Bloody Big Bad Benz is the Bloody Biggest Piece of Tosh

[doug]

How did you fix the windows?

[anonymous user]

They took the electric motors off the front ones

[Junkman]

We took the door cards off, tested whether they work, they worked, so we put the door cards back on.

[billyboy406v6]

That's the way, soon be posting how boringly reliable it is, top mendings.

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

The squealing blower has become quite irritating. Fortunately, the W124's motor is relatively accessible. Rather than buried behind the dash, it is in the engine bay and can be found simply by removing a few pieces of inconsequential trim. 

 

 

In a flash our screaming blower was exposed. I had found a well illustrated guide on the internet for its removal, but, naturally, the motor I uncovered was entirely different. 

 

 

I decided it would be better to leave it where it was. I fed it a little engine oil and let it run. After a minute it was whisper quiet. 

 

 

Now that it was raining and getting dark, there was nothing left to do except spend an hour wishing I had taken reference photos of how all the trim fitted back together. 

 

Two hours work to drip oil on a motor shaft. Cars are great fun, aren't they. 

[Junkman]

What a hateful piece of shit.

[forddeliveryboy]

Sell it before the front balljoints let go.

 

This car is obviously pure danger just waiting until you've put too much of your time and money into it before introducing its trump card. At the very least, start treating it with a little contempt by running it on a beko fuel mix, just to let it know you can make it suffer more than it can you.

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

Ha. You've never done a fan on an E34 BMW with the DeAvia heater a/c unit. It's 2 days work. Dashboard out, degas a/c, entire fucking heater assy out, split the heater box, replace fan.

 

Reassembly is a reversal of dismantling (Rev. J Haynes, 1958).

[richardmorris]

My fan has started squealing too. I think it's the cold weather. I think mine has the larger twin hamster wheels. Where did you find the online guide and how easy was it to get the wiper motor out of the way?

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

Here is the guide. The wiper motor removal was easy. There are four 10mm nuts to remove, then the whole unit lifts out in one piece. Major benefit of the single wiper - no linkages or oily worm drive. 

[Junkman]

Today, we drove this hateful piece of shit all the way to Scotoshire.

It was the most miserable journey I had to endure west of a Lada.

 

The result: 31.56 OMGMPG. Diesel.

 

My 405 2.0 Petrol auto needs less, but it feels like Formula 1 in comparison.

 

Mercedes?

 

Never again.

[robinmasters]

Junkman, with this thread title you have inadvertently inspired a phrase for German chod; "Bosch Tosh".

 

I will of course let you have 10% of any royalties I receive for this expression, and have you a licence, in perpetuity, to use the phrase verbally (for personal, non-profit making purposes), though it will remain my intellectual property.

[320touring]

Was good fun recreating "Autobahn'94" on the run down from Perth.

 

for refernce the 730i (v8, natch) did an indicated 29.4 mpg.

 

you wouldnt like the leather though;)

[twosmoke300]

I'm glad others are realising that the all German cars are awesome thing is just pure bullshit

[fatharris]

Jesus, my 728i would do 36 on a run, something is surely wrong?

 

Sent from my Vodafone 890N using Tapatalk

[Lacquer Peel]

Get some cabbage juice for it.

[dean36014]

I must have been spoiled, my old 250E diesel, multivalve, would easily do over 40 mpg at non legal speeds. my mates 250E which had the old engine in and was the slowest thing known to man would do even more. Plus the liberal application of Lidls finest quality cooking oil made it either cheaper to run. Loved that car, it went to Poland to be broken for spares as it was a fortune over there apparently. It had only just passed its MOT, and was mint!

[chaseracer]

Hmmm... heater fan.  Along with the u/s driver's window, that's another job I never got around to on the 300E.  Sorry, doug.

 

Still, it went like the proverbial off a thermally-enhanced manual aggregate transference implement.

[Junkman]

Oh, before I forget, that godforsaken motherless heater fan started to squeak again on the way back and the rear windows stopped working.

 

WARNING:

 

Do NOT believe a word from those Mercedes apologists!

[richardmorris]

Spent yesterday morning taking the bottom of the windscreen area apart. Which to be fair was quite easy.

 

Then I found this enclosed box, not the nice open one like yours.

 

Hacked it a bit to get a GTX spray straw to the ends, but basically just managed to get the inside of the car smelling of wd40. I need a Dremel! I did manage to get the windscreen rubber seal to fit better when it was all back in place though, so it's not a complete waste of time. And all the plastic parts were cleaned and polished with autoglym vinyl and rubber care too, so it looks pretty smart now.

 

Oh and mines had a windscreen at some point as I found a few chunks of glass around.

[Junkman]

I'm about two milliseconds seconds away from using a sledgehammer on this hateful piece of shit in the heat of passion.

[richardmorris]

I'm about two milliseconds seconds away from using a sledgehammer on this hateful piece of shit in the heat of passion.

 

How about a match in the fuel tank?

 

If both rear windows not working it will be a common connection point - front and rear switches for the rear windows must be connected somewhere. Alternatively don't use the rear windows- it's like a 2cv!

[Junkman]

Spent yesterday morning taking the bottom of the windscreen area apart. Which to be fair was quite easy.

 

Then I found this enclosed box, not the nice open one like yours.

 

 

The funny* bit is that you can't remove the fan motor despite the box is open, which I find downright cynical.

That was the reason for it being oiled and not replaced.

[Junkman]

How about a match in the fuel tank?

 

That dreary shit it runs on isn't even flammable.

 

If both rear windows not working it will be a common connection point

Nope. Mercedes manages to make them fail despite there is no such thing as a common connection point.

 

Alternatively don't use the rear windows- it's like a 2cv!

That's exactly my point. It's a M-E-R-C-E-D-E-S.

My inclination to accept any 2CVness in it is less than zero.

[richardmorris]

I think it's fair to say that you're not bonding with it.

[Junkman]

I'm not only not bonding with it, I hate it with every molecule in my body.

 

It's massivley overhyped tosh of inferior quality that lives on a reputation it received from apologists,

while at the same time it has the charme of people wearing suits made from the same fabric as the seat covers.

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

It's a M-E-R-C-E-D-E-S.

♫

Our little boy is four years old, and quite a little man...

[Lacquer Peel]

Cheap old car in 'has some problems' shock, part 94.

[Junkman]

Mercedes apologist.

[richardmorris]

The funny* bit is that you can't remove the fan motor despite the box is open, which I find downright cynical.

That was the reason for it being oiled and not replaced.

Tell me about it! On mine the black case is screwed to the bulkhead with eight screws. Four top and two either side. Six came off easily and so I moved to the n/s to get the last two only to find that they are just visible behind part of the metal bulkhead frame. How on earth did it get screwed in?