The grumpy thread

[xtriple]

Myself and the mutts have been involved in a Photoshoot today (see elsewhere for details if you are sad, bored and desperate for a laugh!)  and when I enquired as to why my fizog was required, the answer pissed me right off...

 

'Because you have wrinkles and facial hair and they'll show up well in black and white!'

 

Not fucking happy....

 

Am really!

[Station]

Watching modern Scooby Doo cartoon. Fred fancies Velma who has straightened her hair and is dressed as a whore, he's full of angst, and says he's no longera man because he now has feelings. Velma is in a girl rock band, complete with a full length generic rock song in the style of Avril Lavigne. Scooby and Shaggy are with a rock star on his tour bus. It has that manga anime style that looks fucking crap when westerners draw it and Scooby Doo sounds like Yoda after he's he's had a stroke, it's UTTER shit! It makes no sense whatsoever and the supposed story line meanders all over the place, has absolutely nothing in common with the original, and is so piss poor!

[AlabamaShrimp]

Watching modern Scooby Doo cartoon. Fred fancies Velma who has straightened her hair and is dressed as a whore, he's full of angst, and says he's no longera man because he now has feelings. Velma is in a girl rock band, complete with a full length generic rock song in the style of Avril Lavigne. Scooby and Shaggy are with a rock star on his tour bus. It has that manga anime style that looks fucking crap when westerners draw it and Scooby Doo sounds like Yoda after he's he's had a stroke, it's UTTER shit! It makes no sense whatsoever and the supposed story line meanders all over the place, has absolutely nothing in common with the original, and is so piss poor!

What you mean you don't fancy Velma?

 

[Station]

Of course! But disappointed by modern cartoon. :,(

[M'coli]

Forget the modern cartoon, there's a porn version with Bobbi Starr as Velma...

[MarvinsMom]

the standard of driving is quiet shocking....it is amazing that some of these "people" can walk and breath at the sametime, but how the fuck did they EVER pass a driving test (and i know i am not at all faultless all the time when behind the wheel)

 

i've been over at the father in laws all day, which is situated in a smallish village on the A64 part way between malton and scarborough/

 

today must have been the pineappled mopngtard window licking stace yo drifteded half wits day out, all silly little boys in their aldi,,bmwhocares, god knows what POS  things racing each other through the village.

 

30 and 40 mph zone-these don't apply it seems.

 

then there was the dipsticks on the crotch rockets.... every bit as bad, if not worse.

 

i've never seen someone pul a wheelie on the wrong side of the road into oncoming traffic, but i have today.

 

some folks do not deserve to live, and when they cause some bloody big crash, it will be everyone elses fault, and some blameless shmo with get themselves killed.

 

knob heads

[EssDeeWon]

Missed out on some bullet door mirrors for the Rover on Ebay today, so Ebay are sending me alternatives to bid on. That's a good idea I thought....

 

Except I don't own a 2009 Land Rover Discovery, or need new mirrors for a 2009 Discovery !!!

 

Fuckin Tits!

[cms206]

Three letters for me today to inform me that I have to submit a self assesment tax return for 2011/12, 2012/13 and 2013/14 and pay back tax by 9/9/15. There is 600 quid outstanding which they were supposed to have been deducting from my wages over the last three years to cover a fuck up caused by a company which are no longer trading.

 

Awesome.

 

:@

[Station]

Missed out on some bullet door mirrors for the Rover on Ebay today, so Ebay are sending me alternatives to bid on. That's a good idea I thought....

 

Except I don't own a 2009 Land Rover Discovery, or need new mirrors for a 2009 Discovery !!!

 

Fuckin Tits!

We're sorry you've missed out on your bullet mirrors, but you may be interested in this:

 

[Pillock]

Is that Billy's dog with a spraytan?

[fred]

Ebays recommended links are like a druggie offering you shit for his next hit

[Station]

Is that Billy's dog with a spraytan?

Looks like a real tan, I think Billy forgot the crack the window open a bit on a hot day, and some vigilante has gone and smashed the rear windows, showering cloud dog with glass bits.

[Cavcraft]

You carry on, I'll tell him what you bastards said about him and when I bring him to a car show, you'll be sorry. He'll lick you for ages then piss on your tyres.

 

 

 

 

Doing my head in recently is a spate of w*nkers on Gumtree advertising stuff then when you message them they say 'had loads of enquiries so I now want X amount (more) for it.' Tell you what then, knobhead, put it at that price to start off with as I ain't paying a penny more, you greedy bastard. The price is the price and should be honoured.

Example: Yesterday me and my daft mate offered to cut someone's hedge, mown the lawn and take the grass/hedge trimmings away. Cleverly* he couldn't be arsed going to see the job first, so we told the bloke £50. It took 6 (six!) hours to do and I ended up doing three trips in the car plus had to pay half for a new hedge trimmer I managed to break, and I ended up with £20! The bloke asked how much it was going to be but I said because we quoted £50 then £50 it would be. He must have though all his Christmases had come at once.

[Pillock]

lick you for ages then piss on your tyres.

 

Reminds me of a girl I used to know.

