Shitting in the shallow end. *Arse friends Electric*

[Jim Bell]

God bless Bucketeer/Mr Fluffy Balls Logistics Services PLC who chased the black dog through the night and did the whole round trip with almost no notice. 

Word from the driver suggested "it looks horrible, but drives like a new car". 

Sounds good to me! Aim it north and engage warp drive. 

Is this the whole engine??

 

 

 

Smoll engine 4 smoll car. 

 

Quick sunbathe then set off. 

 

 

 

 

 

Setting off. 

 

[Jim Bell]

The collection/delivery team toiled through the night but due to a catnap, didn't have time for as much as a cup of tea or a piss at the turn around point. 

After 350 miles at the wheel, I took the right hand seat to get Bucketeer to the rail station. 

He's right. It drives like a new car!

 

Made it to the station in record time, before the sun came up but sadly 2 hours after bucketeers train left. 

 

 

[Jim Bell]

So what is it?

Well, it's a Blue Meanie. 

 

Or

 

 

 

^ Depending on how cool your childhood was. 

 

 

It's a Skoda Fabia 1.2 HTP. With 3 cylinders. 

 

The HTP stand for......................... No wait sit down. 

Ok it stands for HIGH TORQUE PERFORMANCE. 

I'm glad you sat down. I wouldn't want you falling over from shock. 

It has 64 hp. 

 

 

 

 

Not 164. Just 64. 

 

 

 

[Jim Bell]

It had (yes, HAD) the worst wheel trims. That's classic Skoda Fabia. 

 

 

 

With, or without?

 

 

 

[skattrd]

I'm wondering why you decided to keep this over the Yaris … I'm guessing this is cheaper to run/tax/insure.

[Jim Bell]

Now let's look at it in detail and at length. 

 

Magnificent coachline. 

 

 

Mirror on a mirror. Sexy. 

 

There is ONE grab handle. One.  For the passenger only. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And NO SUNROOF. BECAUSE SUNROOFS ARE LAME. 

 

 

 

 

Headroom motherfuckers. 

 

[Jim Bell]

7 minutes ago, skattrd said:

I'm wondering why you decided to keep this over the Yaris … I'm guessing this is cheaper to run/tax/insure.

Yea on all three, also far more mpgs. 

I would say the real reason is that the last car I bought/won is always the most exciting car.  This feeling won't last of course, but it keeps the world turning. If the Yaris didn't have a sunroof it would be a different tale. It's a sad bastard that ranks car on headroom rather than handling, but the shoe fits. 

[Jim Bell]

More photos? 

Oh ok. 

 

Laquer peels. 

 

 

Pez shot. (Traditional)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

New car. 

 

 

Is that a record for number of blanks?!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Jim Bell]

Free Redex!

 

 

 

[Jim Bell]

So what's it like?

 

Well, it's slow, it doesn't really handle and it looks horrible. 

All negatives aside, it's a hell of an appliance. It rides very well, is supremely comfortable, spacious and genuinely feels like it's a new car (to me anyway). 

It's quiet enough, though the 3 cylinder thrums it's lungs out when you encourage it on. 

It's (almost) as BASE as it gets. It has a stereo, PSYCHOTIC electric front windows and a heated rear screen. That's it. 

 

 

Negatives: one or both of the electronic window switches and/or regulators are haunted. Opening a window doesn't necessarily mean it'll close. Fiddling with the switches can make both windows dance up and down long after you let go of the switches, so that's something I can improve. 

I spent a day cleaning it, but it still needs more. 

 

 

 

slime and lichen!

[Jim Bell]

Massive positives are it just feels so tight, if uninspired. Came with pretty much full service history, stamped to 53k and receipts from there, and has pretty low miles!

If I was advising someone to buy a car to commute, this would be the car. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So what do you pay for an ugly low mileage commuter car with pretty much a FSH that feels like new?

Well I found 2p when I was cleaning it, so it cost £17.98. 

Thats reason enough to keep it for now. 

[Jim Bell]

Oh, and a million thanks for @dozeydustman and @Bucketeer for making it happen. I'm over the moon with it. 2 great great dudes. 

Home again. 

[GeordieInExile]

Not bASe enough for my liking, what with the fancy Dan trims and 'leccy windows. Sure the properly povvo spec ones had keep-fit windows all round.

[somewhatfoolish]

55 minutes ago, Jim Bell said:

 

With, or without?

 

Without, because lightweight and therefore fast.

[Jim Bell]

4 minutes ago, GeordieInExile said:

Sure the properly povvo spec ones had keep-fit windows all round.

I wish this one did have!

[GeordieInExile]

Less to go wrong, innit.

If you were so inclined you could probably convert them... at least the mirrors are manual, eh.

[AndyW201]

Good shiteing friend! Always liked Skodas of this era, I've even still got a long dormant one at the back of my driveway.

Early Fabia Classics definitely had keep fit windows all round., even my Octavia Classic on an 05 plate did!

Love the colour,  my Octavia Classic was the same shade, loved that car. But going from a 1.6  8v to a 1.8 20v turbo VRS took some adjusting...

Good call on frisbeeing the trimz o' shame, the bare steelies on these don't look too bad.

 

[Schaefft]

That interior is concentrated drabness, excellent purchase, especially for the price of a set of wiper blades. Replacing yours surely will double the value!

[Jim Bell]

24 minutes ago, AndyW201 said:

 

Good call on frisbeeing the trimz o' shame, the bare steelies on these don't look too bad.

