Stupid car names

[bunglebus]

I've been thinking about some of the daft names manufacturers come up with for their cars (I'm of the opinion we ran out of car names in 1992 and had to start making up things like "Mondeo").

 

Here's a few, I'm sure you guys will find plenty more;

 

Citroen Cactus - also stupid for having a bar of Dairy Milk stuck to the sides;

 

 

Mazda Bongo Friendee;

 

 

Renault Wind (probably made more sense in France);

 

 

Just to prove it's not an entirely new phenomenon, the Nissan Cedric;

 

 

Here are Cedric's grandchildren, Adam and Zoé;

 

 

[bunglebus]

Oh dear, just found this - Mitsubishi Minica Lettuce;

 

[Supernaut]

Oh dear, just found this - Mitsubishi Minica Lettuce;

 

Those mirrors make it look a little bit like a snail, and snails eat lettuce!

 

See, I bet it was intentional.

[Liggle]

Anything that Ssangyong make

[Mr A Lawrence]

Datsun/Nissan fairlady is one.

 

Wrong name for a hairy chested sports car!!

[John F]

Chrysler LeBaron.

 

What le fuck?

 

EDIT: "LeBaron was founded in Bridgeport, Connecticut in 1920 by Raymond H. Dietrich and Thomas L. Hibbard. The company originally was called LeBaron, Carrossiers Inc., and served as design consultants. Dietrich and Hibbard were unknown outside of Brewster, so a clever new name - LeBaron, Carrossiers - was arrived at by the two partners using a list of French words that had the ring of prestige and could be easily pronounced through a telephone."

 

"Clever"? I'd have said "crass & tacky", personally.

[John F]

Datsun/Nissan fairlady is one.

 

Wrong name for a hairy chested sports car!!

 

Ditto the Nissan Skyline, it sounds like a van.

[HMC]

One of my faves- Honda HRV JOY MACHINE, uncomfortably close to the KDF ( strength through joy car)

 

Edit- the richest picking ground has to be the JDM, a lot of model designations from the 90s are either odd or just hilarious.

[HMC]

Notable mention to the PLEASURE WAGON of this parish obvs.

[John F]

Haha, I was just typing that one up...

 

To give it its full name: the Toyota Estima Lucida Charme Pleasure Wagon.

[HMC]

Isuzu mysterious utility wizard

 

Nissan homy super long

 

Mitsubishi mini active urban sandal

[mercrocker]

One of my faves- Honda HRV JOY MACHINE, uncomfortably close to the KDF ( strength through joy car)

 

Edit- the richest picking ground has to be the JDM, a lot of model designations from the 90s are either odd or just hilarious.

 

The stuff they sent here in the 1970s was just as risible....

 

Sunny

Cherry

Violet 

  

In not necessarily the right order, the name my Gran called me, that of a neighbour's pony and my mother's first name. 

 

Probably good that Dad never bought one. 

[MorrisItalSLX]

Ford Probe - Who wants a Ford shoved up their arse?

[bunglebus]

I've never understood the hate for "Probe", it makes me think of NASA, space exploration etc but I guess some of you have minds in the gutter 

 

Mind you, we used to Find Escort/Fiesta/Mini Mayfair hilarious as porn obsessed teenagers.

 

I have to mention the Peugeot Bipper and Renault Kangoo too. I think the French are in 2nd place to our oriental cousins when it come to mad car names.

[Cleon-Fonte]

Nissan Terrano.

 

[fatharris]

Citroen Nemo has to be in with a shout, as does the Mitsubishi Carisma, a car that had anything but.

 

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[Tamworthbay]

Citroen Nemo has to be in with a shout, as does the Mitsubishi Carisma, a car that had anything but.

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Beat me to it with the carisma, surely the most inappropriate name ever. The mr2 didn't go down in France due to what it sounds like in French (merde-shit).

 

Golf, polo crap names, golf instead of rabbit, more crap name.

[Bianconeri]

Pajero - always make me chuckle that folks drive around in a car that says "W*nk*r" on the tailgate.

[cort1977]

Personal favourite - the Isuzu Bighorn.   Fnarr, fnarr.

 

 

[AlabamaShrimp]

The Open Adam does sort of make sense and the Karl (Viva here) it's the total made up ones that I think are a bit strange like the Trajet or the ones that seem to be random numbers (Peugeot excepted).

[Bianconeri]

Yes, MR2 translates as 'shitty' hence just MR in French-speaking markets.

 

There was, anecdotally, almost a RR Silver Mist until they realised that Mist means manure to the Germans.

 

Nova means 'doesn't go' to the Spanish, hence Corsa.

 

Citroen BX DTR was TRD in markets that weren't English speaking,

 

As a teenager I had an unexplicable urge to add a T to any car displaying 'turbo'.

 

Kids locally crayonned an extra R and D onto the badge of a Captur.

[mk2_craig]

YUE LOONG FEELING. I want one by the way.

[Hendry]

VW Bora? - cos they were a complete fucking bore!

 

VW up!, any Citroen Picasso - i mean really, why Picasso? is it supposed to be ironic because Picasso was an artist whilst these things are anything but a work of art?, Hyundai Accent, Getz, Matrix, 

[Yoss]

You said Bongo Friendee in the first post. Should have saved that for later cos you ain't gonna top that!

[Timewaster]

There was an article in Alternative Car magazine (I think they only sold 3 copies and lasted as many issues) on the subject.

 

I remember a Mazda Friendee Bongo Brawny Birdwatcher.

 

Either Nissan or Mitsubishi did a Lettuce.

[PiperCub]

The High-and-Dry Pony (as in pony & trap?).

 

Nissan Cedric as per the OP. Not that funny unless you're an Aussie because Cedric is the Oz equivilent of what we call a Jessie. (A somewhat less than masculine gentleman!).

 

A Polish friend (now sadly deceased) told me once that Skoda in Polish means 'To damage (something/someone)'

 

 

As stated - JDM stuff is a rich source of hilarious names due to the Japanese having an obsession with putting anglophile words and phrases on their products to make them sound sophisticated/exotic even when they are at best, meaningless and confusing, at worst, endlessly funny &/or embarrassing! 

 

Often they have entire paragraphs of text plastered on the sides that, as Eric Morecome might have said - All the words are there - just not necessarily in the right order.

 

There's supposed to be a scooter called something like 'The Pantryboy Supreme'. 

[Zantimisfit]

Morris Isis probably doesn't work as well now as it did in the mid 50s

[Bianconeri]

Morris Isis probably doesn't work as well now as it did in the mid 50s

Isn't it the river through Cowley?

[PiperCub]

Morris Isis probably doesn't work as well now as it did in the mid 50s

 

In the same way after WW2 Swallow Sidecars who were known as SS, changed their name to Jaguar. 

[bunglebus]

The Ford Ka needs a mention too, it's meant to be pronounced "car" and mean spirit/soul IIRC - but even Ford refer to it as a K A because it's too confusing otherwise.