dragged down the hill on their knees, fortunately the bends in the road and someone's garden wall stopped it going to far. (OK it demolished the garden wall and wrecked the back of the jetter with the controls on)

They then rang the yard for a Land Rover to come out and tow the remains back, the chap who came out to pick it up did the obvious and drained the load of water, out immediately making it a lot lighter. The intention was to get it patched up and say nothing, it might have worked had a neighbour not noticed and reprted it to the police who turned up at the yard and gave the boss a bollicking.

[twosmoke300]

I also found out that trailer brakes don't work backwards !

[Inspector Morose]

Oh, ours do. So well in fact that on our gennys, the application of the handbrake at the slightest inclination of a runaway usually results in the wheels locking and throwing the poor sod at the jockey wheel end (usually muggins here) across the road.

[twosmoke300]

My wife's horse box ones didn't ( they worked well on the road ) and I assumed it was related to the auto reverse mech and floating shoes

[dave21478]

Auto reverse brakes should not lock in reverse if the damper is pushed in but if the handbrake is pulled they should definately lock up. You need to pull the handbrake all the way up as it has a spring energy store to keep pulling the cables beyond what they normally move to when braking and the wheels will do a quarter turn in reverse before they lock.

[MrDuke]

^^ Eh?

Lost me there Mr D.

 

Dugong binned a Midget and needed eleventyhundred stitches in his face. Beware dwarves with long-reach weaponry. Rubbish joke*, sorry.

[Louise2cv]

The phrase "terrible twos" lulls you into a false sense of security about all the other ages of your kids.

 

 

This is misleading and unfair.

[hairnet]

terrible till 21

 

so we keep saying to sister

 

niece and neph are 7 and 10

[Timewaster]

The phrase "terrible twos" lulls you into a false sense of security about all the other ages of your kids.

This is misleading and unfair.

No coincidence that Four and Five begin with F!

[chaseracer]

Dugong binned a Midget and needed eleventyhundred stitches in his face. Beware dwarves with long-reach weaponry. Rubbish joke*, sorry.

 

I laughed.  Nuff sed.

 

[chaseracer]

What you need........oh, never mind.

 

Eh??!!

 

A small cluette...

 

http://autoshite.com/topic/22464-bx-for-sale-offers/

 

 

[bub2006]

Don't tempt me. I'm trying to sell Picasso at the minute.