What the fuck are you looking at?

[dave j]

I saw some people checking out my camper at the weekend and it cheered me up a bit, until they came over and asked whos van it was. They were concerned as i had left my dog in it and they thought he looked distressed! (he was fine, by the way!)

[maxustaxus]

I am a bit awkward talking to people, probaby like most really.

 

So, I hope no one talks to me about my cars or motorbikes, but of course I like it when someone seems to recognise something I am out in.

 

I mainly enjoy old cars for my own nostalgia and memories, if someone else seems to share that then I am really pleased, everything else is hard to understand.

[AlabamaShrimp]

Tbh I don't always like talking to people about my cars but that's only because they almost always ask how much is it worth and that I should put xxxx engine in it.....

[dugong]

Tbh I don't always like talking to people about my cars but that's only because they almost always ask how much is it worth and that I should put xxxx engine in it.....

I find the 'WOTS IT WERF' question rude. It usually finishes with the person asking giving you an insultingly low value based on their 'knowledge' followed by the inevitable comparision with the horse they rode in on, which is always 'immaculate' and worth 'loads more'.

 

What have you got against engine swaps, exactly? It seems to be irritating you of late.

 

Incidentally, why is every car show attendee a concours obsessive? What's wrong with enjoying a car and using it? Why is spending the GDP of a small nation on the paintwork the only way to go? I got rather sick of people patronising me in this regard, so stopped taking the Amazon to shows. It won't be doing many when I've had the rest of it sorted, either, as I'm fed of every appraisal turning into a paintwork critique.

 

Sorry, but my enjoyment of the car does not stem from obsessively cleaning it every 32 minutes and it does not make me a lesser enthusiast as a result.

[Mr_Bo11ox]

Tbh I don't always like talking to people about my cars but that's only because they almost always ask how much is it worth and that I should put xxxx engine in it.....

The fucking bastards!!!! Taking an interest in your car!!! Motherfuckers!!!! Etc.

[Captain Mainwaring]

I don't think women liked my Volvo 340 very much, but then again, I never got chance to ask what they thought after I let them out of the boot.

[Albert Ross]

I found at 17 that driving a 343 got me a shag more than once. (Sorry about the heel marks in the headlining Mum!)

[Jikovron]

If I have to talk about old motors to the public it can be difficult to tailor the conversion to a typical 1-2 spanner rated content, as some questions unwittingly do require a 4 or even 5 spanner response to justify bothering to reply, however ultimately the recipient of the information generally glazes over and as such the effort required to recall detail and put it into an informative verse is wasted.

 

possibly more incredulous to deal with is a lot of 'car' people are horrifyingly willing to lubricate facts with a vast amount of exaggeration : 370bhp rover v8 engines that have rangey manifolds and a mileage edition round bar camshaft, rover P6 diffs being vastly stronger than triumph 2000 items, 1400CVH engines producing 240 'torques' a 155bhp 1300 skoda engine sans anything modified fitted are some of the claims ive heard and I tend to just end up in a sort of screensaver mode

[AlabamaShrimp]

The fucking bastards!!!! Taking an interest in your car!!! Motherfuckers!!!! Etc.

I don't know what cars you've got but my Fiestas attract the OSF mong. Their car or any number of other Fords will always be better than a stock one and they're definitely going to tell you about it.

 

As for why I don't like engine swaps. To me it's a part of the character of the car. It's what was designed to go in it, it's (more than likley) what it came with from the factory and it as much part of its history as anything else. It's like buying an antique and thing "fuck it, it's mine now I'll do what I want" then chopping the legs off

[dugong]

As for why I don't like engine swaps. To me it's a part of the character of the car. It's what was designed to go in it, it's (more than likley) what it came with from the factory and it as much part of its history as anything else. It's like buying an antique and thing "fuck it's mine now I'll do what I want" then chopping the legs off

Well, that's the thing. You seem convinced it's to make some kind of defiant statement, but for a lot of people modifying a car to their taste is part of the ownership experience. Tastes, scenes and results may vary.

 

At one point I considered fitting a turbo to the engine of my Amazon because it ran extremely low compression pistons. Despite an ex-colleague working at Holset, I realised I had no idea was I was doing and so sacked that idea off. It's the execution rather than the modifying mentality that's the crux of the problem for me.

 

I take it I'll be off your New Years Honours list if the knob van ends up with an Mi16?

[chaseracer]

...I tend to just end up in a sort of screensaver mode

 

[Lacquer Peel]

I take it I'll be off your New Years Honours list if the knob van ends up with an Mi16?

