silly sayings, feel free to add

[58classiccars]

dont come running to me when you break your leg feel free to add

[retrogeezer]

cheap at half the price!

[Mash]

cheap at half the price!

That one's always bugged me because surely it should be "cheap at twice the price".

 

My understanding is that the saying is used to imply something is surprisingly cheap and therefore is misquoted seeing as the person wants to illustrate the item would be still cheap in fact if it were twice that?

 

Or perhaps I shouldn't care about trivialities so much....

[Father Ted]

Its like Nann Razza

(its f*king huge)

 

Mouth Like Ghandis Flip Flop

(I appear to have been out on the razz last night and had the contents of an ashtray emptied into my mouth)

 

Bit Whooing Go out

(foggy)

 

Robbin Under't riddle

(its a bit of a faff)

 

Couldnt stop a pig in a ginnell

(You have bandy legs)

 

Belm

(I do believe you may be telling fibs)

 

P-Bellllllllllm

(now you really are stretching credulity)

 

Ye Deacon

(you fool)

 

That be pesh / pearl that be

(that is rather nice)

 

Hes as fawce as a ferret that one

( he is not to be trusted)

 

Sken

(cross eyed / to look at - as in "lets have a sken")

 

Eggwap

(you fool)

 

Gobbin

(even bigger fool)

 

Meither (hard I)

(to annoy)

 

I were thrutchin for yonks but nowt happened

(I was straining on the lavatory, but nothing came out)

 

Put wood in't ole

(shut the door - were you born in a barn?)

 

Jiggered

Po-fagged

knacked

(tired out)

 

Corporation Pop

(H2O)

[Tayne]

.

[trigger]

Mouth Like Ghandis Flip Flop

(I appear to have been out on the razz last night and had the contents of an ashtray emptied into my mouth)

My wife a while back told me that she "Has a mouth like Geldof's flip flop"

 

She's also said whilst taking a photo for me that she "No David Bellamy".

 

I thinks she's been with me for too long!

[GJR 11L]

I were thrutchin for yonks but nowt happened

I like that so much, I've paid tribute to its wonderfulness by setting it as a signature.

[Minimad5]

I were thrutchin for yonks but nowt happened

(I was straining on the lavatory, but nothing came out)

Fantastic ! , i have to adopt that one

 

Edit:

 

Damn John beat me to it

[Guest]

Yorks \ Lancs Edition

 

Ah wer' stud 'ere lakk Piffy on a rock!

(You kept me waiting for ages).

 

Bugger this for a game o' soldiers!

(This is shit, goodbye).

 

Aaaaaaaaeeeeeeephiddddddd.

(Insects).

 

Summut wit' thing, laake a string.

(Tampon).

 

Aaaalll be dammed, ten foot, be bummed! (Hull special)

(Don't go down the alley way but for unless you like taking it up the arse).

 

Liverpool Edition

 

Eyyyyhhh, uurrrrhhh, yew fookn sket.

(Hello my dear, you look like a slag).

 

Ehhh, ahmm nhot Skouse, ahm jush borrowen iht!

(Please do not base your prejudice on my city of origin, however, I am purloining your tax disc.)

 

Stockport Edition

 

Eaaaahhhhhhhh yo, yerr chattin some BARE maccoh!

(Please be quiet, you are talking bollocks).

 

SCTSH_ANDY Edition

 

Aye, yrr skooshers erhh slight!

(Your windscreen washers are broken and are on the piss relative to where they should be on your bonnet).

 

Duz ye gan, Fhords rhh shyte!

(I do not like Fords. They are rubbish).

 

Griiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiizzzzzzzz

(Grease, not the film but the stuff used to pack out a CV joint).

 

Cabbajjjjjjjjjj

(Shift and 8 on your keyboard, i.e. *)

 

Incidentally, if you want to amuse and befuddle all and sundry in California, asking them about wood in'th'ole is a good start.

[58classiccars]

If I dont get £500 for the car I will scrap it

[binhoker668]

"I'll pan yer melt in!"

- I say, I shall biff you on the nose good sir!

 

Belfast is the home of the ridiculous threat/slaggin'.

You with me Ashmicro?

[Cavcraft]

'If you were nearer I'd have it off you'. Translates into timewaster running post count up.

[ashmicro]

Aye, Binhoker.

 

Belfast:

 

"Hey you, yer Granny's a mermaid" - you are a silly person

"Duncher" - flat cap

"Fried brain" - elderly person

"Buck eejit" - very silly person

"Auld lad/ Auld doll" - Old man/woman

"bad crack" - not cricket

"Catch yerself on" - wise up

"Wick" - very poor quality

"Give my head peace" - shut up and leave me alone

"BOUT YE!" - How are you?

"Do you think I came up the Lagan in a bubble?" - Do you think I was born yesterday? (The Lagan is the river that runs through Belfast.)

