Fatharris' bargain basement barge (HermanTheGerman)

[fatharris]

Just as quickly as joy begins, it's taken away from me.

 

Now being a bastard to start, idles really low and a blip of the throttle causes it to stumble, rev, then stall.

 

Any suggestions welcomed, as time is running out.

 

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[Pillock]

Fuel blockage or crap pez from being stood?

[fatharris]

It's had six gallons poured in over the last couple of days, but it's a possibility.

[BavarianRetro]

Just as quickly as joy begins, it's taken away from me.

 

Now being a bastard to start, idles really low and a blip of the throttle causes it to stumble, rev, then stall.

 

Any suggestions welcomed, as time is running out.

 

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MAF or airleak from hoses/boots in that area?

[fatharris]

MAF seems fine, as do the hoses, I've dropped it off with TwoSmoke to work his magic now.

 

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[twosmoke300]

You are sooo kind !

[fatharris]

You are sooo kind

I've been told that I'm like a modern-day Mother Teresa, but with nicer tits

 

Guessing Herman put up a fight then? 

[Wingz123]

Have you tried cleaning the gauze in the sender unit? Had em before where they’ve been blocked by a great big blob of mould! Sucked up with a hoover and what a difference!!

[fatharris]

Have you tried cleaning the gauze in the sender unit? Had em before where they’ve been blocked by a great big blob of mould! Sucked up with a hoover and what a difference!!

Thing is, he drives absolutely fine and doesn't stall as long as he is in "D"

 

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[purplebargeken]

D for Deutschland not Drive. 

[hairnet]

treat the 303 like AUTOBAHN JA>??

[fatharris]

Many thanks to TwoSmoke for his work on Herman, the idle control valve was changed, along with the coolant and a crank sensor, so he now starts and idles perfectly.

 

First fill up since 2016, forgot how cavernous the tank is

 

Herman is now insured and ready to take over daily duties whilst the Omega is off the road, once that's sorted, I'll look into finding a body shop willing to replace the spare wheel well!

 

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[twosmoke300]

Was a pleasure - currently looking at 7 series beemers on eBay

[fatharris]

Naturally, I highly recommend one.

 

A less crumpled one.

 

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[fatharris]

So, I've finally had ten minutes to sit down and get this thread up to date.

 

After getting an MOT pass in January, Herman has been amazing as a daily again, didn't even throw too many problems during the snow.

 

 

As posted in the News 24 thread, I recently acquired 3 punctures in the space of a week.

 

 

This was managed for a few days until I reached pay day.

 

 

A set of five LandSails were fitted for less than £300. They seem all right.

 

After this, Herman plodded on, being sweet as a nut. I even found someone breaking an E38 in the same colour so I could order more offside doors in decent condition and the rear bumper trim bit that was missing.

 

Then it went wrong. I was 30 miles into a 250 mile journey to have my upper jaw re-positioned, in the pissing rain, on a dual carriageway, when the wipers stopped dead.

 

So, I pulled over and mulled over my options. I could either try and bastardise it and make my hospital check-in time, or turn around, or I could wait until it stopped raining, beat a hasty return to home, spend an hour re-insuring and taxing the Kia and heading back up.

 

 

I bastardised it. It moved up fine, but needed help on the downward sweep.

 

 

This meant I had to ration out my wiper time, as every time I did it, the "dead zone" of the sweep increased. Annoyingly, it continued to rain.

 

Eventually, 120 miles later, it finally gave up.

 

 

The dead zone was too large and the rain still too heavy to proceed safely. Luckily, I wasn't far from my in-laws, so I called for Herman to be recovered home, whilst the father-in-law picked me up and took me to the hospital.

 

Whilst he was driving, I messaged the bloke breaking the E38 (the pallet of doors was getting dispatched the next day) and asked him to throw a wiper motor and arms onto the pallet, which thankfully he did.

 

Thankfully, I made it in time after rearranging one of my appointments.

 

Waking up after the operation was horrible.

 

 

And the swelling was horrendous.

 

 

However, a few days later, I was discharged. As Herman was safely at home on the driveway in Cornwall, the father in law picked me up again to take me back to theirs. They were coming down to visit us the day after, so it made sense to stay with them overnight and hitch a lift.