 

Y NO XUD11

[AlabamaShrimp]

Lol I would never take away your honours for driving the knob Van it's a very noble task!

 

Is done properly and for the right reasons and properly I don't actually have a problem with it.

I know some engines are utter shit and I think I'd be the first one to change it if I ever owned a 2CV as there just too slow.

 

What I don't like about it is probably the OSF thing again, that everything under XR is shit an automatically should get ripped out. This is very common with fiestas and why one day there will be no unmolested cars left

[RoadworkUK]

My cars get generally ignored.

 

Rover:- Oh, it's just another geriatric in a shiny over-polished Rover, albeit quite a big one. That said, why can I hear The Prodigy coming from the wireless?

 

Peugeot:- This just gets pitied. Seriously.

 

Audi:- Ridiculously, this probably gets the most admiration, albeit from the impressionable VAG OMG Slamm'd pineapple brigade.

[Rusty Pelican]

E30 gets ignored but both imps get stared at , lots of points with comments like " i had one , bloody terrible or i had one bloody superb "

The ex scrapyard van gets the most disbelieving stares of the lot 

 

[forddeliveryboy]

Why is spending the GDP of a small nation on the paintwork the only way to go?

 

Sorry, but my enjoyment of the car does not stem from obsessively cleaning it every 32 minutes and it does not make me a lesser enthusiast as a result.

 

Bodywork is the only way for most to judge an old car without driving it. Sad and the rest, but true. People simply like clean and shiny, it's why people buy a new anything when the old breaks. Clothes are a great example - better a £10 nasty jacket because it's new rather than a beautifully made jacket from the days when we made them here, in quantity. Second-hand, mate? You having a bad time of it? captain_70s has it right, I think.

 

So someone who blows their money on a paint job either has an eye to selling their car (quite often), is more concerned with what others think (usually the case) or there's a genuinely brilliant machine hiding under the back-to-metal re-paint (rare).

 

It's a shame those who think they know what they're looking at usually don't have a clue. A shiny new layer (even with all the hasty prep marks showing from underneath) is often sufficient for people to believe every single component of a car will have been replaced with NOS and the whole lot blueprinted to perfection.

[RayMK]

I don't know what cars you've got but my Fiestas attract the OSF mong. Their car or any number of other Fords will always be better than a stock one and they're definitely going to tell you about it.

 

As for why I don't like engine swaps. To me it's a part of the character of the car. It's what was designed to go in it, it's (more than likley) what it came with from the factory and it as much part of its history as anything else. It's like buying an antique and thing "fuck it's mine now I'll do what I want" then chopping the legs off

I'm not up to speed on autoshite banter.  OSF??  Clearly not Order of St Francis or Off Side Front  .  I used to scowl at chopped, ratlook and re-engined cars but I've seen quite a few of each that were superb - and I've even expressed my admiration to a Saab 96 2stroke owner who had re-engined with a mid mounted V8.  I still scowl at chavved cars.  Very few cars are one-off examples of artistry and prototypes that aren't cut up by their manufacturer(s) are usually tucked up safely in museums.  The rest are simply cars for owners to do what they like with.

[trigger]

Old Skool Ford. 😉

[Alexg]

My Allegro seems to attract genuinely lovely comments from pleasant strangers. More so at petrol stations than at car shows. Some want to know all about it, how I came about owning it and will tell tales of the one their Dad drove to Timbuktu; others just utter words like "beautiful", yes really "beautiful"! It seems normal people are far more appreciative and generally better bunch of eggs than car 'enthusiasts'.

[captain_70s]

Clothes are a great example - better a £10 nasty jacket because it's new rather than a beautifully made jacket from the days when we made them here, in quantity. Second-hand, mate? You having a bad time of it? captain_70s has it right, I think.

 

Funny thing is, a while back I was in a supermarket car park locking up the Dolly 1300, and some middle aged woman walking back to her car called me a "posh bastard".

 

I found this greatly amusing as she had a nearly new Fiesta and I was driving my (admittedly clean and shiny) 38 year old economy car while wearing a 1980s cord sportcoat, a brown suede waistcoat from the 70s, and a floral shirt and pair of bootcut jeans I picked up on sale at Marks and Sparks! I also work as a maintenance guy at a factory where we pack battery eggs... Also, the beard and shoulder length hair isn't a style thing, haircuts and razor blades cost money I'd rather not spend!

 

Now, I'm not sure if standards are getting lower but I'd not consider that posh by any stretch of the imagination...