"Come on tae fuck" - Hurry up

 

Local to me, the dialect ranges from phrases like the above, to barely intelligible almost Ulster-Scots:

 

"Mine yon rid bai she's guttery" - Be careful on that road, it is slippery

"D'ya hay?" - Would you have?

[Pete-M]

Liverpool Edition

 

Eyyyyhhh, uurrrrhhh, yew fookn sket.

(Hello my dear, you look like a slag).

 

 

Sket? Never heard that one. Skank, on the other hand.

[seth]

"There's nowt as relevant as Autoshite on t'internet"

[whitevanman]

Aye, Binhoker.

 

Belfast:

 

"Hey you, yer Granny's a mermaid" - you are a silly person

"Duncher" - flat cap

"Fried brain" - elderly person

"Buck eejit" - very silly person

"Auld lad/ Auld doll" - Old man/woman

"bad crack" - not cricket

"Catch yerself on" - wise up

"Wick" - very poor quality

"Give my head peace" - shut up and leave me alone

"BOUT YE!" - How are you?

"Do you think I came up the Lagan in a bubble?" - Do you think I was born yesterday? (The Lagan is the river that runs through Belfast.)

"Come on tae fuck" - Hurry up

 

Local to me, the dialect ranges from phrases like the above, to barely intelligible almost Ulster-Scots:

 

"Mine yon rid bai she's guttery" - Be careful on that road, it is slippery

"D'ya hay?" - Would you have?

there is seldom much difference between Scots and Nothern Irish in phraseology....

[Station]

My wife a while back told me that she "Has a mouth like Geldof's flip flop"

 

She's also said whilst taking a photo for me that she "No David Bellamy".

 

I thinks she's been with me for too long!

My mum was watching 15 to 1 years ago and the question was who was the business partner of Ebenezer Scrooge, and the answer should've been 'Jacob Marley', but she said 'Bob Marley'. I LOLD!

[ashmicro]

Aye, Binhoker.

 

Belfast:

 

"Hey you, yer Granny's a mermaid" - you are a silly person

"Duncher" - flat cap

"Fried brain" - elderly person

"Buck eejit" - very silly person

"Auld lad/ Auld doll" - Old man/woman

"bad crack" - not cricket

"Catch yerself on" - wise up

"Wick" - very poor quality

"Give my head peace" - shut up and leave me alone

"BOUT YE!" - How are you?

"Do you think I came up the Lagan in a bubble?" - Do you think I was born yesterday? (The Lagan is the river that runs through Belfast.)

"Come on tae fuck" - Hurry up

 

Local to me, the dialect ranges from phrases like the above, to barely intelligible almost Ulster-Scots:

 

"Mine yon rid bai she's guttery" - Be careful on that road, it is slippery

"D'ya hay?" - Would you have?

there is seldom much difference between Scots and Nothern Irish in phraseology....

Yep, I'd agree with that, certainly in my part of NI. However, when one goes west of the River Bann, not only does the language and phraseology differ, the inhabitants are a distinctly different species.

[whitevanman]

Ohh how true, I'm quite "lucky" in that I can generally tell which area of Ireland the accents from by the most commonly used catchphrase by product of working over there for a long time

[Rod/b]

"Must dash, I need to drop the kids off at the pool"

 

Tr. Gotta run, I'm busting for a shit

[Mr Lobster]

"Must dash, I need to drop the kids off at the pool"

 

Tr. Gotta run, I'm busting for a shit

 

See also -

 

Send a sausage to the seaside,

 

Ride the logflume

 

etc etc etc

[Guest]

Ah its not working due to a rtfm error.

 

rtfm = Read the f*cking manual.

[chaseracer]

Ah its not working due to a rtfm error.

 

rtfm = Read the f*cking manual.

Similarly: "Yeah, it's a pebcak issue" - ('problem exists between chair and keyboard')

 

Or (my favourite, from the Owd Giffer: "What we have here is an electrical (or signal, depending on context) discontinuity scenario", ie. "You have failed to plug the bloody thing in..."

 

[Rod/b]

I quite like using the word "TWATHATS" as a profanity. I believe it's a village in Scotland.

[58classiccars]

the car will pass its m.o.t, I just dont have the time to test it.

[Pete-M]

I think my favourite of all time is a Sid the Sexist one;

 

"Polishing the pump action yoghurt rifle".

[Father Ted]

Brasting for a slash.

(I really do need a wee)

[Rod/b]

"It's a bit PEARL HARBOR out there"

 

Tr.It's bitterly cold outside as in "There's a nasty nip in the air"

[Mr H Sceptre]

Hippacroccodillypig - Unattractive lady

Swamp donkey - Unattractive lady

[Volksy]

Rhinosrobeast - Unattractive lady