The grumpy thread

[Luxobarges_Are_Us]

sorry about that, cheggers. Even thinking about it makes one grumpy, let alone actually being there...

[trigger]

Sorry to hear that Cheggers , A auntie of mine died last week of Cancer leaving a 16 y/o daughter and 14 y/o son and my best mates ex girlfriend also died of Cancer last week, she was only in her mid 40's, they both had a child together who is only 6 who my mate now has full custody of which has been hard for him as he's single.

[Angrydicky]

Some little cnut climbed up on my Maestro last night and took a shit down the tailgate. Utter, utter wankers

[Lankytim]

SORRY

Unable to Use Service

 

Unfortunately, because of the tax class of the vehicle or recent changes to the vehicle record, you are currently unable to apply for a tax disc or declare SORN using this service.

 

You will need to apply for the tax disc or declare SORN at a licence-issuing Post Office® or DVLA Local Office (as applicable for the vehicle) using the reminder (Vehicle Licence Application/SORN Declaration) or the Registration Document/Certificate together with the Insurance Certificate or Cover Note, MOT Test Certificate/GVT Test Certificate (if applicable) and fee.

 

FUCK OFF DVLA!!!!!!!!!1111!!

[chaseracer]

^^Helluva aircleaner snorkel on that muther too!

Gets very dusty in Coventry, Norm...!

[Tayne]

Some little cnut climbed up on my Maestro last night and took a shit down the tailgate. Utter, utter wankers

 

Send a picture to Top Gear, Clarkson was moaning about a 1m shit on his RR a few weeks ago.

[chaseracer]

Some little cnut climbed up on my Maestro last night and took a shit down the tailgate. Utter, utter wankers

 

Send a picture to Top Gear, Clarkson was moaning about a 1m shit on his RR a few weeks ago.

Should've told Hammond to get off...

 

I am, you will be distressed to learn, here all week.

 

[barrett]

Some little cnut climbed up on my Maestro last night and took a shit down the tailgate. Utter, utter wankers

 

That's fuggin' grim Dicky. And these people are allowed to just walk around outside with no supervision.... makes you wonder eh?

[messerschmitt owner]

Look on the bright side. If your Aggro had been brown you might not have noticed for a while ...

[Rod/b]

Some little cnut climbed up on my Maestro last night and took a shit down the tailgate. Utter, utter wankers

 

What's the saying? Everybody's a critic.

[nigel bickle]

I got that too recently Lanky. Totally unable to SORN..Post office couldnt do it either- refused them.....

 

Being a suspicious bugger I immediatyely posted in -Recorded- a paper SORN. Heard nothing back yet.

[Mr_Bo11ox]

I too have got that on my Avenger, unable to SORN it, i've done nowt about it so far admittedly.

[messerschmitt owner]

I too have got that on my Avenger, unable to SORN it, i've done nowt about it so far admittedly.

I tried to Sorn my old Hiace one time and they went - doesn't exist, despite me sending them a copy of the logbook, a photo of the van and the chassis plate - it was on their system, but they were stupid/blind/Welsh!

 

Never ever did send another sorn notice for it.

[M'coli]

This, on the RAC's website:

Fuel optimiser

 

Another money-saving option is a fuel optimiser. These fit in to a car’s fuel line and generally need to be professionally fitted. However, according to fueloptimisersystems.com, they can reduce running costs by up to 27 per cent – depending on the size of your engine – and cost from £200 upwards.

I can't believe they're endorsing such things - I've had a read of the blurb about it on the website cited by the RAC, and it sounds like snakeoil to me - and they say that it works on petrol, diesel, biodiesel and LPG? I doubt it:

The Rod cores are specially designed to create turbulence in the fuel flow path, enriching the fuel and maximizing the take-up of trace metals. The fuel then passes through a sintered ceramic magnetic core which alters the free electron structure of the fuel, polarizing the fuel hydrocarbons prior to combustion.

Hydrocarbons have very little electric dipole moment so I fail to see how they will be polarised!

The two processes, chemical and ferro-magnetic, essentially alter the molecular structure of the fuel to encourage better bonding between fuel molecules and atmospheric oxygen promoting a more complete oxidation of the fuel and, hence, a more efficient combustion process.

The mind boggles!

Additionally, a metal alloy catalyst is deposited in molecular quantities in the combustion chambers, coating the vulnerable surfaces of the valves, valve seats and piston rings to prevent overheating, aid sealing and enhance engine lubrication.

If this thing worked it would poison the exhaust catalysts too...

The results of improved fuel combustion are a significant reduction in harmful exhaust emissions, a noticeable increase in engine power output, and a measurable improvement in fuel economy.

Yo, seriously?

[Cavcraft]

/\

 

Crock of crud as you rightly say. Quite a few haulage firms were taken in by this rubbish back in the day only to find it made no differnce at all.

[Mr_Bo11ox]

I'm amazed the RAC are promoting that shit!!! Maybe they've had their website hacked!

[Station]

Isn't it just a magnet, like those ones you get on TV power cables?

[mattblack]

Is it GR8 4 ARTHRITIC LABRADORS as well?

[M'coli]

I'm amazed the RAC are promoting that shit!!! Maybe they've had their website hacked!

It's in their members' August ezine thing, I was sent the email link to it, read the article about fuel saving and that, and couldn't believe this was mentioned.

Edit:

http://ezine.rac.co.uk/2011/august/arti ... vCB8cfPEDT

[CreepingJesus]

Tracking adjusted so that the steering wheel's off-centre, when the wheels are dead ahead. It may just be me, but it makes me irrationally angry. Moreso when there's controls on the steering wheel, and they're not quite where you expect them to be, anymore!

