Most inappropriately named shite car

[quicksilver]

9 hours ago, Mrcento said:

You could pretty much fill this whole thread just with Vauxhall trim levels.

Particular highlights though are

ENJOY

and

EXCITE!

 

My Corsa was an 'Expression', mostly an expression of disappointment at its poverty spec and coarse 3-cylinder engine. The family Zafira is a 'Comfort',  which implies the existence of an uncomfortable version.

[Asimo]

On 01/03/2024 at 20:27, 666jjp said:

Skoda Superb

I always think of these as Skoda Super Bee.
Because I remember one of these in a magazine and the Dodge is just a bit more desirable…

[dozeydustman]

2 hours ago, EyesWeldedShut said:

I had a 1978 Escort GL (in 1983) - as far as I could see that got me a  clock and a radio over the L model. A mate had a Ghia (whoo) and he had a radio/cassette with push button tuning plus some extra bling like chromed door mirror. Neither had a passenger side mirror and the rear seat fabric rotted across the top where the sun struck it on both. Luxury!

Didn’t GL trim Mk2s have halogen (square) headlamps as well? It does boggle me somewhat how trim levels used to be worked out, especially when base models has a trim level which would normally indicate an amount of grandiose.

’Super’ was also often used to denote the ultimate misery spec, 

[lesapandre]

1 hour ago, dozeydustman said:

Didn’t GL trim Mk2s have halogen (square) headlamps as well? It does boggle me somewhat how trim levels used to be worked out, especially when base models has a trim level which would normally indicate an amount of grandiose.

’Super’ was also often used to denote the ultimate misery spec, 

Super - everything superfluous has been left out...

[Spiny Norman]

I was sat behind something called a VW Taigo yesterday. How to get your windows tanned in certain parts of Glasgow....
 

[Spiny Norman]

7 hours ago, dozeydustman said:

Isuzu Bighorn.

SUVs are a rich vein of ridiculous names, from the Hyundai Terracan to the Maserati Kaboom or whatever it was called. And it can't just be my borderline dyslexia that reads the name of that stupid big Bentley thing as Bentgay?
Ferrari Purosangue? I don't care what it means in its native language, in English it sounds like an ointment for vaginal thrush.

At the other end of the scale, who remembers the Fiat Uno Start?

[Metal Guru]

4 minutes ago, Spiny Norman said:

SUVs are a rich vein of ridiculous names, from the Hyundai Terracan to the Maserati Kaboom or whatever it was called. And it can't just be my borderline dyslexia that reads the name of that stupid big Bentley thing as Bentgay?
Ferrari Purosangue? I don't care what it means in its native language, in English it sounds like an ointment for vaginal thrush.

At the other end of the scale, who remembers the Fiat Uno Start?

The Chevy Nova ( muscle car not the Vauxhall one) wasn’t sold in Spanish speaking countries as it means “no go” . 
MR2 is pronounced like  “merde” (shit in French ) so unsurprisingly struggled there.

[MiniMinorMk3]

8 hours ago, dozeydustman said:

My dad and his workmates loved hooning their HA around Trafalgar Square making it backfire to scare the pigeons. Being employers of GPO Telephones/Tittish Bellycom your phone bill money was wisely spent.

I worked for BT for a bit. The fun with the HA (or Marina van) was going down hill You just switch of the ignition for  couple of seconds then switch it on again. Bang and everyone is looking round to see where it came from.

5 hours ago, Metal Guru said:

Allegro means fast in Italian, so it’s doubly named badly.

I guess that's why Innocenti named their version the Regent.

[MiniMinorMk3]

Hyundai Stella, doesn't even get you pissed.

[MiniMinorMk3]

For those in the USA this car came with a handy reminder of an emergency phone number on the dash for when you wrapped it around a tree.

[EyesWeldedShut]

6 hours ago, dozeydustman said:

Didn’t GL trim Mk2s have halogen (square) headlamps as well? It does boggle me somewhat how trim levels used to be worked out, especially when base models has a trim level which would normally indicate an amount of grandiose.

’Super’ was also often used to denote the ultimate misery spec, 

Oooh yes - it had square headlights and sort of metallic paint (I was never too sure). It ran well enough, used to sit parked up during the week and I used it only at weekends - sometimes 2 - 3 weeks it'd just sit out in the resident's parking bays and it never FTP'd. It needed a sill welding for the 1983 MoT which is the only thing (other than a service) it got in two years of my ownership.

I think chrome stripes and mudflaps may have figured someplace in the line up too.

Ford I used to like was a Capri 1300 XL (whoooo!) that we'd walk past on the way to school and gawp at the wing badge -'jeez, I bet that thing really flies, being an XL, y'ken?'

XL meaning what?
Xtra Long, Extra Limp Mode?

[Dyslexic Viking]

According to several sources, Honda Jazz was supposed to be called Honda Fitta until someone told them that Fitte/Fitta in Norwegian is a rough slang word for a woman's genitals.

And according to one of these sources, Honda had planed to use this under to describe their new car model also.

The Fitta is small on the outside, but big when you get inside. A daily pleasure!

[horriblemercedes]

3 hours ago, Metal Guru said:

The Chevy Nova ( muscle car not the Vauxhall one) wasn’t sold in Spanish speaking countries as it means “no go” . .

They sold pretty well in Mexico and Venezuela 

[D.E]

Tang Hua Book of Songs.

[quicksilver]

8 minutes ago, D.E said:

Tang Hua Book of Songs.

And next to it is the even more bizarrely named Detroit Fish. There was a third called the Piece of Cloud.

[Quintus]

12 hours ago, dozeydustman said:

Isuzu Bighorn.

Have seen one of these in the metal. I remained flaccid.

[lesapandre]

4 hours ago, Dyslexic Viking said:

According to several sources, Honda Jazz was supposed to be called Honda Fitta until someone told them that Fitte/Fitta in Norwegian is a rough slang word for a woman's genitals.

And according to one of these sources, Honda had planed to use this under to describe their new car model also.

The Fitta is small on the outside, but big when you get inside. A daily pleasure!

Gives a whole new meaning to the phrase: 

"I'm going to the gym to get fitter"

[Metal Guru]

8 hours ago, MiniMinorMk3 said:

Hyundai Stella, doesn't even get you pissed.

Maybe you need to be pissed to want one.

[Pieman]

21 hours ago, Spiny Norman said:

And it can't just be my borderline dyslexia that reads the name of that stupid big Bentley thing as Bentgay?

I've always called it the Bentgayer.  Similar to the Range Rover Vulgar, the Rolls-Royce Cunnilingus and the Lamborghini Urinal (or Anus).

20 hours ago, Metal Guru said:

MR2 is pronounced like  “merde” (shit in French ) so unsurprisingly struggled there.

They changed it to MR-S in French-speaking countries for that very reason.