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What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

outlaw118

By outlaw118
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Mr Lobster Rank: Lancia Gamma

Mr Lobster

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Not entirely a grin but its certainly a pretty impressive thing to see, ferry 'Ostend Spirit' being beached in Turkey -

 

oman5 Rank: Renault 16

oman5

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post-5001-0-33559100-1390589196_thumb.jpg   This week I have been mostly reading "rivethead" by Ben hamper. A unique perspective of working in a GM assembly plant in the late '70s/early '80s. It's hilarious. sample quote:

 

the management at the Truck Plant decided what the Quality concept really needed was a mascot. Conceived in a moment of sheer visionary enlightenment, the paln was to dress up the mascot as a large cat. Fittingly, this rat-in-cat's clothing was to be called the Quality Cat. Somewhere along the line, an even more brilliant mind upstairs decided that quality cat was sort of a dull title. Therefore, a contest was organized in an attempt to give the Quality Cat a more vital name. Hundreds of crafty welders, screw jockeys and assorted shoprats immediately began clunking their heads in an effort to christen the hallowed cat. Management announce that they would reward the most creative of these entries with a week's use of a company truck. Hot damn! The eventual winner of the contest was a worker who stumbled upon the inspired moniker Howie Makem. Sadly, my intriguing entry, Wanda Kwit, finished way the hell down the list somewhere right between Roger's Pussy and Tuna Meowt. 

Howie Makem was to become the messianic embodiment of the Company's new Quality drive. A livin', breathin' propaganda vessel assigned to spur on the troops. Go ahead and laugh, I know I did. Just for a moment, imagine the probing skull session that took place in some high-level think tank the day Howie was first brought to mention.

"You know, slogans on coffee cups just ain't gettin' it, Bill."

" You're absolutely right, Ted. We need something more dynamic. More upbeat."

"Hey, why don't we give the men their own kitty cat!"

"Kitty cat? Hmmm, I like it! A large kitty cat! Ted, you're a genius!"

Howie Makem stood five feet nine. He had light brown fur, long synthetic whiskers and a head the size of a Datsun. He wore a long red cape emblazoned with the letter Q for Quality. A very magical cat, Howie walked everywhere on his hind paws. Cruelly, Howie was not entrusted with a dick.

Howie would make the rounds poking his floppy whiskers in and out of each department. A "Howie sighting" was always cause for great fanfare. The workers would scream and holler and jump up and down on their workbenches whenever Howie drifted by. Howie Makem may have begun as just another Company ploy to prod the tired legions, but most of us ran with the joke and soon Howie evolved into a crazy phenomenon. 

  • RedSparrow, warren t claim and Doctormop
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dollywobbler Rank: Matra Rancho towing a Tagora

dollywobbler

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I still haven't read that book, even though Clarkson raved about it (including the stupid quality cat) decades ago.

Junkman Rank: Matra Rancho towing a Tagora

Junkman

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attachicon.gifrivet.jpg   This week I have been mostly reading "rivethead" by Ben hamper. A unique perspective of working in a GM assembly plant in the late '70s/early '80s. It's hilarious. sample quote:

 

the management at the Truck Plant decided what the Quality concept really needed was a mascot. Conceived in a moment of sheer visionary enlightenment, the paln was to dress up the mascot as a large cat.

 

I have read the book, and this section reminded me of the Sim'Cat:

 

simcat114c0e11.jpg

 

Anyone else here giffer enough to remember it?

MrDuke Rank: Renault 16

MrDuke

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Last night I dreamt that I was playing the demo for a new Forza game. One of the unlockable cars was a race-tuned Samara hatchback - well, I say race-tuned, it appreared to have a boggo 1.3 engine with a gigantic, laggy turbo bolted on. It was painfully slow up to 4k, then suddenly took off and obliterated all the BMWs and Imprezas I was racing against. Unfortunately, it didn't really like corners much.

I'd love to believe that somewhere, someone has actually built this, and the sheer awesomeness of it caused an astral projection into my sleeping subconscious.