[bub2006]

It's definitely not auto failure but it's definitely developed a misfire at idle now too. Orl voxalls etc. Love the car though so I won't be defeated. Shame I'm absolutely broke and can't even afford new plugs. A silly bitch has let me down on buying the xsara too even though I keep dropping price.

[JohnDeere]

Trying to buy a sodding trailer on eBay. Half of them are "VAT to be added to final price" which is against eBay T&Cs. Found a near-perfect one last night nearby, but the f**ktard seller in his one-word messages will only accept a best offer £20 under his asking price, and then wants cash (I offered bank transfer). I was tempted to pay the full price through Paypal which would have left him much worse off on the deal.

 

So if anyone knows of a decent OMG-Ifor-tax LM105G ideally with mesh sides, do let me know. Ideally newer, as there seems to be no price difference between a 2-year-old and 15-year-old one.

[michael1703]

whats all this obsession with "pulled pork" ?

 

it looks and tastes disgusting

 

another american thing weve inherited?

[anonymous user]

whats all this obsession with "pulled pork" ?

 

it looks and tastes disgusting

 

another american thing weve inherited

It also sounds disgusting, I initially thought it was yet another euphimism for a certain solo sexual practice

[Slappy]

It became the hipster meat of choice once everyone at festivals started getting bored of hog roast.

 

Plus it's bloody cheap to make as it tends to be quite a fatty shoulder joint, so lots of £££ for the retailer.

[richardmorris]

Woman in a rover zr 25 ( is that the little one?) tried to overtake the 2cv yesterday at the lights and pulled across in front and then proceeded to do 40 mph in the 60 limit. And then got most put out when I overtook.

 

Then on the way to burnham carnival the lights on the a4- first in the queue at the lights waiting for the filter arrow to turn right, and they didn't. Just went from general green to Amber and red, no green filter. So the car behind blasts their horn. Well it's not my fault dear, I didn't know it wasn't going to change did I?

[Pillock]

Pulled pork can be any old lump of crap meat, because it's cooked for hours and then torn apart it doesn't matter if it's arsehole, nipples or forehead. All looks the same once it's pulled.

 

Quite like the taste actually, and I'm all up for zero waste.

[Slappy]

Sunday driving did my head in today...

 

1st up was a female driver who flew out of what is quite a blind, due to giant Rhododendron or something roundabout junction in Chichester right into my path. Anchors on, horn lent on.

 

Next was a dozy Pickarsehole driver who finally confirmed to me that if you drive the wrong way into a car park, you WILL burst your tyres on those 1 way spike things (actually, that's more of a grin )

 

And finally, the dozy mare who opened her door into my drivers door whilst I was sat there and didn't even acknowledge what she'd done. Scampered off whilst I simmered down and counted to 10. Opening mine into hers didn't happen, because I like my car

[purplebargeken]

I'm bored and very tired, almost fell asleep many times today. Bleh!

[M'coli]

Sunday driving did my head in today...

 

1st up was a female driver who flew out of what is quite a blind, due to giant Rhododendron or something roundabout junction in Chichester right into my path. Anchors on, horn lent on.

 

Next was a dozy Pickarsehole driver who finally confirmed to me that if you drive the wrong way into a car park, you WILL burst your tyres on those 1 way spike things (actually, that's more of a grin )

 

And finally, the dozy mare who opened her door into my drivers door whilst I was sat there and didn't even acknowledge what she'd done. Scampered off whilst I simmered down and counted to 10. Opening mine into hers didn't happen, because I like my car

Pint of milk over the windscreen and draining into the scuttle area should sort that last one...

[dollywobbler]

Forget the modern cartoon, there's a porn version with Bobbi Starr as Velma...

I misread that as Freddie Starr. My brain is scarred for life.

[fred]

Hurrsah the fucking tennis has finished

Just got the fucking cricket now  ................ Cock

[oldcars]

Missed out on some bullet door mirrors for the Rover on Ebay today, so Ebay are sending me alternatives to bid on. That's a good idea I thought....

 

Except I don't own a 2009 Land Rover Discovery, or need new mirrors for a 2009 Discovery !!!

 

Fuckin Tits!

I know what you mean. Few years back i ordered wipers for the Shuma. Now i get bombarded with emails saying you might like wipers for a Ce'ed, Rio, Magentis, Sedonky or whatever.

[Bren]

Masking tape.

 

What is the bastard point? It does'nt mask anything - the paint just bleeds through.

 

Then again decorating professionals dont go to b&m or Wilko's for their stuff.

[fordperv]

Fucking insurance brokers, as you all know I had a small bump last month, to cut a long story short, Lancaster insurance hadn't added a previous claim to this policy even though it had been disclosed, weirdly it is on my other policy with them, I get told Friday that I would have to pay their administration cost to which it was queried that why should it be paid when it was actually their fault, today they tell me that the cash is for the extra the policy would have cost to set up, the slimy bastards try to fuck you every which way, it's not the amount that's annoyed me it's the fact that companies like this think it's ok to do this shit to customers, oh well that's 3 policies they won't get at renewal time, cunts

[darkfour]

Tenuous motoring grump, was out working in the garage yesterday evening and got bitten by a mosquito. Nothing unusual there except that I appear to have had an allergic reaction to it and my hand has swollen up and it itches like an itchy thing.