 

I was discharged on the Friday and had a follow up appointment on the Wednesday. I was ordered to rest as much as I can to allow recovery. Unfortunately, I had to fix Herman to head up the line again.

 

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[fatharris]

Thankfully, by the time I got home from the hospital, there was a pallet of bits waiting for me in the garage:

 

160518-2 by Fat Harris, on Flickr

 

Rare shot of the Mini in its' natural habitat.

 

It was a glorious day out here, the Bank Holiday Monday sun was very much the tonic I needed after sitting in bed feeling sorry for myself over the weekend.

 

160518-3 by Fat Harris, on Flickr

 

The wiper motor in question. Obscured by a great many things.

 

160518-4 by Fat Harris, on Flickr

 

Fairly obvious what happened here - the grooves on the wiper arm had finally given up. The nearside one wasn't much better.

 

160518-5 by Fat Harris, on Flickr

 

160518-6 by Fat Harris, on Flickr

 

Windshield scuttle panel came off - the rubber seal on this had been deteriorating for years, and eventually crumbled to nothing when handled. Will deal with that later. 

 

160518-7 by Fat Harris, on Flickr

 

Bits of hard rubber seal and general dirt and debris filled the grooves of the windshield frame - lucky it wasn't rotten really!

 

160518-8 by Fat Harris, on Flickr

 

160518-9 by Fat Harris, on Flickr

 

A few bolts and components removed later and I finally had the broken wiper motor out and on the ground.

 

160518-10 by Fat Harris, on Flickr

 

All the gunk and crap was cleaned from the frame prior to re-fitting.

 

160518-11 by Fat Harris, on Flickr

 

The replacement motor was greased up and slotted into place.

 

160518-12 by Fat Harris, on Flickr

 

Appropriate tools were used for the task

 

160518-13 by Fat Harris, on Flickr

 

Eventually (started to run out of time) it all went back together.

 

160518-14 by Fat Harris, on Flickr

 

We have sweet wiper action once again.

 

160518-15 by Fat Harris, on Flickr

 

160518-16 by Fat Harris, on Flickr

 

So, that was that then, All done and ready for the follow-up (which went well).

 

160518-17 by Fat Harris, on Flickr

 

 

MORE TO FOLLOW.

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

Do you use Tim in Northampton for bits?

[fatharris]

Another week down the line, and the swelling was down to the point where I felt like I could do stuff a bit more.

 

So, onto the next task. Less photos this time.

 

There was clearly evidence of accident damage repair on the offside doors. The paint job was initially fine when I first got Herman, and quickly deteriorated, with crazing in the lacquer, and blown filler. The paint finish was letting the entire car down too.

 

So, easy way to rectify this.

 

 

I did the OSR door first, as it was slightly smaller and easier to lift.

 

Only difference between the two doors was a different plug for the window switch.

 

Original door:

 

 

New door:

 

 

Luckily, both plugs disassembled really easily and went back together just as well.

 

The door was built up on my sophisticated* workbench.

 

 

And fitted to the car. The alignment was surprisingly easy, and the trim bits were transposed from the old door.

 

"Piece of cake!" Thought I, "I'll do the front door next time the weather is good, it'll be easy!"

 

 

Annoyingly, as I'm recovering from having my upper jaw broken, moved into place and secured with pins and plates, the last thing I'm supposed to do is inflict any form of trauma to my face whilst recovering.

 

So, guess which daft prick managed to clock himself square on the jaw with a hammer whilst tidying tools away?

[fatharris]

Do you use Tim in Northampton for bits?

Nah, some bloke was breaking one on an E38 Facebook group. Really top bloke who went out of his way to make everything happen.

 

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[mrbenn]

Nice work on the doors, bastard heavy things when off the car I always find.

 

Glad the face is better. Looked painful.

[fatharris]

So, the next day was equally glorious. I was feeling optimistic. I cracked the door open (notice the trim bits fitted on the rear door!) And started stripping.

 

 

Door card off.

