What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[Cavcraft]

  tontops said:

For all the grumpy old men who still believe in spelling and grammar:

 

http://www.someecards.com/2011/04/06/the-best-obnoxious-responses-to-misspellings-on-facebook

 

 

 

Brilliant.

[Angrydicky]

Tontops, that's great

 

I particularly like this one.

 

[Pete-M]

GROFFLECOPTER.

[Station]

 

Haha!

[trigger]

I was LOL at this one earlier.

 

[Guest]

LOL @ AMERIKANS DEY R WEL FUNNEH

[scaryoldcortina]

A random conversation last night made me grin.

 

I collected a car, it was getting late and I couldn't be arsed unloading or cooking so I went to the pizza shop and took the truck home. The pizza place is down a side street, there is a recovery garage opposite it. I squeezed the truck past the citroen C4 that was parked across their door and pulled up in front of it.

 

As I walked to the door of the shop, a woman came out and asked if I needed her to move her car, assuming I was there for the garage, I said it was ok, I'm here for food....

 

So while I waited for my pizzas we started to talk, her telling me what a godawful thing the citroen is and how many times it's blown up/stranded them/put a light on and gone into limp mode in the middle lane of the M1 etc, I mostly nodded and thought about how I know someone else with similar complaints about a similar car. Then she says that she has another car, that she would much rather be using instead. She has a Volvo 480ES in the garage, but all the garage quotes she gets to sort the brakes out are huge. So I gave her my number.

 

Then my pizzas were ready, so I made my excuses and left.

[trigger]

Mick walks into Paddy's barn and catches him dancing naked and wa*king in front of a tractor. Mick says 'Fooking hell Paddy, what ya doing'. Paddy says, well me and Mary haven't been getting on in the bedroom lately, and the therapist recommended I do something sexy to attractor.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I'll get me coat...

[cms206]

My mate's just spent a quite exhorbitant amount repairing on a really rather battered burgandy V-reg Kia Mentor after it failed it's MOT...

 

... I've given him an AS sticker, as although he's not here, he quite clearly should be.

[Alexg]

  tontops said:

For all the grumpy old men who still believe in spelling and grammar:

 

http://www.someecards.com/2011/04/06/the-best-obnoxious-responses-to-misspellings-on-facebook

 

 

 

 

 

[M'coli]

From the same site:

And

[revolting peasant]

[Negative Creep]

[scaryoldcortina]

I'm playing a little game with my missus - I've come home in a different car, I'm going to wait and see how long it takes her to notice that my grey H reg Sierra Sapphire has turned into a grey H reg Sierra hatchback (with alloys). Then I'm going to insist it is the same car and swap them back.

[shite_meister]

  scaryoldcortina said:

I'm playing a little game with my missus - I've come home in a different car, I'm going to wait and see how long it takes her to notice that my grey H reg Sierra Sapphire has turned into a grey H reg Sierra hatchback (with alloys). Then I'm going to insist it is the same car and swap them back.

 

Been watching old episodes of Coronation St where that bloke tries to convince Audrey that she's going nuts?

 

(no I don't watch it/them)

[scaryoldcortina]

No, I didn't even know it had been used as a plot. I don't watch Corrie either.

 

TBH, there isn't much chance she will notice at all, it took weeks for her to realize that my xr4i had turned into a mk3 granada despite being driven around in it. I thought that the extra doors would have given it away but no, she thought I'd changed the seats and fixed the noisy exhaust.

[mattblack]

Seeing a genuinely shabby, not RATLUK YO!, 60's Beetle this morning made me grin.

[Timewaster]

This makes me grin:

 

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-13190124

 

I Hate Tesco!

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

I quite like the idea that Tesco are failing in the US because they're being too British (by having fruit in the shop, apparently). I avoid Asda because I can't bring myself to go in a building with "Part of the WAL★MART family" written on it.

 

*shudder*

[Guest Leonard Hatred]

I think they've ditched that WAL★MART business, at least at the Elgin store.

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

So they have - It's vanished from their website at least. It's quite prominent on my nearest ASDA as it's branded "Asda WalMart Supercentre".

[scaryoldcortina]

Yeah, our ASDA has dropped the "walmart" thing on the sign too.

 

Just been there actually, and to vote. Mrs S noticed that the car is clean and smells nice, but didn't notice it isn't the same car....

 

 

edit for typos

[fiatdaft]

spammer.

[ashmicro]

  Negative Creep said:

 

 

That made me LOL like a loony! HAHAHAHHA! Oh fuck! PRICELESS!

[CreepingJesus]

Pretty sure the 'Wal-Mart' stuff has been quietly shuffled off, by Asda. It's still loud'n'proud in the staff areas (the ones I've seen anyway), and the noticeboards etc., round the depots, tho'.

Inside the Tesco system however, it's like 1984. In the staff news rag, and the rolling bulletin boards, there's much back slapping for the successes in SE Asia, and the promise of great things, when they go back into Western Europe. Never any mention of the American situation, or the dismal failure of the W Europe experience the first time around.

I don't like Tesco's business method either, but the work pays the bills, and I just have a good whinge sometimes instead. Shocking.

[revolting peasant]

[Guest]

  revolting peasant said:

Had a splendid evening in the company of autoshites resident sweary bastard Watanabe, including chinese grub and old school music tunes. Excelsior!

 

Indeed. Until I realised I'd missed the last Metrolink back to Sale by 35 minutes. I had to get the sweaty old 41 back to Station Road and it took forever and the driver smelt of chips.

 

Ergh.

 

Also:

 

 

Nice to see them finally. Especially when I bought them in October.

[ChinaTom]

Is that Walmart still in Milton Keynes? As much as I dislike the whole supermarket experience (although I quite like the self checkout facility and the ability to do it all at 03:00 that allows a complete weeks procurement without any interaction with another human being*), that place sold just about everything under the sun. Wifey spent nearly 3 hours in there and I had a nice kip in the car.

 

*the "item not recognized" thing is OK as the people that come and sort you out tend not to have any verbal capability anyway, and I can tolerate a few grunts.

[trigger]

A mate just sent me this link of Kings of Leon playing Reading back in 2009, It's amazing how these guys even got a recording contact after hearing his!

 

[BMC Dan]

Seeing a white and maroon AMC Pacer on slotmags and a hand painted blue and white J-plate Morris Oxford out on the roads, and two Mk3 Austin 1800's parked outside a house in Tring today. Photos to follow of the crabs soon.