The grumpy thread

[STUNO]

The old chap I sold a house to did the forwards instead of reverse thing soon after he moved in. 

The car took off forwards through the back of the garage and smashed through the wall of the neighbors garage.

So into reverse in a panic, back through the garage, through the 6' high front fence, across the road, through the hedge across the road and into the house. 

That was the last time he drove, it even made the paper with photos.

[For Fiats Sake]

I hadn't driven dads auto for a while and pressed the brake like a clutch when I came to the first road junction. Mum gave out a shout of my name in an annoyed manner, however she got her own back when test driving a manual after many years of auto's, stalling across the road with oncoming traffic. Luckily it was far enough away to give us time to move to safety.

[gm]

why is it so fucking cold ? bastard winter !

[Parky]

Admin. Just general admin.

 

This week my insurance was up for renewal. It is in Mrs P's name but I am named driver. I bought the car, chose insurer, pay policies and Mrs P doesn't have any interest or involvement in all this. In a nutshell I am not allowed to add NCD protection as I am not the policyholder. I am however allowed to pay for the policy on a card in my name. Person at Allianz refused to give me any info at all until they had spoken to Mrs P who was out at the time. What twat thought this sort of thing qualified as data protection when it obviously isn't...

 

Next up - Premium Bonds. Had a bit of OT last month so thought I would buy the kids another premium bond each to add to their 18th birthday boxes. They already have a few each. Decided to buy them on the phone but wasn't allowed as I didn't have an NSAndI number. Despite having existing bonds I wasn't allowed to top them up. Utter bullshit. So I decided to buy them online and after the process found that I could only buy one for my daughter, and not my sons one that way. Total utter bullshit. So sent off a paper application form and cheque for my son. Paper application with a cheque, how very quaint!

 

This morning I get a letter to tell me that they can't process my Daughters application as they need proof of her identity. FFS people she is an existing bloody client! They now want copies of her passport or drivers licence and a utility bill in her name. She is 14 and we are talking about a £100 investment.

 

National Savings are obviously paranoid about drug money being laundered through them and what better way to do that than for someone to put £100 of their ill gotten into the system in their Daughters name. Jeez.

 

Also found this morning that AO have set up a dd on my account for insurance on an appliance I bought with them recently despite telling them I didn't want it. Naughty naughty. So my Saturday is going to be spent arguing with stupid people.

 

And somewhere in amongst all that I have a fence panel to fix which normally I wouldn't mind but it's bloody cold out there today!

[purplebargeken]

Woke up to see great globs of very large snow flakes hurtling down (never up unfortunately). Too wet for it to stick. Now stopped and normal damp Saturday weather has resumed. Pah.

[bub2006]

Toying with idea of selling the vectra

[michael1703]

captain 70's

 

I was thinking that if you are determined enough to change your ways that you've put a for sale sign on your dolomite,your determined enough to do other changes that might help.

 

January first, get the clippers and shave the hair and facial hair off

 

Your young enough for it to grow back if you don't like it, you might feel empowered by it

 

Years ago when I grew my hair long it felt like a curtain of gloom to hide behind,shaving it off helped lift the mood

[the judge]

I agree with the above.

 

Fuck off online stuff,and change everything up. Life laundry??

 

Having said that,there is someone for everyone out there dude

[cms206]

Watching people upload pictures of snow in their area when The SVM are off on a 540 mile round trip collection tomorrow morning to collect a car with no fucking heating.

[Eddie Honda]

 

captain 70's

[snip]

January first, get the clippers and shave the hair and facial hair off

 

Your young enough for it to grow back if you don't like it, you might feel empowered by it

 

Years ago when I grew my hair long it felt like a curtain of gloom to hide behind,shaving it off helped lift the mood

Is this a joke? He looks fucking cool.

 

Yes, it's a trap captain 70's

 

[Jazoli]

Watching people upload pictures of snow in their area when The SVM are off on a 540 mile round trip collection tomorrow morning to collect a car with no fucking heating.

 

From last night

 

 

And a picturesque one from work today

[oldcars]

Do you work in the smart hotel in Bowness, not the Macdonald but the other one?

[Parky]

Called National Savings. Upshot is they thought it was a new investment hence the letter asking for identification. However in order to get this new investment added to my daughters existing account I have to write a letter requesting that and they MAY be able to do it.

 

Screw that I said. Cancel the deal and I will send a cheque and application form. Ok sir said they, you have to write in to cancel the deal. However I can't send the cancellation and application together as they are two separate departments, I have to send both separately.

 

When asked if the telephone dealing and helpline could do anything NOT in writing was informed that everything needs to be in writing. What a useless fucking waste of money, an entire department manned 24/7 whose job it is to tell you to send any requests in writing. If I could buy premium bonds from a different government, I would. In fact I wonder if I can buy The swedish equivalent? I can buy NZ bonds through the wife, might do that instead in future. Buy the kiwis an aircraft carrier or something.

 

AO worked better. So why do you want to cancel your insurance sir? None of your business says I. Er ok then, fair enough, can't argue with that! Too right you can't matey, too right you can't.

 

Was feeling very bolshie.

