The grumpy thread

June 17, 2015

Grrrrrrr. Can't quite tell from that pic bit the wing has been properly dented by a tyre and something white, probably the white 64 plate Golf Bluestreamofshit that squeeeeezed in front of my car just before I went off to play sports.

No note of course, there's no way they wouldn't have known about it.

27,997 · June 17, 2015

got a letter from the dvla today - you are no longer the registered keeper of....etc - aye, thanks for letting me know but where's my Ã‚Â£68 direct debit that you took AFTER I sold the car ? gah !

Mine was a couple of days after I got the letter for the MGF, plopped back into my account.

130,534 · June 17, 2015

Chris Evans is going to be the new face of Top Gear.

Meh.

18,091 · June 17, 2015

Grrrrrrr. Can't quite tell from that pic bit the wing has been properly dented by a tyre and something white, probably the white 64 plate Golf Bluestreamofshit that squeeeeezed in front of my car just before I went off to play sports.

No note of course, there's no way they wouldn't have known about it.

what a cunt. what a shame about the damage to you car. it boils my piss when wankers do things like that.

6,584 · June 17, 2015

I was going to defend cats, then I remember owning cats and apart from occasional cuteness cats are utter, utter bastards.

Whilst I would never harm a cat, or anything else for that matter, am grumpy about the cats next door. Having made a huge effort to create a wildlife garden, watched robins and blackbirds bring up their young only to be killed (not eaten, just all killed) by the the two overfed cats that live next door is a grump. My lurcher is well fed also, but I bet the folks next door would be jolly cross if she attacked their cats in a similar way whilst they were in my garden. 'It's natural innit' only seems to work one way for cat owners.. I don't allow my lurcher to chase the cats by the way, but am sorely tempted at times. Ã°Å¸ËœÂ¡

18,091 · June 17, 2015

sadly that is just a cats way of having a bit of fun.

its something that domestication has not managed to breed out of them.

mine have always lived inside, so have not gone and eaten birdies and the like.

they have however hunted down and eaten house flies, moths and other unfortunate insects.

when the ginger cat was alive (she was put to sleep nearly 2 years ago) i caught her looking shifty. on closer inspection she had more whiskers than normal, she had hunted down and eaten a huge daddy long legs, and still had the legs sticking out of her mouth.

2,422 · June 17, 2015

A Halfords "We fit" operative informed me the other day that the Renault had "a crackin' leak, looks like it's from the radiator pal" (it's not).

I couldn't be arsed making conversion so I just said "Aye it's fucked" and got in my car.

3,600 · June 18, 2015

News agencies reporting people are in "critical condition"

A female cyclist just crashed and was described as being in "critical condition"

She tweeted. "nothing broken,just a bit sore" a short while after

13,577 · June 18, 2015

like statistics - 87.4% of the news is a load of made-up bollocks.

13,577 · June 18, 2015

Windows 8.

From what I can gather, most other complaints are along the lines of "but its got touch screen icons on a non touch-screen computer" and similar stuff......doesn't bother me. I just use its desktop and it seems fine.

What really twists my pisser is its updating.

Who decided to put the fucking computer in charge?

Remember XP? when you went to shut down in the evening it would be like "oh, hey man, I need to do these updates I quietly downloaded while you were looking at cat pictures, but its cool, man - you go on to bed and I will do this and then turn myself off." - how it should be.

Now? "ATTENTION, HUMAN - I will be updating in 15 minutes are there is FUCK ALL you can do to stop me. I don't care that you are halfway through an hour-long youtube video that you left buffering for ages so it would play smoothly, Im restarting anyway. Better make sure all your other shit is saved too."

Alternatively, when you switch it on its like "SURPRISE, MOTHERFUCKER, i`m gonna update. Oh, you just need to quickly print out some forms and get to town before everything closes for lunch? well TOUGH TITTY pathetic life form, you are going to have to wait. Installing update 1 of 19 .....1%.........2%.......3%......"

I wonder if this things machine intelligence realises how perilously close it is to getting flung out the window when it does this?

4,256 · June 18, 2015

The shit happens file

It looks like I may not have a BX any more, I'm pretty sure the insurance will scrap it now.
Low speed no injuries at all. Insurance claim is lodged so it's wait and see. I have an agreed value policy so will be paid out that with no excess as the other car came through a stop sign.
Glad I have not sold the Mazda now !

more 005.jpg

That should be enough to kill it

Yep I was right, BX is deemed not worth fixing by the insurance co. They will get back to me with the price they will sell it back to me at in a day or two. It may well live on.

It was insured at "agreed value" so I get that as a payout.

3,773 · June 18, 2015

News agencies reporting people are in "critical condition"

A female cyclist just crashed and was described as being in "critical condition"

She tweeted. "nothing broken,just a bit sore" a short while after

a new and already over used media favourite seems to be 'life changing injuries'.....

4,461 · June 18, 2015

This word 'Grexit' is really starting to annoy me. What was wrong with greek exit...

27,144 · June 18, 2015

This word 'Grexit' is really starting to annoy me. What was wrong with greek exit...

