Brown as fuck: 2001 BMW X5 3.0 - Exxon5!

[oldcars]

Baker Street achieved - we won’t be needing Sherlock to work out what I’ve bought unless he has a fault code reader5E1B4341-A6ED-467F-9232-711FB6780E55.jpeg

Winding your way down on Baker Street

Engine lights in your head and dead on your feet

Well, time for another crazy day

Your beemer will drink the fuel away

And forget about everything

This city makes you feel so cold

It's got so many people, but it's got no soul

And it's taken you so long

To find out you were right

When you make time to collect more shite

[SRi05]

Winding your way down on Baker Street

Engine lights in your head and dead on your feet

Well, time for another crazy day

Your beemer will drink the fuel away

And forget about everything

This city makes you feel so cold

It's got so many people, but it's got no soul

And it's taken you so long

To find out you were right

When you make time to collect more shite

SAX SOLO

[Kiltox]

Just found the invoice for £41,345.45

[cort16]

For the 40,000 mile service ?

[cort16]

The build sheet is probably under the rear seat squab if you can be bothered looking .

[taxi paul]

Very nice. One day I shall really really look at one.

[Pillock]

SAX SOLO

Awwwww good old Bob Holness on the sax.

[rantingYoof]

Just found the invoice for £41,345.45

Adjusted for inflation that's the best part of £64000.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

For the 40,000 service.

[Kiltox]

The mahogany leather etc is listed on the invoice I’ll scan it at some point

 

Surprisingly they only took a £1000 deposit for it - I would’ve wanted far more to not be lumbered with that colour choice if I was the dealer!!

[SiC]

Has it blown up yet?

 

No? Boring.

[Split_Pin]

Lovely motor, I bet it wafts. I'd feel like a hi-rollin shite playa in that.

 

But 16 mpg. Six teen m p g !

[Kiltox]

It does waft, yessir.

 

We don’t talk about MPG

[Split_Pin]

Best approach.

[Bren]

Sorry but the paint and interior combo is fit.

[Pillock]

Needs wood panelling down the side.

[Kiltox]

Found a receipt in the history for “investigate why horn sounds at random intervals” resulting in work to the wiring / clock spring area, couple of years ago.

 

Have they damaged the wiring for the cruise control switch I wonder.....

[Bren]

Found a receipt in the history for “investigate why horn sounds at random intervals” resulting in work to the wiring / clock spring area, couple of years ago.

Have they damaged the wiring for the cruise control switch I wonder.....

"Clock spring"

Fnarr Fnarr

[SiC]

Found a receipt in the history for “investigate why horn sounds at random intervals” resulting in work to the wiring / clock spring area, couple of years ago.

 

Have they damaged the wiring for the cruise control switch I wonder.....

Or wrong clock spring installed that didn't pass through the cruise button wiring?

 

Is this an auto or manual? If manual, check clutch switch.

 

Possibly your DS150e will hopefully give live read out of the cruise button states. That'll tell you which buttons are working.

[vaughant]

I had an X5 in for paint back in 2009 but the V8 version.

I must say I loved it, I had my ML at the time but this felt like a totally different car, more like a car really, sporty and handled great.

Only issue was MPG, WOW, still the thirstiest car I've driven to date, single figures pretty much everywhere, can't say I wasn't making good progress though.

I like the X5, especially from 2008 on (E53???)Sure it has a chav reputation but who cares? I still think it's less of a liability than a rangey of the same era!!!

[BavarianRetro]

Pre 2007 - E53 - the last acceptably good car made by BMW - just a big E39 525ix really.

 

2007 on E70. The epitome of where it went wrong.

[hairnet]

For the 40,000 mile service ?

Cup of coffee in the dealer before they bum you

[Lacquer Peel]

Any signs of 4x4 tech STOLEN from Land Rover?

[NorfolkNWeigh]

Found a receipt in the history for “investigate why horn sounds at random intervals” resulting in work to the wiring / clock spring area, couple of years ago.

Have they damaged the wiring for the cruise control switch I wonder.....

A dodgy person would send it in for the airbag recall, then phone them the next day to complain that the cruise control isn't working...

[beko1987]

Any signs of 4x4 tech STOLEN from Land Rover?

What, like a removable rear propshaft for increased mpg?

[Kiltox]

Any two bucket wronguns got an opinion on how to sort the windscreen out? It was swirl marks all over like it’s been cleaned with a scourer, so does the rear window. Fine during the day but a bit of a pain at night.

[hennabm]

My insurance company has a £70 excess on "normal" cars but £140 for my X5 as "it is a big screen".

 

It does have the light and rain sensor in it and mine is an 8 pin version. The early ones were 4 pin apparently.

[Pillock]

It's very hard to polish without leaving new, interesting swirl marks in.... Which you only see at night so you don't realise you made it worse until you're out and about.

[Kiltox]

Wonder if the dealer did just that, then?

 

Insurance isn’t really an option.

[Kiltox]

Fault code reading session #1

 

Objective - investigate PDC and cruise control

 

All of the rear sensors are reporting open circuit so I assume there is a wiring fault. Front sensors work fine.

 

Cruise control buttons on the wheel work as expected and the light on the instrument cluster works too

 

There was a “Multifunction steering wheel - interface” code on the engine/standard OBD fault codes though.

 

Along with “exhaust camshaft sensor - signal” but we won’t talk about that here

[BavarianRetro]

For cruise, push I/O button to switch it on. You should see the symbol on the screen.

 

Press the "+" button to set the speed, and the "+" and "-" to adjust it.

 

The top button that looks as though it's to set it is actually to reset it if you brake or go above the set speed.