JohnDeere Rank: BL Wedge

JohnDeere

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I remember that ferry (then Pride of Calais) when it was brand new. Sad to see an E-reg ferry headed to such an early grave.

Ghosty Rank: Talbot Tagora

Ghosty

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I liked a lot of those not-BL things, they were great. But the Morris Minor one?

 

Dear lord!

Mr Lobster Rank: Lancia Gamma

Mr Lobster

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I remember that ferry (then Pride of Calais) when it was brand new. Sad to see an E-reg ferry headed to such an early grave.

 

Me too. I've been on that more than I can remember as I always somehow ended up on it rather than any other. Shame to see it scrapped so young but with it being relatively specialised and not that  easy to rebuild for use elsewhere plus the traditional market for second hand ferries being so depressed I suppose it was inevitable.

Station Rank: Isuzu Florian

Station

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Finally got the Saabastra running - there was a wad of tissue jamming the throttle butterfly valve in the inlet (don't ask)

Any other crazy wacky surprises from this car I wonder?

fordperv Rank: Lancia Gamma

fordperv

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ive just been to my local tesco and the heavens opened up quite heavily with hale, the mouth breathers were huddling at the door like a load of apes, mrs fordperv looked at me said "bloody hell its only hale anyone would think its the waiting room for jeremy kyle show"

Junkman Rank: Matra Rancho towing a Tagora

Junkman

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Priced from £55-£100k with beiges and browns on the colour chart, not just greys and silvers.

 

EFA

Cavcraft Rank: Matra Rancho towing a Tagora

Cavcraft

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Derby County FC: needed them to score today for our football back to come home and they . Ker_fucking_ching, C U L8R bookies!

dugong Rank: Renault 16

dugong

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Finally got the Saabastra running - there was a wad of tissue jamming the throttle butterfly valve in the inlet (don't ask)

Any other crazy wacky surprises from this car I wonder?

 

 

Corners?

overrun Rank: Renault 16

overrun

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I remember that ferry (then Pride of Calais) when it was brand new. Sad to see an E-reg ferry headed to such an early grave.

I have a model of it. Unopened, cos it was shite.

 

Nowt's as sad as seeing the Happy Giant/Jahre Viking etc being broken up.

  • warren t claim and Junkman
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RedSparrow Rank: Renault 16

RedSparrow

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I remember that ferry (then Pride of Calais) when it was brand new. Sad to see an E-reg ferry headed to such an early grave.

 

It was the Pride of Calais? I went on that quite a few times back when you could get cheap booze and fags over there. :-(

Mr Lobster Rank: Lancia Gamma

Mr Lobster

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It was yes. Finished with P&O about twelve months ago then chartered to Transeuropa ferries who promptly went bust owing a bus load of money. With no sale on the horizon and costing something like £50k per week whilst laid up off it went for scrap.

 

Pity.

  • RedSparrow and Junkman
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Pillock Rank: Matra Rancho towing a Tagora

Pillock

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It was probably a prototype of an unreleased title. There are some serious collectors in the US and Japan.

 

It was a game handed out to finalists of a competition held by Nintendo whilst they toured around the US. You had to beat three games in an allotted time, the carts were used in the competition and then the finalists could keep them. There were 110 or something, 90 are known to survive. A number have been sold recently for over $10,000

 

That one has lost the hand-numbered label, but retains the DIP switches so it's genuine.

cobblers Rank: Isuzu Florian

cobblers

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Tax man owes me £200, and I've just about sold a couple hundred quids of things on gumtree (while winding up "best price" and "would you take £50 less because I have to drive  25 miles" people) plus my mate who's a cracking upholster is back visiting home after emigrating to canadaland. All this means I should be able to buy the good material and get a really nice job done on the van interior rather than having to settle for the cheap stuff with the brain donor of a trimmer I was going to have to use. Plus it's fuppin newark autojumble tomorrow so I can go there and stock up on blue roll and random bits of exhaust pipe which seems to be what I buy every time I go

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