75 P6 V8 - Bye, this car

[Junkman]

There is basically nothing wrong with that bloody car.

It's just a thorough recommission job, actually.

The valvetrain had to be cleaned up though, since there was no oiling to the top, i.e. the bores to and inside the rocker shafts were clogged up.

If you don't address this, the rockers won't be lubricated, and wear out the shaft, which results in lots of leakage oil, which eventually will starve the

bottom end.

Guess why I know.

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

★ Ã¢Ëœâ€¦   DAY 20  Ã¢Ëœâ€¦ Ã¢Ëœâ€¦

IT DRIVES!... with video proof:
 

 
2.5l of ATF awoke the slumbering gearbox, and it can drive forward and backwards. Very slowly, because it still doesn't have any brakes. Just for fun we filled the master cylinder and started pumping the pedal. Within a few pumps the pedal firmed up and everything was looking quite positive until a pipe burst, showering the engine bay (and Junkman) with DOT4. 
 
The fuel system is now completely functional. In addition to the clogged fuel pump and sawn off fuel lines (thanks again for that, previous owner) the biggest problem was nasty old slime in the system. Remember that lovely brand new fuel filter in the first video? Here's what it looked like after we hooked up the petrol tank:


Gunked up Fuel Filter by cdconelrad, on Flickr

It goes without saying the carbs weren't happy running on that. We ran the car using our gravity feed system until the pump had dragged all that horror through the lines.

Now the really odd thing: the boot has developed new car smell. Seriously! It's uncanny. If you kidnapped an estate agent and put him in the boot of this car, he'd tell the police it was a 64 plate Audi A4. So if you want your car to smell brand new, I can recommend spilling a bunch of petrol and then locking some 40 year old carpet in it overnight.

[Jon]

Oh bugger, this isn't good news. Something about the video was giving me notions of Christine when Arnie Cunningham buys her. Then you mention the new car smells and the seemingly easy fixes. Look out for 50's rock n' roll on the radio and remember, members on here are shite-ers. Not shitters.

[Junkman]

This car is not possessed.

Mine is.

 

Also, what Mr Conelrad makes sound so easy, was in fact a right old bitch at times.

[Jon]

Granted, but it's certainly no Phillibusmo Princess; that car's like the antithesis of Christine. This one appears to be taking time to rectify, without costing an absolute packet in the process. Whichever, it's a great effort and I'm almost a little surprised that the fruits of your labours haven't attracted more comments!

 

Keep up the good work!

[Skizzer]

I'm almost a little surprised that the fruits of your labours haven't attracted more comments!

 

I think people may be struck dumb in the presence of excellence.

 

Me, I'm especially interested in the fuel tank crap content (with my Mk1 Golf in mind, which like all its brethren has had 20+ years of the filler neck steadily dropping crumbs of rust into it).  Are you planning to flush the tank out?

[Junkman]

That won't be necessary.

We put about 10 litres of fresh petrol into the tank. After that, the black stuff arrived at the engine, fouled the fuel filter

and the engine wasn't running right.

So we connected the gravity feed again, disconnected the fuel pipe to the filter and ran it into a bowl.

We then started the car on gravity feed, and let the fuel pump pump all the shit from the tank into the bowl.

After about five litres, it pumped clear, fresh petrol, so all the sludge was out of the tank.

We reconnected everything, filled 20 litres of fresh petrol into the tank, and it has been running perfectly fine ever since,

the new fuel filter still being perfectly clean.

 

Today the car will be transported to my local garage to get the brake system overhauled.

The way things are going, an MoT is imminent during the course of next week.

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

Inconsequential update:

 

Like my subtly customised badge?

 

 

I knew I was keeping those tiny pots of Airfix paint for something. 

[Junkman]

Me likey veddy morch.

Can you do your magic to a badge I have lying around here?

And how in the hell did you bend back the stainless trim on the back side?

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

Sure. To bend the metal trim back you need pliers, a series of prying screwdrivers, and most importantly, a very high tolerance of 'cracking perspex' sound. 

[Junkman]

The nerves of the y00t. Sadly long gone.

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

☃

DAY 33
 
New wheels and tyres!

 

Four new tyres, including fitting, balancing and new valves, for £171. Not much to complain about there!

 

Next update: World of Upholstery Cleaning and Foam Replacement

[Bren]

 

★ Ã¢Ëœâ€¦  DAY 15  ★ Ã¢Ëœâ€¦

 

Progress has been swift! I've been visiting the car every afternoon this week, and Junkman has been idling away his lunch hours under its bonnet. As a result, it has a functional charging system and a repaired fuel pump. Unfortunately the fuel tank contains something unpleasant, presumably 1988 vintage four star, which turned the fuel filter black and reduced our easy starting sweet running V8 to a spluttering mess.