Too costly to type;)

Others include EUex (the existential crisis facing the EU)

5,965 · June 18, 2015

Windows 8.

From what I can gather, most other complaints are along the lines of "but its got touch screen icons on a non touch-screen computer" and similar stuff......doesn't bother me. I just use its desktop and it seems fine.

What really twists my pisser is its updating.
Who decided to put the fucking computer in charge?

Remember XP? when you went to shut down in the evening it would be like "oh, hey man, I need to do these updates I quietly downloaded while you were looking at cat pictures, but its cool, man - you go on to bed and I will do this and then turn myself off." - how it should be.

Now? "ATTENTION, HUMAN - I will be updating in 15 minutes are there is FUCK ALL you can do to stop me. I don't care that you are halfway through an hour-long youtube video that you left buffering for ages so it would play smoothly, Im restarting anyway. Better make sure all your other shit is saved too."

Alternatively, when you switch it on its like "SURPRISE, MOTHERFUCKER, i`m gonna update. Oh, you just need to quickly print out some forms and get to town before everything closes for lunch? well TOUGH TITTY pathetic life form, you are going to have to wait. Installing update 1 of 19 .....1%.........2%.......3%......"

I wonder if this things machine intelligence realises how perilously close it is to getting flung out the window when it does this?

The whole of windows 8 is a total twat! It's so different from before and unintuitive it's nearly unusable. Even when I use just the desktop and the fake start button I installed it decides to open stuff, like pictures, in some weird window/applet that you can't get out of other than to alt+F4

Getting windows 10 asap even if it's shit as anything has to be better

87,446 · June 18, 2015

I wonder if this things machine intelligence realises how perilously close it is to getting flung out the window when it does this?

That's why they called it windows as sooner or later it drives you to try to throw it out a window. You should try dealing with the server stuff!

13,577 · June 18, 2015

The while of windows 8 is a total twat! It's so different from before and unintuitive it's nearly unusable. Even when I use just the desktop and the fake start button I installed it decides to open stuff, like pictures, in some weird window/applet that you can't get out of other than to alt+F4

Getting windows 10 asap even if it's shit as anything has to be better

I dont get that because I spent an exceptionally long time setting it up telling it what programs to use for which file types so it goes fairly smoothly. Still get the odd curve-ball though with a rare file type that does nothing when I click it, so I click again and still no response so click again and finally it opens three times in some stupid app.

I dont have a smart telephone either so am a stranger to this whole "app" business. Generally, I leave them alone and they leave me alone and we get on fine like that.

The only exception being a calculator app I installed since apparently windows8 doesnt have one built in. For reasons unknown this bloody thing takes over a full minute to boot up or whatever it does when I click its tile, by which time I have lost patience and got my old Casio out of the the kitchen drawer. Thats "progress" for you, I suppose.

12,190 · June 18, 2015

I'm sure Windows 8 does have a calculator. It's well hidden of course, but it's in there somewhere.

5,968 · June 18, 2015

Windows 8 - fucking horrible. They got rid of the windows and replaced them with menu buttons. There was more interactivity with page your teletext. Rancid.

18,073 · June 18, 2015

I have no energy, my back and limbs hurt. Would anyone like to offer to paint the Toledo please. Form an orderly queue. Please, I beg of you.

Gimme the fucking painkillers!!!!!

5,965 · June 18, 2015

RSPCA advert on saying give us money and when you're dead we'll come and get you pets and "try to rehome them" you mean you might kill them too

In all my dealings with the RSPCA I've found them to be totally useless jobsworths that will only do stuff is a TV cameras there

20,127 · June 18, 2015

got a letter from the dvla today - you are no longer the registered keeper of....etc - aye, thanks for letting me know but where's my Ã‚Â£68 direct debit that you took AFTER I sold the car ? gah !

a cheque arrived from them today, the cheeky buggers have deducted payment for June when I sold the car on the 1st of the month

19,914 · June 18, 2015

Someone on here mentioned 9-5s like to bong.

Driving me mad... Every time you turn it on unless you have your seatbelt on. Arghhhh

18,091 · June 18, 2015

the last ford focus company car i had was like that.

bong- no seatbelt

ping- its cold out

twang-shut the fook up you piece of shit

it was i recall something like a 58 or 09 reg. facelitfed one.

it was crap, and the last of a run of 4 on the trot and easily the worse made and the cheapest feeling one of the lot.

i pranged it, and someone set it on fire, using real flames!

i wasn't sad about it. as i say, it was crap.

25,759 · June 18, 2015

Windows 8.

From what I can gather, most other complaints are along the lines of "but its got touch screen icons on a non touch-screen computer" and similar stuff......doesn't bother me. I just use its desktop and it seems fine.

What really twists my pisser is its updating.
Who decided to put the fucking computer in charge?

Remember XP? when you went to shut down in the evening it would be like "oh, hey man, I need to do these updates I quietly downloaded while you were looking at cat pictures, but its cool, man - you go on to bed and I will do this and then turn myself off." - how it should be.

