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The butt ugly thread

Rusty Pelican

By Rusty Pelican
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Magnificent Rustbucket Rank: Renault 16

Magnificent Rustbucket

Posted
Posted

 

Lots of the new mercedes range seems to look Korean.

 

 

EFA.

 

 

Never have truer words been written on Autoshite.

 

Every time I see a modern Mercedes, I think it screams 'Made in Korea'.  They don't even look like they are made of metal, but moulded in plastic. Especially in white. Why would anyone buy one?

HH-R Rank: Renault 16

HH-R

Posted
Posted

I laughed at the first BMW X6 I saw, what a hideous machine that is. They still look crap but sort of desensitised to it now.

 

Citroen C1 (original) just looks complete shite, almost wilfully ugly. It's gone full circle with the new one, with the Citroen looking the best and the Aygo mega overstyled and awkward.

 

Corsa D pre facelift headlights make it look like a cartoon car that had had something shoved up its arse unexpectedly.

 

Latest Ducato/Citroen and Peugeot equivalent are hideous, what's with the massive "chin"?

 

Any Land Rover past the mk1 Freelander and any Range Rover newer than P38, crass not class.

vulgalour Rank: Matra Rancho towing a Tagora

vulgalour

Posted
Posted

Okay, modernising is inevitable, this isn't too bad...

11344386.jpg

 

...careful...

Jaguar_X308_front_20080325.jpg

 

 

TOO MUCH TAKE IT BACK

2002-jaguar-x-type-photo-9700-s-429x262.

  • Magnificent Rustbucket
  • Like 1
Madman Of The People Rank: BL Wedge

Madman Of The People

Posted
Posted

Pre-facelift Pontiac Aztek.  Cars like this are why Old-GM went bankrupt.

 

Pontiac-Aztek.jpg

  • cros and Magnificent Rustbucket
  • Like 2
oman5 Rank: Renault 16

oman5

Posted
Posted

Okay, modernising is inevitable, this isn't too bad...

11344386.jpg

 

...careful...

Jaguar_X308_front_20080325.jpg

 

 

TOO MUCH TAKE IT BACK

2002-jaguar-x-type-photo-9700-s-429x262.

 

 

Nice. Looks like a larger allegro van den plas

  • Magnificent Rustbucket
  • Like 1
cros Rank: Renault 16

cros

Posted
Posted

This thing deserves another picture. Innovative place to put the engine, under the drivers right hand bum cheek.

post-7547-0-50318600-1427277365_thumb.jpg

  • Craig the Princess
  • Like 1
Negative Creep Rank: Lancia Gamma

Negative Creep

Posted
Posted

/\ GR8 4 WAIT DISTRIBUSHUN

 

 

 

Don't see too many of these horrors on the road, thankfully

 

2010-mazda-mazda3-5dr-hb-man-s-grand-tou

Volksy Rank: Renault 16

Volksy

Posted
Posted

The Nissan Juke looks like an evil Lizard shagging a rather surprised Frog. 

2014-Nissan-Juke-Facelift-Front-carwitte

stillOrange Rank: BL Wedge

stillOrange

Posted
Posted

The Nissan Juke looks like an evil Lizard shagging a rather surprised Frog.

 

2014-Nissan-Juke-Facelift-Front-carwitte

My daughter also sees animal faces in cars...

xtriple Rank: Renault 16

xtriple

Posted
Posted

The back view of the new Honda Insight is pretty gopping, but, the front makes up for it! :)

Madman Of The People Rank: BL Wedge

Madman Of The People

Posted
Posted

The Nissan Juke looks like an evil Lizard shagging a rather surprised Frog. 

 

2014-Nissan-Juke-Facelift-Front-carwitte

 

 

 

At least the old one had a handy wine bottle holder in the front bumper.

 

 

2011-nissan-juke_100337803_l.jpg

jonny69 Rank: Renault 16

jonny69

Posted
Posted

I agree that pug really is the Pitts but you have to remember the people who buy these are only interested in getting from AtoB and their last form of transport was a bus...

 

No, it was a Renault...

D Spares & Tyres Rank: Renault 16

D Spares & Tyres

Posted
Posted

My daughter also sees animal faces in cars...

well mention the lizard/ frog idea to her then........

stillOrange Rank: BL Wedge

stillOrange

Posted
Posted

well mention the lizard/ frog idea to her then........

I bet she would be very interested to see what would come out of it

New POD Rank: Matra Rancho towing a Tagora

New POD

Posted
Posted

New Mazda MX5 - japs, stick to what you know and leave the outrageous styling to the Italians. It looks like Leepu did it.

 

2016-mazda-mx-5-miata-first-drive-review

 

Can not agree more.  I'm sure that 26 years has brought about many technological changes, for the better, making it a nicer car to more people, but it's lost that 'Elan' look and is trying to be a cheap Z4

post-17612-0-97157600-1427318361_thumb.jpg

fred Rank: Renault 16

fred

Posted
Posted

The Nissan Juke looks like an evil Lizard shagging a rather surprised Frog. 

