What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[vulgalour]

Today I learned you can buy Applejack coloured paper to work on quite easily.

[Guest Hooli]

10 days without a FTP, must be a goona record.

[Guest Hooli]

Ebay adverts like this - http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/2004-SMART-ROADSTER-PIECE-OF-EXCREMENT-ONLY-SELLING-AS-MY-WIFE-HAS-LEFT-ME-/291787514817

[saucedoctor]

Brilliant!

[cms206]

1997 Peugeot 406LXDT estate.

 

 

Sent from my SM-G930F using Tapatalk

[vulgalour]

You should totally go with City, I imagine they provide a heated garage, chaffeur and limitless fuel.

[richbraith]

Small animals, yesterday I got to play with kittens, today I went up to the stable to turn out my mum's horse (that's NOT a euphemism) and there were lambs and chicks, plus there were very small bees pollinating in our garden.  This made me happy and I listened to Neneh Cherry as well.

[nacho man]

Been to take me 82 yr old grandad to have a look at a s type r

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[nacho man]

He reckones he wants something with a bit more oomph than that

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[xtriple]

Been and got the dollop out of the garage for the first time in two weeks. It is very strange how constant use of it jades the experience and it becomes 'just another car' but don't use it for a while and fuck me, it's superb to get back in and drive it! I have been 'joy riding' round Torquay with the windows down, dogs heads hanging out of the back windows, Pink Floyd on the (truly excellent 97 speaker system   ) and making FULL use of the turbocharger! Again, use it every day and I forget what a quick thing it is, try it after two weeks in an MX5 and that surge of effortless and silent power just astounds me! You just press the pedal a little bit harder than normal and everything behind goes into reverse.

 

After a few days of use, I start to worry about the fuel consumption and tyre wear and how much whatever else has just gone wrong is going to cost me and I forget to enjoy owning/driving the car itself. This in itself is excuse enough to own two (or more) cars. With just the Bentley, I reckon I would have got fed up with it by now (I usually get tired of cars very quickly, unless they are just boring, grey porridge transport like the Honda) as it is not the most cost effective form of transport!

 

The other thing I forget is every bugger talks to you in the Bentley! You honestly cannot park it anywhere without someone coming and having a chat: I had just got it out of the garage and it was just burbling away to itself (dogs on guard duty in the back) while I put the Mazda away and two people stopped to talk to me about it.

 

Now, if I could train it to chat up women....

[fordperv]

  On 13/06/2016 at 15:46, xtriple said:

I have been 'joy riding' round Torquay with the windows down, dogs heads hanging out of the back windows, Pink Floyd on the (truly excellent 97 speaker system )

I'm surprised there's any space in it for the dogs with 97 speakers on board

[forddeliveryboy]

From the Independent: "A man in the Red House area of Sunderland was arrested for assaulting his neighbour after accusing him of teasing his black tomcat. As PC Hansom drove off with the cat's owner, he ran over and killed the cat."

[dollywobbler]

That doesn't make me grin.

[forddeliveryboy]

Sorry about that, the humour was rather dark. Not all senses of humour are the same. Try this:

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=8wGRI5DNm7M#t=223

[nacho man]

  On 13/06/2016 at 14:38, Danterzza said:

Been to take me 82 yr old grandad to have a look at a s type r

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Even though he sent he said he wanted something with a bit more oomph. He just rang me to say he has sorted the insurance, and it's only a 100 quid extra, so we had a blast in it ands it's a one owner, full history, all new discs and pads with newish continentals type motor, what major things should I look for on these???

[DeeJay]

Are you going to be a named driver 

[hairnet]

  On 13/06/2016 at 16:38, Danterzza said:

what major things should I look for on these???

blue lights in the mirror

 

speedo pointing at 3 o clock

[twosmoke300]

Rust !

