Jump to content

eBay tat volume 3.


Recommended Posts

Posted

Bump on this

 

Anyone in Suffolk

Monseur dollywobbler could you advise re what to look at. A fellow shatter has offered their assistance to view but isn’t knowledgeable.

 

Maybe a list of what to check?

 

Dollywobbler to the shatphone

Posted

Oh bloody hell, I hope it makes more than that.  The auction is the day after pay day and if it stays around a grand I'm worried I might do something incredibly stupid.

That will be one hell of a money pit to restore. Finding parts for them is not easy especially getting hold of a dash top. The foam in them under the vinyl crumbles on the dash top and the rail under the dash. I have got a spare speedo though if needed

Posted

Hmm.  This might be a more sensible* purchase in that case.

 

img_3596.jpg

 

Because owning just one slightly broken 1960s moped just isn't enough.

Posted

Ipads on drainers
sink fuck all will fit in
Cheap Argos kettles but nothing to shit in
Brown paper packages tied up with string

knob wiped on nettles, it doesn't half sting
 

 

s-l1600.jpg

 

 

Black coloured ponies from eating Pot Noodle
cracks in the table, the whole fucking caboodle
'distressed' work tops, this sodding place mings

CBA taking plastic off floor coverings

 

s-l1600.jpg

 

my bird's in the back doing her lashes

whilst on my wheel trim her alsation slashes
some twat on a motorcross who's wheelie-ing

Not really actually my favourite thing

 

s-l1600.jpg

 

When the dog shites
When my bell end stings
When I'm feeling sad
I simply remember going camping
And then I feel more bad

s-l1600.jpg

 

 

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Ford-transit-mk3-county-camper-van/173748370696?hash=item287435bd08:g:1UwAAOSwxtVcQjMx

Posted

Hmm.  This might be a more sensible* purchase in that case.

 

img_3596.jpg

 

Because owning just one slightly broken 1960s moped just isn't enough.

 

The weird thing about these is that each and every one is different. Mine struggled to do 20 OMGMPH with tailwind and homesickness.

A friend of mine in Belgium also got one of them. Given enough run up, hers did 50 clicks just out of the box. Then she started a bit of porting and polishing (she knows her stuff), filled the exhaust with barbie ignition liquid and set it alight, so all the oily coal deposits burned away. The result of such doing is 60 clicks. I tried it once on the slight downward slope from Thimister-Clermont to Henri-Chapelle. I felt like Burt Munro. Some say that when I entered the pub I was shaky and mammered incoherently until adequate intoxication was achieved.

Posted

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Jaguar-XJR-super-charge/153340085983?hash=item23b3c806df:g:I0EAAOSwVXdcPQz0:rk:10:pf:0

 

....Rust free car as has been kept in storage....

 

.... Backlights need replacing as well as bumper, as it's damaged in storage fire, please note in pictures that the back of the car is not rusted it is due to slight* fire damage.

 

Yeah cool story bro.

 

 

i gotta spare pair of (navy blue) bumpers that would fit that......

Posted

 

You don't even get that shitty £99 cover plate AND it's got a steering wheel that needs immediate frisbee-ing into the sea.

Posted

Bump on this

Anyone in Suffolk

Im just up the road in Stowmarket if it's in Sudbury that's 20 mins away.

PM your phone number and requests.

I've had a few 2CV previously

Posted

s-l300.jpg

 

Offroad Crapman started out in life as an OLLI farmer

He was infamous for 15 minutes

and stick on body armour

then he somehow got himself onboard a Duke of Edinburgh car ditching scheme

With a Prince of Wales certificate

for a laughable valuation that must be a dream

 

s-l500.jpg

 

s-l500.jpg

 

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Landrover-Discovery-3-door-300TDi-Offroader/153339870554?_trksid=p2485497.m4902.l9144

 

 

Moving up on second base

With 20 tonnes of chequer plate

a 6 foot high gopping lump

the undisputed Stig of the dump

 

s-l1600.jpg

 

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/land-rover-90/254077859620?hash=item3b28387724:g:ND4AAOSw0vJcQJsS

 

 

the undisputed ringer of the slums
with more V5s than the DVLA
chassis' butchered by the day
just about to take the stage
the one and only blank the front page
 
 

s-l1600.jpg

 

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/V5-logbook-memorabilia-and-VIN-live-land-rover-jeep-1971/233091173364?hash=item3645510bf4:g:7DgAAOSwL-1cLkF7:rk:6:pf:0

 

Paddock's got something to sell,

to the country's off-roaders

An aluminium clad horror,

for the no fixed abodeless

where you can live in something vile

if you stay in the closet

if gash is your style

then leave a deposit

 

s-l500.jpg

 

There's nets in the belfry

the windows are jammed

the toilet don't exist

wipe your arse in the sand

a born again OLLI

here comes 

Offroad Crapman

 

s-l500.jpg

 

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/2005-05-Land-Rover-Defender-110-DORMOBILE-Camper-Td5/352478261731?hash=item52115771e3:g:vLoAAOSwnqpbuCns:rk:2:pf:1

 

 

 

with his snorkel, mud terrains

shit wipers and drain pipe roll bars

just when you thought it was safe to go back to the country
Rusty sheds and chavvy neds
make me throw up my breakfast

wake up with your bobbed beds 
Scrap this

s-l1600.jpg

 

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Rover-RANGE-ROVER-OFF-ROADER-V8-3-5/163385315717?hash=item260a861185:g:nBYAAOSwSidb8~cP:rk:32:pf:0

 

Moving up into second place,

behind Freeloader moon landing face,

at 60 miles 

and a good wind away

the undisputed capital of the slum

the lights of Rhyl shine on his bum

some poncey photographs away

from the nearest blue rinse place to stay

The one and only...Colwyn Bay 

 

s-l1600.jpg

 

 

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Land-Rover-Freelander-G4/283344776483?_trksid=p2485497.m4902.l9144

Posted

 

 

Didn't fancy the one-bucket-wrong'un XJS?

 

No,not really thought about a Jag before ...............link? Just for research of course.  :-D

Posted

That's it!

 

Close the thread for the rest of the day. Billy wins.

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...