 

I'm on the lookout for some bland OEM grey trims, but bare steels is certainly a strong 2nd place. 

[Jim Bell]

26 minutes ago, Schaefft said:

That interior is concentrated drabness, excellent purchase, especially for the price of a set of wiper blades. Replacing yours surely will double the value!

I think filling it with petrol increased the value by 500%. Then I bought some OEM rubber mats to knock it up to 600%. If I replaced the wiper blades it'd be pushing 700%

[DoctorRetro]

Cracking result. 

I had a 3 pot 1.2 Ibiza as a company car, same engine. I can attest to how woeful it is, power wise. 

Put it this way, my Kelisa only has 10 less horsepower, but probably weighs about half what the Fabia/Ibiza does. 

Make sure you get a good run up for motorway hills!

That having been said, they are willing little engines, and you can drive almost everywhere flat out. Take it easy though, and high 50s are achievable in mpgs. 

[paulplom]

12 hours ago, Jim Bell said:

The collection/delivery team toiled through the night but due to a catnap, didn't have time for as much as a cup of tea or a piss at the turn around point. 

After 350 miles at the wheel, I took the right hand seat to get Bucketeer to the rail station. 

He's right. It drives like a new car!

 

Made it to the station in record time, before the sun came up but sadly 2 hours after bucketeers train left. 

 

 

That's the exact spot I picked Northernmonkey up in the van a couple of weeks back. He commented he'd thought the van was being robbed but it was just me having a piss in a bucket in the back.

[LoftyvRS]

What you have there Jim is the Fabia with the optional factory "Plus Pack". This gave you electric front windows and remote locking (with a two button key none the less!). The electric window issues you have suffered will more than likely be caused by the drivers electric window motor. The circuit board on them suffer intermittent faults which affects both windows, it wont be the switches or the wiring, but will be the motor. Be careful buying used motors off eBay as there are about 6 different types, and the one you need will have a particular suffix on the part number.

When these were launched to the dealer network I joked to the bloke who was teaching us dealer chumps that HTP stood for "has three pistons" and got told to hold the wise cracks, typical motor trade faceless trainer bell end!

[Jim Bell]

37 minutes ago, LoftyvRS said:

What you have there Jim is the Fabia with the optional factory "Plus Pack". This gave you electric front windows and remote locking (with a two button key none the less!). The electric window issues you have suffered will more than likely be caused by the drivers electric window motor. The circuit board on them suffer intermittent faults which affects both windows, it wont be the switches or the wiring, but will be the motor. Be careful buying used motors off eBay as there are about 6 different types, and the one you need will have a particular suffix on the part number.

When these were launched to the dealer network I joked to the bloke who was teaching us dealer chumps that HTP stood for "has three pistons" and got told to hold the wise cracks, typical motor trade faceless trainer bell end!

Well that's interesting news. Glad I haven't purchased switches then. 

Do the motors and regulators come on a big metal panel affair on these? They seem cheap enough on eBay, but if there's loads of types, I'll have to have a look before purchasing. 

[LoftyvRS]

8 minutes ago, Jim Bell said:

Well that's interesting news. Glad I haven't purchased switches then. 

Do the motors and regulators come on a big metal panel affair on these? They seem cheap enough on eBay, but if there's loads of types, I'll have to have a look before purchasing. 

The regulators are indeed the entire size of the door panel, and are classed pretty much as consumable items like most VAG stuff. The regulators can be had for circa £30 new.

The motors affix to the regulator by way of a geared spline type affair and the motors are bolted to the outer part of the carrier/regulator and can be changed easy enough without disturbing the carrier/regulator.

The other most common Fabia fault is, leaky rear doors, this can be rectified by self tapping the carrier/regulator to the door across the lower edge then sealing the joint with plumbers gold mastic. Leaky rear doors will make the rear footwells wet, causing steaming up issues etc.

Other than that they're pretty robust in a non exciting kinda way. The austere interior was typical of the Czech approach back in the day, but they are well built and strong. 

 

 

[Lacquer Peel]

Czech out the Fabia Junior. Austere. It doesn't even have a glovebox lid.

 

I had a Fabia SDI a while ago, it was a bit dour to drive but reasonably comfy and good for long distances.

 

 

 

 

[Jim Bell]

8 minutes ago, Lacquer Peel said:

Czech out the Fabia Junior. Austere. It doesn't even have a glovebox lid.

 

I had a Fabia SDI a while ago, it was a bit dour to drive but reasonably comfy and good for long distances.

 

 

 

 

That looks mega. If this one had manual front windows it would be ideal. Wonder how difficult converting it would be. 

[Supernaut]

2 hours ago, Jim Bell said:

That looks mega. If this one had manual front windows it would be ideal. Wonder how difficult converting it would be. 

1. Get hold of a set of regulators, handles, and door cards (or make holes in the existing ones)

2. ????

3. Profit

 

 

A while ago I did think about the 1.9TDi ones of these, as they can apparently be mapped to 130hp, the same as the VRS, but in a boring body style. A beige estate with that engine (and remap) would be especially appealing / appalling.

[loserone]

Would probably be fun with an AUQ in too, but then you'd want it to go around corners too, no?

[Jim Bell]

15 minutes ago, loserone said:

Would probably be fun with an AUQ in too, but then you'd want it to go around corners too, no?

It's alright the way it is. It's not a performance car, which is alright by me. I'd have a VRS like, but there's no point trying to make this into anything more than a pootler.