Tips you'd give people who have just got X car...

[Bear]

Not necessarily obscure, but things that you wish someone had gone "hang on a minute, it works this way" before you broke/got entangled in something...

 

Mine:

Citroen/PSA doors - the little square section in the door lock button releases a tiny grippy part. Push it in and down and it'll release the knob easily!

 

Renault Avantime: You can change the rev counter bulbs without taking anything apart. Use a 6mm socket with some bluetack and reach up from the footwell.

 

Mercedes: The door trims are often designed to lift off as a module. RTFM before touching anything. They do NOT clip on flat in many cases. (I knew this, but I wish the people who had my cars beforehand had).

 

Toyota Sera: Before spending hundreds on trying to fix doors, make sure those pivots on the door strut are free to move.

 

Chrysler Voyager: Just RTFM and take the wiper motor and scuttle section off before doing rear plugs on the V6. It is MUCH easier than trying to scrabble around and cheat.

 

Okay... is enough for now.

[John F]

V6 Cavalier / Calibra: the alternator lives behind the rear bank of cylinders, in a hot place... make sure the alternator cooler fan is working & the ducting is in place, otherwise the alternator can burn out. And you have to remove the o/s drive shaft to get it out through the wheelarch.

[Bear]

Oh yeah, fans - Mercedes have cooling fans in their ECU boxes on many models. Check they work! And they can often be repaired with cheap motors.

[MorrisItalSLX]

Jaguar XJ Series 3 - For the XK engine, it is much easier to remove the stater motor from the bottom of the car, rather than removing all the engine ancillaries/injection rails/air box/etc. that obscure the stater motor from the top.

[Ghosty]

R8: don't pull the stalk for the flasher too hard as it's also the main beam switch. It latches so if it's been pressed you get main beam instead of dipped next time you put the lights on. There's no way of knowing what position it's in, either.

Also, the fuel filler release is in the driver's footwell (a Honda quirk).

[vaughant]

Hmmmm so where do I start. Recent cars:

 

VW gearbox linkage alignment : rtfm or view ewe-tube, piece of piss then, solve 90% of crap gearbox issues. And change the oil, do it now, or you may lose 5th, also helps the changes become silky smooth*

 

Vauxhall stuff (mid nineties to early 2000's).

 

Immobiliser. If swapping out an engine the immobiliser suits in the wiring loom where the two multiplexer connectors sit, it's a silver box and is often ignored on an engine swap with the original of the donor car used, caught me out on a 96 corsa and diet soda and giggles I tried the same (after proving it worked first) on my zafira, same scenario, turns over but no start.

 

It's also much easier on this generation of vaux to drop the subframe off first for anything major, engine/gearbox swaps etc, not try to leave it all on, it's nigh on impossible to realign afterwards with all the engine/box weight on it. You WILL lose the gearbox oil on these when shafts are removed.

Also, loads of Astra g parts for on them but not the steering coupler, is about 20mm to short but will tease you by almost lining up, wasted a whole night on that little bugger.

 

(Learnt on Monday): the crank main MIDDLE bearings on a pug/PSA 1.9 have (X2) 13mm bolts holding them in from the block end, they won't come off otherwise.

 

Subaru impreza: don't even attempt to change things like the clutch/gearbox on the street, the whole engine/box assembly comes out in a 1/4 of the time (ok if you have a 2 poster is possible to do it in place but not for a novice) and makes life SOOOOOOOO much easier. I couldn't get over how easy it was to drop the lot, all the access in the world then. Tried explaining this to a boy on passionford who basically called me a r-tard..... He was still trying to change the clutch 3 months later and I think needed professional help in the end to do it.

 

Applies to any car: get belts off and on using a rag/old pair of overalls. Easy when you know how, always try to put it back on via the longest run of the belt, makes life a lot easier. A good hard pull of the rag springs back most tensioners enough to hoick the belt over the pulley and the rash simply pulls back out.

 

Battery going flat overnight?

 

Get an ok multimeter (you really should have one of these anyway), disconnect battery terminal and connect your multimeter to current or amps (A) setting.

Wire the meter in series with your battery cable i.e remove batt neg lead,jubilee/croc clip positive multimeter lead to terminal,fro negative lead on multimeter to female connector on recently removed neg terminal. Check there's a current reading, should be v low but by turning on/off interior lights or the like, it will start to jump up a lot. To find the rougue circuit, leave connected and see what current it's drawing, my guess it up to an amp or more if it's unhealthy. Start removing fuses one by one and see which circuit the current drops off on, that's your rogue circuit, this should give you a clue then as to what's connected through that fuse and a much better chance of finding the problem.

[mk2_craig]

e46 facelift steering wheel, airbag removal. Fucking impossible to release the two meaty retaining springs as you're doing it blind pushing two flatheads through the back of the wheel, unless you have a spare one to practice on off the car, in which case it is an absolute piece of piss.

[rantingYoof]

S60 manual: it's better than a Geartronic but yes, it is genuinely that notchy. This is the car Volvo said would 'challenge the 3 Series', I know. And the turning circle is genuinely that rubbish too...there's nothing wrong with your rack (ooeeer etc).

 

Sent from my GT-I9505 using Tapatalk

[cpjitservices]

Galaxy 2003 - Check and keep an eye on the under bonnet battery fuse box - they do catch fire. 

[bramz7]

Citroen ZX- They do rot pretty well. Check inner wings both front and rear.

 

Any XUD engined car-get a drip tray if you don't want oil all over your driveway

[BavarianRetro]

e46 facelift steering wheel, airbag removal. Fucking impossible to release the two meaty retaining springs as you're doing it blind pushing two flatheads through the back of the wheel, unless you have a spare one to practice on off the car, in which case it is an absolute piece of piss.

