Best car nicknames

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

Got any?

 

I'll kick off with:

 

Vauxhall Ashtray

Vauxhall Belmarsh

Vauxhall Chevaliers

 

Austin Ambastardor (aka Austin Ambarrasment)

 

Ford Fester

Ford Crapi 

 

Morris Shital

 

 

etc etc.

[babydriver]

Sack of cac..........swambos cvt Micra

[jonny69]

Ford Anglebox/Spanglebox/Janglebox/Spanglia/Berjanglia/Gerjanglia etc

 

Shitroen

 

Mercedisease

 

Poo-geot

 

Lotarse

 

I wouldn't call any of these 'best' though. Fairly lame attempt at something that I actually find quite annoying

[Jim Bell]

 

Lolvos in general.

[Tamworthbay]

The Audi Clit, because every **** has one

[2MB]

Any 3 wheeled Reliant: pigs head

[barefoot]

Plastic pig surely?

[steve_earwig]

AC Invacar - pencil sharpener

My mate's wife used to call his Scimitar a drastic plastic rollerskate

Fester, Corset, Craptina, Crapi, Grenader I suppose.

All aggro, Landcrab.

[DVee8]

Allegro = all-argo,a-leg-over.

 

A mate always called ford xr cars a 2be,3be and 4be.?

 

Astra disastra   ashtray

[mercrocker]

Triumph Dolloposhite

 

Ford Chance-It van

 

Ford Defect (100E generic term)

 

Alltin Tinny - any early pre-plastic Mini

 

Pig Eyed Landy - pre- Series III

 

Sprog-Eyed Fright - Mk1 Sprite

 

Mondeo VandenPlas - Jag X Type

[J-Rod]

 

 

Mondeo VandenPlas - Jag X Type 

 

Possibly the world's best ever con. 

 

Pre-Luddite - Prelude 

[Bone]

Lancia Thelma

[Doctormop]

Showing my age here,

Slumber Septic -  Humber Sceptre

Slumber Inferior - Humber Imperial

Ford Doziac      -  Ford Zodiac

Banana Squeezer - Hispano Suiza

Ding Dong -          De Dion

Squeally    -          Austin Healey

Ford Pubic -         Ford Coarse-hair                   (Sorry couldn't resist)

[martc]

Landcrab wins this thread.

 

I knew someone who referred to Ford Esuks and Congertinas.

 

He also called those enormous, possibly homemade, towing hitches on the back of Transits (the ones you could stand on) "pog bars".

 

And talking of Fords, don't forget the Grandad.

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

Sunbeam Rapist

 

Hillman Wimp/Pimp/Gimp

 

Sunbeam Spaghetti

 

Humber Septic

 

Ford Heffer (Zephyr)

 

Hillman Sphinx / Sphincter

 

Ford Locust (Focus)

[stuboy]

mondingo

mondogno

[oldcars]

Plastic pig surely?

Resin rocket 

[fordperv]

ford scrote (escort)

renault migraine (megane)

ford tranny (transit)

ford fester (fiesta)

ford focarse (focus)

 

i used to call corsa b's new potato's because of their shape

[Junkman]

Renault Daphne

Renault Chloride

Dodge Fart

Plymouth Buster

Seat Arouser

Alfa Romeo Anal

Mercury Turnip Crusher

[Pete-M]

High'n'dry Accident.

[alf892]

From Jalopy (I think)

 

Fjord Cortina= Volvo 200 series

[alf892]

off topic maybe a bit but older style traders slang.....

 

Painted by a local artist - used to be a favourite term used by the auctioneer

 

Got a piano in it - has radio

 

Got a roof on it - has vinyl roof

 

In the right colour - another auction one used to describe red cars

[chaseracer]

SsoWrong Hideous.

 

 

I win.

 

[MrBiscuits]

In our house:

 

 

= Teapot

[J-Rod]

That's just reminded me

 

Audi TT - Tosser's Teapot 

[MrBiscuits]

SsoWrong Hideous.

 

 

I win.

 

Ah, didn't they also make the Rectum...

[danthecapriman]

Nissan Bluebird - Nissan Turdbird

 

Diahatsu - Brownhatsu

 

Transit - Transhit

[mercrocker]

Billy Bunter - Hillman Hunter

 

Billy Blundered - BMC 1100

 

Austin Neapolitan - Metropolitan

[cros]

Citroen Cacktoss

[rml2345]

In our house:

 

ka.jpg

 

= Teapot

Oddly enough that's what we call them!

 

Ford Exploder and Direhatsue are the only car ones but the best OV EVAR has to be Magnetti Spaghetti.