 

 

Completely stripped out, including the wiring loom. At this point, it was just to save some weight (I was still trying to take it easy)

 

 

One thing I wanted was to transpose the lock barrel over so the key would work in the door, so the handle came off too.

 

Ready for taking off!

 

 

And off!

 

 

Whilst it was off, I noticed some play in the top hinge. I had a spare door hinge, so I swapped them out and greased them up. Nil play now, happy days.

 

Found some light rust on the underside of the door:

 

 

Quick splash of paint:

 

 

I also ordered the wrong door handle cable a couple of years ago, but kept hold of it. Finally got a chance to use it just for the sake of it.

 

 

So, smooth sailing? It was, I agree, up until this point:

 

 

I had only just noticed the date on the loom (1994) and it finally dawned on me that the donor door didn't have a side airbag.

 

Original door (note the indent and three holes for airbag bolts):

 

 

New door, with a raised metal pressing and no bolt holes. By this point, I was too far gone. The only solution was to cut out the excess metal and make the airbag fit. I used some measurements taken from the old door to make it line up with the opening of the door card.

 

 

After much panicking, I made it fit. The anchor nuts used to secure the airbag to the door frame were transposed. By this time, I was running out of time and was starting to get a bit painful so the pictures get a bit sporadic.

 

 

As this wasn't an airbag door, the looms had to be swapped over too.

 

 

The door lock was changed over and greased whilst I was there. Key works in this lock now! The internal door handle cable run had to be modified to clear the airbag, cable ties proved up to the job.

 

 

Now everything was connected up, it was simply a case of fitting it back to the frame, connecting it up, refitting the door card:

 

 

All the electrical systems were tested - no airbag warning lights, all windows and electric mirrors worked, as does the seat memory system and central locking. Great success!

 

 

Last thing for the day was refitting the wind deflector and all the trim bits.

 

 

The alignment isn't 100% there on the front door, but it's fine for now and I'll revisit it when I feel a bit better.

 

A very successful day at the end.

 

Final pic from this batch - it's my offside door collection. The first three doors I bought were in a shocking condition so they weren't used. Now everything is working, I'll take a spare window regulator and glass front and back, stick them in the garage storage space and scrap the rest.

 

 

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[fatharris]

Finally, onto today. A nice, gentle one today.

 

Some arsehole teared through the village the other night, nicking tyres from the top of the village and dumping them in peoples' gardens and on the road. I volunteered to return them.

 

 

After that, Herman had a well-deserved wash. I had fitted the centre rear bumper trim when I changed the wiper motor but forgot to get a photo of it, which made the car look a lot more complete.

 

 

 

 

I also polished out some scratches out of the new doors - I forgot the before and afters, but they are in much better condition than the old doors and a really good colour match to boot.

 

Finally, I decided to clean up the leather. I'd heard about this method, but was sceptical.

 

 

It actually came up really nicely. Steering wheel rim is super black and shiny now.

 

 

That's me up to speed. Herman is due a service now, which will be carried out soon.

 

Cheers for reading the ramblings of a mad man, just glad I've caught up on this thread. Not bad work considering I'm still meant to be resting and am not allowed to attempt chewing for another four weeks!

 

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[Schaefft]

Just awesome to see the care you put into this 728i, most of them are just getting scrapped now. E38s are amazing cars, pretty much the best car (next the E39) you can buy for a grand. I had a 728i ('97 SWB auto in orient blue) myself for a little while, bought it for 500 quid and loved it. Even put a new MOT on it when it was needed (before selling it a little later to a colleague who drove it for a year or two longer...). One of the front springs snapped one day when backing out of my parking space, apart from that I didnt have any serious issues with it in the short time I owned it. The E39 Ive had for almost 4.5 years now replaced it, and I now have another large dark blue fullsize cruiser from the 90s. 

 

RIP, unfortunately it doesn't appear to be with us anymore if you believe the DVLA.

[Supernaut]

MEGA RESPECK

[fatharris]

 

 

E38s are amazing cars, pretty much the best car (next the E39) you can buy for a grand....

A grand? Those days are over now. They've started shooting up in price. Even with the crash damage, knackered paintwork and 30k miles I've plonked on it, it's worth a lot more than I paid for it.