The second one you do is a dawdle. Just don't make your first one a spotless M3 one.

[fordperv]

Pinto stem seals, dont bother taking the head off, take out the cam followers and each cylinder your doing fill it with 8mm rope, then wind the cylinder up in its bore until it won't go further, this pushes the rope against the valve and holds it in place, then use a suitable tool to depress the valve spring cap and remove the collets, also put cvh ones in, its much easier even though you can get the head off in around 30 mins the main thing is it's cheaper

[D Spares & Tyres]

Capri

 

Don't have the window open in the rain, it flicks round and goes in your face

[Mr A Lawrence]

Any car.

 

Changing the steering wheel, undo the big nut but don't take it right off.

 

When you yank on the wheel to remove it it won't hit you in the face resulting in a trip to casualty with a deep cut across your nose and a black eye.

 

So I've been told.

[Junkman]

Rover P6 - Do not remove the sill covers.

 

More seriously:

 

On all post 1974 yanks, i.e. all with breakerless ignition, make sure you set the spark plug gaps according to spec.

The American ignitions are more powerful and do require bigger plug gaps than Yeerpeens. If you don't adjust them, they run like shit.

 

Always use original spec plug leads on old yanks. That aftermarket yellow, red or blue stuff might look spiffy* but it's designed for racing.

In America this means it has to to give maximum performance for ten seconds and then be switched off.

The same goes for all other aftermarket ignition components. Besides, none of this 'upgrade' stuff is designed to work in any weather

but blistering sunshine.

 

Don't festoon your poor yank engines with chromed dress up items. These are for show cars, not road cars. The chromed pieces are

preventing proper heat dissipation and are made in Taiwan, so they will remain untarnished only for an afternoon if exposed to any

climate outside an air conditioned exhibition hall.

[D Spares & Tyres]

Peugeot 405 heater matrix

 

Don't take the dash out

 

Remove the glovebox. Saw through the metal tube

 

Get a friend to pull on the lower part of the dash while you slide the matrix in

[D Spares & Tyres]

Renault Laguna

 

Don't attempt to fix a fault.

 

When it breaks, scrap it

[Junkman]

Capri

 

Don't have the window open in the rain, it flicks round and goes in your face

 

 

If you drive a 405 with an open driver's window, don't use the screen wash.

The car is carefully designed for the dirty water to run off the windscreen around the A pillar and drip exactly into the window switches.

[Junkman]

Pinto stem seals, dont bother taking the head off, take out the cam followers and each cylinder your doing fill it with 8mm rope, then wind the cylinder up in its bore until it won't go further, this pushes the rope against the valve and holds it in place, then use a suitable tool to depress the valve spring cap and remove the collets, also put cvh ones in, its much easier even though you can get the head off in around 30 mins the main thing is it's cheaper

 

Alternatively, use the non British method of attaching an air pipe to the plug hole and pump the cylinder up with compressed air.

Then proceed as described by fordperv, with the 'suitable tool' usually being a nut and a hammer.

Works on all engines and frankly, I have never seen it done any other way until I visited the Ununited Kingdom.

[sierraman]

Thinking of buying a diesel for a couple of grand?

 

Don't. Go in to the garden and chuck handfuls of notes into a big fuck off fire. Spend what you've got left on train fares.

[D Spares & Tyres]

When buying a Volvo, remove the indicator stalk and sell it on eBay to recoupe some cash. You won't ever need it anyway

[Cleon-Fonte]

Rover SD1 - Don't buy one unless you're on a similar salary to Chris Evans.

[Cleon-Fonte]

Old PSA-era Citroens - do not, under any circumstances, undertake any job without having every single part you could ever conceivably have to replace on hand in advance, even if it's highly unlikely you'll need it. In the event that you do need to replace X obscure item, it's best to have it ready available rather than have the car in bits for months as you try to find it.

[Guest Hooli]

R8: don't pull the stalk for the flasher too hard as it's also the main beam switch. It latches so if it's been pressed you get main beam instead of dipped next time you put the lights on. There's no way of knowing what position it's in, either.

 

Since owning a Polo years ago I have always 'double flashed' for the same reason. Two clicks, two flashes & I know it's back on dipped beam for when I need the lights.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Laguna - Just don't!

[DVee8]

When buying a Volvo, remove the indicator stalk and sell it on eBay to recoupe some cash. You won't ever need it anyway

Repeat for BMW.

[Mr A Lawrence]

And Audi.

[eddyramrod]

Rover SD1/SD3: do not touch unless totally mint in every way.

[Brodders]

Any Rover: If the garage says the head gasket has gone, there is a pretty decent chance that it hasn't actually gone and something else has happened.

[Pat Earrings]

MK1 Focus 1.8 Pez - When replacing the ICV, don't bother trying to get at the bottom bolt from the top, despite what Haynes and Youtube tells you. It's fucking nigh on impossible to get at it. Go via the bottom, can be tricky to see but once located, makes the job a breeze.

[0ldCh0d]

VW Golf MK5.........2004-2008

 

If you happen to get/have one of these & the electric window regulator/s has/have failed (The stupid plastic cable holders dissolve over time) do not attempt to fix it from the inside, by just removing the door panel, as you will not get to the offending item.

 

You need to remove the outer door skin/panel, which is handily bolted on.

 

Once outer door skin/panel is off, you will see the offending window regulator. I only know this because I replaced one a couple of months ago.

 

Oh & the bolts that hold the outer door skin on are different lengths, so DO NOT just put them back in anywhere, they need to go back exactly where they came from.

 

This also applies if you get/have one that has a dented/scuffed etc door panel, easily replaced, in the correct VW colour.