Oh, and the fuel economiser thing...what a load of utter pseudo-science bollocks. Sure, you get laminar flow and such in pipes, but the pressure the fuel's under, and all the twists and turns in the pipe run, makes a mockery of that idea. Glad I'm not an RAC member. I wonder if their patrols diagnose cars by reading the bumps on them?

[ashmicro]

Those things (or a version thereof) were doing the rounds about 20 years ago. Two green-plastic dipped semicircular things that you clipped together around the supply from the tank. A few of us got them for nothing to try them out (I never fitted mine). One of my mates had a Mini, and he was convinced that these things were amazing. I sort of believed him until I noticed that his was clamped around a brake pipe.

[ashmicro]

^^ What Norm said. Or, as was suggested to me many years ago "Crash it into a kerb mate"

[ashmicro]

I had to do the same on the Rover. SOP for removing airbags is to disconnect the car battery for a minimum for 1 hour before doing anything else. Car-dependent, there may be a thing behind the steering wheel called a "rotary coupler". I imagine you'll have one as you mentioned steering wheel controls. Some cars have them screwd on to the top of the column shoruds, other ones are just kind of samdwiched on by the steering wheel. The latter will require you to lob a bit of masking tape on it so it doesn't turn while you have the wheel off. (if they do move, things like the indicator self-canceller wil work in the wrong place)

[Albert Ross]

Norm.

 

yOu Is rong M8.

 

 

Moderns which have steering wheel controls running through the CIM are incredibly complex beasties, and the Airbag clockspring is also sitting inside there. Unfortunately the car will probably have an ESP and TC application running through the ABS (even though the car may not "have it fitted"..it will need the relative ECUs programming to identify the other ECUS in the system also using the same circuits) This means it wil have a steering angle sensor, so the column needs centralising in the rack, and the SAS will require calibration within 5 degrees of centre in order for all the safety systems to function together correctly. So just moving the steering wheel is a wank idea, and will also give uneven steering lock. So there.

[Amazo]

Look, it's an unmoderated forum full of adults (mostly). We rely on self restraint rather than a report post button and a banhammer. This thread is for grumps, yes, everyone needs to vent but you can still piss us all off by spamming it to death trying to argue with Norm.

 

as usual,and like other forums he is fucking it up.

 

Are these remarks aimed at me? Erm, in that case where am I spamming? And which other forums would these be? I've been here a month, started one decent thread (IMHO), contributed positively to others, and if you check 'other forums' (RR and Rods N' Sods) I've posted some quality stuff over the course of a year or so.

I came to this place to get away from bickering and pettiness and guess what, it's just as bad here. I've gotta say I'm very disappointed in some people's attitude on here to say the least, I expected better (well, not from Norm, but he is what he is). I was gonna post a lot more stuff from my blog but you know what? Forget it, if that's your attitude.

Oh, and I've probably had to consign one of my cars to the bin today, due to it being too costly to repair due to some twat rear-ending it. Thanks for cheering me up with your comments, guys, you're a real inspiration.

[Albert Ross]

Hell, I dunno. I wuz just sayin' like. Since about 1992/3 most cars have this kind of shit going off.... Just unseen by most drivers, as it normally goes wrong in the hands of the last owner, you know, the one who cares least. I wouldn't like to mess with my 5 year old Focus. It's supremely reliable, like ANY Ford, but still.

[trigger]

Oh dear Amazo, It looks like you've got the wrong end of the stick, I think you'll find FD's comments were aimed at norm...

[scaryoldcortina]

I was talking to you, Amazo. I apologise if you took my use of "spamming" as offence, I meant it to mean over posting and monopolizing one thread rather than including links to cheap viagra and p0rn. Sorry you had a bad day. This is the right thread to vent about it

[CIH]

Tracking adjusted so that the steering wheel's off-centre, when the wheels are dead ahead. It may just be me, but it makes me irrationally angry. Moreso when there's controls on the steering wheel, and they're not quite where you expect them to be, anymore!

Oh, and the fuel economiser thing...what a load of utter pseudo-science bollocks. Sure, you get laminar flow and such in pipes, but the pressure the fuel's under, and all the twists and turns in the pipe run, makes a mockery of that idea. Glad I'm not an RAC member. I wonder if their patrols diagnose cars by reading the bumps on them?

 

Or just take it back and have them tweak it. You know getting the wheel straight is much harder than you likely think. It's 100% subjctive and it's almost impossibile to realy know untill driving it on a flat road. Eitherway I doubt they checked to see if the rears where square.

TBH it's never bothered me. I drove a Berlingo van from Hemel Hempstead and didn't even notice until after ~1 hour of driving.

[Luxobarges_Are_Us]

Another thing that peeves me is “Serving Suggestionâ€Â. I have a salad cream bottle which has a photo of some salad cream on a tomato and some lettuce on the label. Why does it say “Serving Suggestionâ€Â? I know that’s not the only way you are allowed to use it and I know that the tomatoes and lettuce don’t come with it.

 

Or the Mr Kipling buns where one is cut in half on a plate. “Serving Suggestionâ€Â. F**k me – I know they’re all going to be intact in the pack. Are there people out there that need this kind of guidance??

 

You'd think food manufacturers and retailers would have some sense, but they don't. For example, Sainsbury's were selling some crumpets and they added to the packaging something like 'Delicious Strawberries', written in MASSIVE FONT, which turned out to have been a mere serving suggestion and nothing to do with the actual (plain savoury taste) item inside the packaging. The legislation got enacted to stop this sort of piss-taking.