[Brodders]

  On 13/06/2016 at 12:28, Hooli said:

Ebay adverts like this - http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/2004-SMART-ROADSTER-PIECE-OF-EXCREMENT-ONLY-SELLING-AS-MY-WIFE-HAS-LEFT-ME-/291787514817

That is the greatest advert I have ever read, closely followed by the advert he has up for the job lot of his Ex's possessions.

[nacho man]

  On 13/06/2016 at 17:57, twosmoke300 said:

Rust !

 

 

 

Do i need to some inspections underneath? it looks like it was sorted, to be fair the bloke dealt in loads of xk8's and said there forever welding them up, so hopefully he knew what he was doing.

 

 

Registration number: DU53HAA

 

• Vehicle makeJAGUAR
• Vehicle modelS TYPE
• Date first used19 September 2003
• Fuel typePetrol
• ColourBlack

 

MOT history of this vehicle

• Test date28 August 2015
• Expiry date27 August 2016
• Test ResultPass
• Odometer reading101,858 miles
• MOT test number1038 0338 1300
• Advisory notice item(s)
  nearside rear upper Suspension arm has slight play in a ball joint (2.4.G.2)

  rear registration plate deteriorated but not likely to be misread (6.3.1d)

• Test date18 August 2015
• Test ResultFail
• Odometer reading101,858 miles
• MOT test number4766 7285 3163
• Reason(s) for failure
  nearside outer Seat belt anchorage prescribed area is excessively corroded Sill (5.2.6)

  offside outer Seat belt anchorage prescribed area is excessively corroded Sill (5.2.6)

  nearside rear lower Shock absorber has an excessively worn bush (2.7.4)

  offside rear lower Shock absorber has an excessively worn bush (2.7.4)
• Advisory notice item(s)
  nearside rear upper Suspension arm has slight play in a ball joint (2.4.G.2)

  rear registration plate deteriorated but not likely to be misread (6.3.1d)

• Test date21 August 2014
• Expiry date21 August 2015
• Test ResultPass
• Odometer reading98,479 miles
• MOT test number7367 4393 4208
• Advisory notice item(s)
  Nearside Front Brake pad(s) wearing thin (3.5.1g)

  Offside Front Brake pad(s) wearing thin (3.5.1g)

  Nearside Rear Lower Shock absorber has a slightly worn bush (2.7.4)

  Offside Rear Lower Shock absorber has a slightly worn bush (2.7.4)

  Rear registration plate deteriorated but not likely to be misread (6.3.1d)

  engine light on

[fred]

  On 13/06/2016 at 17:57, Brodders said:

That is the greatest advert I have ever read, closely followed by the advert he has up for the job lot of his Ex's possessions.

That is the funniest Ad Ive seen in ages

[quicksilver]

Solved a mystery that had been bugging me for years and seems to have confused everyone else too. My Gaydon catalogue from when the museum first opened (over 20 years ago!) shows the Queen's Rover P5B registered JGY 280K but I had only ever seen what I assumed was the same car with JGY 280 plates and wondered which was wrong. Turns out Her Maj has two identical cars (she still owns them) and replaced JGY 280 with JGY 280K, and both are now together at Gaydon after the latter had been hidden away for years. Every other photo of JGY 280 I've seen confuses it with JGY 280K and captions it as a 1970s P5B but it's apparently a 1963 3-litre. Spot the difference...

 

JGY 280

1963 Rover P5 3-litre by Adam Floyd, on Flickr

 

JGY 280K

1971 Rover P5B 3.5-litre by Adam Floyd, on Flickr

 

Edited to add an interesting* fact. Royal cars don't show up on the DVLA car check thingy.

[dome]

  On 13/06/2016 at 07:06, michael1703 said:

Marty Ashton

 

https://youtu.be/wToZJ_bfUYM

 

I like these determined people that don't give up

Saw him at Fort William world cup last weekend. He shows that anything is possible if you put your mind to it.