 

The jammed fuel reserve tap was a big problem. It's a simple cable controlled tap, but it lives in the deepest darkest recesses of the engine bay and access is notoriously difficult. Fortunately Junkman is something of an expert at fuel tap manipulation and a couple of lunch hours worth of precision surgery resurrected the tap, complete with a new ethanol resistant seal.

 

But it hasn't been all good news. This car might well be low milage, but if this is really a 35k car, it's been 35k of short journeys and zero oil changes.

 

rockers-oil.jpg

 

Faced with that evidence of utter neglect, the best we could do was clean everything as thoroughly as possible, and flush the engine with cheap oil before putting the decent stuff in. We should have known... how could anything with these stripes not be neglected?

 

stripes.jpg

 

Bad, but not the worst I have seen - sometimes the rocker gear looks like it has been tarmac'ed over, it it will still run.

 

Never use flushing oil - the tappets will rattle for time immemorial. Cheap 20/50 is best, although it is'nt as cheap as it used to be.

 

For an alloy engine, the V8 will take a fair bit of neglect.

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

Just a little photo update to remind you that this car still exists! It's now back from the garage with partially functioning brakes. I say partially functioning, because I sent off the broken brake servo for reconditioning on 1st November, and there's still no sign of it. A used servo was acquired as a stopgap, but this too turned out to be knackered. Fortunately this one isn't completely seized, so the car at least brakes, albeit unassisted. 
 

 
So many things to repair. Starting with the really important stuff, like this:



This badge is supposed to twist into that socket, and is secured by a lock inside the boot. Or, if you're the previous owner of this car, you could glue it on. Sideways. Thanks for that, it was a lot of fun to pry off.

It's still nice inside. Dusty, but dry - and since it's spent four months sitting in the open, I'm thrilled with that.



Gradually, piece by piece, this car is being coaxed back to life.



Further updates to follow.

[Inspector Morose]

Oh, that dash.

[Junkman]

If I didn't have a car with this dash, I'd buy it now.

[captain_70s]

That dash is something to behold. The car as a whole is just ace, I'd roll in it with the mismatched wings for full Gaffer-age.

 

Having said that I'm the sort of tasteless mug who'd paint it brown with gold stripes in the first place*...

 

 

*I currently own a green car with gold stripes...

[Junkman]

Same here.

I'm tempted to festoon mine with golden stripes for added LS&2SBness, but even if I did, as much as trying to outbigchris Mr Conelrad's effort, would be futile.

His car is currently back at the junkmanish estates and I'm quite impressed by the progress he's making with it.

 

I IZ WELL ENVY

[Noel Tidybeard]

the green arrows on the dash for the indicators are 10154.541% class

[Inspector Morose]

BRAKE

BEAM

OIL

OTHER WARNING LIGHT I CANT REMEMBER WHAT IT SAID

 

classy.

[HMC]

I know there are fans of the early p6 with their strip speedos etc, but for me these 70s ones with the chunky detailing and that dash are just brilliant. Great pics and brilliant re working of that ad!

[They_all_do_that_sir]

LOVE that dash. It must have seemed like THE FUTURE when it was lost.

 

Where did it go wrong for Rover.....

 

(I already know the answer)

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

SPECIAL OFFER

 

 

A new 1:43 scale model of this car is now available from DogPooBin Scale Classics. Act now! This model is limited to a run of only 100 pieces, so is certain to appreciate in value until a later run of 100,000 renders them all worthless. The impeccable detailing beautifully captures the true essence of Rover P6 vapourware by costing a fortune and never being delivered. Money will leave your bank account, but you will never get to hold this model - guaranteed! 

 

If you want to buy this model, click here NOW!

[cort16]

At least you've got bumpers

[xtriple]

I like the link to 'buy it here'  

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

At least you've got bumpers

 

I have a front bumper, and a rear bumper which looks like a graph of the stock market in 1929. 

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

[anonymous user]

I assume that is a facsimile of an MOT certificate, courtesy of photoshop tippex and a biro. Just remember it's spelled Rover not Rowver.

[Ghosty]

It was red and brown before...?!

[Skizzer]

Is that Junkman's possessed one?

 

Mrs Skizzer spotted a P6 on the M4 the other day, by the way, and now wants one. It was all the same colour though, rather boringly.