What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[ashmicro]

. In the vein of "If you can't fix it with a hammer, you have an electrical problem"

[Lufthansa-Terminal]

[Albert Ross]

My youngest Stepson is home from Afghanistan. Currently en route from his barracks. I expect to see him tomorrow night, and much drinkage will commence.

[Lufthansa-Terminal]

[eddyramrod]

The face of the physiotherapist this morning at Paphos General. It's nearly two weeks since Mrs was flung out, and I practically had to lift her into her wheelchair; I was still hand-feeding her, generally doing everything. Today I wheeled her into the physio department, the therapist and I helped her up on the bed, and she then had to run through a range of exercises. Physio's face was a picture. I think she was expecting us to be coming back twice a week until Easter, instead she was happy to say come back in two weeks, and then maybe once more. Bloody hell this is good stuff.

[Pete-M]

 

This. I really must use it more often.

[Felly Magic]

The face of the physiotherapist this morning at Paphos General. It's nearly two weeks since Mrs was flung out, and I practically had to lift her into her wheelchair; I was still hand-feeding her, generally doing everything. Today I wheeled her into the physio department, the therapist and I helped her up on the bed, and she then had to run through a range of exercises. Physio's face was a picture. I think she was expecting us to be coming back twice a week until Easter, instead she was happy to say come back in two weeks, and then maybe once more. Bloody hell this is good stuff.

 

Great stuff mate.

[Cavcraft]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=364dzVsB ... r_embedded

[Felly Magic]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=364dzVsBs2o&feature=player_embedded

 

Good old Photon from Kent. Madder than a box of frogs. I'm one of his thousands of subscribers. His latest 'TV Conkers' vid is bonkers.... 'I aint avin it! Where my ammah?'

[ashmicro]

http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A ... drK40Ig2kw

 

Kate (car 73) racing in the Touring Cars championship on GRID. GR32 takedown of car 25 at turn 2. You can have a 320 or Shiters choice, a Lacetti.

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=364dzVsBs2o&feature=player_embedded

 

Good old Photon from Kent. Madder than a box of frogs. I'm one of his thousands of subscribers. His latest 'TV Conkers' vid is bonkers.... 'I aint avin it! Where my ammah?'

 

I couldn't believe how long those TVs lasted!

[cort16]

Cav..I mean carcraft have had their arses felt.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-15655665

[Cavcraft]

Cav..I mean carcraft have had their arses felt.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-15655665

 

Aside from some poor mugs being turned over by that shower, it's good news that CrapRaft have had their collars felt.

[warren t claim]

I feel a great sense of achievement that my invention of the CAVCRAFT brand has entered the shiters lexicon.

[Cavcraft]

I went to West Kirby today and nobody stole my car

[autofive]

I went to West Kirby today and nobody stole my car

 

 

go back in the school holidays and when jobclub is only half-day

[Craig the Princess]

Receiving a box in the post addressed Craig the Princess full of Rover R8 bits

 

Thanks KruJoe.

[autofive]

shamefully nicked from another forum (GRP based cars forum )

 

War made easy

 

World war 1 the simple view, as a pub fight:

 

Germany, Austria and Italy are stood together in the middle of the pub, when Serbia bumps into Austria, and spills Austria's pint. Austria demands Serbia buy it a complete new suit, because there are splashes on its trouser leg.

 

Germany expresses its support for Austria's point of view Britain recommends that everyone calm down a bit. Serbia points out that it can't afford a whole suit, but offers to pay for cleaning Austria's trousers.

 

Russia and Serbia look at Austria. Austria asks Serbia who it's looking at. Russia suggests that Austria should leave its little brother alone. Austria inquires as to whose army will assist Russia in compelling it to do so. Germany appeals to Britain that France has been looking at it, and that this is sufficiently out of order that Britain should not intervene.

 

Britain replies that France can look at who it wants to, that Britain is looking at Germany too, and what is Germany going to do about it? Germany tells Russia to stop looking at Austria, or Germany will render Russia incapable of such action. Britain and France ask Germany whether it's looking at Belgium.

 

Turkey and Germany go off into a corner and whisper. When they come back, Turkey makes a show of not looking at anyone. Germany rolls up its sleeves, looks at France, and punches Belgium.

 

France and Britain punch Germany. Austria punches Russia. Germany punches Britain and France with one hand and Russia with the other. Russia throws a punch at Germany, but misses and nearly falls over. Japan calls over from the other side of the room that it's on Britain's side, but stays there.

 

Italy surprises everyone by punching Austria. Australia punches Turkey, and gets punched back. There are no hard feelings, because Britain made Australia do it.

 

France gets thrown through a plate glass window, but gets back up and carries on fighting. Russia gets thrown through another one, gets knocked out, suffers brain damage, and wakes up with a complete personality change. Italy throws a punch at Austria and misses, but Austria falls over anyway. Italy raises both fists in the air and runs round the room chanting.