[michael1703]

  On 13/06/2016 at 20:15, quicksilver said:

Solved a mystery that had been bugging me for years and seems to have confused everyone else too. My Gaydon catalogue from when the museum first opened (over 20 years ago!) shows the Queen's Rover P5B registered JGY 280K but I had only ever seen what I assumed was the same car with JGY 280 plates and wondered which was wrong. Turns out Her Maj has two identical cars (she still owns them) and replaced JGY 280 with JGY 280K, and both are now together at Gaydon after the latter had been hidden away for years. Every other photo of JGY 280 I've seen confuses it with JGY 280K and captions it as a 1970s P5B but it's apparently a 1963 3-litre. Spot the difference...

 

JGY 280

1963 Rover P5 3-litre by Adam Floyd, on Flickr

 

JGY 280K

1971 Rover P5B 3.5-litre by Adam Floyd, on Flickr

 

Edited to add an interesting* fact. Royal cars don't show up on the DVLA car check thingy.

That chrome trim is wrong, 3 litre chrome trims don't meet the indicator, they stop short and angle downwards

[michael1703]

  On 13/06/2016 at 20:28, dome said:

Saw him at Fort William world cup last weekend. He shows that anything is possible if you put your mind to it.

Whereas I struggle to put my socks on most mornings

[AMC Rebel]

  On 13/06/2016 at 20:15, quicksilver said:

Solved a mystery that had been bugging me for years and seems to have confused everyone else too. My Gaydon catalogue from when the museum first opened (over 20 years ago!) shows the Queen's Rover P5B registered JGY 280K but I had only ever seen what I assumed was the same car with JGY 280 plates and wondered which was wrong. Turns out Her Maj has two identical cars (she still owns them) and replaced JGY 280 with JGY 280K, and both are now together at Gaydon after the latter had been hidden away for years. Every other photo of JGY 280 I've seen confuses it with JGY 280K and captions it as a 1970s P5B but it's apparently a 1963 3-litre. Spot the difference...

 

JGY 280

1963 Rover P5 3-litre by Adam Floyd, on Flickr

 

JGY 280K

1971 Rover P5B 3.5-litre by Adam Floyd, on Flickr

 

Edited to add an interesting* fact. Royal cars don't show up on the DVLA car check thingy.

 

JGY 280 (the apparent 3 litre) seems to be wearing later 3.5 litre badges?

[quicksilver]

  On 13/06/2016 at 21:01, michael1703 said:

That chrome trim is wrong, 3 litre chrome trims don't meet the indicator, they stop short and angle downwards

 

 

  On 13/06/2016 at 21:04, AMC Rebel said:

JGY 280 (the apparent 3 litre) seems to be wearing later 3.5 litre badges?

Looks like Queenie had JGY 280 upgraded to full 3.5-litre P5B spec as the Rostyles were never originally fitted to the 3-litre cars either, hence the confusion I guess. Assuming the 1963 date is correct it was definitely a 3-litre originally as Rover didn't buy the V8 until '67. Whatever the story, they're definitely two different cars and not the same one as almost everyone thinks, because I saw both on the same day.

[NorfolkNWeigh]

It looks to me as if she just transferred JGY 280 to a P5b, the number must have had some personal significance for her to have had JGY280K on the later one.

A Rover 3 litre

 

A Rover 3.5 litre

[AMC Rebel]

  On 13/06/2016 at 16:38, Danterzza said:

Even though he sent he said he wanted something with a bit more oomph. He just rang me to say he has sorted the insurance, and it's only a 100 quid extra, so we had a blast in it ands it's a one owner, full history, all new discs and pads with newish continentals type motor, what major things should I look for on these???

All suspension bushes are made of cheese and will fail regularly from age or mileage.  Gearboxes - IIRC there are two kinds Cheese and Chocolate.  Can't remember the changeover but the earlier ones are supposed to be stronger (5 speed I think) and later ones smoother but weaker (6 speed from memory).  Make sure all electrics work as anything that doesn't will be costly to fix.

[jakebullet]

ZOMG how many left? action in a disabled space outside lidl !!!!!!

 

MOT history says it has 183K miles with no fails ever.