Automotive bull5hit facts thread

[320touring]

^And three hours to describe it.

not really!

 

*starts timing*

 

*types "It is shit"*

 

*stops timing*

 

4secs maybe?

[alf892]

Robin, makers of the popular Reliant car, once experimented with an engine powered by vinegar.

oh yes..... the vinegar stroke

[fordperv]

It had to be thrashed vigorously

[John F]

Was it a type of Wankel?

[320touring]

Apparently, the sight of Vanessa Feltz can render it floppy amd immobile

[Pillock]

oh yes..... the vinegar stroke

 

That's where this rather rude saying comes from.

 

You get two stroke and four stroke engines. There's also the six stroke engine for vinegar-power, which adds another cycle - suck, squeeze, bang, blow, cleaning up, guilt. Thus the "vinegar strokes" are located right at the end of the process, and then the whole lot inevitably happens again and again.

[fred]

For every one thousand  Volvos to be bridged - God Kills a pope

[cms206]

For every one thousand Volvos to be bridged - God Kills a pope

The SVM wholeheartedly deny any association with the recent spate of Pope Deaths across the Vatican, and categorically deny any involvement with anyone who may or may not go by the name of God.

[purplebargeken]

An Audi driver signalled for me to join the M25 carriageway in front of him yesterday. Thus confirming that all Audi drivers are polite and courteous.

[rml2345]

The UK motorway network with it's centre on London was inspired by watching water circling a drain.

[Sloth in a bowl]

The E series engine fitted to all Maxis has always been a diesel engine, but the factory forgot to tell the dealerships and customers.

The reason for it sounding like a bag of spanners and running like shit from new has always been down to the users putting the wrong fuel in it.

 

If you run the engine on WVO then it will have enough torque to pull the entire Oakland Raiders cheer-leading squad and achieve 80mpg around town.

[Pillock]

The motorway network numbering system is based on "swears per hour" giving an idea of driver frustration. The M1 is quite relaxing, the M25 is massively less so.

 

The M80 is in Scotland.

[Sloth in a bowl]

The next generation of Volkswagon products are going to have urea refill points next to the diesel fuel cap so that the user can refill the tank with NOx reducing ammonia when required.

 

Demonstration versions of the The Polo Pissflap edition will be in showrooms from January.

[Felly Magic]

The next generation of Volkswagon products are going to have urea refill points next to the diesel fuel cap so that the user can refill the tank with NOx reducing ammonia when required.

 

Demonstration versions of the The Polo Pissflap edition will be in showrooms from January.

 

I always had a feeling VW would end up taking the piss

[fred]

For every Talbot Tagora scrapped - Hollywood is alerted and churns out another Stephen Seagal on a ship/train/plane/hovercraft/ unicycle action movie to commentate the passing

[RichardK]

Talbot Tagoras don't get scrapped, they ascend upon a heavenly four-post lift to the great motorway in Valhalla, where rust does sleep, Douvrins don't rattle, and Four-Star is free.

[inconsistant]

You can't buy a new yellow car in Scotland any more

[Parky]

Austin Rovers "S" series engine was designed and built by Honda, whereas all the advanced 12 and 16 valve engines featured in Civics and Accords were designed and built by Austin Rover in the Longbridge facility.

[Noel Tidybeard]

hondas 2.0 litre type-r engine is in fact based on the o-series but with the oil leaks fixed

[twosmoke300]

Oil leaks turned into oil consumption maybe

[rml2345]

The Rover T-Series engine is completely oil tight. What leaks out is a special tar like substance installed at the factory so that owners remember to check the oil level regularly.

[Noel Tidybeard]

The Rover T-Series engine is completely oil tight. What leaks out is a special tar like substance installed at the factory so that owners remember to check the oil level regularly.

the tar like sustance was supposed to be waxoil but rover couldn't/woulnd't pay the bulk purchase price for a 25 gallon drum to fill the cars

[brownnova]

Rear Fog lamps (which I shall be needing this mornin) were invented by fictitious explorer/traveller Phineas Fogg who whilst going around the world in 80 days happened upon misty patches. Not being able to see things in front of him he attached red lights to the back of his transportation. He insisted that his new invention carry his name, Fogg lamps. He later went on to invent crisps.

 

Front foglights however were invented by BMW in the 1990s for intimidation purposes.

[pshome]

Talbot Tagoras don't get scrapped, they ascend upon a heavenly four-post lift to the great motorway in Valhalla, where rust does sleep, Douvrins don't rattle, and Four-Star is free.

Wrong thread, this is a true fact, proof below. Lift went up further and came back empty, i was there, seen it!

 

[purplebargeken]

A recent law was passed in Parliament stating that driving in London with only one working headlight is now legal, and indeed compulsory. This is to identify the number of tourists travelling around London in cars at night/day/anywhere in between.

 

Seems to be working just fine. 

[martc]

Apropos todays weather - silver cars do not need to have any lights on in the fog as they stand out so well against the silvery background.

 

 

grrrrr

[John F]

One car licence can be used as the equivalent of two motorcycle licences by two motorcyclists, as long as they are travelling together.

[For Fiats Sake]

13% of the cost of petrol goes to the exchequer, 7% to the retailer, 50% goes in royalties to the Petrol family, after production costs of approximately 20%, the remaining 30% pays for AA branded goods at the counter to be transported from China by a system pioneered in the second world war to automatically drop bombs from air ballons.

[fred]

If two Deloreans collided it would cause the universe to implode and revert us all back to the Big Bang again

[harvestman]

Every single car with cross-shaped rims was broken up for spares a decade ago.