 

America waits till Germany is about to fall over from sustained punching from Britain and France, then walks over and smashes it with a barstool, then pretends it won the fight all by itself. By now all the chairs are broken, and the big mirror over the bar is shattered. Britain, France and America agree that Germany threw the first punch, so the whole thing is Germany's fault . While Germany is still unconscious, they go through its pockets, steal its wallet, and buy drinks for all their friends.

 

WWII part 1

 

After being out cold Germany wakes up, look in bits of the broken mirror and thinks the moustache they've grown looks good.

 

Italy then tells Germany that Britain, France and America nicked Germany's money.

 

Poland and Czechoslovakia then step into the pub for a quite pint. Germany asks Austria if it would like to hold Poland's arms whilst they punch Czechoslovakia in the nuts and steal their house keys.

 

Britain tries to calm everything down again but France are so pissed by now they are looking for a fight. Belgium has rung his mates Holland and Norway but they are busy looking for Switzerland who's done a bunk with the money they were going to put on the 3:30 at Newmarket.

 

Denmark then calls eveyone's mum a slag.

 

At this point Japan decides to donkey punch America...

 

 

that made me grin, so i copied and pasted it

[Cavcraft]

/\

 

 

Brilliant!

[eddyramrod]

Postman's just been, and left a parcel behind my gate (which he never opens, so therefore he dropped it over). I thought it was a pair of Vanguards Granada police cars that I bought on ebay and should arrive any day now, but no... better than that! 14 purple-wrapped Yorkie bars and a handful of Autoshite stickers, courtesy of The Moog of this parish. Well done sir, and many thanks. That's what I call kindness.

[ashmicro]

A5, that is superb!

[ashmicro]

Just seen Princess Anne. Even more impressive were the 672 PSNI motorbikes and what appeared to be a morning's worth of production from Land Rover. They weren't hanging about!

[ashmicro]

Was she driving a Reliant Scimitar?

 

No, she was in the back of an Range Rover, although the first thought that came to my mind was "Scimitar!". Too much time thinking about old cars does that to a person

[Negative Creep]

Round of layoffs at work today. After a rather nervous few hours spent preparing for Pot Noodles and Jeremy Kyle turns out I'm not amongst them

[tonedepear]

^ good news NC. Hope there's not further rounds and you can relax a bit.

 

This place makes me grin. I know I'm dead new and rarely have owt of value to contribute and I've not been on here 5 years like everyone else but despite all the winging and sniping and "OMG everyone's leaving" chatter, the standard of knowledge/banter/sharpness is head and shoulders above anywhere else I know, and without sounding too ghey it feels like a real spiritual home to me (despite me being presently shiteless).

Popping over to Lee's SAAB Coffee Bar last night made me realise how sharp this place is, and I used to live on there.

 

So yeah, you guys make me grin.

[myglaren]

^ What he said!

[Mr H Sceptre]

^ good news NC. Hope there's not further rounds and you can relax a bit.

 

This place makes me grin. I know I'm dead new and rarely have owt of value to contribute and I've not been on here 5 years like everyone else but despite all the winging and sniping and "OMG everyone's leaving" chatter, the standard of knowledge/banter/sharpness is head and shoulders above anywhere else I know, and without sounding too ghey it feels like a real spiritual home to me (despite me being presently shiteless).

Popping over to Lee's SAAB Coffee Bar last night made me realise how sharp this place is, and I used to live on there.

 

So yeah, you guys make me grin.

 

 

[Craig the Princess]

^ good news NC. Hope there's not further rounds and you can relax a bit.

 

This place makes me grin. I know I'm dead new and rarely have owt of value to contribute and I've not been on here 5 years like everyone else but despite all the winging and sniping and "OMG everyone's leaving" chatter, the standard of knowledge/banter/sharpness is head and shoulders above anywhere else I know, and without sounding too ghey it feels like a real spiritual home to me (despite me being presently shiteless).

Popping over to Lee's SAAB Coffee Bar last night made me realise how sharp this place is, and I used to live on there.

 

So yeah, you guys make me grin.

 

/THIS\

[kinkersaab]

^ good news NC. Hope there's not further rounds and you can relax a bit.

 

This place makes me grin. I know I'm dead new and rarely have owt of value to contribute and I've not been on here 5 years like everyone else but despite all the winging and sniping and "OMG everyone's leaving" chatter, the standard of knowledge/banter/sharpness is head and shoulders above anywhere else I know, and without sounding too ghey it feels like a real spiritual home to me (despite me being presently shiteless).

Popping over to Lee's SAAB Coffee Bar last night made me realise how sharp this place is, and I used to live on there.

 

So yeah, you guys make me grin.

 

 

X2 I love it here. like Tone. my home was uksaabs, im still a regular, and attend curry nights etc and have made some fantastic mates and acquaintances there, but the banter level is now lacking, especially after hanging around on here.;

[Pete-M]