Puncture goes mental- the latest.

[dollywobbler]

These boys will sort it out (sorry, this thread has reached this point!)

[TimothyClaypole]

I've a day off Sunday or Monday so we'll get it sorted and the thread can drift off into the mists of time.

 

(to be recalled at a later date no doubt).

[Albert Ross]

Bloody hell. Yamyams giving linguistic lessons... Only on Autoshite. Is the nut off yet, or do we have to endure yet another ream of sub-standard drivel?

[Luxobarges_Are_Us]

I imagine they discovered the midlands before they discovered America.

 

Having lived in Leicester and worked in Cov for a while, my English is Midlands-centric (see what I did there?)!

 

I've a day off Sunday or Monday so we'll get it sorted and the thread can drift off into the mists of time.

 

PM sent.

 

DNJ asked for PITCHERS, and I will make sure to take my camera along and get some EXCLUSIVE FOOTAGE of trying to get the bastard off.

[Captain Flimble]

In Birmingham they say MOM but in Stoke they say MAM. Crazy eh??

 

Whatever...but we were talking about English language

 

I had a problem with the locking wheelnuts on my BMW. I had just had the wheels changed, and the nuts had been tightened up with an air wrench so I went through my usual routine of loosening them off an re-torquing them at home so I wouldn't get stranded at the side of the road with a puncture and a wheel that wouldn't come of. Problem was, the mechaniac had put them on so tight that I couldn't get one wheel off at all and destroyed my nut key.

 

Trip to BMW dealers for another nut key, then to my local garage to get it off using his air wrench (I hadn't yet got my own, and the tyre dealer was miles away - the only one I could find at the right price with a strong enough machine to remove Bridgestone tyres from M-sport wheels). He duly buggered the second nut key, but suggested I went to National Tyres who have a special narrow-jawed bit designed to clamp onto wheel nuts.

 

Problem was the BMW wheels are so wide that even this wouldn't reach the nut. They recommended a local garage who might be able to help. I got another nut key from BMW for good measure and went in search.

 

The local garage recommended by the national blue-chip garage service turned out to be a grotty shed at the end of a rough track secreted behind some slightly more salubrious but nonetheless still grotty industrial units. I was met by a man dressed head to foot in oil who waved away the new nut key and said "give me the fucked one, mate" and stuck it in the bolt. He then produced a foot long iron bar and a lump hammer and beat the shit out of the nut for about half a minute after which he turned it out using just a socket.

 

Turns out this guy was a local rally navigator and mechanic. He was building up a MKII Ezzy in his shed so I had a good chat with him after parting with a fiver, which is all he would take. He was used to fixing things on the hoof when things went wrong on rally stages; probably using lumps of wood and rocks found lying at the side of the track.

 

Another time I lost my nut key and just bashed a star key in instead - worked fine.

 

So my advice to you is - just twat it

[Pete-M]

I'm waiting for the DVD.

[Rod/b]

I'm surprised this thread hasn't got it's own Facebook page.

[Justin Case]

my English is Midlands-centric !

 

 

If that is the case, then gie it sum 'ommer

[chaseracer]

If that is the case, then gie it sum 'ommer

 

Ar.

 

[flat4alfa]

just

[flat4alfa]

checking

[flat4alfa]

If we're on page 10 yet.

[flat4alfa]

/ coat

[Des]

I'm sure it must have been suggested already, but I'm not reading 10 pages to check,,,,,

It's got alloys, leave vehicle unattended for 3 minutes in Slough / Peck Nam / Luton / Liverpool, jobs a good 'un.

[Pete-M]

It's got alloys, leave vehicle unattended for 3 minutes in Slough / Peck Nam / Luton / Liverpool, jobs a good 'un.

 

Always makes me laugh this. I don't know anyone who's had alloy wheels stolen in Liverpool in the last 15-20 years.

 

Ah well. Some things never change

 

[Guest]

It's got alloys, leave vehicle unattended for 3 minutes in Slough / Peck Nam / Luton / Liverpool, jobs a good 'un.

 

Always makes me laugh this. I don't know anyone who's had alloy wheels stolen in Liverpool in the last 15-20 years.

 

Ah well. Some things never change

 

 

What about my tax disc you 'borrowed'?

[Pete-M]

Ah well. Some things never change

 

 

What about my tax disc you 'borrowed'?

 

It's in the post.

[worldofceri]

Why is this thread ten pages long? I can't be arsed to read it all.

 

Anyway, here's a picture of my most recent puncture, which may or may not be off topic.

 

 

Also, one of my locking wheel nuts is slightly broken but kind of still works OK. I'm not sure if this is the right thread for this... Perhaps I should start a new one.

[Albert Ross]

How about removing the other nuts and going for a short drive, to loosen the offending article. Then giving us all chance to think about other things. Please.

[Parky]

For an added "OMG DAT IZ MENTALZ" suggestion, have you tried applying battery acid to said nut? Sure it'll probably fuck up the nut, stud, and wheel but will probably eat its way to a solution eventually.

 

Personally I'd dremmel through the damn thing....................

[Guest]

Ah well. Some things never change

 

 

What about my tax disc you 'borrowed'?

 

It's in the post.

 

Well, I haven't received it. I'll see you in court - NO ARGUMENTS.

[John F]

Any progress on this, Luxo?

 

Has someone gas-axed the offending hub off the car yet?

[TimothyClaypole]

All sorted after a fashion:

 

The offending nut:

 

 

Quite chewed up by the "Profi's" already.

 

My mate Dave who wandered along the street to lend a hand drinking beer along with some labouring:

 

 

The remains of the stud:

 

 

What was left of the nut and stud:

 

 

And finally my hand after hitting it with the hammer:

 

 

 

To cut a long afternoon short, the garage(s) I think had stripped the threads holding the stud into the hub so the whole thing was just spinning around like Kylie so hammering a socket on was no good as it was just spinning the stud and nut.

 

After a LOT of grinding with the Dremel the nut came off and the stud fell inside the hub, Dave was retreiving that in the picture so Luxo wasn't driven mental with it rattling around inside the hub...

 

The wheel needs refurbing a bit. but a new stud and bolt and everythings rosy.

 

Had a laugh with Luxo and Dave, drank some beer/cider while the sun was out and it was better than spending my day off ironing.

 

 

(Oh and DON'T unfasten a caliper bracket bolt with a ratchet spanner when said bolt doesn't clear part of the suspension when unfastened meaning you can't get the spanner off or the bolt tightened back up - my bad).

[Luxobarges_Are_Us]

Cheers Mr Claypole! I think I do owe you some more beer!

[tonedepear]

 

YAY!

[trigger]

About fucking time!

[Des]

Is that it? My mother could have sorted that.

 

[flat4alfa]

[AnthonyG]

You'd better not weigh that Honda in now, Luxo!

[Wilko220]

I resurrect this thread with great trepidation... but has anyone any experience of these?

 

Waste of money or useful tool?

 

http://www.halfords.com/webapp/wcs/stor ... yId_165469

 

Thanks!