Kerosene Disposal

[BorniteIdentity]

We're on the cusp of moving to some retrotastic 60s BungalowShiteâ„¢

 

Among the many items requiring my attention (urine stained carpet in the bathroom and standard issue subsiding garage) is the central heating.

 

Long story short, I'm going to rip the arse out of the Oil Fired Central Heating and replace the lot.

 

This does leave me with approximately 500 litres of Kerosene 28 sec heating oil that the previous owner didn't get to enjoy before the grim reaper tapped him on the right shoulder before hiding to the left.

 

We don't know anyone in the village, and I doubt anyone will want to buy it either with it being so cheap anyway.

 

So, just how different IS it to Derv?

 

Ahem.

[twosmoke300]

Find the nearest farm and offer it to them for their oil fired aga

[burraston2006]

Use a match?!! It would have the added benefit of getting rid of the piss stained carpet, leaky roof, lovely wallpaper...........

[Tamworthbay]

Have lots of hot baths for the first week?

[Lacquer Peel]

It's quite close to diesel, less lubrication, and good for thinning vegetable oil if you live in other countries/drive off road.

[Cavcraft]

The main to difference to DERV is it's 'untaxed' status, not that you'd use it for road fuel, of course. As previously mentioned, farmer probably your best bet, I do know of a company that would take it but they'll charge for the pleasure. 

 

Where are you moving to, he said in a 306-diesel-with-a-Bosch-pump kind of way? 

[Guest Breadvan72]

Buy a vintage British jet eg a De Haviland Vampire, as that is proper aeroshite and runs on kerosene.

 

 

 

[BorniteIdentity]

^My kind of logic.

 

I'm certain that you're my new best friend.

[chaseracer]

[320touring]

@38p/litre you'll have enough to pay scrap value for another car;)

 

http://www.boilerjuice.com/kerosene-prices/

[plasticvandan]

I sometimes use the stuff in my tilley lamp,but at 12 hours running on 1/2 a pint it might take me a while to use it up!

[UltraWomble]

Buy an XUD - Fill tank  - drive it like you stole it.

Or open up a garage selling diesel at 3p/L cheaper than anywhere else around about - until the Revenue catch you and nail your balls to a plank.

 

Well thats what one garage did locally to us.

[Mr_Bo11ox]

Chuck it in the fuel tank of your oldskool diesel with some engine oil at 20-25:1 ratio. Free fuel! I did thousands of miles on this stuff back in the day.

[Taff]

Padwan Borrocks speaketh sense. Internal combustion via Citroen is the bestest way to dispose of this problem

[BorniteIdentity]

So I should buy a car in order to burn it? Because Man Maths.

 

On it.

[LC Torana]

Or a hit-and-miss oil engine, just because.

[davidfowler2000]

Yep. Use it as fuel. Just add oil for lubrication. Personally I'd consider a 50/50 mix with proper derv with a touch of oil so that you don't attract the tax man at a random stop / check for smelling like the arse end of a jet engine test facility.

[2MB]

It does fuckin stink does kerosene, could smell nice mixed wi veg and a bit of two stroke

[sierraman]

Take it down the allotments, a lot if the old timers use it for the greenhouse heater. It gets expensive buying it in 5 litre containers so they would likely be grateful.

[anonymous user]

Do not do what a former colleague did when changing his oil tank; the old steel tank was on its way out so they had used up most of the oil and drained off the rest. The tank was in an awkward place and probably put in before the extension was built so wouldn't come out in one piece. He started to cut the tank up in-situ with an angle grinder, the top came off quite easily but revealed a layer of oily residue/oil in the bottom. He had the brainwave of setting light to it, but not the foresight to move the drained tank away from the bungalow. By the time the fire service had attended it had melted the uPVC guttering and window frames, fortunately it did not burn the place down.

 

As a cynical option to play the long game, find the oldest resident with ill-health and no family, in the new location who has oil-fired heating and give them the oil, they will be so grateful at your generosity you will be quids in when they pop their clogs and leave it all to you

[Sloth in a bowl]

A real man would just drink to lot and to hell with the consequences*.

 

 

*Do NOT drink it, I wouldn't, but then I'm a sloth.

[Pillock]

Buy XUD-powered Peugeot. Buy caravan. Buy towbar.

Gut caravan and install 100 gallon tank. Make sure you leave a vase of flowers in the window so it doesn't look suss.

 

Run pipe from caravantank to Peugeot fuel tank.

Drive to Korea without stopping for fuel.

[omegod]

Do not do what a former colleague did when changing his oil tank; the old steel tank was on its way out so they had used up most of the oil and drained off the rest. The tank was in an awkward place and probably put in before the extension was built so wouldn't come out in one piece. He started to cut the tank up in-situ with an angle grinder, the top came off quite easily but revealed a layer of oily residue/oil in the bottom. He had the brainwave of setting light to it, but not the foresight to move the drained tank away from the bungalow. By the time the fire service had attended it had melted the uPVC guttering and window frames, fortunately it did not burn the place down.

 

As a cynical option to play the long game, find the oldest resident with ill-health and no family, in the new location who has oil-fired heating and give them the oil, they will be so grateful at your generosity you will be quids in when they pop their clogs and leave it all to you

Actually giving it to someone in need seems the most noble solution, guaranteed theres some local old duffer who is terrified to put their heating on for more than 10 mins per day during winter! imagine them all toastie courtesy of you !

 

Or just buy an xud Pug

[Bobthebeard]

Do you have a garden? Buy an old Ferguson tractor and just use it all up chugging around plowing stuff and having fun.

Then sell the tractor. (At a loss of course, this is Autoshite after all.)

[Timewaster]

+1 on the charitable donation to a needy old timer, but unless they live next door how the f does anyone propose to deliver that amount of oil?

[anonymous user]

how the f does anyone propose to deliver that amount of oil?

A few 5 gallon drums at a time, like we used to when the oil tanker couldn't get down the track

[forddeliveryboy]

Or in 205 litre barrels - one per Poojo 205 or two in an estate car.

 

I knew someone who, in a similar predicament, didn't do the obvious and cut it with veg in an old Merc, Audi or Citroen/Peugoet - instead, he bought a lovely old 50s petrol car and cut it with petrol. As he said, who dips classic cars, especially if they're petrol? And who would know a lower compression engine will run on kero/petrol quite happily? It was a longish stroke and ran far better on the mix than on petrol alone. Had it been in this country, it would obviously have been highly illegal, like most things to do with motor cars.

 

I think if you come back from Norway in winter with kero in your tank, and you're dipped, you may get away with it.