 

In happier news I haz fixed fence despite almost dying of exposure in Baltic conditions

[Jazoli]

Do you work in the smart hotel in Bowness, not the Macdonald but the other one?

I do indeed, its a fantastic building, I'm the site manager there ☺

[Lukas]

Yesterday, a drunk young man tried to set our dustbin on fire. Did not work because it rained, thankfully. What should I do next time, while observing that? Go out and beat him up? 

[Pillock]

Weirdly, I had that. I yelled at him, he apologised and wandered off. Most random.

But I reckon responding with violence would be acceptable if it was needed, that's the sort of lesson you can't really deliver with a chat and some powerpoint.

[hairnet]

he sets fire to your bin you set fire to his hair

[Parky]

Could you not leave something really flammable in the bin to give him a little surprise if he tries it again?

[mercrocker]

Probably best to put the dustbin away from the house, fill it with aerosols (hairspray works well) and keep topping up the lighter fluid.

 

 

 

Parky beat me to it!

[Sealtainn]

When your kids present a Christmas list and you purchase several items from it and 3 weeks later you get another one with completely different things on and a declaration that everything on the other list "is pants" FFS !!!!  

[strangeangel]

Yesterday, a drunk young man tried to set our dustbin on fire. Did not work because it rained, thankfully. What should I do next time, while observing that? Go out and beat him up? 

 

Film the tard and hope he falls into the bin, sets fire to his trousers etc. Post video on Youtube, and when it goes viral use the proceeds to buy two Citroen CX estates with no MOT.

[hairnet]

the tesco ad where the annoying twat sidles up to some woman and starts talking about roularde

 

id be hitting him over the head with the bottle she had in her hand

 

RRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Bren]

the tesco ad where the annoying twat sidles up to some woman and starts talking about roularde

 

id be hitting him over the head with the bottle she had in her hand

 

RRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I concur - if he was at my local I would br brandishing a broken bottle at the twat.

 

To be fair, the female is fucking bang tidy.

[MarvinsMom]

all the Mog soft toys are sold out at Sainsbury's.

 

bollocks, ah well, lets see on fleabay.....

 

the £10 toy start with a minimum £15 mark up.

 

screw it, dunno whether to sack off a toy mog, or just pay the mark-up (cos thats capitalism-innit) 

 

it is afterall, just something that will end up collecting dust on a shelf, i may go without.

[DVee8]

I have had a strange 2 days.Yesterday,went into the bathroom cupboard to get my shaving gear,our lass has a box of 750 ear sticks(cotton wool buds on a stick) the box jumps of the shelf and deposits the contents across the floor.Spend ages picking these little thing up.

 Head down stairs flick the kettle on open the cupboard for cups,the glass coffee pot that i haven't seen for ages never mind used jumped out of the cupboard and smashed on the floor spent ages sweeping glass up.

 

Take the youngest to school there is a knowhow truck blocking my drive delivering a washer to over the road,had to wait till finished.

 

Today

The kitchen sink full of soapy water,i some how managed to knock the remote for the kitchen tv into the sink doh.

I open the X-Trails drivers door a light bulb falls out and smashes on the drive.

 

What did make me smile over the road dumped the old washer on the pavement for the pikies to collect she pulled of the drive forgot it was there and hit it with the front bumper while reversing off the drive.

[MarvinsMom]

When your kids present a Christmas list and you purchase several items from it and 3 weeks later you get another one with completely different things on and a declaration that everything on the other list "is pants" FFS !!!!

 

i can do better than that. 

 

approximately 1984 i went daft for a scalexctric having played with one of the other kids down the street set at some point. only to decide that with a week or so to go til the big day that i didn't want a scalextctrix but some lego instead.

 

as lego would be much more fun.

 

my father ended up having to take this bloody big slot car back to the shop, Romer & Parish in Middlesbrough at dinnertime, on Xmas eve.

 

he did manage to change the gift to the required lego set....

 

my old gaffer one year ended up travelling far and wide over the north of england in the attempt to buy Thunderbirds Tracy Island one year, it is something that all parents have to go through.

 

i'm glad i don't have kids.......

[STUNO]

National Savings. Upshot is Screw that I said. Cancel the deal What a useless fucking waste of money,I can buy NZ bonds through the wife, might do that instead in future. Buy the kiwis an aircraft carrier or something.

Yes please, we haven't got one of those. And we would like some big aeroplanes to use on it too, we have only got little ones and a few helicopters.

The local bonds don't pay interest, they do a draw for a million dollar prize each month.

[jakebullet]

Kinky girl + PMT = not the best day out of my life.

 

Starts out she's been crying 'cos been to see mental people n they upset her.

Went to cinema which was ok apart from other people's bastard kids.

Came out and she has mega mardy on that she's paid 10 quid for hair cut and they've fucked it up the fuckers, and she's going to burn their fucking shop down.

Then morrisons must die because their bread doesn't defrost properly to make fish finger sarnies.

Go to bed. No sexy time. Wake up. No sexy time n knee to plums to make sure I get message.

 

Usual Ma face on on return home.

 

TL:DR

wimmin.

[DVee8]

^^ It don't get any better.Just got to live with it

[bub2006]

Black ice. That is all.................