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eBay tat volume 3.

Ross_K

By Ross_K
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Junkman Rank: Matra Rancho towing a Tagora

Junkman

Posted
Posted

The fascinating thing about eBay, and the real reason why I spend so much time on it, are not the cars, which are overwhelmingly clapped out wrecks too hanging for even scrapping. It's the mind blowingly daft horseshit people write and the gloriously half arsed photos they deem worthy of taking up bandwith. I also have this total obsession with the surroundings they photograph their rubbish in. How many people in the fifth wealthiest country on the planet carve out an existence on a plot that makes a village in the Democratic Republic of Congo look posh in comparison, and then post photos of it on the internet, is staggering!

Junkman Rank: Matra Rancho towing a Tagora

Junkman

Posted
Posted

All of them are shit, mind.

 

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Vauxhall-12-4-i-type-1939-Excellent-project-with-lots-of-work-already-done/223300934166

s-l1600.jpg

 

 

The ad does not mention with one word whether the car is running or not!

 

However,

 

lots of work already done

 

If brushing the front wings with a coat of Hammerite is your concept of 'lots of work', the old car hobby might not be for you.

 

 

Let's move on to what is included in the sale:

 

s-l1600.jpg

 

s-l1600.jpg

 

Fucking brilliant.

 

 

 

Want to see the interior, too, to enable you to form an educated estimation of the scope of the work necessary?

 

Okay...

 

s-l1600.jpg

 

 

 

Now, this is the ad of a company! You are dealing with professionals here!

  • somewhatfoolish and mercrocker
  • Like 2
Junkman Rank: Matra Rancho towing a Tagora

Junkman

Posted
Posted

 

barn find

 

 

That's sooooo earlier this year. The term now in fashion is hot rod.

 

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/1977-Austin-allegro-barn-find/143068799191

s-l1600.jpg

 

 

He pretty much opens the ad with

 

 

Been sold for full restoration

 

 

He then describes the faults surprisingly detailed. Even if you add them all up, the car merely requires some tidying and is far away from necessitating a full restoration.

 

Then comes this classic:

 

 

I have brought two good replacement Bumbers

 

It made my day before 8am.

Junkman Rank: Matra Rancho towing a Tagora

Junkman

Posted
Posted

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Classic-beetle/323624336399
s-l1600.jpg
 
 



Relisted to an absolute idiot.

 
Well thank you very much.
Despite it's factually correct, you didn't have to rub it in, you Dubber.

 

 

 

i have been driving her around last month. 

Tax and MOT exempt so cheap insurance and she will drive away

 

It shows untaxed since 1994. What would it have taken to tax it? Who is the absolute idiot now?

  • mercrocker, egg and spike60
  • Like 3
Junkman Rank: Matra Rancho towing a Tagora

Junkman

Posted
Posted

Pickup Barn Find Project

 

 

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Ford-Escort-35-Popular-G-Reg-1989-Mk4-Van-Pickup-Barn-Find-Project/303010087942

s-l1600.jpg

 

 

Ideal* WBoD.

 

s-l1600.jpg

 

 

Getting very hard to find in this condition

There will not be the day terminally fucked Escort vans are hard to find.

 

 

 

It does run and drive fine  just that all the brakes have been took off all comes with the vehicle  I have tried  starting the engine but it just turns over at the minute

 

Do I understand this correctly? It does run and drive fine without brakes and the engine not firing?

You are the weakest link. Good bye.

spartacus Rank: Renault 16

spartacus

Posted
Posted

Ah Junkman, when I first discovered this site in my darkest days I could rely on your ramblings to make me smile.

You even had your own clickbait tag, 'do not read the ad!' inevitably I would and perhaps discover an entire tome written in CAPITALS, or without the use of any punctuation.

Please carry on, as long as your health and sanity can remain unaffected!

Junkman Rank: Matra Rancho towing a Tagora

Junkman

Posted
Posted

Ah Junkman, when I first discovered this site in my darkest days I could rely on your ramblings to make me smile.

You even had your own clickbait tag, 'do not read the ad!' inevitably I would and perhaps discover an entire tome written in CAPITALS, or without the use of any punctuation.

Please carry on, as long as your health and sanity can remain unaffected!

 

 

Thank you so much!

I must say that since I live in the parallel universe of R16 ownership a lot of my long lost sanity returned.

I shall continue to entertain you folks with my trademark lack of air quotes, I promise.

  • Jerzy Woking, primeradoner, bangernomics and 3 others
  • Like 6
The Reverend Bluejeans Rank: Isuzu Florian

The Reverend Bluejeans

Posted
Posted

What bunch of imbeciles has bid that pile of scrap to meanwhile over 700 quid then?

Which bar of gold hidden in plain view am I missing?

Banger racers. They’ll pay a grand plus for an Oxbridge to destroy.

Asimo Rank: Isuzu Florian

Asimo

Posted
Posted

E series Marinas should have 6 cylinders but the brown auto would do until a 2.6 turns up.

  • MorrisItalSLX
  • Like 1
The Reverend Bluejeans Rank: Isuzu Florian

The Reverend Bluejeans

Posted
Posted

That's sooooo earlier this year. The term now in fashion is hot rod.

 

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/1977-Austin-allegro-barn-find/143068799191

s-l1600.jpg

 

 

He pretty much opens the ad with

 

 

 

He then describes the faults surprisingly detailed. Even if you add them all up, the car merely requires some tidying and is far away from necessitating a full restoration.

 

Then comes this classic:

 

 

It made my day before 8am.

 

 

 

What amazes me about the Allegro is how well they have survived. Thinking back, they were never a rot prone car whilst everything else BL made, was.

MorrisItalSLX Rank: Lancia Gamma

MorrisItalSLX

Posted
Posted

E series Marinas should have 6 cylinders but the brown auto would do until a 2.6 turns up.

I’d be happy with any motor, the Big Six would just be a bonus!

What you really want is the twin carb 2.6 from the Austin Kimberley.

MorrisItalSLX Rank: Lancia Gamma

MorrisItalSLX

Posted
Posted

That’s no HL, that’s a HLS my dear boy.

 

And if it was a badermatic, it would be mine already.

  • oldcars and The Reverend Bluejeans
  • Like 2
The Reverend Bluejeans Rank: Isuzu Florian

The Reverend Bluejeans

Posted
Posted

Damn! 

 

It's going through in 2 hours time. 

 

It's at £225 plus fees so someone wants it quite badly. It was probably a decent car when new.

Cavcraft Rank: Matra Rancho towing a Tagora

Cavcraft

Posted
Posted

The fascinating thing about eBay, and the real reason why I spend so much time on it, are not the cars, which are overwhelmingly clapped out wrecks too hanging for even scrapping. It's the mind blowingly daft horseshit people write and the gloriously half arsed photos they deem worthy of taking up bandwith. I also have this total obsession with the surroundings they photograph their rubbish in. How many people in the fifth wealthiest country on the planet carve out an existence on a plot that makes a village in the Democratic Republic of Congo look posh in comparison, and then post photos of it on the internet, is staggering!

 

Couldn't agree more. This thread is great because of all the absolute lunatics selling vehicles out there, as much as the vehicles themselves.

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