[stuboy]

about my limit of notoritity

[oman5]

Don't you have an Allegro estate though?

Yes. they still say it though!

[cros]

Re the Bluebird from a young girl at work- " its awful, If it were mine I'd drive it into a wall"

 

Maybe thats how the whole bluebird/banger thing got going?

Un-called for rudeness. Threaten to unplug her red light.

[Jim Bell]

Nobody pays any attention to my car. Until I open the taps and vooosh off into the distance like a bolt of untethered red light sabre being switched on.

At that point I imagine the people in the car behind either say:

 

"I say Dorris. Homeboy straight got some get up and go. Was that a Rover 25? Mrs Warbouys car never seems to move that quickly."

 

Or

 

"Wanker".

[Angrydicky]

Oh yes. I'm always getting people talking to me in petrol stations and car parks about the Somerset or the A35. "I learnt to drive in one of them" "Me graaandad 'ad one of them" and so on. Mostly quite friendly. I have had a few of the "WOTS IT WURFF?"s that Dugong mentioned, and I find them a bit irritating really. I've also had people trying to buy the plate on the A35, told "the plate's worth more than the car innit", and had a couple of idiots tell me the Somerset needed restoring and a paint job. Obviously get quite a lot of people staring and pointing as well, both pedestrians and other motorists.

The Atlantic was a nightmare. Every time I took it out I would get people asking me what it was, and the most irritating was I got the people telling me it needed to be restored EVERY SINGLE TIME. 

The Maestro is generally quite anonymous, but I have had a few people speak to me about it, mainly saying how rare it is to see one nowadays, and one in such good condition too.

The Vauxhall I can tell is going to be quite popular already, on the motorway on the way home I noticed several people smiling and rubbernecking at it, but that might have been because I was in the outside lane at 75! I did get accosted by a chap when taking pictures of it yesterday, who kept thanking me as he had a few in the 70s and 80s, and seeing another one had made his day.

[UmBongo]

A little kid on a BMX asked me if  my car was fast.

 

Now, it is a fast looking car, but not particularly fast.

 

I can't remember what I told the kid.

 

I think it was something along the lines of 'Faster than your bike, wee man.'

[scruff]

 

So someone who blows their money on a paint job either has an eye to selling their car (quite often), is more concerned with what others think (usually the case) or there's a genuinely brilliant machine hiding under the back-to-metal re-paint (rare).

 

It's a shame those who think they know what they're looking at usually don't have a clue. A shiny new layer (even with all the hasty prep marks showing from underneath) is often sufficient for people to believe every single component of a car will have been replaced with NOS and the whole lot blueprinted to perfection.

 

How true that is. I am lucky to have driven many "restored" vehicles - the best are always those that still look old but have had the works mechanically and then just used, second only to those that have been kept going and safe but never been completely apart. A lot of "painted ladies" drive like shit; and those that have had a chequebook thrown at them and seldom used since tend to feel like a lot of component parts bolted together and not a complete vehicle.

 

"WHEN R U PAINTING IT LOL" 

[vulgalour]

Princess gets all the usual strike-red robbo-rust-wonky hydragas remarks.  I've only taken it to one show proper and it got a LOT of attention, mostly along the lines of people  remembering them all looking like that back in the day and while they probably didn't mean it positively that's how I took it.  There's the rivet counters too, like the old bloke recently who tried to tell me the wheel trims were aftermarket and that lots of things on it were 'illegal' and 'wrong', but he'd just paid £1500 for a Daewoo Matiz and was proud of it so I just smiled and nodded until he wandered off.

 

Renault 6TL has already had it's first "what is it" and "that's HORRIBLE" so anything else after that is a bonus.

 

I've never been asked how much any of my cars are worth, probably because they're all so miserably shite and that's good too. 

[spike60]

I ran a 1992 Corvette as a daily for about 6 years and about half the time you called in a petrol station or supermarket someone would have something to say, usually friendly. The exceptions were young males who could tell me all that was wrong with it despite never having even sat in one. Clarksons' word is gospel to them.

You become public property to some degree, some folk think you want their unasked for opinions though when it got it's pic taken I took it as a compliment.

You have to consider you musical tastes too, singing along with the Scissor sisters at the lights in town with the roof off provides the local Yoof with some ammo!

Pic from when I sold it a couple of years back.

 

[Pillock]

When I had a VW Type3, I'd get loads of people asking about it, telling me how cool it was.

 

Usually "Nice Volvo mate" or "Wow, not seen one of those Skodas for ages"