Now? "ATTENTION, HUMAN - I will be updating in 15 minutes are there is FUCK ALL you can do to stop me. I don't care that you are halfway through an hour-long youtube video that you left buffering for ages so it would play smoothly, Im restarting anyway. Better make sure all your other shit is saved too."

Alternatively, when you switch it on its like "SURPRISE, MOTHERFUCKER, i`m gonna update. Oh, you just need to quickly print out some forms and get to town before everything closes for lunch? well TOUGH TITTY pathetic life form, you are going to have to wait. Installing update 1 of 19 .....1%.........2%.......3%......"

I wonder if this things machine intelligence realises how perilously close it is to getting flung out the window when it does this?

This ancient MacBook through which I communicate with you lot is reaching the end of its natural life. It has been dropped several times, is no longer square, and consequently the link between the input devices and the screen is getting flaky.

"Why not get a PC laptop?" says Domestic Management.

The answer is above...

27,997 · June 18, 2015

Tried to repair my 9-3 climate control unit.

Because I'm an impatient prick, I tried to do it with a massively underpowered soldering iron, and I've fucked it up. Solder everywhere, which because there's so much solder now won't melt with the weedy iron and when I tried, tracks started lifting. So that's Ã‚Â£20 on a new LCD up the spout and I've just had to buy a whole new unit for Ã‚Â£35 (which will probably have dead pixels too). Twatting twatsticks.

It's such a mess, I'm not even going to put pictures of it up. It's embarrassing. Ten years I repaired laptops and I can't even put a FPC socket on a board any more. Looks like I just poured molten lead on a 12" dildo and used it to beat a PCB to death.

2,551 · June 18, 2015

Summer has been cancelled up here in the Highlands...so hopefully all the Classic Car wankers who put us in the ditch with their Mad Single Track I Havent a Fucken Clue Look at my Asston Martin doing the Tonne Cunts..will all get wet with their sodding roofs down...

25,056 · June 18, 2015

Tried to repair my 9-3 climate control unit.
Because I'm an impatient prick, I tried to do it with a massively underpowered soldering iron, and I've fucked it up. Solder everywhere, which because there's so much solder now won't melt with the weedy iron and when I tried, tracks started lifting. So that's Ã‚Â£20 on a new LCD up the spout and I've just had to buy a whole new unit for Ã‚Â£35 (which will probably have dead pixels too). Twatting twatsticks.

It's such a mess, I'm not even going to put pictures of it up. It's embarrassing. Ten years I repaired laptops and I can't even put a FPC socket on a board any more. Looks like I just poured molten lead on a 12" dildo and used it to beat a PCB to death.

Don't beat yourself up mate, It's my job to solder stuff, I do it all day My soldering station cost multiple thousands of pounds. Tips for it are about Ã‚Â£12 a go and last me about a week, but sometimes I really just make a complete fuckup and have to resort to the Ã‚Â£30 150w weller with a 5 year old tip, loads of flux and some solder wick.

That said I find laptop boards worse than anything! we don't usually do owt like that but sometimes we do them as favours for big customers and changing the charging jack on them is a right nightmare, I've ended up just drilling the old ones out in the past.

27,997 · June 18, 2015

I can do DC ports with my eyes closed, one hand behind my back and my testicles trapped in a vice. It helps that they're only power+GND, and it's a doddle to run a bit of wire if the track has burned away - plus because it's handling 90W or something, it's normally nice chunky track. It's little tiny stuff that I used to be good at that I just can't do. My iron is only 18W, I was taught how to remove solder by flowing more on and then keeping it moving before mopping it up (or just removing a component with all the solder sloshing around, if the board isn't for reuse). So I tried that, but now I've got four kilos of solder on there my iron is just cooling off.

Ã‚Â£35 would have either bought me a 40W iron, or another climate control unit. The former idea doesn't solve the fact I've already started to muller the tracks.

If I was headed off to our repair place I'd just take the board along in my bag and borrow the kit, but I'm not near there for ages. We've got some nice hot air reflow stuff, with enough force that if you wang it all up to 11 every surface mount component on the board just wanders over to the far corner

I've calmed down a bit now, I'll keep the old ACC and once I pick up a cheap 35W+ iron and some reflow jelly, I'll have another bash and just repair the tracks with wires. It doesn't look to be a multilayer board so hopefully some little bits of wire to the right pads will sort it.

6,964 · June 18, 2015

Windows 8 - fucking horrible. They got rid of the windows and replaced them with menu buttons. There was more interactivity with page your teletext. Rancid.

I wish I'd filmed your encounter with Gran Turismo. I imagine your reaction to Windows 8 was similar.

In other news, Dropbox is mental. I decided to uninstall it after it decided to ignore huge swathes of photos I needed it to transfer. It could well be my new phone - my PC can't connect to it at all. When I tell people I have difficulty using Dropbox (because it behaves strangely on every piece of kit I try it with) they look at me with the sort of withering stare reserved for stupid dogs and small children.

Is it just me?

The grumpy thread

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