Autoshite Quote of the Year 2014 - Please Add

[HH-R]

About everyone's favourite* car, the VW Golf:

 

Let's have a look.

 

One involves buying expensive shit to impress the boss. The other is a game.

 

One involves endless time at work/pub/home twatting on and on and on about how great it is. The other is a game.

 

One of them is something you buy into, because you think it makes you great. The other is a game.

 

I had a good hearty LOL at this. It's so true!

[raggerminder]

Sornme:

 

 

It's easy to buy things and then think what the fuck have I done? We've all done that or are justabout to do it.

[cms206]

Courtesy of Autoshite's Lawyer of Choice...

 

"I saw a mid blue late model Beta Coupe on the way back, but he was four cars ahead of me and turned off my route before I could catch up to moon my hairy cleft at him while overtaking on two wheels.  I is disappoint."

[Junkman]

As one roll of mig wire ends another begins.

[anonymous user]

CMS206 about his Volvo raffle prize

 

might need to burn the parcel shelf as it looks like it's been used to sand down a jack russell.

[saucedoctor]

Yeah i've still got a load of porn from when i was a teenager...........though to be fair i wish i'd kept my XR2 instead.

[twosmoke300]

Courtesy of Mr Partridge " vegatarian food is fine if you add meat to it."

[rml2345]

Of a Jetta in the tat thread with slightly ropey photos...

Picture's not the best but I would LICK this all over till all the edges had smoothed off to a sort of large pebble shape.

[chaseracer]

Of the A-OK BX in NZ...
 

Nothing says you've made it in life better than a plastic C-pillar window.

 

[Caffiend]

 

Just tried to edit my signature on Invision site but it insists on changing http://autoshite.com to http://Autofaecese.com

I think the maestro just won ...

 

[rml2345]

Describing the Metrocab...

The Scimitar Picasso Diesel is about the most unreliable piece of hateful shit to roll on God's good earth.

[Craig the Princess]

How I laughed as I sat there with a wiring diagram, multimeter and my hopes and dreams cascading into a dark, echoing void of oblivion.

[Craig the Princess]

A quick poke reveals the windscreen surround to be made up of silicon sealant and rust ... with less strength than dried weetabix.

 

Another thing to ignore for now

[DVee8]

Cort16 said

Having the sunroof open and windows down is unbearably noisey over 35mph and creates enough turbulance to lift a bag of turnips out the passenger seat.

[Spiny Norman]

Stop trying to groom me using baked goods as a lever.

[KruJoe]

That tie is flipping GRADE A. I was so impressed I just went on eBay and bought an 'Ipswich Park & Ride' bus drivers tie to wear in the office. Inspired!!!

 

 

I'm not sure it says STRATHCLYDE REGIONAL COUNCIL enough on it to emphasise that it represents the region that was disbanded eighteen years ago. It's my second favourite tie now after my brown polyester Leyland Vehicles one which is always a hit in the office.

[Rusty Pelican]

Pillocks quote cracked me up

 

It had a nice driving position bit also the performance of a snail gaffer-taped to a rock,

[chaseracer]

...my rebellion is not against authority or parents (I am still ambivalent to both) but against the IKEA/McDonalds/OMGNEWCAR wasteland of consumer desire and the bloody telly.   Old cars, rock and roll and screw tomorrow...

The AS mission statement, my friends - right there.

[vulgalour]

I'm busy that day.

 

Whatever day it might be.

[warren t claim]

From Mr Ramrod, "You couldn't wish to meet a more textbook arsehole if you spent a week doing nothing but dream up the specification".

[Pillock]

Mr B's summary of W.Railfare's new Mazda MPV

 

I reckon you could forget these exist even if one was parked on your foot.

[Joey spud]

This made me smile from Pillocks MGF collection thread..

 

''Anyway, we were met at the station by Bobthebeard, who didn't have a beard and wasn't called Bob. That's internet forums for you''

[Craig the Princess]

Sadly this will have to wait as yet again it's not charging! It's like this fucking car doesn't want to be saved.

 

 

We have all been here.

[chaseracer]

Being a bit of a sociopath, I take great delight in watching people hurt themselves on the internet...

 

[rml2345]

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Bateman-AGILATOR-ATV-6WD-Farm-Quad-Tractor-Agrocat-6x6-1275-A-Mini-Metro-Engine-/331306714637

 

 

Bateman Agilator! I think they followed this up with the Crodocile.

 

From this angle it looks like you would drive it standing up, like an all-terrain phone booth.

[Rusty Pelican]

From ruffgeezer

 

My greatest shame, the Purp had a truly outstanding paint job, unfortunately, it was laid over a rotten shell, much like spraying glitter on a dog turd:

[mouseflakes]

Knock knock!

Who's there?

Not your big end bearings anymore!

 

Go 'Like' the original post here...

http://autoshite.com/topic/18041-giz-us-a-tug-the-recovery-truck-thread/?p=626524

[CreepingJesus]

r.welfare on farting...

 

 

 

...a sound similar to chucking a bag of tools into a peat bog.

[r.welfare]

I think I stole that line from a Clive James autobiography to be fair.

[vulgalour]

I couldn't see what I was fixing. I ended up with exhaust paste in my arm pit and had to T-cut it off the screen of my phone.