 

2014-Nissan-Juke-Facelift-Front-carwitte

 

 

Been saying similar since it came out looks like a frog bum raping a surprised frog

 

 

Frogs-Mating-1729885.jpg

PhilA Rank: Lancia Gamma

PhilA

Posted
Posted

Basically anything which can be paid for with maximum of two drawouts of the atm machine

Lancia_Y_front101.jpg

For the record, I like ugly cars on the whole. But then I'm the sort of person that buys everything second hand.

That's not design.

I can hear it now. The plet of a wooden ruler being placed down onto the paper pad, then the tk-sssscccccccccht of a pencil being drawn along the edge of it; then a satisfied "Yup, that'll do it." from the holder of the pencil.

 

Noooooooo!

 

Oh well. I guess if you draw a straight line and color in the triangles you get a design, of sorts.

 

Phil

strangeangel Rank: Lancia Gamma

strangeangel

Posted
Posted

Don't be mean! They look like a mini XJ40!

 

IMG_0089.jpg

 

I recognise that Vanden Plas! Some of my old shite used to share that lock up with it.

  • Magnificent Rustbucket
  • Like 1
vulgalour Rank: Matra Rancho towing a Tagora

vulgalour

Posted
Posted

Most of this type of Vauxhall is very nice, but what were they thinking at the front?  It's bos-eyed and it has the bumper running across the grille.  The owner of this one thought that wasn't bad enough so has added a badge bar!  Not only that, view this picture at full size and you'll see some Allegros squatting like a clump of bad potatoes on the hill behind it.  I *like* Allegros, but bugger me they have a lot of bad angles.

 

Vauxhall_Victor_FE_1760cc_first_register

vulgalour Rank: Matra Rancho towing a Tagora

vulgalour

Posted
Posted

Ford are guilty of some pretty heinous style decisions too.  The MkIV Zephyr is pretty appalling, it's like a bad origami model of a car.

 

Ford%20Zephyr%203008E%20front.jpg

  • Magnificent Rustbucket and oman5
  • Like 2
captain_70s Rank: Lancia Gamma

captain_70s

Posted
Posted

Volga_3111.jpg

 

GAZ, go home. You're drunk...

  • SambaS, Magnificent Rustbucket and vulgalour
  • Like 3
oman5 Rank: Renault 16

oman5

Posted
Posted

Ford are guilty of some pretty heinous style decisions too.  The MkIV Zephyr is pretty appalling, it's like a bad origami model of a car.

 

Ford%20Zephyr%203008E%20front.jpg

I reckon they just got the proportions wrong. A longer boot with more rear overhang aft of the rear axle and some bigger rims would have sorted it, more like the PC Cresta

drum Rank: Renault 16

drum

Posted
Posted

Ugly face

 

post-5582-0-71270000-1427418136_thumb.jpg

 

A benevolent surgeon should take this home and graft a new nose on.

PhilA Rank: Lancia Gamma

PhilA

Posted
Posted

Most of this type of Vauxhall is very nice, but what were they thinking at the front?

 

Vauxhall_Victor_FE_1760cc_first_register

General Motors were going through a Big Grille phase. Go take a look at the 1972 Caprice and you'll see the styling cues.

 

1972_Chevrolet_Caprice_Coupe.jpg

Phil

vulgalour Rank: Matra Rancho towing a Tagora

vulgalour

Posted
Posted

That Caprice is worse because it doesn't need the bottom grille to look sexy as a sexy thing.  As it is, they've RUINED it.  Oh, and there was a certain amount of irony to you accusing stylists of using only a ruler given your steed of choice ;)

 

---

 

Do you want a car with Fiat Punto rear lights, looks a bit like a Picasso in profile, has cross-eyed headlights in the wrong place and a grille that looks like an old man pulling his bottom lip up over his face?  Thought not.  Daewoo, on the other hand...

 

Daewoo-Tacuma-18-03.jpg

 

Think it couldn't get worse?  Think again.

1999-daewoo-tacuma-sport-1.jpg

 

Who are you kidding, guy, that bike is never going to fit in there.

1999_Daewoo_Tacuma_Sport_Concept_03.jpg

 

The Reverend Bluejeans Rank: Isuzu Florian

The Reverend Bluejeans

Posted
Posted

I like the Juke.

 

 

Me too. It's a cheerful looking thing that is clearly mental, but they've sold over a million now I believe. I'll have the full fat 240 bhp AWD Nismo version for a laughable 21 grand or the price of a Golf Turbo Dismal with a couple of options.

 

Modern Mercs are just awful. The A Class looks like a Kia with orange peel and the CLA looks like a 1962 Ford Falcon that's been barrel rolled end over end through a tat factory. There isn't a single good looking car in the range.

 

Good looking cars?

 

The current Astra. It's smooth, uncluttered, well proportioned and detailed.

BMW 4 Series Coupe. Man that's a pretty car. They've made it look chunky yet sleek and aggressive without being ugly.

The Current Mazda 6. Looks great in a metallic red.

 

Er.........

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