 

 

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[Datsuncog]

RIP, unfortunately it doesn't appear to be with us anymore if you believe the DVLA.

Maybe exported, rather than cubed?

 

Possibly wishful thinking on my part, mind... these are phenomenal cars, it still shocks me that even now survivors are being scrapped over trivial issues. But maybe they've finally turned the corner from bangerdom to youngtimer classic, if prices are on the rise...

 

Equally delighted to see this one getting some lurve... a fine result!

[wrenchvolt]

Beautiful car. The use you have had out of Herman is fantastic. A real credit to you sir.

[Schaefft]

A grand? Those days are over now. They've started shooting up in price. Even with the crash damage, knackered paintwork and 30k miles I've plonked on it, it's worth a lot more than I paid for it.

 

 

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Thats because you underpaid for yours. I see 728i for under a grand in "acceptable" condition that will sell for under 1000£ every week.

 

Maybe exported, rather than cubed?

 

Possibly wishful thinking on my part, mind... these are phenomenal cars, it still shocks me that even now survivors are being scrapped over trivial issues. But maybe they've finally turned the corner from bangerdom to youngtimer classic, if prices are on the rise...

 

 

Unfortunately unlikely. The guy I sold it to didnt have a clue about cars. It failed its MOT because of bushes and rusty brake pipes a year later, he probably just scrapped it. I might have bought it back if he just asked me, who knows.

 

[fatharris]

Last Monday, on the way home, Herman decided to dump a lot of coolant and start overheating.

 

 

Mercifully, it happened less than 300yds from home and it was all downhill, so the coolant temperature peaked at around 107c. So no danger to the engine, just clouds of coolant steam emanating from the engine.

 

I already knew what this would be, thanks to TwoSmoke pointing out a small hairline crack in the thermostat housing, and I finally had time to change it this week anyway, so it only needed to hold on for a couple more days, typical!

 

So, on Tuesday, I dedicated some time to Herman.

 

First, I tried seeing if he'll fit in the garage with the Mini still in. Not a chance, but nice to see he would fit if the Mini was out.

 

 

Unfortunately, there's only a few inches either side of Herman when parked in the doorway, which makes getting in and out a bit of a pain.

 

Still, in and bonnet up.

 

 

Viscous fan got disconnected, as did the expansion tank top hose and the radiator shroud, all came off with minimal fuss, but a lot of wiggling and twisting.

 

 

Then, it's simply a case of removing an engine lifting point, and three other bolts and the thermostat housing is finally free! Old Vs new for comparison, the hairline crack was adjacent to the bleed point. Luckily, I had the housing on the shelf ready to go.

 

 

Whilst everything was out, seemed daft not to change the auxiliary drive belt and air con drive belt. Never done one on a transverse engine, and I bloody loved it. So much space, compared to the Rover 75 diesel I did before.

 

 

Long overdue though!

 

 

 

 

Thermostat housing was refitted.

 

 

All components got refitted and coolant replaced and bled. Weirdly, the heater doesn't seem to be as ferocious as it used to be, but it is when set to windscreen defrost mode. Coolant temperature is bang on and it's not losing any so that's fine.

 

 

Be daft whilst it's in here not to give it a service, especially with the parts on the shelf. I've detailed what I do on a service earlier in this thread.

 

 

 

 

Whilst the engine cover was off, I cleaned it.

 

 

 

Finally, in 33k of owning this motor, I've never changed the front pads on it. There was still 3mm on the pads, but there was a set on the shelf in the garage ready to go.

 

 

Another piece of cake, the brembo four pot pistons were easy to rewind back, and all sliding areas were lubricated.

 

Finally, the old girl was hauled out onto the driveway, finished.

 

 

 

I always jot down on a receipt the work done. I know it's not as authentic as a service history stamp, but it's good for me to keep track.

 

 

The following morning, Herman got a wash too.

 

 

So Herman is good for another year, the MOT is due in January, and I can't foresee any obstacles to that either.

 

Cheers for reading.

[purplebargeken]

Phew! That was lucky. Good call on the belts too