OMGWINDKHAOS!!!!111 Apocolypse Survivalists Thread

[beko1987]

Anyone got any funny wind related driving stories to tell?

 

8 largeish trees down inbetween home and work, all but 1 were on the other side of the road, one wasnt but it was clear so I went round.

 

M40 is solid, as is the A404. A404 has a very large tree down from what I can almost overhear some colleagues talking about, although it may be a rhino on the tracks.

 

Loads of wheelie bins on their side.

 

I've just run out of Vimto, but have some super noodles in my middle drawer

 

Car is ok, and fully waterproof now. I R SURVIVING.

[cms206]

Me and Dave flew into THE EYE OF TEH STROM and drove back from Bristol through wind, rain and sunshine and WE SURVIVED.

[dollywobbler]

I slept.

[beko1987]

The local train line is cancelled, so got to bunk out fo work for half an hour and pick some people up. Was stupendously dull, not one corpse hanging from a tree anywhere. 1/10

[Partridge]

Anyone got any funny wind related driving stories to tell?

 

One I farted in a Daewoo Nexia.

 

If you have super noodles-you'll be fine. I'm down to half a packet of bacon frazzles and some bombay pot noodles.

 

A large stick has landed on roof of the Mercedes. There's a very small dent...what a shame, MY MINT E-CLASS!

 

I HAZ BEEN SURVIYVIVING.

[rml2345]

Nothing to do with the recent hurricane, but the last one to hit Scotlandshire was christened "Hurricane Bawbag" which still makes me chuckle.

Sorry, no car content.

[Junkman]

There are leaves and a few twigs on the roads here this morning.

This has never before happened at this time of the year.

So it's either OMGwewillalldieofglobalwarming, or the Last Judgement.

We are all doomed. The end is nigh.

[Partridge]

Junkman, it's been a pleasure knowing you, but The Stick That Falleth in The Road brings the end. The Mayans predicted it. 

[brickwall]

Was a clear night up here on Jockistan, and it's beautiful and sunny now. Just took the pooch for a play in the fields with her best pal whippet

[Junkman]

I bet if an income-independent Wind Tax was introduced for all people earning under £30k, we'd all be safe.

[Justin Case]

 

There are leaves and a few twigs on the roads here this morning.

This has never before happened at this time of the year.

So it's either OMGwewillalldieofglobalwarming, or the Last Judgement.

We are all doomed. The end is nigh.

Storms in Britain, especially Southern England are mainly caused by the North Atlantic Oscillation, which measures changes in the air pressure between the Azores and Iceland. I blame it all on the horsemeat in their burgers.

[Sigmund Fraud]

Irritatingly, there were quite a few people who didn't come to work today 'because of the weather'   I suppose that having to avoid a couple of twigs requires ownership of a Range Rover and driving skills which are beyond most people.

 

I made a point by commuting in the 'hairdresser special', as we all know that lowered floppytops are perfectly suited to the ARMAGEDDON.

[wuvvum]

I had to swerve round a smallish tree branch on the way into work this morning.  That was the only thing out of the ordinary, apart from the amount of dead leaves on the road and the fact that I got stuck behind some cockend in a JCB forklift doing 20mph along a NSL A-road for 6 miles before I was able to get past him.  This may not have been strictly storm-related though.

 

Norfolk seems to have avoided the worst of it - the highest gust recorded in the county was 53mph, and I managed to cycle the usual last 3 miles of the journey to work at what would have been pretty much the height of the storm.  I got rather wet and most of the time I was in a lower gear than usual, but that was it.

 

Our London office is completely dead though - everyone who works there lives outside London and commutes by train, so nobody has been able to get in.

[Junkman]

 

 

Storms in Britain, especially Southern England are mainly caused by the North Atlantic Oscillation, which measures changes in the air pressure between the Azores and Iceland. I blame it all on the horsemeat in their burgers.

 

I always thought they are caused by a butterfly flipping its wing in Kermadec, but you learn something new every day, as they say.

[Shep Shepherd]

A slate came off my roof at around 0700, which is the sum total of the storm damage in my immediate area.

[Partridge]

You were lucky to survive. Have you had a paramedic check over you?

Also, you and your family should be offered alternative accommodation by the council? There's no way you can live in a house in that state!

[beko1987]

Just been round to my mums for lunch, and had to pick all the garden furniture up.

 

Looking at the concrete bird table, wrought iron table etc lying on their sides I enquired if it had been a bit breezy overnight.

 

"No, I got Keith (stepdad) to lay them down last night just in case..."

 

The fucked fence which is pretty much only held up by the ivy that grows on it was fine, let alone a bird table that weighs as much as my car (or felt like it)

 

OMGALLOLDPEOPLEZOVERDRAMATIZEEVERYFING

[cort16]

My wheely bin moved 7 inches over night. Gripping stuff. I sat up for 7 hours watching it.

[beko1987]

You were lucky to survive. Have you had a paramedic check over you?

Also, you and your family should be offered alternative accommodation by the council? There's no way you can live in a house in that state!

 

[Shep Shepherd]

You were lucky to survive. Have you had a paramedic check over you?

Also, you and your family should be offered alternative accommodation by the council? There's no way you can live in a house in that state!

 

I should share my story with the Southend Echo. It would make the front page of any edition, not just today's 'storm special', which is no doubt in the works as I type this

[Partridge]

 let alone a bird table that weighs as much as my car (or felt like it)

 

 

Wow. Just imagine a Citroen bird table.

[Lord Sterling]

Absolutely F*CK all. Birmingham seems DETERMINED to stay, mild and dry and even sunny. 

[jmsguzzi]

Theirs a plastic bag stuck in the thorn bush in my back garden.

[Partridge]

Theirs a plastic bag stuck in the thorn bush in my back garden.

I think you're making outlandish stuff up for attention.

[jmsguzzi]

I think you're making outlandish stuff up for attention.

How dare you, this is serious shit. I just severed my finger trying to get it off!

[bub2006]

I was sat in the shed last night. Idly flicking through the 1983 aa car mechanic folder ( lots of info in there. Want to know the firing order of a hillman im your man) when the perspective window started rattling. I evacuated promptly and hid under a table.

[bub2006]

Perspex not perspective*

[Lukas]

That´s a picture that´s in our news today. Taken in London:

 

[Junkman]

A tree fell.

[Spiny Norman]

I wonder what shit the government has managed to sneak through parliament while everyone and his dog has been dealing with OMGSTORMKAOS?

 

Not to make light of a serious weather event that's claimed the lives of two people but it's nice to see the south of England enjoying a typical Scottish summer's day.

Who can forget the classic Hurricane Bawbag and the shite devastation it caused across central Scotland. Property worth almost £3.20 was lost that fateful day, including some family's most treasured possession.